


Be formless, shapeless - like water

by Ulota_crispa



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Dubious Morality, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Eventual Romance, F/M, Haruno Sakura-centric, Hatake Kakashi-centric, Mental Health Issues, Morally Ambiguous Character, One-Sided Attraction, Other, Politics, Protective Haruno Sakura, Sakura's development, Senju Tobirama Needs a Hug, Slow Burn, Some Humor, Strong Female Characters, Strong Haruno Sakura, Writer clearly not getting enough love, Writer is a dumbass
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-05
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-03-15 22:41:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 33
Words: 87,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28571670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ulota_crispa/pseuds/Ulota_crispa
Summary: Kakashi Hatake acknowledges his lack of involvement in his student's training and how he failed as a sensei. Sakura Haruno is finally making use of her potential despite being neglected by her teacher, becomes mature and accomplishes more than anyone else thought she would. Tobirama Senju sacrifices his well-being in order to maintain his dream of peace. All three of them make mistakes of varying degrees of importance.This is a story in which legends turn out to be human, confessions are long overdue, politics prove to be unforgiving and requiring sacrifices and the constraints of time become obliterated. Love in the shinobi world does not bring naïve hope that everything will be fine. All wrapped in a thin veil of fluff and humour, because why not.Rated M due to the planned content of the future chapters.Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto nor most of the characters described here.
Relationships: Haruno Sakura & Hatake Kakashi, Haruno Sakura & Uchiha Sasuke, Haruno Sakura/Senju Tobirama
Comments: 31
Kudos: 197





	1. left behind

**Author's Note:**

> Writing this story, I want to utilise Sakura's wasted potential and give her some depth. I adore this character, but I can understand the aversion of a large part of the fandom. 
> 
> And besides, I fell in love with Tobirama when he raised one finger and forced Sasuke to rethink all his questionable life decisions. Younger Senju needs a little bit of love, but he will get some more decent, well-deserved ass-kicking too. 
> 
> Enjoy!

Making one's sense of happiness dependent on another human carries the risk of a grave disappointment in the long run. One of the Academy students, blinded by her affection towards one of her classmates, certainly had no idea about this. If that were the case, she would not have developed her whole identity basing on her childish infatuation. Part of his charm was in his apparent maturity, which turned out to be a sign of his trauma. An era of relative peace did not protect him from experiencing a devastating loss. At just seven years old, Sasuke Uchiha has lost all his loved ones and had to grow up quickly. His sorrowful gaze, reticence and his tendency to remain alone have been a manifestation of him being traumatized. Sasuke carried the weight of horrifying memories. However, Sakura was not to blame for worshipping his silent cries for help - she lacked the worldly wisdom, which came with experience and age. Superficial, childlike reasoning has not let her consider the possibility that this unusual personality structure of her love interest could have been something unnatural and unwelcome.

For some reason, Sakura's above-average intellect and ability to fully comprehend complicated concepts did not apply to the emotional aspects of her life for quite some time. She perfectly handled all the topics covered in the Academy and had no problems with putting them into practice, but understanding the needs of other people was impossible. Her peers' mistreatment during childhood took away her opportunity to develop proper relationships at the appropriate time. Maybe it was bound to happen - a little girl who has lived in a world of her own would grow to be a girl attached to her fantasies. A dozen or so years later Sakura will wonder if her natural genjutsu affinity is somehow connected to this. Creating her reality became a habit.

Contrary to appearances, Sakura realised quite early that she had been assigned to Team Seven as a filler without special skills. She became aware of this fact after comparing their teacher’s attitude towards her with that of the other team members. Despite this knowledge, she always sent a false smile Kakashi’s way when he threw her a scrape of praise, usually a few weeks overdue. She had respect for the _jōnin_ who was watching over her team, which didn't prevent her from concluding that her sensei was essentially useless. The young kunoichi took the right path for wrong reasons - she asked for help from other experienced ninjas not to fall behind Sasuke. Her first teacher, Iruka Umino, referred her to Kurenai Yūhi so that she could develop her skills in illusion techniques. As a hand-to-hand combat teacher, he recommended Maito Gai; Iruka could not deny him the masterly level of taijutsu, but the peculiar personality of the Green Beast of Konoha was sometimes a bit baffling. Just in case, he warned Sakura several times about this eccentric person. As for the element-based ninjutsu, Haruno decided to explore the rich resources of the Konoha library on her own.

* * *

Mastering _Magen_ , the art of demonic illusion, was by no means an easy task. Kurenai decided to give Sakura a training identical to that she had undergone years before. The instinctive ability to sense genjutsu was not enough to reach an expert level. In the beginning, the shortcomings of Kurenai's illusions deliberately remained obvious - rain that did not make the ground wet, snow that fell despite the heat or trees staying still despite the wind. However, the level of difficulty grew rapidly; soon Sakura had to identify a plant species not found in the Fire Nation, recognize the sound of leaves falling to the ground as too loud, a slightly altered shade of grass or the unnatural location of the shadow of one of the stakes on the training ground. It took several months before Yūhi decided that her pupil was ready to learn sabotage and offensive illusions. Due to the average level of her chakra, the young kunoichi had to master the reasonable use of these resources to balance the power of the technique and the amount of energy it absorbed. Kurenai was a demanding but great teacher and her support allowed Sakura to unlock some of the potential neglected in the Academy.

The members of Team Eight turned out to be fantastic people. Shy Hinata and calm, analytical Shino balanced with their temperaments Kiby's fiery personality, so characteristic of the Inuzuka clan. When Sakura watched them during their training, she was under the impression that they were learning to cooperate from birth. Their techniques complemented each other perfectly, and the role of Kurenai-sensei was delicate management, not firm orders. A sad reflection circulated in her mind as she watched the three young ninjas: Team Seven probably had no chance of achieving similar dynamics. As soon as they took a break from exercising, Sakura scratched the tired Akamaru behind his ear, briefly said goodbye to her old colleagues from the Academy, respectfully bowed to Kurenai and left. The training with Kakashi was supposed to start three hours earlier, so she estimated that she still had a dozen or so minutes to get there. At least she knew that she was not the only one experiencing neglect on the part of their teacher, so she went to greet her educational companions in an agreed place. They never asked the reason for her absence, so she did not try to explain herself if there was no need for it.

During her first exercises with Maito Gai, Sakura developed bruises in places she had no idea could be injured. She was also frightened by the fact that the man did not use even a quarter of his strength. Young Haruno was certain that a brief moment of distraction on his part would have sent her at least to hospital, and most probably to a wheelchair or a grave. She had not even dreamt of being as good as the Green Beast of Konoha, and she considered the concept of opening the inner gates to be unattainable, but she mastered sufficient grounds for taijutsu not to be ashamed of her hand-to-hand combat skills. Gai was somewhat disappointed when she refused to wear the green suit even after being - in his opinion charmingly - persuaded by his disciple, Lee ('this colour will highlight the colour of your eyes, Sakura-chan!'). After a few months, apart from the resentment to the word 'youth' and the surprising bond with Maito Gai, she also brought out of this training a slightly more athletic silhouette, a noticeably higher speed (although incomparable to that of Rock Lee even before his weights were taken off) and, above all, quite a taijutsu. She missed a lot to face more experienced opponents, but at least she was sure that in case of such a clash she would be able to stay against them for at least a few minutes. 

Among Gai's pupils, Neji has caught Sakura's attention the most. His regal presence and arrogant attitude matched her previous image of the Hyūga clan and at the same time contrasted with what she knew about Hinata. If it were not for their impossible to miss _kekkei genkai_ , Sakura could have sworn that Hinata was not related to Neji. The young man, despite his evident reluctance to identify himself with the group, was able to adapt his fighting style to the needs of his comrades. Haruno wondered whether such a thing would be possible with Naruto and Sasuke, but rejected this idea almost immediately. She expressed her admiration for the way Tenten wielded ninja tools, praised Lee's legendary hand-to-hand combat skills and nodded towards Neji, which she thought was better than risking misunderstanding on his part and offending him.

* * *

The man looking after the library resources first raised his eyebrows when a tiny, pink-haired girl shyly asked him where she would find material on earth and water element techniques, but without saying a word, he pointed out the appropriate shelves to her. He was not a ninja himself, but he heard enough stories to believe that a person with such a gentle appearance could be a kunoichi. The legendary Tsunade or Red Hot-Blooded Habanero were leading examples with their wild temperament and soothing appearance. Seeing how carefully Sakura studies the scrolls, he often left the library open for a few hours after the planned end of the workday. The librarian got used to the presence of that young kunoichi to such an extent that he started taking an extra portion of food with him to work and left it on the table next to her with a cup of hot tea without a word. When one morning he noticed the frustration written on her face as clear as a day, he decided to react. 

"Can I help you with something?" he said, sending her a warm, reassuring smile. "While I am not a ninja, I know a thing or two. I do not spend time among all these books for nothing."

"I am capable of using two chakra natures: water and earth," Sakura started explaining without raising her head from the scroll; the librarian admired her divisive attention. 'Using the earth in combat is not in any way problematic, because there is plenty of it everywhere, but what about water? Is it at all possible to use it where there is no water? After all, I will not kindly ask the enemy to fight elsewhere! I've been thinking about this for months now!"

"The second Hokage brought his legendary Water Release to perfection," said the man after a moment of reflection, and Sakura immediately looked at him with hope, her eyes wide open. "He was able to use it even where there was not a single drop of water. One would think that he was plucking it from the air. Nidaime-sama was a sensei of our current Hokage, so Sarutobi-sama certainly has access to his notes."

The prospect of talking to the most powerful ninja in the village to ask him for access to something as valuable and carefully guarded as his teacher's notes was something infinitely stressful for young Sakura. Therefore, she decided to analyse the problem herself. She felt that the solution was something obvious that had not yet come to her mind. She thanked the librarian for his inquiry and returned to analysing the technique written on the scroll.

_Ox, monkey, hare..._

After all, Suiryūdan no Jutsu - Water Dragon Bullet Technique that she saw Kakashi Hatake perform - was created in the presence of a water source. Even her sensei, the Copy Ninja, could not do such a thing. Perhaps the stories about the second Hokage were exaggerated. 

_Ox, monkey, hare, rat, boar, bird..._

She found it ironic that the master of _Suiton_ was a member of a forest clan. Just how in the world could you pluck water from the air?

_Ox, monkey, hare, rat, boar, bird, ox, horse, bird..._

Suddenly Sakura straightened up, almost knocking a cup of cold tea down on the floor. That was it. Plucking water _from the air_. The condensation of water must have been the key to solving this problem.

"Thank you, Hiroto-san!" kunoichi shouted and without explaining the reasons for her sudden gratitude ran out of the library, leaving the scroll open on the table.

A surprised library worker twisted his head and put the materials in their place. Someone with such a work ethic like this Haruno had could be forgiven for this little mistake.

* * *

Kakashi Hatake saw the progress his student was making outside training hours under his supervision. He did not express his approval and recognition only due to his shame; he knew that he was in no way responsible for her success. Close to perfection chakra control, a growing arsenal of illusions, the development of a hand-to-hand combat style, and some simple but useful Suiton and Doton techniques - Kakashi observed all of this and yet did not congratulate Sakura, did not ruffle her hair in a warm gesture, did not pat her shoulder or even flash her his characteristic smile from behind the mask. Hatake added 'useless sensei' right after 'useless friend' and 'useless son' to the list of elements of his identity with bitter disappointment. He was sure that Sakura would point out to him every day that her potential was wasted by him and she would be right.

Her discovery of the secret to manipulating water without any of it nearby surprised Kakashi the most. Haruno could not yet produce enough of it to use any Suiton technique. In fact, she could only create a few drops of water. Nevertheless, her solution to the mystery was impressive. Her sensei felt both satisfaction and shame. He wanted to help her, he really wanted to, but he knew that he had waited too long. After all, a year and a half without any support from his side had passed. 

"I am proud of you, Sakura," he said, but her answers in the form of a nod and a smile that could not reach her eyes proved to Kakashi how late he was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> edited 23/02/2021


	2. average jokes, awkward apologies

Kakashi was sitting under one of the trees in Konoha, holding his nose in his inseparable book, but, immersed in his thoughts, he had not turned a single page in an hour. All three of his students left him to independently train with the three legendary ninjas. The son of the White Fang sometimes passed Sakura on the paths of the village, but she always rushed somewhere, too focused on something to pay attention to her former teacher. Nevertheless, he always raised his hand in a greeting gesture; a single moment of humiliation was not comparable to the years of underestimation he had given to his favourite pupil. Favourite, because she was the only one who had to earn her position without the demon chakra or any kekkei genkai, and she did it excellently. Since she started training with the Fifth Hokage, Kakashi no longer saw her as an infatuated girl with insecurities, but as a strong ninja with determination and confidence written on her face. Sakura abandoned the bright red clothing for practical black shirts and trousers. She also started to tie her hair into a neat ponytail. As she grew older, she became calmer and more introverted. Kakashi did not doubt that Sakura could one day surpass Tsunade herself. 

Again, he was unable to verbally express his admiration when in a few seconds she put on a professional mask of detachment and proceeded to remove an unknown poison from Kankuro’s body. She ended up in a Bingo Book a few weeks after Sasori of Red Sand died by her hand. It was a sad day for Kakashi; although he knew it would happen sooner or later, he would have preferred Sakura to remain the shy girl she was in the past. He simply did not want her to bear the burden of the prize set for her head. However, the white-haired jōnin felt that over time this amount would only increase and it would not be possible to stop this process, let alone reverse it. He began to see himself in the former disciple and desperately clung to every manifestation of her juvenile temperament to get rid of that impression. However, as she grew older, she began to resemble Tsunade, a sensible and professional woman, though capable of falling into a murderous frenzy. Kakashi only got his first chance to have a normal conversation with her on a hospital bed after his Mangekyō Sharingan's abuse. It was then that he noticed a gentle outline of purple rhombus on her forehead.

"If you start wearing two ponytails, I will have to assume that Tsunade replaced our Sakura with a clone," he joked poorly while Haruno introduced a needle-thin chakra stream into his eye socket. "This is not medical chakra. What are you doing?"

"Looking for the cause of the deterioration in your eyesight," she replied and Kakashi did not miss how she rolled her eyes when she heard his pathetic excuse of a joke; it was the Sakura he knew. "From the notes of Nidaime-sama and Tsunade-shishō, it appears that the standard Sharingan is created by bringing to the eye of a chakra through a channel that does not usually occur in humans. That's the simplified explanation. Mangekyō Sharingan presumably has a similar mechanism of activation, but Uchiha during the Age of the Warring States have sealed their eyes so that they self-destruct in case of death or attempted removal."

After a moment of gentle manoeuvring of the chakra, Sakura turned her hand back rapidly. 

"What the... There's the same seal on your eye," she said and her furrowed eyebrows indicated her frustration. "I will look into the files on the Uchiha clan massacre and look for references to it. Perhaps I can also find patient records in the archives."

"You have grown into a great kunoichi, Sakura," he suddenly spoke and his former student turned away. "I always knew you had potential, but-"

"So you did know?" she snorted amusedly and it nevertheless pleased Kakashi, who preferred a mockery to three years of silence. "I somehow failed to notice this."

"I know where you are going with this, but you could have asked for help," Kakashi replied a bit too defensively, even though he was the one to start this topic. "You didn't have to look for other teachers on your own."

"Did you expect me to ask you to do your job?" she asked mockingly and Kakashi had to admit: she had a good point. "You are a kind man and an exceptional warrior, Kakashi. Still, you have disappointed me as a sensei and I wonder why. You said it yourself: I have a natural affinity for illusions. Sharingan is a supreme tool for genjutsu, so why couldn't you use it for me? Why did you ignore the fact that I have two chakra natures and I need damn help to master them? I could have become a useless kunoichi if I had not found support from other jōnins."

"I apologize," the sincere regret in Kakashi's voice somewhat eased the anger of the medic, but she still could not look him in the eye. "You no longer need me nor my help, I know. But I will teach you everything I know if you wish so. I will do it, but Sakura, do not ignore me again. Please."

"I don't want to lose another person because of my own stupidity," he thought.

"When you get back in shape, we will see each other every two days at five in the morning," she announced and her sharp voice did not overwhelm the relief Kakashi felt. "No idiotic excuses and no perverted books. If you are even one minute late, I will break all your limbs, put you in front of the gate as a scarecrow and-"

"This time I will not let you down, Sakura," interrupted Hatake, clearly uncomfortable.

"You wouldn't dare", she murmured threateningly.

* * *

Reconstructing trust has never been an easy process, but in the world of shinobi, it was twice as much challenging. How could you rely on the battlefield on someone who has already betrayed you once in your private life? Can you blame someone for reasonable uncertainty? How can you force yourself to ignore the likelihood of being abandoned? Sakura saw unfairness in her excessive caution towards Kakashi and, at the same time, wanted some evidence of his desire to change. She had, in fact, a different, less obvious objective.

* * *

To her surprise, Sakura noticed her teacher leaning against the Konoha gate a quarter of an hour ahead of schedule. Frankly, she did not expect him so early, but she was pleased that he took her words seriously. She immediately noticed signs of uncertainty in his attitude. He was shifting from foot to foot and constantly looking around. Kunoichi did not want to prolong his obvious discomfort and started to march quicker.

"Kakashi!" she waved her hand to pick his attention and it did not escape her attention how his shoulders immediately loosened, but she decided not to raise the subject yet. 

"I am glad you came," he stated simply; Haruno was able to recognise whether his one-eyed smile was false or not, but the one accompanying these words was honest. 

A few months earlier Sakura, having promised full discretion, received access to Hatake's files from Tsunade. It was one of the thickest folders in the entire archive of modern Konoha's history, but the content of these records came as a real surprise. Although kunoichi was aware that her teacher was practically raised in the war, the story of his father's suicide and his nickname Nakamagoroshi no Kakashishocked her. She had to split up the examination of some of his reports into several sessions. From the outside, it would seem that Hatake is surprisingly good at dealing with the trauma, but a skilful eye could have seen the burden on his shoulders. Having delved into psychological publications, Sakura began to understand Sasuke too. The fifth Hokage firmly refused to let her see the information about him and Naruto, explaining this with a too personal approach to their case, but Sakura was difficult to fool. Nevertheless, she respected her master's decision and did not try to persuade her. The young medic prepared herself to start working with Kakashi's problems for weeks. She could not reveal her motives prematurely, so she decided to behave ordinarily so as not to arouse his suspicion. Nevertheless, she regretted her words from the moment she saw sadness and fear of another loss in his eyes. Although he let her down as a teacher, he was never a poor friend to her, and yet she ignored him for several years without giving him a chance to apologise. She considered it the absolute least she could do for him to try to treat his evident post-traumatic stress disorder.

"Is there anything you would like to start with?" he inquired when they arrived at the training field.

"With the coffee," she answered, took the thermos out of her bag and filled two cups with its contents. "Don't worry, it's unsweetened."

"This is not what I expected, but I cannot complain," Kakashi sat on the ground and leaned against the tree, carefully sipping the hot drink. "If you are going to start every training session this way, I will get up even earlier."

"Lack of sleep is definitely not helpful to the regeneration of the body and you just came out from the hospital," she spoke with a sweet smile. "If you come here exhausted, I'll beat your ass into a coma."

"Duly noted," he stated and another smile appeared on his face, but disappeared almost immediately. "I've missed you, Sakura, you know? Tell me, how are you holding up?"

"I have a lot of work to do thanks to the shinobi, who apparently adore hospital beds because they end up here regularly," she replied, deliberately leaving out the emotional aspects of her life. "There is one jōnin who claims he hates hospitals, yet after every mission, he spends a few days here. You may know him. He has his silver hair and masked face."

"Wow, what an idiot," he responded, pretending to be astounded. "He must be truly insane to expose himself to the wrath of the Iron Fist of Konoha. Pink hair, rather short, can't miss her."

"The Iron Fist of Konoha, huh? Bingo Book is sometimes poetic," Sakura chuckled, but there was no amusement in her laughter. 

"I would gladly exchange Friend-Killer Kakashi for a title of an Iron Fist of Konoha. Maybe Tsunade will accept a bribe in the form of a bottle of good sake to change this," he stated plainly and kunoichi almost let a mug out of her hand. "I know that you have read my file and I do not mind it, so don't worry."

"Have you told anyone about this?", she asked; since Kakashi already knew, it was no use beating around the bush. "That one report is not enough. It is not the same as having an actual conversation."

"Sakura, you may not know it yet, but death and loss are natural in the shinobi world," he replied and his voice has taken a sharper tone. "It's none of your concern how I cope with it, so stop trying to fix something you do not know a single thing about."

'You are not coping, that's the problem' - that was what she wanted to say, but she bit her tongue. 

"I will not leave you alone, however hard you try to push me away," she argued and the words that actually came out of her mouth touched Kakashi. "Shinobi are not only tools but also people. You cannot treat yourself as a killing machine and deny yourself the right to suffer."

There was silence for several seconds. Finally, Hatake looked into the emerald eyes of his former pupil, now a strong kunoichi, who certainly had the potential to become a jōnin. He did not doubt the sincerity of her intentions, and there was something selfish inside him that was glad that someone was finally worried about him. He tried to suppress this feeling - in vain.

"That means a lot to me, Sakura. Thank you," he whispered and closed his eyes. "I can't promise you that I will tell you all about it, but I will consider it."

He knew instinctively that this moment of vulnerability he allowed himself to have would remain between them. Haruno was no longer pressing on the subject, which he was relieved to hear. Kakashi was a little afraid that she would be overly cautious during the fight for the sake of pity, but he rejected this thought when he had to escape Tsūtenkyaku - an attack with her heel loaded with chakra. He congratulated himself on his speed of reaction when he saw a giant crater where he had stood a second earlier. 

"Doton: Doryūheki!'" he exclaimed and quickly raised a wall of the earth with his chakra as Sakura moved towards him.

He jumped away, but the monstrous power of the young woman blew the wall to dust in an instant. Kakashi was ashamed to recognise the influence of Gai's fighting style in his student's taijutsu. He remembered it over the years of training with his rival, so he was able to predict all her movements without using Sharingan. Unexpectedly, Sakura jumped towards him with her chakra-infused fist; it was only when he jumped away from her path that he realized he was not her target. The opponent melted into a puddle of mud, and its counterpart emerged from the split ground and with a surgical precision cut one of the muscles of Kakashi's thigh with a chakra blade. The woman, however, growled with disappointment when instead of kneeling after the damage done to his musculus rectus femoris, the man turned out to be a clone. 

"You almost succeeded, Sakura-chan," announced Kakashi and Sakura felt a cold kunai on her neck. "Doton: Kage Bunshin? A good trick, but with your limited chakra you should leave it for the finishing blow."

"Shannaro!" yelled Sakura; it was too late for Kakashi to move away and a split second later he had a blade on his throat. "Systematic exercises increase the volume of the chakra, sensei."

"I would praise you, but first of all... my ribs... I don't think I can breathe anymore," mumbled Hatake and Sakura immediately threw the weapon aside to start her treatment.

Before she could activate the Mystical Palm technique, something heavy appeared on her back. It was the whole pack of Kakashi's ninken.

"I should have guessed that little performance of yours was too dramatic to be true," Sakura murmured, disappointed with her gullibility. "Hatake! If you do not take your dogs off me within five seconds-"

"...then we will both be strangled," to her surprise, the Kakashi lying underneath her was the real one. "This time my ribs really may break. Oi, Bull! You will kill me! You will murder your owner!"

The ninken immediately moved to the grass, Kakashi took out a few broken treats from his pocket and gave them to his summons. As if nothing ever happened, he started scratching his pets behind their ears and calling them 'good boys'. Sakura, meanwhile, felt her eyelid tremble.

"What were you thinking, Hatake?!" she growled barely refraining from hitting her sensei. "Don't tell the medic that you can't breathe when it's not true! It was not fair. You recently left the hospital, so no wonder I believed you!"

"We have never set the rules," the jōnin answered and the fact that he made a good point only deepened the anger of kunoichi. "Next time, tell me earlier that I cannot use my perfect acting skills."

Despite all the anger that Sakura felt, she realized how much she missed her teacher's pathetic jokes. The attempt to repair the relationship, which was his initiative, also pleased her. Although she had missed a crucial stage in building the relationship with her sensei, she saw some advantages. This gave her a chance to build an equal relationship. Perhaps this was the key to helping Kakashi and pulling him out of the spiral of sadness he had tangled himself in? Hatake was pretty late with his apologies, that was a fact. Then again, is there anyone who was not lost on the road of life at least once?

"Let's get back to our training, shall we?" stated Kakashi with a smile and Sakura could not help but smile back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> edited 23/02/2021


	3. a friendship that grew out of resentment

Although Kakashi undoubtedly helped Sakura to expand her arsenal of techniques, she preferred to use her hands to protect life rather than take it away. Haruno was a strong kunoichi capable of quick murder, but her main strength was in healing. Hatake could not help but admire every time he was able to observe his former pupil focused on saving hopeless cases. With a sweet smile, she forced the stubborn ninjas who claimed they were holding on well and did not need treatment to cooperate. Sometimes those less experienced shinobi left her office in perfect health, but with pale faces. The Iron Fist of Konoha was a kunoichi to the same extent as she was a medic and for this, she was loved by her patients - the battling ninjas felt better under the care of someone who knew the reality of their work. The muscular shoulders of the young woman have already moved hundreds of half-conscious shinobi to the operating table, and her deceptively delicate hands have saved even more people. 

At times Hatake wondered if he was not just another case to be rescued. It had been a while since their first and only conversation about his mental state, but out of the corner of his eye, he saw her worried stares from time to time. Her involvement in the issue of the seal on his eye also spoke in favour of his suspicion. She sometimes appeared at their morning training sessions with notes almost falling out of the bag and forbade him to look through them under the threat of breaking his arm. Thanks to these meetings he felt less lonely and useless, but something treacherous in his heart made him doubt Sakura's intentions. He did not want to be a burden for her; she had enough worries and. That is why he decided one day just not to come to training without any explanation. He knew that Sakura would be upset, but he convinced himself that it would be all the better for her. He was not sure whether it would be good for him though. In fact, he was sure that his well-being would suffer greatly from his decision. In his imagination, he saw Sakura waiting for him with hot coffee. The morning was chilly, so she was probably wearing something warmer. She would probably have scolded him for the outfit not suitable for the weather. He would have smiled sorry and then they would have started training. Then he would return to his dark quarters and lie down on an unmade bed for Kami knows how long. Maybe he would have eaten a meal and taken a shower or maybe not. Kakashi was not a sad man. He was tired of his life, buried in the past and overburdened with his guilt. 

  
He should have expected Sakura not to leave him alone, but the reprimanding look of her emerald eyes looking at him from behind the window surprised him. Contrary to his decision to unburden Sakura, he opened the window and let her in. To his surprise, she did not yell at him. It took him a few seconds to register the fact that he had just been hugged. He awkwardly reciprocated the embrace.

"Hatake Kakashi, don’t you dare make me worried like this again," she whispered and he felt like an idiot. "What were you thinking? Did you think I would just leave you like this? That I would not start looking for you?"

"There is a lot of work in the hospital and fixing your trainwreck of a sensei seemed like an unnecessary addition to me," he replied honestly and she looked at him, her eyes wide. 

"You are not my sensei, Kakashi," Sakura said and before he could feel hurt, she continued. "I consider you a friend and a comrade."

  
She stepped away from Kakashi to take out two boxes of take-out food from her bag and give them to him. He was infinitely grateful to her for all her kindness and the sense of normality she had provided him for some time. Someone probably would maliciously suggest that Kakashi sees Rin in Sakura, but it could not be farther from the truth. Sakura saw him as an ordinary man and a friend. Kakashi saw the same thing in her. Despite her young age, she was able to understand his problems. Her wisdom was ahead of her experience. Even though Gai was close to him, he could not get a grip on Kakashi's problems. Physical activity was his coping mechanism, but this solution did not fit Hatake at all. 

  
"Do you have a table here? I’m not exactly a fan of drinking coffee standing up," she asked and he showed her the correct way.

  
They sat together at the table and ate miso soup with eggplant in silence. The fact that Sakura brought his favourite dish did not escape his attention. Although she liked sweets herself, she never sweetened the coffee she brought to training because he hated sugar. They had no ties as a student and teacher, but Sakura saw these details about him and remembered them. She was quite observant.

"Spending time with you is the best thing that has happened to me recently. Thank you, Sakura," he mumbled after he finished his meal, embarrassed by his moment of emotional vulnerability. 

"Likewise," she replied with a genuine smile. "I can now understand why Gai is so fond of you. You know, I’m actually glad that you are not used to being my teacher. I feel like your friend, not a student, former or not."

"This does not change the fact that I have failed," he responded despite her protests. "Nevertheless, I can see what you mean. I do not see any way for me to stop seeing Naruto and Sasuke as students.’

"I am sorry it took me so long to understand you," she added after a while. "I should have been more considerate."

"It’s not your fault I’m fucked up," he snorted amusedly. "Besides, you couldn’t have known back then."

"Okay, I’m by no means saying you smell, but you should take a shower," Sakura stated and got up from the chair. "It will make you feel better because right now you look like shit."

"So mean," he whined in mock hurt. "But you’re right, It’ll probably do me some good."

  
Kakashi guessed that the sudden change of subject was supposed to protect him from a deterioration in his mood, but that was unlikely at the moment. The presence of Sakura made him feel better. Although he was almost twice as old as her, he perceived her as a soulmate. Both her chakra and her personality had healing qualities. It is risky to base your happiness on someone else's support and Sakura knew it well, but Kakashi did not want to think about the consequences. He desperately sought out anything that could have helped him, although he would never admit it out loud. In the shinobi world, every moment of joy was fleeting, but if a friendship with a young medic could give him at least a second of happiness, he was ready to suffer because of it in the future. As selfish as it may have been.

A silly idea came to his mind when he came out of the hot shower. He smirked to himself when he hurriedly wiped his body and dressed up. His face was a secret guarded more than the village's forbidden techniques. A casual reveal of his features would be hilarious in his opinion. Years ago he forgave his father when he understood his motives. These days, wearing a mask was a matter of habit, not an attempt to hide the resemblance to his parent. The mask also allowed him to hide his true emotions. He considered revealing his face to Sakura not only a humorous gesture but also a serious act. Haruno was surprisingly quick to overcome the walls that he had built around him. Kakashi decided that taking the mask off in front of her would be an expression of the trust he placed in her. The man left his bathroom, having made the final decision.

  
"Sakura, I have something to show you," he announced, gaining her attention.

Sakura could not refrain from opening her mouth in surprise when her friend touched the edge of his mask. 

"Wait!" she exclaimed and it was his turn to be confused. "Are you sure about this? Don’t do anything that you will regret. I can wait. You could never show me your face and I’d respect that."

"I trust you, Sakura," he replied, although he was touched by her consideration.

  
A split second later, the mask was gone. 

"You... you have a mole," she stated dumbly. "Can I touch your face to be sure you’re not pranking me or something?"

"Go ahead," he shrugged.

‘You have had a broken nose in the past. Judging by its shape, you never looked for medical help," she said after a moment of the examination. "They say that a woman's beauty can be deadly, but look at yourself."

"Are you saying I'm good-looking?" he asked jokingly.

"I’m not ashamed to say you’re a beautiful man, Kakashi," she declared with no shade of embarrassment. "And I’m honoured you trust me enough to show me your face."

  
Truth be told, she found him extremely handsome and weren’t it for her emotional maturity, she’d probably join the circle of his fangirls. However, as a medic, she learned how to overlook the physical aspects of the human body. She was able to appreciate the perfect structure of his face, but that was all. Kakashi was still the same Kakashi he was before he took the mask off. Her balanced response reassured Hatake that he made a good move. Now he was also certain that Sakura was the most grown-up of his three students. There was no romantic subtext in the actions of either of the two. Kakashi had not previously thought about the possibility that a young woman might have infatuated herself with a mysterious man - after all, she loved an Uchiha for a long time. That would certainly be a problem and he was glad Sakura matured. Come to think of it, he had the impression that her childish fascination with that boy vanished. He would hate it for her to have her heart broken. While putting duty before feelings sounded cruel, it was a strategy that prevented disappointments and suffering. 

"I hope you did not expect a different reaction," she said and eyed him suspiciously. "Kami knows what you read in your perverted books."

  
After a few seconds, they both burst out laughing. The life of a ninja was not easy, but that did not mean that the shinobi did not deserve a moment's joy. Denying oneself the right to make friends was the easiest way to burn out. Even those who could boast of their professionalism took time off to rest and maintain relationships. Kakashi was not a fan of socializing, but he could not deny that friendship turned out to be an essential support for him. Shinobi were the tools of the villages, but above all they were people.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> edited 23/02/2021


	4. ghosts of the past and ghosts of the present

Hokage’s office reeked of sake. Only years of practice have saved Tsunade from alcohol poisoning. Far too much has happened in recent times. Her apprentice appeared in the Bingo Book. Danzō pushed his blood-stained hands into her decision about the composition of the team that was to capture Akatsuki's spy that turned out to be a henchman of Orochimaru. Sakura was experiencing a crisis of self-esteem; despite all her hard work, she could not fight on the same level as the legendary fugitive ninja and the raging jinchūriki. The former Team Seven finally found Sasuke, but it was by no means a joyful reunion - Uchiha attacked his former comrades, Yamato and Sai. If it had not been for Kakashi, whom she reluctantly sent on this mission as a second jōnin, at least one of them could have ended up dead. The worst thing, however, was the news of the death of Asuma Sarutobi. This young man had the whole future before him. He was planning to marry Kurenai and they already had a child on the way. However, there was no constant in the ninja world. Death was lurking nearby in broad daylight. It was to be expected, yet no one was able to accept that. This brave, honourable man lost his life too prematurely and too unexpectedly. 

Sakura did not have any personal contact with Asuma, but the general atmosphere of grief affected her. She did not know whether she was crying out of sadness or was it smoke that caused the tears to fall. Dozens of candles were burning to commemorate the deceased Sarutobi. The powerful speech of the Fifth Hokage moved Sakura. She spoke of the Will of Fire, of Hashirama's legacy, of honourable death and sacrifice. Kurenai cried in despair, her eyes redder than ever because of tears shed. Shikamaru held his teacher's beloved one firmly to stop her from doing something stupid yet understandable. Sakura's gaze went towards Kakashi, who was standing in the last row. The deeply distracted man hardly noticed when she approached him.

"I’m by your side, Kakashi," she whispered faintly. "Whatever happens, I’m with you."

Hatake did not answer her, but put his hand on her shoulder and did not take it off until the end of the ceremony. From the outside, he seemed calm, but there was a storm in his mind. He wondered if he could somehow prevent the premature death of his former classmate. Kakashi closed his eyes to stop thinking about Obito's body crushed by the rocks. The metallic smell of blood and a terrifying gift - the secret of the Uchiha clan. Wide-open eyes of Rin and her pulsating heart in his hand. Justifiable hateful looks from her parents. But there was also Sakura. More powerful than anyone could have foreseen. Her soothing chakra. Her gentle smile. Sakura with Sasuke's hand piercing her chest. Sakura stabbed by Sasori's poisoned blade. Sakura's arm torn apart by demon's claws. Sakura’s cold grave.

"Kakashi, calm down," she spoke softly. "I’m here."

Sakura was alive and well. Kakashi could feel the gentle warmth of her healing chakra. He realized that he had pierced the skin of his palm with his fingernails. She was fixing those meaningless injuries in a meaningful gesture. He found himself pathetic. It was him who should have been supporting her, not the other way around. However, the shinobi world was bizarre. Children brought up in war could not be functional adults. Kakashi hoped that the new generation would never have to face such conflicts. His fear of loss was fully justified. He knew Sakura understood him and was nevertheless ashamed. She assured him he was by no means a burden to her, but it did not make him stop feeling like one. Sakura was a fantastic kunoichi with prospects for a brilliant medical career. And there was Kakashi: exhausted, lonely, with his mental stability destroyed by ANBU. The tattoo on his arm was an unwanted reminder of the pain he had caused others and felt himself. In the worst period of his life, he cried in the shower, trying in vain to remove this cursed red ink. He cried and cried and scratched his skin till it bled. He wanted this tattoo to vanish completely. He wanted his whole self to disappear without a trace.

Kakashi should have listened to Sakura and not shown her his face. He did not regret the act itself, but its consequences. Now kunoichi knew he trusted her more than anyone else and felt obliged to help him. He was no stranger to the idea of pure friendship, but he did not allow himself the possibility of someone wanting to give it to him. _Yes, that has to be it. I forced her to help this pathetic excuse of a human being. I cannot break off contact because she’ll be worried about me. If I don't do it, I’ll make her miserable with my problems. Kakashi Hatake, you screwed up again._ He wanted to run away and to stay simultaneously. He wanted to be alone. At the same time, he did not. That desire to flee was natural for him, but Sakura has made a difference. Now he no longer knew what to do. At the moment, he wanted to retreat to that pitiful burrow he called home and stare dully at the ceiling. Perhaps he could cry a bit in private. It has been a long time since he cried. He preferred to bottle up his emotions, but it looked like they needed some outlet. Hatake felt like a moth trapped in a glass. He wanted to escape but did not know where and how. His instinct tried to force him to move away. _Please. Stop this madness. I want to go. I want to be alone. Don’t leave me. Please. Go away._ He felt his hands shaking. His whole body was shaking. Sakura's warm hand caught his. _Don't let go of my hand._

When the funeral was over, Sakura took him to his apartment, not even for a moment letting go of his hand. Did she hear his silent pleas or did he unconsciously speak out loud? He was not sure. All he was sure of was her presence and how grateful he was to her. Gai was a great friend, but delicate issues were not his forte. If Obito were alive, he would probably laugh at Kakashi before he understood the matter was serious. Rin would probably panic, seeing the uncharacteristic behaviour of her teammate. Asuma may have patted him on the shoulder, not knowing what to say. Minato would offer him a life tip that Kakashi would only appreciate when he regained stability. Perhaps Iruka would be able to offer Kakashi a meaningful level of support, but it was Sakura who noticed his discomfort and decided to help him.

"I am sorry, Sakura," he murmured. "I am sorry that you had to see me like this."

"The founders of Konoha wanted children to no longer have to witness wars, but that is probably unrealistic. I would like to improve psychological care in the village in future," she stated, still gently holding his hand. ‘I wish you didn’t have to go through all that."

On that day, a desire to change the past arose in Sakura's mind. Her natural determination and curiosity made her explore the intriguing concept of space-time techniques. They were uncommon and hard to master, but they existed. The extensive resources of the Konoha library could perhaps help her again. But this was not the right time to consider the matter further. Right now she had to make sure that Kakashi was stable enough to leave him alone for a while. Judging by his appearance, this man desperately needed a decent dinner.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> edited 23/02/2021


	5. more than we signed up for

"Why did you forgive me?"

"What?"

Sakura never thought she would hear such a question, especially not from Kakashi. Yet it made sense. Only a person who truly regrets their actions would want to know the reason why they were forgiven. He was entitled to ask. But why now, when her emerald chakra was putting his skull back together? Tsunade would give her a hard time if she saw her prioritising Kakashi over civilians. But she promised him that she would never leave him. Not now that the village was in ruins and her _shishō_ fell into a coma, trying to protect everyone. 

"Can you tell I was dead for a while?" he asked weakly. "I met my father. Or maybe it was a hallucination?"

"Kakashi Hatake, you’re such an idiot," she mumbled through tears. "Of course, I can tell. I have just finished reversing the damage done to your frontal lobe. Not even you would have survived this, wasn't it for The Fifth."

"Fortunately, you’re here, Sakura," Kakashi whispered faintly and for a second, Sakura was scared she was losing him. "Don’t look at me with such sad eyes. I’ve been through worse and I’ll live, so stop crying, okay?"

"I forgave you because I finally understood you," she said. "Naruto and Sasuke were more prioritised because they were far more dangerous. The Third Hokage was right: Sasuke proved to be a threat and even your guidance didn’t prevent him from betraying Konoha."

Sakura's heart was breaking into pieces. Among the victims were her parents. It has been a long time since she had the opportunity to talk to them. They broke contact with her as she continued on the path of the ninja. Her mother expected Sakura to give up after her first mission. Although their last conversation was a heated argument, her suffering was by no means easier to bear. Many great ninjas lost their lives that day. Shizune could not be saved. After Pain pulled her soul out of her body, she became an empty shell. All attempts to heal her were futile. The medic thought she would also lose Kakashi, so how could she force herself not to cry? Once she was satisfied with how she had patched up all his injuries, her hands started shaking. Suddenly, she clenched her fists and the look on her face changed. The professional mask of detachment has returned. She picked up Kakashi and carried him to a secure place on her back. The woman helped to search the ruins for survivors and healed all the injured she could. There were more victims than previously thought. _Will the Konoha cemetery accommodate them all?_ When Naruto claimed at the very end Nagato accepted his position, Sakura could not stand his positive attitude. She punched him harder than she planned. The doctor has just attacked a hero, but no one has dared to criticise her behaviour. Perhaps it was because the majority shared her opinion. There was no room for naïve thinking in the ninja world. How can you talk about victory while standing among hundreds of dead bodies? Stopping the cycle of hatred and believing in a better tomorrow sounded pathetic in the face of this tragedy.

The blonde ninja hair seemed to have finally understood the gravity of the situation. He did everything he could to stop Pain from completely razing the village to the ground. However, despite all his efforts, he could not bring the victims back to life. Everyone was grateful to him for stopping Nagato. Sakura apologised to him for the outburst of anger, but Naruto just nodded. He understood how foolish his behaviour was in the face of disaster. Uzumaki started to put up tents for civilians. Somebody patted him on the shoulder, someone else muttered the quiet thanks. Naruto became a hero, but this tragedy did not allow the villagers to acknowledge this fact properly. He himself began to doubt the sense of his cheerful behaviour in the shinobi world. The girl who confessed her love for him was now among the casualties. Perhaps she could have been saved if his demon had not gone mad, making it impossible for medics to take her body and start treatment. Once they could approach safely, it was already too late for Hinata. Naruto was sure that the sight of her lifeless eyes would haunt him for the rest of his life. Konohamaru, the grandson of the Third Hokage, died in a clash with one of the Six Paths of Pain. He did not live to be twelve. Watching Naruto’s childhood dream of peace die was heartbreaking for everyone, but he suffered most. 

Another series of funerals. Official ceremonies were held only for civilians. If there had been an attempt to properly honour every dead ninja, it would have taken months. Kakashi Hatake has taken over the responsibilities of Tsunade, as decided by the Council. The sixth Hokage chose Sakura as his advisor. Being Hokage's right hand was demanding, but she performed her role perfectly and did not neglect her duties in the hospital. She also managed to find time every day to visit Tsunade. In other circumstances, Naruto would probably start to sulk that Kakashi took away his desired position, but this was not the right time. Everyone was completely exhausted. Haruno always wanted Naruto to mature, but now she wanted to take her words back. Sadness on this young man's face was something unnatural and disturbing. He was supposed to be that stupid optimist, and now that he has seen the true face of the world, his eyes have lost their shine.

Then came the Summit of Five Kages. As an advisor to Hokage, Sakura was well aware of the impending war. Despite this, it was only an official meeting that made it clear: the battle was unavoidable. Later, Sasuke Uchiha unexpectedly stepped into the gathering and demanded to see Danzō Shimura. The man in question turned out to be eavesdropping on the conversation and tried to flee, but Karin’s sensing skills did not let him get far away. Sasuke's fight with some of the leaders delayed Danzō's execution but ultimately failed to save him from death. If Kakashi could be honest, he would say that Shimura deserved this fate. However, to avoid a diplomatic incident, he had to condemn the actions of his former student. Besides, even getting rid of Konoha's greatest misfortune did not erase Sasuke's crimes. Hatake wondered what was going on in Uchiha's mind when he saw his teacher and teammate as the most relevant people in the village. His resentment to Konoha has probably only increased. _Rokudaime_ and Sakura could understand Sasuke's animosity towards the village that allowed his entire clan to be murdered. After all, they could not refrain from going through the most protected files in the village. They were crushed by the fact that they could not do anything - the disclosure of this information meant that they would be charged with treason and would face the death penalty. 

Gaining access to the entire Konoha documentation has resulted in one more thing. Sakura used to believe that Orochimaru's obsession with omnipotence was something unique. To her surprise, Second Hokage showed similarly high interest in acquiring knowledge. Not always in an ethical manner. Dozens of pages of detailed descriptions of the grim research on Sharingan made Sakura understand where the Uchiha clan's idea of eye sealing came from. Although this did not explain where the seal on Kakashi's eye came from, it was not relevant at the moment. It was common knowledge that many techniques were created by Tobirama. The legends about the famous _Hiraishin_ were circulating among all nations and Sakura made sure to copy all the notes concerning that jutsu. However, the description of one of Tobirama's discoveries froze the blood in her veins. Its very name was alarming, but its purpose was truly fearsome. It was a technique that led to the death of _Sandaime_. 

_Summoning: Impure World Reincarnation._

* * *

With each passing day, Sakura learned more about the cruelty of the shinobi world. The idealised village of Konoha turned out to be built on land soaked in blood. The legendary leaders proved not to be as pure as they were portrayed. They made more mistakes than the right decisions. They were capable of barbarity. The enemies of Konoha had plenty of reasons to invade the village. Nagato's parents were killed by the shinobi of the Leaf and his homeland has been devastated by war. Sakura began to understand why Tsunade was so unwilling to return to the village. The Will of Fire was something mighty and marvellous, but at its base lay the shameful secrets of Konoha. Although Kakashi and Sakura still considered themselves loyal Konoha warriors, they understood why they had to continue fighting. The skeletons in the village’s closet have never quietened. The man who introduced himself as Madara Uchiha was supposed to have been killed by his friend, the First Hokage. The Second Hokage conducted unethical experiments and led to the isolation of the Uchiha clan. The Third Hokage has approved the elimination of the aforementioned clan. Minato Namikaze was a Hokage for too little time to commit any war crimes, but there was no certainty that in a few decades, new facts would not come out. In the light of her newly acquired knowledge, Sakura was not surprised that Tsunade did not want to return to her post even after she recovered. She has, instead, accepted the position of leader of the temporary alliance.

The war was mercilessly approaching. While villages managed to join forces, every reasonable person knew that it was a fleeting alliance. Unity against a common enemy did not equal friendly relations. No one believed in the message of most of the inspirational speeches, but appearances were kept. Fortunately, the powerful voice of Tsunade seemed to reach the hearts of shinobi. Kazekage, who has turned from a beast into a hero, has also inspired the warriors. Slowly, hope was regained that they could emerge victorious from this war. The march of thousands of ninjas was a sight to behold. Even samurai joined the noble cause. The prospect of uniting the conflicted villages and maintaining good relations after the conflict was welcomed by everyone who wanted peace.

And then the first of the reanimated appeared.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> edited 23/02/2021


	6. let the ground split

The fight against the revived members of Akatsuki was physically strenuous, but battles with loved ones were an emotional burden. The person controlling the technique did deliberately not remove the personality of his pawns. Forced to fight against their comrades and fully aware of the situation, the defeated ninja thanked their friends for sealing their bodies. This cursed, abominable technique - Edo Tensei - interfered with the idea of an everlasting peace after death. Dying was supposed to be the ultimate liberation for shinobi. Experienced warriors welcomed it with honour, knowing that they would never have to slaughter again. The damned Tobirama Senju opposed the laws of nature and fate. Sakura spent years perfecting her control over her emotions, but every familiar face on the opposite side of the battlefield caused her both sadness and rage. She moved between the medical tents and the area of combat. As a medic, she could not abandon her patients. As a kunoichi, she wished and had to fight. Meanwhile, Kakashi has masterfully led his group of ninjas to victory against the Swordsmen of the Mist.

A tragic moment has come. The well-known Ino-Shika-Cho trio had to stand against their teacher. Sakura was glad that Kakashi was busy fighting elsewhere. Even though she needed to do her own work, she could not allow her friend to suffer this sorrow again. Nevertheless, the shinobi seemed to be holding on well, but everything changed so quickly. A huge statue of surprising strength appeared on the battlefield, summoned by a masked man. Some were killed under the feet of this wooden beast. Despite great effort, attempts to seal the monster for some reason have failed. Doubt appeared on the faces of many warriors, but their morale rose again when the message reached all commanders: Naruto will soon appear on the battlefield. This time Sakura was grateful for his positive attitude. The purpose of the battle was to protect the tailed beasts, but without the jinchūriki’s support, the Alliance's chances were slim. Reports of other battles were scarce, but Sakura received information about the revived Kage. Mizukage provided surprised ninjas with tips on how to defeat him. Gaara fought his own father. This war was bizarre, but the worst was yet to happen. To the horror of all ninjas, the real Madara Uchiha arrived on the battlefield. 

There was immediate speculation about who was hiding behind the mask. Unfortunately, there was no time for long discussions, because, despite years without training, Madara proved to be a fearsome opponent. Had it not been for the circumstances, his superb skills would have been admirable. Now they only caused dread. His strength was incomprehensible and unattainable to the average person. He moved smoothly and without hesitation on the battlefield. His graceful movements resembled more a dance than combat. This frightening man has summoned two huge meteors with such ease as if it were no feat. No wonder he was able to fight on an equal footing with Hashirama in their day. It was as if a bloodthirsty god awakened suddenly. When the Five Kages stood against him, Tsunade convinced Kakashi to step aside in the fight. As the granddaughter of Hashirama, she felt obliged to face Madara. Hatake knew that his Sharingan was no match for Madara's, so he did not argue with Senju. Instead, he went without hesitation where his skills were more necessary. During the fight, the flow of information was not sufficient. Therefore, it was not known who cancelled the Edo Tensei, but no one doubted that had this not happened, their lives would be over. However, Madara Uchiha remained very much present.

Meanwhile, Kakashi and Gai have joined Naruto. Probably a large part of the alliance would have collapsed were it not for information about the impressive feat of aforementioned Uzumaki, who befriended his tailed beast and subjugated the others. While the entire fight was full of unexpected situations, what occurred to Kakashi was astonishing. When upset Naruto managed to shatter his opponent's mask, Hatake did not expect to see his former teammate. It was Obito, whom he and many others believed to be deceased. Without Gai's swift intervention, the Sixth Hokage would probably have fallen to his knees and let himself get killed. For a second, Kakashi even hoped that Rin, too, had somehow survived, but he was aware that no one who had a chest pierced by Chidori survived. On the other hand, he has never heard of anyone who survived despite having had half their body crushed. That might perhaps have been possible, but Kakashi did not have the impression that someone in this situation would be able to start a war.

The battle seemed to be taking forever. The sounds of colliding blades. Groans of the wounded. Desperate screams of the dying. The sounds of performed techniques. While Sakura has increased the reserves of her chakra, she felt that in a few hours she would have to use the sealed part. It would not be necessary if she was only healing or only fighting, but she was unable to make a choice. All of a sudden, she froze. Four previous village leaders appeared on the battlefield. If Sakura could stop the fight with impunity, she would tell the First that his dream of peace was not fulfilled due to his brother's actions. Seeing Tobirama's disdainful gaze, she wanted to approach and punch his happuri so hard it would be imprinted in his face. Had it not been for his infernal creation, this war would have looked completely different. Should Sarutobi have reacted earlier, perhaps Kakashi would not have had lifelong trauma now. Sakura refused to accept they were mere people with a right to be wrong. The young woman has matured to a large extent over the years, but she was still incredibly stubborn. She was unable to forgive them. Neither could she forgive Sasuke, who was standing right next to Hokages.

The resurrection technique was stopped, though this did not mean it could not be activated again. Obito did something unforeseen - he has summoned the army of a thousand Uchihas to the battleground. Their attire indicated that the bodies came from different historical periods. Sasuke squinted his eyes, furious at Obito, who knew clearly that he would have a hard time fighting his own clan.

"What have you done, Obito?!" yelled Madara, his rage and pain evident.

"Something we should have already done, old man," snapped the younger Uchiha. 

At that point, Tobirama understood the situation precisely. He was being approached by his own victim: Izuna Uchiha. And this was why the stoic façade of Madara collapsed. Senju could not help but find it interesting that the resurrected Izuna had his eyes, even though after his death a hundred years earlier his brother had taken them away.

"This time I will not be surprised by your technique, Senju," Izuna sneered. "Hiraishingiri, was it?"

"Correct," Tobirama stated plainly. "You are still a thousand years away from catching up with me, you insane Uchiha."

Izuna's eyes became crimson and the tomoe swirled dangerously. However arrogant Tobirama was, it had to be admitted to him that he never boasted of skills he did not possess. Even Sharingan could not keep up with the rapid pace at which Tobirama was moving. According to Sakura, it was unimaginable for someone to surpass the Uchiha's speed and she came up with only one explanation as to why the Senju had the advantage. While he did not explicitly state this in his notes, she was able to deduce that when the technique was activated, its user moved to another dimension for a fraction of a second. Although Tobirama’s abilities were impressive and Sakura respected him as one of the founders of the village, her knowledge of him as a person spoiled that admiration. In any case, the time for observation was already over: she got surrounded by Uchiha on three sides. Eliminating the medic at the very beginning of the fight was a basic tactic. Unfortunately for the opponents, Sakura was no ordinary medic. Thanks to the Sharingan, the Uchiha could predict her movements, but that did not mean that they would be able to stop them. However, before she delivered her signature punch to the ground, the blue armour covered her field of vision. 

"Why the hell is nobody defending the medic?!" Tobirama inquired angrily and Sakura felt her eyelid twitch.

"As an apprentice of your esteemed brother’s granddaughter, I do believe your intervention is not necessary, Nidaime-sama," she said respectfully, although she felt everything but respect towards him at the moment. 

Only respect could be heard in her words, yet Tobirama was an expert in recognizing fake appreciation. As long as this did not endanger other ninjas with betrayal, it was of no importance to him. The kunoichi did not seem to have malicious motives, but a personal grudge was evident. 

"Step aside," thundered Tobirama. "To fight these madmen is not a thing for a kunoichi to do."

Before the last syllable of his speech could be heard, Sakura had already jumped into the air, yelled and punched the ground with more force than intended. 

She was not afraid to admit she felt a certain amount of satisfaction when surprised Senju lost his balance for a moment. However, she was even more pleased with the opportunity to finally use her original technique. Sakura immediately took advantage of the confusion and used medical ninjutsu to stimulate rapid cell proliferation. One touch in the right spot could lead to an artery blockage and speedy death. The medic's hands proved to be a devastating tool. The mixture of inappropriate use of medical techniques, powerful kicks and accurate blows cleaned up her surroundings in a few moments. Uchiha obviously did not take her seriously since they sent feeble warriors towards her. Tobirama snorted and returned to his fight with Izuna. Overwhelmed by his lust for payback, the Uchiha was a far more threatening opponent than he was years before. Surprisingly for Tobirama, Izuna managed to injure him repeatedly with his sword. Focused on vengeance, one second too late he noticed a gloved fist that was coming from the ground directed at him. When he was hit by a chakra-infused punch, he flew several meters back. Izuna looked at the pink-haired warrior and spat blood. 

"Impressive," remarked the young Uchiha and wiped his mouth with his sleeve. "It is a pity we did not get a chance to fight in my time."

The idea that the opponent respected her as a ninja more than her own teammate turned out to be amusing in a sad way. The similarities between Izuna and Sasuke ended in appearance. 

"Allow me to heal your arm, Nidaime-sama," Sakura more commanded than requested. "Oi, Naruto! Send a clone over here for a moment, I need to heal Hokage-sama!"

As a matter of fact, she did not wait for an answer and simply started the procedure without his consent. He looked at her suspiciously, unaccustomed to the unauthorized actions of medics but did not say a word. He was surprised by the efficiency with which she restored his arm to its previous state. Times have changed, however hard it was for him to accept it. What was still puzzling him was her obvious aversion towards him. Perhaps she refused to trust him because he was no longer alive in the full sense of the word?

Well, it did not take long to get an explanation.

"You are the one who carries the true curse of hatred, Nidaime-sama," she whispered in a sad voice. "I will find a way to fix your wrong choices."


	7. not even a god can control the beast

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I may or may not have been under the influence of alcohol whilst writing the first version. This one is slightly improved.

When Sakura's chakra touched the former Hokage's body, the kunoichi already knew the treatment would be successful. Therefore, she took the liberty of looking at the battlefield. Madara considered Hashirama to be his only equal, so the Senju had made it his responsibility to defeat him. Sasuke's red-haired companion, whose name Sakura did not know, used the bizarre qualities of her body to heal the Five Kages. Sakura felt grateful to Karin as she was banned from approaching Five Kages to heal them - her priority was supposed to be other ninjas. Naruto's clone dealt with Izuna and prevented him from approaching Tobirama. The Fourth Hokage together with Sasuke and Naruto's genuine body assisted Kakashi and Gai in their fight against Obito. Tenten carried a huge fan in her arms, allowing her to use all the elements' ninjutsu. Not even Uchihas were capable of repelling the attacks consisting of the five natures of the chakra. Kunoichi from Gai's team danced on the battlefield with resolve written on her face. She masterfully used the tool she had in her hands for the first time. Sakura marvelled at her skills. Handling such potent weapons required physical strength and considerable chakra reserves. With a few movements, Tenten has considerably lowered the numbers of revived Uchiha. She was able to focus solely on the offensive because Neji covered her. Those who were foolish enough to engage in hand-to-hand combat with Lee were now lying on the ground and being sealed. Team Eight's partnership has been spectacular. The Third Hokage also became involved in the struggle against Uchiha's army to allow the Sealing Division to dispose of the defeated shinobi.

"So you think that the ability to recognise evil is a curse?" inquired Tobirama, keeping Sakura from watching the combat.

"I believe it may not be prudent to interrupt a working healer, Nidaime-sama," she responded rather plainly.

Tobirama was not accustomed to being the object of covert mockery. As a superior sensor, he believed that this bothersome person consciously avoided the answer. Since she was controlling her chakra flawlessly, talking to him would not have a detrimental effect on her performance. He wanted to patiently endure treatment and return to the battle, yet being treated in such an atypical way did not give him peace of mind. Perhaps the exaggerated respect he received as a Hokage distorted his view of human interaction, but he felt strange. 

"Answer my question, woman," he demanded.

"With all due respect, Nidaime-sama, on the battlefield I am a medic and a warrior, not a woman," she replied and now it was Tobirama’s turn to feel his eyelid twitching.

"So be it," he sighed heavily. "Iryō-nin, answer my question."

"I do not think any ability is a curse, Nidaime-sama. I do think you have a talent for describing matters in a biased way and yet making them sound neutral, though."

_Well, that stung a bit._

"Apart from the fresh wounds I also cured a muscle that was torn and healed poorly in the past. Now your arm should be fully functional, Hokage-sama," Sakura stated. "I sincerely hope that you will not regret your choice."

He nodded in acknowledgement and used Hiraishin to reappear in front of Izuna. Although the whole procedure took a maximum of two minutes in total, Tobirama felt exhausted by this interaction. The conversation was bizarre, he did not get any real response, he felt insulted and confused. Had it not been for the titles this woman put into every single statement, he would have thought she had no idea who she was talking to and hence her disrespectful attitude. And there was also the matter of her wish to change his past choices. Just how did she intend to accomplish this? Perhaps she was speaking metaphorically? Incredibly frustrating. Instead of thinking about this, he preferred to take his role as a battle strategist now, something he felt most comfortable with. Indeed, he has noticed an improvement in the mobility of his arm. What he thought to be an imperfection of the technique, turned out to be a matter of his body. Although this kunoichi was odd, she undoubtedly knew her craft. The improvement was minor but perceptible and gave him the edge he needed. Tobirama has succeeded in taking Izuna by surprise. He appeared right beside him with his seal prepared half a second earlier than Uchiha had expected him to. Had his arm been completely operational from the beginning, he would not have been able to use the Flying Thunder God technique quicker. Sealing Izuna did not escape Madara's attention despite being in the middle of the fight against Hashirama.

The suffering visible in the eyes of this powerful man was unforgettable. He who sacrificed his whole life to artificially create peace had to relive once again the things that led him to this plan. Madara simply dropped his weapon. All the confidence has vanished from his eyes. Once again, this fierce warrior has lost his last brother. Even though Izuna's current existence was brief and upsetting, Madara's heart broke. He did not have a chance to talk to him. He did not have a chance to apologise to him for not saving him from Tobirama. Bloody Senju has once again taken the same loved one from him. After the moment of vulnerability, Madara rose and promptly appeared right next to Obito.

"Obito, summon the statue," thundered the older Uchiha.

"It’s still incomplete! You won’t be able to-"

"Do it!"

Madara knew what he was doing was dangerous, yet he was unable to wait any longer. His emotional wounds have reopened. They hurt. They hurt him so damn much. Hehad to do something. Obito rapidly relocated to a safe distance, performed the required hand seals and summoned the enormous statue. The shinobi prepared themselves for another strike, but it did not come. Instead, Madara cast his armour aside and applied a seal made with his blood to his lower abdomen. Hashirama rushed towards him, but in vain - Madara's clones kept him away. The wooden beast opened seven of its nine eyes, roared and a mighty chakra flowed out of its interior. The barrier raised by Obito has made it entirely impossible for others to get near Madara, but it required so much chakra that all the reanimated Uchiha, who had not yet been sealed, ended up back in their coffins - Obito had no strength to keep them in the world of the living. All they could do was watch the man's dreadful transformation. The cracks on his face vanished - a tremendous amount of chakra brought him back to life. His skin turned pale and his hair became completely white. Bizarre horn-like structures formed on his forehead. His semi-naked body became covered by a plain white robe and black spheres materialised behind his back. It seemed long with the change in appearance came the knowledge, because Madara instinctively formed a long rod out of this black substance. Although Hashirama was never convinced by legends, he could now have sworn that what he saw were the mythical Truthseeker Orbs. Madara seemed to have tried to speak, however, the words got stuck in his throat. His teeth continued to elongate until they eventually pierced his jaw. Subsequently, his skin took on a greenish shade and started to darken. Ten branch-like objects emerged from his back. The man has been suffering, but his shattered jaw prevented him even from screaming. His eyeballs withered and shrunk like dried fruit before falling out of his eyeballs. In their place, the infamous Rinnegan appeared. At first glance, it seemed that Madara's bones were being broken by some unseen force. The reality was that he could not endure the suffering and tossed around in pain so hard that his skeleton could not handle the pressure. 

Madara groaned when a massive claw pierced his chest from the inside. Despite the injuries, the man caught the claw and stopped it from damaging the mark on his abdomen. Obito ran up to him and rapidly applied the second layer of the seal. When the barrier collapsed, the shinobi understood the gravity of the situation. Madara Uchiha has just become a vessel for a beast. Ten tails were dangerously moving behind his back and a blood-red sphere of chakra began to form between his horns. All the Kages present on the battlefield created a barrier a fraction of a second before the blast. Their combined efforts stopped the explosion, but the shinobi were terrified. If nine of the most powerful ninjas need to cooperate to stop a single man's attack, chances of survival are slim. However, Madara's satisfaction was not long-lasting, since the beast would not surrender. He fell to his knees and grabbed his head. He, a proud Uchiha, had to struggle with whispers full of temptations. The creature offered him everlasting peace in exchange for the removal of the seal. A storm was raging in his mind. The beast fed him images of his smiling brothers, of himself in a Hokage hat, of children unfamiliar with fear. For a moment, he considered giving in to the creature. 

"Madara, you are a lost but honourable man," Sakura shouted and came to the man writhing in pain, making all eyes turn to her. "I swear I will find a way to change the past if you stop this madness."

"What are you talking about, Sakura-chan? He’s an evil son of a bitch!" exclaimed Naruto.

The irony of the situation was not lost on her. A few weeks earlier, it was she who accused the Uzumaki of inadequate optimism, and now she called a man who had killed a considerable percentage of the Alliance honourable. 

"He’s not evil," she replied. ‘Madara did all of this for his brother. Can’t you see it? Can’t you see this man’s suffering? He desired peace, but chose the wrong path to it. And now Nidaime-sama killed his brother once again."

Tobirama grimaced.

"I have no family because of this guy," retorted Naruto and Sakura never heard his voice so cold. "Ero-sennin could’ve been alive. Hinata could’ve been alive. Your parents could’ve been alive. Don’t you care about them? Madara’s doing it all for the sake of power. I-"

"Seal me off. You must use a seal, because Hashirama's cells and this infernal beast will not let you kill me," grunted Madara, clearly on the verge of insanity. ‘I am unable to contain it much longer. It was a mistake… I was too prideful to accept that even I would not manage to control the Jūbi."

Tobirama was unable to process what had just happened. He watched how Uchiha brat and the son of the Fourth Hokage placed the seal on Madara's body with just a touch. Was she truly correct? Was he the one who carried the curse of hatred on his shoulders? How could one risky gesture force Madara to surrender? Why did he, known for his intellect, not understand it sooner? Who was this Sakura Haruno to have such great willpower? The man was frustrated by how many questions he had not been answered.

Sakura was still struggling to believe the fact she saw a broken man and a loving brother in Madara prevented him from doing something much more dreadful. She did not reconsider her decision before it was made. What if it turned out she had misread Madara's intentions? Fortunately, she was right, but it was not necessarily the only possible outcome. She was stupid. She put her own life and by extension other lives at risk. The man could have taken advantage of this moment of astonishment and crushed them all if it had not been for his pure intentions. A man who could not be hurt by no sword and no technique turned out to be a sensitive individual. 

"Old fool," sneered Obito. "Leaving me to clean up his mess."

"We don’t need to fight, Obito," spoke Kakashi, but his opponent snorted amusedly.

"Don't fucking make me laugh, Kakashi," snapped the Uchiha. "That kid's words won’t work on me. You can shove your speeches up your ass. I hate you, but even you deserve a perfect world. Know my generosity."

Sakura cracked her knuckles. She has learned from Tsunade that where words cannot work, a fist is the only way to go. 


	8. no chance to say a proper goodbye

Obito was furious. Bloody Madara has not only let himself get sealed but has also taken the ten-tailed beast with him. The monster was the key to their plan. How could Madara allow himself to be manipulated by a kid like that? Obito lost his beloved, whose life was taken by someone he considered a friend. Nakamagoroshi no Kakashi received the title of Hokage. First, the chance for love was taken away from Obito, and now the detestable Hatake has become a village leader. Destroying the seal securing Madara's body seemed unlikely. It was too sophisticated and extensive, which made Uchiha wonder for a moment how two brats got access to such an elaborate technique. He no longer had the means to implement his plan to build the ideal world. All he could accomplish at this point was vengeance for depriving him of all his desires. He was already near Kakashi when a rose-haired female warrior stepped between them. 

"You only have one chance, Kakashi. When he attacks me, use Chidori and pierce my body. I promise you, everything will be fine," she whispered only for Kakashi to be able to hear it.

Has she gone insane? How could she force him to do something like that? He never really told her about the way he killed his teammate, but the whole situation sounded painfully similar. Did his student want to sacrifice herself? Rin wanted to prevent herself from becoming a danger to the village, so she rushed in front of Kakashi to receive his Chidori. Sakura wanted to enable him to end the war in the same way. 

"I’m not quite as soft as Madara, girl," he snapped, seeing her despicable face.

"I’m therefore pleased that I had no intention of convincing you of anything," she replied. ‘Infūin: Kai! Ninpō Sōzō Saisei: Byakugō no Jutsu!"

Creation Rebirth? Has Kakashi understood correctly? Has Sakura mastered the jutsu with which Tsunade conquered a country? Now it was much simpler for him to shut himself off from his traumatic memories for the time of the battle. Tsunade used this technique against Madara, but Obito had not yet had the opportunity to see it. Black markings covered Sakura’s whole body, creating elaborate patterns. Her eyes seemed to take on an even more intense shade of green. Raging Obito moved towards her, but Sakura avoided each of his punches. Training with Gai allowed her to deliver accurate punches, but none of them reached the target - Obito's space-time technique made it impossible. Eventually, his hand got covered with a layer of chakra and moved towards Sakura's chest. Kakashi witnessed this moment and activated his signature technique. When Obito's hand pierced her body, Hatake's hand did the same and reached the Uchiha's heart through Sakura's torso. Kakashi let out a sigh of relief when Sakura's wound immediately closed after withdrawing his hand. To their horror, Obito seemed to feel no pain. The left side of his chest was pierced through, but the damage to his heart did not affect him. There was a gaping hole in place of his heart and yet he stood still. Obito watched his retreating opponents with amusement. Naruto’s clones attacked him to buy the Alliance some time to prepare a strategy.

"What the actual fuck?!" Sakura yelled angrily. 

"He’s a puppet," Kakashi spoke in disbelief, watching the Uchiha from a distance.

"You're not the only one stealing jutsus, Kakashi!" exclaimed Obito. "Sasori got himself killed by your kunoichi, but he was useful at least for that."

"So there must be a core somewhere, but this trick will not work a second time," replied Kankurō. "We cannot afford random attacks. Rokudaime-sama, can you use Sharingan to see where the densest concentration of chakra in his body is?"

"His entire body is filled with chakra," stated the Sixth Hokage. "It is evenly distributed."

"The only solution would be to destroy his whole body, then," spoke Tobirama, his crimson eyes focused on the only remaining enemy. "This will require some sort of bypassing of his space-time ninjutsu."

"My Sharingan was originally his. Its ability is Kamui, which transfers selected objects to another dimension. Obito avoids attacks by moving his whole body or its parts to this other dimension," explained Kakashi. "Thanks to this Naruto was able to damage his mask: I transferred his Rasengan to the Kamui dimension when Obito was hiding inside. However, I have insufficient amounts of chakra to do it again."

"Sakura and I can lend you our chakra, Kakashi," said Tsunade. "The amount stored in our seals should be more than enough for you to use Kamui."

"Everyone has to be ready to perform their most intense ranged techniques," spoke Tobirama and halted suddenly. "Or not. Rinnegan is capable of absorbing the chakra-based attacks."

"Fuck," cursed Tsunade, earning a shocked look from her grandfather. "So what-"

"I’ll do it," spoke Maito Gai calmly. "Your ranged attacks will serve as a distraction. Obito will have to move to another dimension to avoid them. Then Kakashi will use Kamui to transport me there. I will open the eighth gate."

"Gai, this technique will kill you!" yelled Kakashi, desperately trying to find another solution.

"This technique is our only chance to save the shinobi world," argued Gai and Hatake deep down knew he was right. "The winter of my life must pass for the spring of my youth to come."

"Gai, I...," Kakashi had no idea what to say. "I will always remember you, the Green Beast of Konoha."

Tsunade released her seal and stood behind Kakashi together with Sakura. Both women put their hands on his back and marks from their bodies wrapped around his skin. Kakashi sensed a significant flow of chakra and felt an even greater respect for the technique that only these two kunoichis knew. While all users of long-distance techniques were preparing for a simultaneous attack, Kakashi looked at his longtime friend. Once Gai realised Hatake was looking at him, he smiled at him reassuringly. Both men knew this moment would come one day, but that did not lessen Kakashi's pain. His comrade was going to die so that he and the others could live. 

"Hachimon Tonkō! First Gate: Kaimon, release!"

The Gate of Opening. It broke all mental restraints.

"Second Gate: Kyūmon, release!"

The Gate of Healing. It enabled the user to regenerate their energy immediately.

"Third Gate: Seimon, release!"

The Gate of Life. It radically increased the speed of the user.

"Fourth Gate: Shōmon, release!"

The Gate of Pain. It tore the user’s muscles in exchange for increased strength.

"Fifth Gate: Tomon, release!"

The Gate of Limit. It bypassed the physical limitations of the human body.

"Sixth Gate: Keimon, release!"

The Gate of View. It increased the properties of the user's body to such an extent that the air around them seemed to be burning. Kakashi had the privilege of watching Gai perform Asa Kujaku: the Morning Peacock after opening this gate. 

"Seventh Gate: Kyōmon, release!"

The Gate of Wonder. It allowed the person opening it to use Hirudora: the Afternoon Tiger. At the moment, Kakashi wanted to close his eyes, but he knew that he would never see his friend alive again. Besides, he had the sacred responsibility to make sure that all his sacrifice would not be in vain.

"Eighth Gate: Shimon, release!"

A blood-red aura surrounded Gai. His heart was beating so fast that it seemed as if it was about to jump out of his chest. He has achieved a formidable strength that none of the gathered could ever wish for. Maito Gai has been the only ninja unable to use chakra, and yet he has surpassed all the shinobi with taijutsu only. Hashirama himself would not be equal to Gai after he opened the Eighth Gate.

"I am prepared. Go!" he yelled with his powerful voice.

Everyone has released their techniques. The noise produced by thousands of jutsus was unbearable, yet Kakashi was unable to register the noise, focusing only on Gai. He knew, after all, that the man was more than proud of how his life was going to finish. He had come a long way and the ultimate honour awaited him at its end. 

Kakashi has activated his Kamui.


	9. long-term plans and long-term wagers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Show me any insight, justify our fate  
> Tell me that our lives have not been lived in vain  
> I command attention, I demand that you explain  
> I am begging you, make sense of what has been ordained
> 
> ('Dark Imperium' by StringStorm)

The former Hokages have committed to assist in cleaning up the battlefield. Fires consuming the surrounding vegetation were extinguished. The shattered rocks have been removed and the soil surface evened out. Transportation of the deceased was carried out with the help of sealing scrolls due to an excessive number of corpses. Tobirama has once again begun to reflect on the meaning of Sakura's words. He was an outstanding warrior, but he was not as adept at human interaction as he would have liked. Ultimately, he decided to face the woman himself instead of overthinking her statement. He found her in a medical tent during the treatment of several gravely wounded shinobi from Sand. Most ninjas have already returned to their home villages, but the medics stayed on the battlefield, where survivors were still being sought. 

‘Unfortunately, you will have to wait for your turn, but if the wound is too severe, I will summon Tsunade-sama’, said Sakura without lifting her head.

‘Speak plainly about your words, woman’, Tobirama demanded and only then did she look at her visitor.

‘Oh, it’s you, Nidaime-sama’, Sakura answered. ‘Sadly, you are no exception, especially since you do not need medical care. Please wait until I finish taking care of my patients.’

Tobirama humphed while complying with her request. He had to admit she was an exceptional medic and handled the fight quite well, but he could not go over the way she treated him. Everything he did in life was for the sake of the village. How dare she now accuse him of hatred? He has never prioritised his personal gain over Konoha’s benefit. Under his rule, the village thrived. The Ninja Academy has been founded and trade between countries has flourished. A shinobi code was created and emergency protocols were established. Tobirama rejected all proposals for arranged marriages, despite the obvious personal advantages to have time to supervise the village. 

‘You may enter, _Hokage-sama_ ’, announced Sakura and the second Hokage did not waste time waiting since he wanted to know what he allegedly did wrong.

‘Let me get straight to the point’, she said, surprising him. ‘While it is true that you have done a lot of good for the village and your commitment has ensured its growth, you have also made mistakes. The fact that you deliberately isolated Uchihas from the rest of the community to keep them under constant control led to a loss of trust and ultimately to the fall of the clan. Your prejudices have resulted in Madara going down the wrong path.’

‘The Uchihas were a threat to the rest of the village’, Tobirama argued. ‘They never fully integrated into the population.’

‘You never gave them a chance to do so, _Nidaime-sama_ ’, the kunoichi snapped. 

‘Assuming that perhaps you may be correct, how do you intend to fix my supposedly flawed choices?’, he challenged, not expecting any sensible response, since he considered the woman's arguments to be based on emotions.

‘As you are well aware, the space-time ninjutsu does exist, so it is a matter of time and effort to create the necessary technique’, she replied and left him speechless for a second.

‘And afterwards what? Are you telling me if you manage to go back to the past or change the passage of time, you will tell me a story that might as well have been made up?’, he asked. ‘There is potential in you, however, you are naïve.’

‘I intend to do everything in my power to make it happen’, she assured him and her next words made him reconsider his words about her being naïve. ‘If I fail in my attempts to appeal to your intelligence, I will kill you.’

‘Do you think it is reasonable to inform me about you considering killing me?’, he inquired and crouched to be on her level. ‘I might end your life here and now.’

‘I would have sealed you sooner than I would have run out of chakra, _Hokage-sama_ ’, she spoke boldly and looked straight into the crimson eyes. ‘Like my _shishō_ , I will never die in battle.’

Sakura was bluffing and Tobirama was aware of this. Moreover, he did not believe for a second that she would be able land a punch on him, let alone defeat him. Nevertheless, he found her audacity remarkable and somehow endearing. He straightened out without interrupting eye contact.

‘I suggest placing a bet’, he said and Sakura’s eyebrows rose. ‘I will seal a piece of my mind in my kunai. If you manage to go back in time, stabbing my body with it will restore my recollection of this war and this discussion. You presented yourself as a capable warrior, so you should have no problem inflicting this wound. If you fail, you will carry for the rest of your life the burden of embarrassment that you overestimated your capabilities.’

‘Deal’, she accepted his offer, although she was not entirely convinced of her chances. ‘How are you going to extract your mind, _Hokage-sama_?’

‘I intend to use the method I created during the development of Edo Tensei’, he replied and he pulled the kunai out of his pouch. ‘The details will be revealed to you when we meet in the past.’

A sarcastic smirk appeared on his face and Sakura had to put all her willpower into not knocking the man into next week. Who would have thought the legendary leader of one of the most influential villages could be so infuriating? It is one thing to commit errors, but this man deliberately tried to upset her with his mockery. She was nevertheless grateful to him that he took their wager in a serious manner. It was clear to her that he was not jesting, since he had just placed a sealed kunai inside his head. Some moments later, he removed the tool, took off his pouch, put the kunai inside it and handed it to the woman.

‘Judging by your knowledge, you have already taken the liberty of examining my notes. Nevertheless, I would like to give you official permission to use them during your research’, he announced. 

‘Sakura- _sama_! We've found another survivor in dire need of medical attention!’, yelled someone from behind the entrance.

‘Bring them in!’, she replied. ‘If you will excuse me, _Nidaime-sama_.’

He nodded in acknowledgement and went outside. Although Tobirama has been somewhat sarcastic, he left the medical tent feeling rather impressed. Sakura demonstrated her battle and medical skills, making the Second Hokage believe her intelligence could also allow her to achieve this more challenging goal. However, he did not feel comfortable expressing this openly and considered the offer he made to her a sufficient form of recognition for her skills. In the shinobi world, strange events have taken place. Should fate desire this woman to alter history, Tobirama could accept it. He wondered whether to report the whole incident to his brother, but decided against it. Priority was given to more significant issues: before stopping the technique, ex-Hokages wished to find out just how the village changed. After he notified the medical camp's guards of his departure, he used Hiraishin as a means of reaching the village. He was pleased to note that several decades after his death, the seal placed on a stone likeness of his brother remained unchanged. Even though he had already met all the Hokages whose rule followed his death, it was an intriguing experience to find six stone heads instead of two.

While he was aware he should head for the Hokage Tower, he chose to see the village himself first. Because the war took place far away from the human settlements, the architecture remained intact. He noted an obvious increase in the number of more modern-looking buildings. Moreover, he saw tent-like structures which he assumed to be trading areas. The hospital was in the same spot as it used to be, but it was considerably larger. He was also intrigued by the sight of people who were clearly not ninjas. In his time, all men and some women were involved in combat. He was glad that now there was no such necessity despite the lack of peace. Only those who were willing to endanger their lives chose a shinobi career path. Nevertheless, the repercussions of the struggle against Pain, of which he had heard, were still evident. Civilian houses have been rebuilt, but those presumably inhabited by ninjas were still incomplete. What seemed to be the saddest sight was the cemetery several times larger than years ago. He was certain that in a significant part of the graves, perhaps even in the majority, lay deceased shinobi. Sensing his brother's chakra signature approaching, he sighed; his moment of solitary reflection has come to an end. 

‘We have been awaiting you, but clearly we are not deserving of your presence’, said Hashirama in mock hurt. ‘Well, the village has evolved, huh?’

‘That seems to be the case’, replied Tobirama. ‘Some aspects remained unchanged, though.’

‘And what would those be?’

‘Above all, your inability to give me a break’, grunted the younger Senju.

Hashirama's hearty and loud laughter never failed to brighten up Tobirama's day. Although he often reprimanded him and pointed out his mistakes, he considered him the most significant person in his life. The First Hokage certainly saw the amount of respect and affection his younger sibling had for him. 


	10. memories of trauma and those not to be forgotten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I fell with a wish of salvation on my lips  
> Yet I find myself alive in a new apocalypse
> 
> ('Dark Imperium' by StringStorm)

Those shinobis whose chakra was completely depleted needed much longer treatment than those with some kind of reserves. Besides, finding them was made much harder by the lack of chakra traces. For this reason, Sakura did not return home until a day and a half after the end of the war. The young woman felt exhausted, but her conscience was clear. _An iryō-nin cannot give up treatment until the patient's last breath_. There was also another principle she followed in life and believed to be more significant. _Those who break the rules are scum, but those who abandon their friends are worse than scum_. Ironically, she had no idea that Kakashi had heard these words from someone who had nearly annihilated the ninja world. Nevertheless, the idea was right. Therefore, despite being fatigued, Sakura decided to check on Kakashi first. The war could not do any good for his mental health. She headed towards his apartment and, after a dozen or so steps, turned back. After all, Kakashi was Hokage. The sense of obligation would not allow him to rot in bed while he had such a responsible role. Without a doubt, he was at his office now. When Sakura arrived at the Hokage Tower, she was welcomed by her friend's tired dark eyes. Several high stacks of documents took up more than half the desk. 

‘Being your advisor, I highly recommend that you sleep’, she said. ‘It’s unhealthy not to rest.’

‘All my friends are dead, and the last one wants to leave’, he answered, playing with a pen. ‘Why should I care?’

‘ _Nidaime-sama_ told you about my plan, didn’t he?’, asked Sakura, although she already knew it. ‘Please do understand that I want to do this for you too. Perhaps if I manage to change the past, I will be able to prevent you from ever going through such traumatic experiences.’

‘You're not even sure that you will succeed’, he responded and stood up, anger becoming increasingly evident in his voice. ‘The risk is too high. Interfering with something as fundamental as time may have disastrous consequences.’

‘I can't squander this opportunity’, she argued, clenching her fists. ‘I will go ahead and do it anyway because it is the right thing to do.’

‘You can't do that without access to the Second's notes’, Hatake sneered. ‘I withdraw authorisation for you to read classified documents, effective immediately. Your notes based on those are to be destroyed in the presence of witnesses, including me.’

‘Are you fucking messing with me, Kakashi?!’, she shrieked and slammed her fist on the desk, scattering bits of wood and previously neatly stacked papers across the room. ‘Why are you doing this? Why not allow others to help you?’

‘Because I’m sick of people close to me sacrificing something for my sake!’, he barked and closed his eyes, trying to calm himself down.

‘Tell me: why can't you understand that this might be a chance for you to have a better life?’, she demanded angrily. ‘It's because of Obito, isn't it?’

‘Don't talk as if you know me’, snapped Kakashi and immediately paled, seeing the expression on the woman's face. ‘I didn't mean it that way. Look, Sakura, I need-’

‘What you need is some goddamn therapy’, she interrupted. ‘Our friendship is too close for me to be your therapist. You can confide in me and I can prescribe you medication, but you require psychological help.’

‘And what's the point if you're going to leave anyway?’, he asked quietly, refusing to make eye contact. ‘I won't deny that I'm a bit fucked in the head. Still, I don't think even a sane person would be fine without friends. I would rather carry an emotional burden and have you around than potentially live a happy life. I have no one left but you.’

The words he said to Sakura left her speechless for a few seconds. His pleading gaze and sorrow in his voice broke her heart. She wanted to punch herself for not taking Kakashi's views into account. On her own, she offered him assistance and companionship, and now she wanted to deprive him of something that gave him a glimmer of happiness. The obvious solution occurred to her.

‘Then come with me’, she responded and noticed how Kakashi's eyes opened wider. ‘You could prepare Naruto for the position of Hokage while I research the space-time technique.’

‘I don't want to be a burden to you. Forgive me for pressuring you’, he said quietly. ‘Now that I have calmed down, I see I have acted like a madman. I’ve been much more unstable since the war. I trusted your abilities, and yet I was frightened when you instructed me to hit Obito through your chest. I don't think I'm ready to tell you exactly what happened in the past. I trust you, it's just too difficult for me to talk about. Suffice to say, it wasn't just Obito who sacrificed himself for me.’

‘Kakashi Hatake, you have never been, are not and will not be a burden to me’, Sakura stated, walked between the remains of the shattered furniture and put her hands on her friend's shoulders. ‘There is nothing wrong with you not yet being able to tell me what has happened. I'll give you some time to decide if you want to accompany me. Oh, and I'll get you a new desk. Sorry about that.’

‘No need to wait. I've already made up my mind’, he replied and smiled at her from behind the mask. ‘You won't get rid of me so easily, Haruno.’

‘Since you've already decided, we need to address several important points’, she announced and started picking up the desk fragments. ‘Sorry for that outburst. I’ll get you a new one, I promise. You can move to my office for a while, as it's going to take four to five weeks to manufacture a new desk.’

‘Did you plan all of this?’, Kakashi asked and furrowed his eyebrows.

‘Nope, I was Tsunade's apprentice’, she chuckled. ‘According to Shizune, the desk didn't last past the first week.’

Mention of the woman who died during Pain's invasion thickened the atmosphere again. Beyond the sadness, however, it also brought a reinforcement of their resolve. Kakashi never doubted Sakura's ability to create a space-time technique. All his worries were about his mental health and fear of loneliness. Sakura's proposition and the ease with which she presented it caught Kakashi by surprise. He was nearly certain she would start making up excuses to exclude him from the process. At first, he wondered if she wanted to escape from him and his issues by using time travel. That would be quite an overkill. He felt rather foolish for suspecting her of such a thing. Sakura was in no way selfish. That young woman was courageous, powerful, caring, insightful, forgiving and smart. She was also stubborn, temperamental, honest to a fault and petty, but that was beside the point. Ultimately, it was these flaws that reminded him Sakura had retained the essence of her personality despite her maturity. When he had first heard of her plan, he had thought she had given him hope only to have it trampled on, but now he knew how mistaken he had been. Right now, his hope to improve the world was higher than ever before. The prospect of establishing a future with fewer wars, intrigues and assassinations thrilled him. Suddenly Kakashi sighed heavily and scratched the back of his neck.

‘Don't tell me you've changed your mind because I won't let you put your finger on the Second's notes’, Sakura threatened, seeing the change in his attitude.

‘That is not it. I just don't want to pick up all these documents’, he grinned sheepishly. ‘Especially since I'm not the one who scattered them.’

‘Hey, it's partially your fault!’, she yelled.

‘See you in your office’, he smirked and waved goodbye. ‘Along with the paperwork.’

Before she had time to protest, Kakashi used the same jutsu that had allowed him to get away with paying dozens of times. Sakura rolled her eyes and felt like leaving the mess at the Hokage Tower, but she couldn't bring herself to do it. She couldn't be upset with Kakashi either - humour was sometimes his coping mechanism. And she couldn't help but admit that his comedic timing was brilliant. Smiling under her breath, she started to clean up. She vowed to herself that she would simply punch him in the face next time. It would be a clearer statement. When she was almost finished, unexpectedly the door opened and four Hokages walked into the room.

‘ _Hokage-sama_ !’, she said and bowed politely, clearly embarrassed. ‘Due to... technical problems, _Rokudaime-sama_ is now residing in the Chief Medic's office.’

‘We are aware of this’, answered Hashirama; if he knew how the 'technical problems' had arisen, he kept it to himself. ‘We came to express our admiration for your accomplishments. Rokudaime and my granddaughter spoke to us about your part in bringing the village to its current position. As an advisor to the Hokage, Chief Medic, excellent kunoichi and initiator of establishing a psychological care system for young shinobi, you are deserving of our thanks. Please accept our deep gratitude, Sakura Haruno, even though we might not recall this encounter in the past.’

‘ _Anija_!’, hissed Tobirama, but it was too late.

‘I was unaware _Nidaime-sama_ had deemed my plans worthy of discussion with the Shinobi God himself. I am honoured’, Sakura said in a most respectful tone of voice, but still sent a chilling glance to the Second Hokage. 

‘My sincere gratitude to you for what you have done for the village and its great asset: Kakashi Hatake’, declared Sarutobi, obviously sensing the tension between his master and Sakura. 

_And for your life, which you are willing to sacrifice for the sake of past and future generations._ This he would say if he desired further destruction of the Hokage's office. The Third wisely decided against it.

‘I haven't had the opportunity to thank you properly for saving my son’, spoke the Namikaze and hugged the woman baffled by the whole situation. ‘He has told me about you.’

‘While I am deeply honoured by your appreciation, _Hokage-sama_ , I hardly deserve such commendations’, began Sakura, shifting into her professional mode. ‘All I do is fulfil my duties. It is me who should express my gratitude for being allowed to live in a village moulded by you. However, while I value every second of your time here, I am concerned about the fact the contract has not been broken. Is there any issue with the technique?’

_Apart from its creation?_ And that, in turn, would have been said by Sakura if she intended to experience Tobirama's wrath. Nevertheless, she was well aware of the massive difference in power levels, so she refrained from even dreaming of uttering that sentence. What she wanted was a chance to complete her plan, which would be hampered if she were turned into a bloody pulp in her workplace. She silently congratulated herself on her composure. Had Sakura retained her character from years before, there would probably be a burial arranged for her right now.

‘ _Shodaime-sama_ insisted that we help rebuild the village, and I believe it is the only right course of action. Akatsuki's invasion was disastrous, and additionally, the war has severely slowed down your efforts’, explained Hiruzen. ‘Furthermore, I imagine _Hokage-sama_ wishes to spend time with his granddaughter, though that is only my guess.’

‘Can you blame a man for not wanting to waste such an opportunity?’, Hashirama grinned. ‘She grew up to be a splendid woman! I always believed that my princess would become a brilliant kunoichi, yet she has exceeded my expectations. And then there's her apprentice! Second Tsunade, I say!'

‘One Tsunade is more than sufficient. It is a wonder the village is still standing. Barely’, muttered Tobirama. ‘A spoiled brat as a Hokage? How pitiful.’

‘ _Nidaime-sama_ . You may mock me or dispute my competence and out of respect for you, I will not utter a single word. But the moment you insult my _shishō_ and my Hokage, I may be compelled to react’, snapped Sakura and looked into his crimson eyes. ‘Tsunade _-shishō_ almost lost her life protecting the villagers. Were it not for her, only a few ninjas would have survived, let alone civilians. I will not allow her reputation to be trampled on by anyone, including a former Hokage.

‘Oh, dear. I'm glad at least one of you won't remember this conversation’, spoke Hashirama and rubbed his forehead. ‘I am delighted to see Tsuna has such a brilliant pupil from whom her uncle might learn a thing or two about respect.’

‘ _Anija_ , you are pushing it’, grunted Tobirama and looked to the side, pouting almost comically.

Sakura figured by now that Hashirama's happy-go-lucky attitude was merely a façade. The First Hokage was an outstanding strategist, a formidable warrior, and a respectable man. His younger brother held him in high esteem. Out of all the four former Hokages she had the chance to see now from their more human side, the First appealed to her the most. Not only was he an extraordinary individual on the battlefield, but in his personal life as well. His charming presence, sense of humour, and charisma had undoubtedly contributed to his accomplishments as head of the Senju clan. Haruno aspired to be like him, however, she had to admit with disappointment she was more like Tobirama, who on the other hand had made the most awful impression on her. He was abrasive, perpetually grouchy, hateful and temperamental. That being said, she was unable to deny him his talent for investigation, plotting, and creation. The creation of techniques such as this hellish _Edo Tensei_ , for instance. Oh, how she longed to knock him down for merely considering something like this jutsu. Yet another massive incentive for this plan was to be able to go back in time to kick his presumptuous ass. 

Tobirama, on the other hand, remained stunned by the fact that somebody as disrespectful as her was allowed to perform an essential function in the village. Had it been up to him, he would have forbidden her to set foot on the threshold of the Hokage Tower or even the settlement itself. Perhaps she was a slightly above average medic. She might have fared a little better than an ordinary woman on the battlefield. And perhaps he could admit she had an acceptable level of knowledge. Still, he held a substantial dislike for her due to her actions. What an irksome woman! Although in his time he had been able to gather a lot of evidence that women deserved positions equal to those of men, this one he would gladly have locked up in the house, just to avoid hearing her. Patiently, he waited for the end of the conversation his brother had engaged in with her to finally leave the damn office. He was sick of the pink-haired witch acting like she was in a position of equality with him. He would be cursed if she succeeded in developing the blasted jutsu. And he had a sneaking suspicion that offering her a bet had been unwise - now she was probably just more obsessed with the idea of success. With dismay, he registered his brother's next words.

‘Hey, Tobirama, could you perform the same kunai trick on me?’, Hashirama asked. ‘To be unable to remember this most enchanting lady would be horrible!’


	11. a method in her madness

Despite the whole situation being astounding, Sakura was overjoyed to have the opportunity to speak with Hashirama. Having swiftly collected the rest of the documents, she got into a lively discussion with him. His vast combat and medical knowledge made the conversation engaging. While he lacked the precise control of chakra she had, he made up for the absence of this skill with his immense reserves of power. They compared their capabilities and consulted ideas about medical ninjutsu while the Third and Fourth Hokage examined the changes that had occurred in the office since their last appearance. Well, apart from the remains of the desk waiting to be cleaned up, which was a low priority anyway. Tobirama, meanwhile, stood against the wall with his arms crossed and closely monitored his brother. And it was after this discussion when Hashirama expressed his desire to retrieve his memory in the event of Sakura's success. Tobirama was not pleased to be pressed into preserving his brother's memories. The elder among brothers chose to have his memories sealed just before the end of the technique. With obvious distaste, Tobirama acknowledged his request.

‘Do not even consider taking the information contained in these weapons for yourself’, threatened Tobirama, feeling Sakura's suspicious gaze on him. ‘Should they come into contact with chakra-infused tissue other than our own, they will explode.’

‘Are you considering me a fool, Nidaime-sama?’, she replied. ‘Or, perhaps worse, a traitor?’

‘You need to earn my trust’, he answered her question and looked at her disdainfully. ‘As for you being a fool: I do not have sufficient information.’

‘I hope, therefore, that I will provide satisfactory proof of my loyalty and knowledge’, she said with a smile, using all her willpower to refrain from snapping at him. ‘Pardon me, my lords, but I must deliver these documents to _Rokudaime-sama_.’

‘Would you mind if I were to accompany you?’, inquired Hashirama. 

‘I would be honoured, however, I do not want to impose on you’, responded Sakura, really meaning it.

‘Nonsense!’, exclaimed _Shoidaime_ cheerfully and took a pile of documents in his hands. ‘There remains so little time and yet so much to tell. Better to seize the moment before we meet again.’

She bowed respectfully to the three remaining Hokages and held the door open to allow Hashirama to walk through. There was no escaping the analytical and judgmental gaze of Tobirama, which was seemingly a constant in the universe. As soon as they left the room, Hashirama let out a heavy sigh. Sakura decided not to press for an explanation, and instead just looked questioningly at the man. 

‘On behalf of Tobirama, may I ask for your forgiveness?’, he finally spoke. ‘He is a truly remarkable man, albeit somewhat…’

_Extremely rude? Excessively paranoid? Perpetually grumpy? Logical to a fault? Emotionally stunted?_ The suggestions came to Sakura’s mind immediately. She had decided against expressing them verbally, though that required even more effort than keeping herself from strangling the younger Senju with his fur collar. And she was well aware Tobirama had been a war-raised child, however, so had been Kakashi and she did not see him walking around the village with a disdainful gaze and looking for a conspiracy. Hashirama, who grew up alongside him, was a man of such a warm nature that it was unthinkable to take them for siblings without knowing about them being related.

‘...well, overly concerned about the security of the village’, he finished and smiled sheepishly. ‘Please do not take his behaviour to heart and let us talk about something more intriguing. Say, what prompted you to make this decision? I am aware of the bet of yours, but nothing more.’

‘I believe Lord Second made the wrong choice when he separated the Uchiha clan from the rest of the village’, she said carefully not to sound disrespectful. ‘They played an equal role in its formation, so why did they not deserve a space alongside the Senju? The classified historical records mention all of this. As an advisor to the Hokage, I have access to them.’

‘I always felt the resentment against the Uchiha would be the village's undoing’, replied Hashirama, gazing ahead in thought.

‘One misguided decision has led to dozens of tragedies. Surely your esteemed brother had no intention of causing such a disaster, but it is unrealistic to pretend he was not partly to blame’, Sakura continued, leading the former village leader to the hospital. ‘However, he refuses to acknowledge this and regards me a madwoman.’

‘You are indeed a wise lady, Sakura Haruno. What you hold in your heart is not the Will of Fire’, he spoke and her eyes shot up to him. ‘You carry the fire itself. And you are indeed crazy, daring to pull such a feat, but perhaps that is the very thing Konoha requires - a touch of madness.’

‘ _Hokage-sama_ , I pledge to do everything in my power to improve the shinobi world and bring back your dream of peace’, she said in response and opened the door to her office only not to find _Rokudaime_ there. ‘Senju- _sama_ , could you please put those documents on the desk? Please forgive me, but I must find him.’

Hashirama nodded as a sign of understanding. From experience, he knew what it was like to have a companion prone to running away. In desperate circumstances, Madara also used to hide in places known only to himself. While Hashirama did not have any knowledge of Kakashi's past, he could tell from his behaviour he was a man of troubled background. Having no more discussion partners, he chose to continue helping rebuild the village after this brief break. He and other Hokages were assured Konoha would manage without their exertion, but as the founder of this area, he could not just simply do nothing. Meanwhile, Sakura headed towards the stone memorial on the outskirts of the village. And indeed, that was exactly where she found Hatake. She knew nobody else would have been able to catch a glimpse of him there - Kakashi only allowed himself to be found by those he wished to be found by. The man stood with his hands in the pockets of his standard jōnin uniform, having abandoned his Hokage robe someplace. His friend knew it was not the right time to try and distract him with humour. She simply stood next to him and placed a hand on his shoulder. The medic noticed he was staring at the very end of the list of recently added names.

‘My father used to say I should not underestimate Gai, as one day his strength would surpass mine. And he was right. Ultimately, it was he who won our competition’, said Hatake and smiled with no mirth. ‘I am unlikely to achieve anything comparable to sacrificing my life for the shinobi world.’

‘We will change this world for the better, Kakashi’, she whispered and grabbed him tighter. ‘We are going to prevent as many tragedies as we can.’

‘Will it be the same world, though? The very same people?’, he asked. ‘I doubt they would remember us if we ever even came back.’

‘That is why I wanted you to give some serious consideration to your choice. I have no intention of going back’, Sakura said and Hatake looked at her questioningly. ‘Meddling with something as elementary as spacetime is a risky affair. This is a one-way journey. This minimises the likelihood of problems.’

‘Why didn't you tell me about this earlier? Had I known about it beforehand, I wouldn't have even bothered to think about it’, Kakashi inquired, making Sakura’s heart sink for a moment. ‘Right now you have no chance in hell of getting rid of me. I refuse to let you go alone into the past with no way of coming back.’

‘I... thank you, Kakashi' she spoke, trying not to let her excessive relief show. ‘You have no idea how thankful I am to you. I was afraid to do something like that myself. I'm only human and the prospect of being alone terrified me.’

Hatake meant to tell her he would not allow her to be all alone. He wanted to say he valued her as a friend, an advisor and a fellow warrior on the battlefield. Articulating his feelings, however, came with substantial effort. Therefore, he merely hugged Sakura firmly. When she returned his embrace and again thanked him softly, he knew she understood his intentions. It made him happier to know this young woman, who had chosen to take the weight of the entire shinobi world on her shoulders, also recognized him as a significant person in her life. The possibility of losing her permanently frightened him. What if the Second had not informed him of her plan, and she had chosen to keep it a secret? And what if she just simply had not shown up at the Hokage's office one day? It was something he did not want to consider. He was not supposed to dwell on it. Nevertheless, he just could not resist doing so and thus ended up in front of a monument honouring the fallen ninja.

‘It is me who should be thanking you, Sakura’, he finally declared. ‘Well, I'm finally going to do it. Thank you for being there for me. Thank you for your trust, for caring, for sharing your time with me and for accepting the role of my advisor. Thank you for contributing to settling this conflict and for saving countless lives. Thank you for not loathing me even though I let you down as a sensei. Thank you for becoming my friend.’

‘For a person struggling to convey emotions, you deal quite well with words’, she managed to say after a few seconds. ‘I won't thank you again for the same thing lest we fall into an endless loop of gratitude, though.’

‘Way to ruin a mood, Sakura’, he sighed dramatically and hugged her again. ‘Now that we have overcome this moment of vulnerability, why don't you tell me what happened at the office? It lasted far too long for a simple thanks.’

‘I may or may not have come into slight disagreement with the Second Hokage’, she admitted reluctantly. ‘He doesn't trust me at all, despite having seen what I did during the war. Instead, he looks at me with disdain, insults my mentor and, worst of all, refuses to accept he made mistakes. Had it not been for my practised composure, I would have been imprisoned for the attempted assassination of the former Hokage.’

‘Well, yeah, there were legends not only about the strength of the Second but also about how mighty his assholery was’, laughed Kakashi. ‘Not even Sasuke could compare to him in this regard.’

As soon as he uttered those words, he felt like slapping himself in the face. Sakura had not spoken of her feelings towards the fugitive Uchiha for quite some time, so Kakashi could not be certain if she genuinely had no affection for him anymore.

‘Let's just stand by the fact that they're both assholes, although one of them has yet to try to kill me’, she joked morbidly. ‘What's more crucial is that from tomorrow I'm getting on with my research on space-time technique, so be ready for me to bring you some notes.’

Kakashi could have said he was beyond amazed at how well she cut herself off from negative memories, but that was a basic ninja skill. He had a sneaking suspicion she was sometimes haunted by those distressing thoughts just as he had experienced them. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Never again will creeping shadows darken our doors  
> Never again will chaos loom while we go conquer the stars  
> I will not settle for waiting to die in this stagnation  
> We must be proud and unified for our salvation
> 
> ('Dark Imperium' by StringStorm)


	12. reassurances and reassessments

Hashirama had been a mighty warrior worthy of respect and a legend even while he remained alive. Nevertheless, his farewells were the most pathetic sight in the world. Sakura had not expected the First Hokage to start wailing while saying goodbye to his granddaughter, yet it was within the norm. However, when he nearly crushed Haruno's ribs with a parting embrace and mumbled something about how he was looking forward to seeing her again, she was unsure what to do. She awkwardly patted him on the back and replied in a similar, though more reserved manner. She was fond of the First Hokage, for he was not a man to be disliked, but she was baffled by his emotionality. Thanks to getting to know Hashirama, she had begun to understand Naruto better. The ninja world was too cruel for its inhabitants to force themselves to be serious, and fighting the grim system seemingly required humour and laughter. Her heart was breaking as she saw Uzumaki say goodbye to his father. She could see he was trying not to sob in a last attempt to maintain his image of a tough young man, but his façade was crumbling. Minato watched his son with loving eyes and whispered something, but Sakura refused to overhear - this was a moment between two family members and she had no desire to spoil it. Sarutobi then apologised to the teenager for not providing him with sufficient care and congratulated him on becoming a ninja more formidable than any other. Hashirama continued his festival of ridiculous goodbyes and Sakura had to forcibly stop him from hugging Naruto, whose body had not yet fully recovered from his fight with Sasuke. Meanwhile, Tobirama stood nearby with his arms crossed. Sakura knew it was probably pointless what she was about to do, but she approached him and bowed.

‘I sincerely apologise for my disrespect, _Nidaime-sama'_ , she spoke formally. ‘The war caused my emotions to spiral out of control. When we next meet you will not be able to remember my apology, but I would like to part without resentment on either side.’

‘I must admit I found your criticism somewhat... refreshing’, he answered slowly. ‘I kept an eye on you for the two weeks since the war ended. I will put my trust in my brother's judgement and consider you not to be a threat to the safety of the village.’

‘May I, therefore, consider my apologies accepted?’, she asked, unable to hide the uncertainty in her voice.

‘It would appear so’, he replied with a slight smirk. ‘A remarkably bizarre person you are, Sakura Haruno. One minute you have murderous intent coming out of you, and the next you are genuinely apologizing to me, yet I still sense your hostility. It appears as though talent goes along with madness.’

_Alright, I honestly cannot tell if I am being complimented or insulted_ , she thought. _Probably both._

‘Tobirama, are you prepared to copy my memories?’, asked Shodaime, having finally gotten over the whole situation and at the same time preventing Sakura from inquiring about Tobirama's intentions.

‘At any given moment’, he responded. ‘First, however, I must apply an adjustment. Sakura Haruno, do you happen to carry the kunai I originally gave you?’

‘Yes, I do’, she said and hastily detached the pouch. 

Tobirama skillfully took the weapon in his hand and in a single motion obliterated it, leaving only some ash. Sakura could not help but think it was a waste to have such a finely decorated weapon destroyed. The Second Hokage prepared two similarly beautiful blades with previously attached pieces of paper. He had no intention of revealing this to anyone, but the first kunai he had prepared contained no sealed memories. His distrust towards this woman caused him to check if she, left on her own with a source of knowledge that could potentially threaten the village, would attempt to make use of it. She passed his test. He noted that she constantly kept his pouch with her and periodically checked to ensure its contents were not missing. At first, he doubted the likelihood of her plan succeeding, but she seemed like a bright and insightful person. Tobirama was impressed with her work ethic, the respect she got from patients and her medical expertise. He could establish his opinion not only on the battlefield but he also monitored her in the hospital to acquire the foundations for his positive assessment. Blindly accepting someone else's view without investigating the matter on his own was not in his nature.

‘To spare you the hassle, I will make an updated copy of my memories’, he explained and Sakura's keen gaze made him wonder if she had seen through his actions. ‘There is a possibility that even retrieving my memories will not cause me to trust you outright. I wish to reduce the chances of this scenario occurring. Now, _anija_ , come closer.’

Tobirama first made a copy of his brother's recollection of his life in an attempt to have a good grasp of the situation. For a fortnight he monitored the tiniest of details to make sure his past self version would realise he was not under genjutsu. He observed people and their attire, changes to language and architecture. He tasted modern cuisine and visited the time-ravaged graves of his siblings. He spoke with civilians and with ANBU. He demanded an explanation from _Rokudaime_ about the Root and felt disappointed by his former disciple's actions. While he had always advocated for a strong Konoha, Danzō had taken the wrong path to achieve that goal. All these conversations and insights opened his eyes to the possibility the medic might be correct. Suddenly an idea so obvious occurred to him that he scolded himself for not thinking of it sooner. He completed the seal, put one of the kunai back and turned to Sakura.

‘How do you feel about the possibility of me remaining in Konoha until you have perfected the technique with my assistance?’, he asked and promptly got amused by the look of genuine shock on the woman's face. ‘I have seen more than enough to have confidence in your abilities. I do believe you would have handled it without my support, but I have objectively far greater experience.’

‘I also wish to remain here a little longer’, interrupted Hashirama. ‘How come nobody told me that this was an option?’

‘Unlike you, I have no intention of spending my time here being entertained’, snapped Tobirama in response. ‘ _Anija,_ shut up and let me finish talking.’

‘Have you delayed bringing up this suggestion to me to coerce me into apologising, _Nidaime-sama_?’, she inquired with her eyebrows furrowed. 

‘Perhaps’, he smirked; well, it was not true, but the whole conversation was considerably more entertaining than he could have expected. ‘Nevertheless, what is your decision?’

‘I would be foolish to reject your help’, Sakura responded with no hesitation. ‘I aim to alter the past, not to go down in history as an inventor.’

‘Sakura-chan, what's this all about? What kind of "changing the past"? Dad, why didn't you tell me anything? You knew, didn't you?’, asked Naruto, confusion clear in his words. ‘What does the old man Second have to do with it? Do you want to go back in time? But you will come back, right?’

_Shit._

‘Naruto, I…’, she began, but she had no idea how to convey it gently.

‘Can I come with you?’, Uzumaki inquired, breaking her heart. ‘You can't just go away on your own!’

‘Kakashi comes with me, you have to stay here and become the next Hokage’, she stated in one breath.

‘What about Sasuke?’, Naruto continued to unknowingly inflict pain on her. ‘And why are you calling sensei only by his name?’

‘Quit interrupting, brat!’, Tobirama thundered, clearly out of patience. 

‘But Sakura- _chan_ …’, he started arguing but became silent when his father placed a recently healed hand on his shoulder.

Sakura hated herself for being completely oblivious to Naruto's feelings. She was aware her mission had priority, but she decided she could have thought of ways to talk to her former teammate about it beforehand. As a child he had been harmed by fate and the village, he had been unable to make friends, and just when things seemed to be getting better he received such devastating news. While there was no close relationship between them it was only fitting that he be informed if only due to the fact they were on a squad together. Ironically, she had no way to turn back time, at least not at the moment. Tobirama's reaction, on the other hand, was understandable to her. She desperately clung to the belief her experiences had not changed her, but now she could see more accurately - she had matured sooner than Naruto and she found his naiveté frustrating and laughable. Hashirama and he were alike, but contrary to Naruto, the First Hokage was never naïve. He had been a hopeful realist.

‘Forgive me, Naruto’, she whispered with guilt heavy on her heart. ‘I am doing this for you.’

‘So what's the difference between you and goddamn Obito?!’, he exclaimed angrily. ‘He also spewed some bullshit about changing the world while hurting others!’

‘Naruto, don't you dare compare Sakura to Obito’, Rokudaime warned him, but to no avail.

‘Right. At least Obito didn't constantly need someone to defend him’, Uzumaki snapped and silence fell.

The Hokages awkwardly observed the situation, not sure how to react to the young man's outburst. Sakura, on the other hand, stared at him blankly.

‘Say something, damn you!’, yelled Naruto, grabbed her by the shoulders and shook her. ‘Sakura- _chan_!’

The young woman took a deep breath. Uzumaki had known nothing about her, he was perpetually fixated on Sasuke as his rival and saw her only as a potential romantic interest. He was unaware of her friendship with Hatake, which was why she only addressed him by his first name. He was not privy to the fact that her taijutsu had been perfected by its master. He was oblivious to her training with Kurenai which brought out her illusion abilities. He had no idea of the hours she spent over scrolls in the library. He had heard nothing about the exhausting medical training. He only saw her hit the ground with her fist a few times and was surprised, but that was it. She was sick of being treated like an insignificant addition to Team Seven. However, she was aware that it was not the appropriate time or place for this conversation.

‘Naruto, not right now, ple-’, she began but was promptly interrupted. 

‘Have you stopped loving Sasuke because of Kakashi- _sensei_?!’, he shouted and now Sakura had enough.

‘I'm trying to save your dignity and you're spouting bullshit like this?!’, she finally snapped, but immediately remembered she was surrounded by six Hokages. ‘Please forgive me, Tsunade-shishō, honourable Hokages. I should not have given in to my emotions. Again.’

‘Nah, cannot blame you’, sighed Tsunade and hit Naruto in the head. ‘You drive my finest apprentice off balance and spoil Hokages’ farewell?! You should be ashamed of yourself, Naruto!’

‘So... I apologise on behalf of my son’, Minato grinned sheepishly and scratched his neck. ‘Had I been given the chance to parent him, perhaps he would have been less temperamental.’

The whole scene was utterly embarrassing and Sakura felt like living in solitude as a recluse on the other side of the globe. Being accused of having an affair with Kakashi immediately upon hearing the suggestion that she is weak? Naruto had a right to feel hurt, but at that moment he had outdone himself. More pressing matters than childish infatuations were at stake. His whole world revolved around the Uchiha. It had been the same for her - eight years earlier. Since she first experienced actual training, her priorities were altered. Once she abandoned her childish dreams and started setting goals for herself, she became a proper kunoichi. She was no longer that girl whose only personality trait was her worship of Sasuke. Sakura now was a powerful woman. Haruno was a medic who had saved more lives than she had taken, yet was capable of killing with ease. She knew numerous methods to relieve pain and even more methods of inflicting it. Two jōnins and two Kages trained her. Naruto's words were like a spit in her face. 

‘I would be very grateful if we could put this situation behind us’, she said; the assurances it was not her fault and Minato's repeated apologies calmed her somewhat. ‘Your help during and after the war was of inestimable value.’

‘We place our trust in you, Sakura Haruno and Kakashi Hatake’, Hashirama declared and hugged them both. ‘I await our next encounter. Tobirama, take care of those youngsters!’

‘Hatake, you have become an incredible man, and now you are about to accomplish great things together with your student’, said Sarutobi calmly. ‘I am proud of the road you have taken.’

‘Kakashi, you were a brilliant student, and now you are an even more brilliant man’, whispered Namikaze with a genuine smile. ‘You are the pride of Team Minato. And Sakura, apologies again about Naruto! I have no idea what has gotten into him!’

‘ _Yondaime-sama_ , no harm was done and no need to apologise’, she assured him and let Naruto have the last words in private.

Hashirama immediately proceeded to say goodbye to his granddaughter again, this time not even being able to hold back the tears. It must have occurred to him this time nothing would delay his departure, for he acted even more miserable than before. He mumbled something about little Tsuna, pride, Will of Fire, and alcohol. As everyone was bidding each other farewell, she felt a little lonely. She considered it silly since seconds earlier she had the attention of everyone present on her. Still, she was uncomfortable, so she walked over to Tobirama, who was peering through the window.

‘This situation just now…’, she began and cringed instantly.

‘You handled it well’, Tobirama interrupted. ‘The brat is the one at fault.’

‘Nevertheless, I wish to apologize for the disturbance’, she said and the man turned to face her.

‘Do not ever apologize for anything that is not your fault’, the Second Hokage instructed. ‘And certainly not more than once.’

Instinctively, she wanted to apologize for that as well but refrained from doing so. Instead, she nodded as a sign of comprehension. She wondered how he would respond if she were to ask him for assistance in mastering water techniques. He did not seem like someone who would refuse to teach, but she was unsure if these circumstances would be fitting. After all, they were about to create something that could potentially change the world. Maybe it would work if she justified it by the need to acquire the skills to be able to fight after moving to the past? Besides, he once had a genin team under his care, so he was unlikely to mind acting as a teacher. She still felt resentment towards him because of what she had learned from the historical records, but she could not deny his talent. Plus, there was the fact he offered to lend her a hand. Perhaps he was not as bad as she had imagined?

‘Quit stalling, _anija_!’, Tobirama barked and impatiently moved toward his brother, hitting Sakura with his shoulder. ‘There are urgent matters for me to attend.’

Yeah. Maybe he actually was so bad, after all.


	13. considerate orders

Naruto seemed to have forgotten about the situation that occurred when bidding Hokages farewell, so Sakura decided not to bring up the subject. Perhaps it would have been better if she had, however. She was still enraged by his implication that she had stopped loving Sasuke because Kakashi had appeared on the scene. The reality was that she was unsure if she ever truly felt anything for the Uchiha, or if she had held onto the infatuation for a little too long. Hatake was a friend to her, and she hoped that Naruto's reckless comments would not have damaged their bond. What if someone found out Sakura knew what his face looked like? A scandal could erupt and the Hokage's image would be tainted. She believed that Uzumaki should learn to keep his mouth shut and acquire some civility. Had she been meaner, she could have used her position to punish him for defamation. What affected her most was the underestimation of her abilities. She had no kekkei genkai nor demon buddy to enhance her strengths and make dying nearly impossible. All she had was her hard work and brilliant instructors. 

Tobirama had settled into the Senju compound, which was currently inhabited only by Tsunade. Upon inquiring his grandniece about where Sakura lived so they could begin laying the groundwork for the technique, he was taken by surprise. The kunoichi resided in an underground part of the hospital, originally intended for employees who worked double shifts. Until now, he had assumed that the woman was not coming home due to the sheer amount of work at the hospital after the war. Tsunade explained that the young woman claimed it to be convenient for her, but in reality, she had nowhere else to live after her parents gave her an ultimatum - remain a kunoichi and move out of the house or give up her ninja career. Yet at the same time, she politely declined an offer to live in one of the empty houses in the Senju district, reasoning that the buildings needed to be kept empty in case of a natural disaster or another event that would leave some of the villagers homeless. After her home was demolished during Pain's invasion, she requested to hold off on reconstructing it to save resources to rebuild the civilian property. She constantly had some excuse at hand. The plethora of critical cases in the hospital had her staying close by. She needed to watch over the new medics taken on. The ninja's return from missions had been announced and she needed to be ready. On the other hand, it was no surprise Sakura paid little attention to where she slept. Her day was full of action. In the mornings she trained with Hatake for several hours even before dawn. While on duty, her tasks included not only taking care of patients, but also handling complaints and commercial offers for medical equipment. As Kakashi's advisor, she frequently had to run between the Hokage Tower and the hospital to balance her responsibilities. If she managed to find some spare time, she spent it studying. Cooking was too time-consuming for her to indulge in and she typically bought pre-made meals or took a slightly too high dose of military pills.

This did not sit well with him one bit. Even he, a kid raised in an era of constant wars, had had a relatively safe home in his childhood. It seemed reasonable for him to offer her a place in the Senju district. Under normal circumstances, he would be reluctant to have a non-clan member living in this space, but this was not the usual setting. So in the evening, he waited for her at the staircase leading to the underground, but she did not show up there for more than half an hour after her shift ended. He decided to investigate. Tobirama touched the floor and instantly sensed Sakura sitting alone in the office she shared temporarily with the Hokage. Without knocking, he walked in and found the kunoichi among books not related to medical topics. Among the covers, he spotted the book that he personally had used more than once to develop new techniques. It contained hundreds of symbols associated with specific properties of a particular jutsu. Though Tobirama was not an easily excited man, he felt a pleasant thrill at the thought of the incoming challenges. In the past, sometimes he found himself locked in the office for a few days in a fit of creative mania. Later he had to recover from these periods, but his reanimated body was not constrained by the need for sleep or nutrition. While he did not enjoy the thought that this kunoichi was ahead of him in her preparations, he was also delighted to see her dedication and sincere interest. Truth be told, in his time he had no one to share his passion with. He was regarded as a somewhat deranged genius. In his mind he was already processing the discussions he could have from the next day with Sakura. Some people viewed Tobirama as a stoic, but in reality he did express little to no emotion simply because few things truly mattered to him. Had he been able to devote his entire life to research, the smile would probably never have left his lips. 

‘Good evening, _Nidaime-sama_!’, she exclaimed nervously, got up and tried unsuccessfully to suppress a yawn. 

‘Why are you here?’, he asked, not bothering with pleasantries.

‘Because I work here, _Hokage-sama_ ’, she replied dumbly. ‘Oh. I get it. I decided to educate myself on the subject of sealing and this room has better light for reading.’

‘The buildings in the Senju estate have far superior illumination’, he announced and turned around to leave the office. ‘Come. I will assist you in gathering your belongings.’

Sakura was not sure what had just occurred, but she knew upsetting the grumpy Senju was hazardous. That was why she merely picked up a stack of books and notes, turned off the light and followed him. Without a word, the man took the things she was carrying. She looked at him questioningly, but no explanations seemed to follow, so she obediently went down to her quarters. Tobirama was willing to help her collect her possessions. Those were modest, though. Sakura packed some identical black clothes, ninja gear, a blanket, hygiene products, food items, an even larger stack of books and a framed picture. He had not managed to get a closer look, but it seemed the photograph depicted her team. The room itself was ridiculously small. It contained a frameless mattress and a bedside table. He assumed the door in the corner led to the bathroom. He wondered how long Haruno had been living in that pitiful hole when just being there was clearly an affront to her dignity. 

‘Hand me the books’, he ordered.

A huge pile of books obstructed his view, but he still made his way out of the hospital swiftly and confidently. The night shift receptionist shot Sakura a concerned glance; well, one rarely saw the Chief Medic leaving with all her items in the company of a dead Hokage. Then again, perhaps the woman's appearance attracted attention even more than Tobirama Senju at her side. Her eyes seemed to have lost their shine, and vast dark circles were visible beneath them. One could risk saying that it was hard to tell in whom of the two there was more life in that moment. The Second was not certain exactly what the pills he had seen in her hands several times over the course of his observation time were, but it definitely was nothing healthy. Her fatigue was obviously not just due to lack of sleep or because of physical exhaustion. He made a decision to ask about it the next day, and should he have received an evasive answer, he would turn to his grandniece for clarification. Considering the fact Sakura tended to look around suspiciously at all times before putting that strange substance in her mouth, it could have been something forbidden. Being an excellent sensor, he instantly observed that taking such a pill rapidly restored her chakra to its full capacity.

‘You may pick any building you prefer’, he said only when they reached their destination. ‘I see you are eager to work, but you need to rest. I specifically placed you here to ensure that our collaboration is more fluid. Unless your schedule has changed, you should have the day off tomorrow. Expect me at approximately ten o'clock.’

Sakura was aware of the fact that she had been watched by Tobirama for two weeks, but to hear him shamelessly utilizing the knowledge acquired this way was unforeseen. She chose the smallest of the buildings as close to the gate as possible, presumably designed for the ninja on guard duty. Tobirama nodded in acknowledgement and opened the door with his elbow, then set the stack of books on the floor. The kunoichi looked around the interior of the room. All the furnishings were wooden, which made her assume that when rebuilding the damaged parts, they wanted to keep the original appearance. The kitchen equipment, however, was modern, so she was able to put her food in the fridge. She tried not to make any unnecessary movements so as not to let it be known that she was incredibly exhausted. It was pointless around someone as observant as Nidaime, yet she attempted it anyway. Well, it took no genius to notice her weariness. She stumbled a few times. Periodically her gaze would hang on a random point in space. She asked to repeat sentences multiple times due to losing concentration. Tobirama was on the verge of knocking her out and moving her to her bed throughout watching her forcibly try to arrange her things. For a medic, she was extremely reckless with her health. She definitely needed a reprimand, but not in this condition. He was almost positive she would not recall a single word anyway.

'Rest', he spoke simply and looked into her eyes to clearly convey the message. 'You are to retire to bed as quickly as possible.'

‘Your body experiences no pain, so fatigue probably does not affect it either’, she remarked, having put her belongings aside. ‘Therefore, I know for a fact you will not sleep. I do hope you will not begin work without me.’

‘Had I done so, I would have merely followed your example’, he replied with a barely visible smile, looking at her notes spilling out of the pile. ‘I will say it again - rest, Haruno.’

Having said these words, he left her new place of residence. The war was over, yet every day was getting more and more bizarre for Sakura. The last thing she expected was the intrusion of Tobirama Senju in her workplace. The pinnacle of everything, however, was when he practically announced to her that she was to move. No greeting, no explanation. She only learned of his intentions when they arrived at their final destination. The medic had planned to read the literature acquired in the library just a bit more, but two issues stood in her way. First, Tobirama would surely be monitoring her chakra fluctuations, given how he was pushing for her to rest. And secondly, she was damn tired. The bed she found in her new home was tiny but far more comfortable than the one she had slept on in the hospital. She wondered if the Second had foreseen that she would choose this building, as the bedding had already been prepared. Sakura slipped under the fluffy duvet and added her favourite blanket. Not even a minute had passed before she fell asleep. However, her dreams have not been of the pleasant sort and she had no way to snap out of them.

* * *

The powerful surges of chakra in her new bedroom finally rouse her out of her sleep. Reflexively, she reached for the kunai hidden under her pillow, but recognized the familiar presence and withdrew her hand. The silver-haired ninja instantly noticed she had awakened and he sat down at her bedside. He placed his hand on her forehead, and its soothing warmth eased her anxiety level at once. Nightmares were not unheard of among shinobi, but Sakura experienced them for the first time. She dreamt of an Akatsuki member ripping out the hearts of warriors, of Madara's failed transformation, of those she failed to save. Kakashi, who was currently stroking her hair in a calming manner, had been experiencing such problems as well. She inhaled deeply several times and kept repeating until her breathing evened out.

'I felt your chakra was acting in a weird way, so I came', he explained. 'You didn't mention that you were moving to the Senju compound, but it's definitely an improvement.'

'The Second just barged into my office and basically announced that he was going to help me gather my stuff', Sakura complained and sat up. 'Can you imagine that?'

'I would say I can't, but we're talking about the Second, so I can imagine, after all', he smirked. 'I almost stepped on your notes along the way. Were you in such a hurry that you had to leave them on the floor?'

'I was too damn tired to put them in any sort of order', Sakura confessed and flopped back on the bed. 'I depend on the soldier pills way too much.'

'Do you have any food here that isn't an instant soup?', he asked and already knew the answer. 'Tell you what. Hold on a second.'

Before Sakura managed to utter even a word of protest, Kakashi was gone. She smiled to herself and stood up, reminding herself that she had not even showered before bed. She grabbed fresh clothes and toiletries, then locked herself in the bathroom. The hot stream of water brought her back to her feet. She washed off her sweat after a full day's work and a horrific night's dream. It had only been a few hours of sleep, but her body was already adapted to such short periods of rest, so there was no point in going back to bed. Haruno had not bothered to dry her hair; she simply changed into a clean set of clothing and left the room. She could smell the scent of fried eggs. Kakashi was in the middle of preparing a meal without a facemask, but wearing an apron that he had apparently taken with him from home. The kunoichi had always been the one to cook for Kakashi when he was feeling unwell, but now the roles were reversed. Sakura reached for the teapot to brew some hot beverage, but Kakashi gently slapped her hand away.

'Sit still and let the master work', he spoke with feigned expression of self-importance. 

'As you wish', she laughed quietly. 'Hey, Kakashi, thank you for coming. That means a lot to me.'

'There's no need to mention it, Sakura', he assured. 'You would do the same for me, as you have proven more than once.'

Soon a plate full of warm food was in front of her along with tea nearby. Kakashi would not be himself if he did not prepare a serving for himself as well, so they both busied themselves with eating. The woman could not help but glance at him every now and then.

'Something wrong?', Kakashi asked, having noticed her unusual behaviour.

'No, it's just awfully weird to see you eating without a mask', she answered honestly.

'Awfully weird? Wow, now I'm wounded', he whined jokingly. 'What happened with the incredibly eye-catching sensei?'

'I don't know, never heard of him', she laughed again and suddenly stopped. 'Ah, shit. Lord Second will bury me alive tomorrow. He told me to rest and I'm sure he sensed I'm no longer asleep.'

'Well', he said and reached to pat her back. 'It's been great knowing you.'

Definitely a scolding awaited her. At the very least.


	14. first steps and ever more parallels

No more wanting to sleep any longer, Sakura busied herself with organizing her notes after finishing her meal. Kakashi sat down next to her on the floor and examined the symbols written on the paper with curiosity. He had never thought about the specifics of sealing techniques. The ones he used were prepared in advance by the Sealing Division. The development of new techniques required considerable effort and time. He took one of the sheets of paper in his hand and noticed that next to the written markings were their explanations. He raised his eyebrows as he saw the elaborate symbols relating to travel, route, movement and other similar concepts. The meanings of the markings were almost synonymous, but the symbols themselves were completely different. On another sheet of paper, he found words such as mirror, reverse, undo. The next note contained an unfinished mind map. Apparently, Sakura was in a hurry since she had not completed it. He took a look at the words and immediately understood why she was writing out the meanings of the symbols. Change, alteration, modification. Protection, preservation, shield. Acceleration, swiftness, haste. Knowledge, memories, awareness. Constancy, stillness, unmoving. Strength, enhancement, amplification. Hatake realized that creating a new jutsu based on sealing required taking all variables into account to ensure the user's safety. There was no doubt that the more complex the seal, the more chakra was necessary to activate it. 

‘Isn't 'constancy' conflicting with 'movement'?’, he asked. 

‘Well, yes, it is’, Sakura admitted, continuing to sort through the papers. ‘But I need a way to ensure we don't end up in some random place.’

‘And what about designing a tool to minimize chakra loss instead of adding another component to the seal?’, he suggested and his friend froze. ‘I think we should keep the number of marks as low as possible.’

‘Damn, why didn't I think of that earlier?’, she murmured and slapped her forehead. ‘Kakashi, you're a genius. The problem is, I don't think we have anyone who can handle such a task any time soon.’

‘Perhaps Kabuto would be up to it?’, Hatake replied and immediately continued before Sakura had time to yell at him. ‘Look, when Ibiki and Inoichi interrogated Sasuke, they found out that Itachi had cast some powerful jutsu on Kabuto. Now he's a changed man. Otherwise, I wouldn't have let him work at the damn orphanage.’

‘Say what you want, I don't trust him’, she remarked. ‘Since he changed once, he can do it again. ’

‘No offence, but you sound like the Second right now’, Kakashi stated.

‘Well, you have a point’, she sighed. ‘Fine, we'll ask Kabuto for help, but I refuse to give him any information beyond what is essential and he is to be kept under constant surveillance.’

‘Oh hell, it sounds even worse!’, Rokudaime laughed and shook his head. ‘Don't you see the parallel between your behaviour and Nidaime's decisions concerning the Uchiha?’

Sakura blinked. Damn. Hatake was right. She had only recognized the hypocrisy in her behaviour the moment Kakashi had pointed it out to her. She sighed heavily and felt even more regretful about the sense of moral high ground with which she had explained Tobirama's mistakes. In truth, they were very much alike and Haruno had no right to question his decisions when she had made virtually the same mistakes. It was simple to judge someone else's actions without being in the same situation yourself. Who knows? Maybe Sakura would also be guided by caution when assigning a place and role for the Uchihas. Maybe she would also have refused to hand over the leadership to someone from that clan. Politics was tougher than it seemed. Sometimes choices unfavourable to one side had to be made to improve the lives of the other. And tragic errors did happen. It is part of human nature to be prone to errors. She was tired of these unsettling thoughts. Instinctively, Sakura reached into her pocket to grab a soldier pill, but Kakashi grabbed her wrist.

‘A more sensible solution would be coffee’, he remarked and stood up. ‘You should get rid of your entire supply of these pills so you won't be tempted.’

‘They're lifesavers on double shifts’, she argued weakly. ‘You’re right, though.’

A few minutes later, Kakashi emerged from the kitchen with two mugs of beverage. The hot coffee was incomparably better tasting than the gross pills. While it failed to boost chakra levels, it did reduce fatigue. Seeing the sky begin to take on a pinkish hue, she glanced at the clock. In four hours Tobirama should be arriving. Sakura was unsure if she was prepared to spend time with a man who most likely had plans to scold her for ignoring orders. Well, as a matter of fact, could she be sure it was an order? He had simply told her to rest. He never specified the time she was required to spend on it. At least that was her way of comforting herself.

‘Wait, why are you still here?’, Haruno asked and the surprised Hokage gave her a confused look. ‘Don't tell me you dumped all your responsibilities on Shikamaru again.’

‘I do have a legitimate reason, though’, he replied and after a moment's thought added the important part. ‘This time’.

‘At this rate, it will be Shikamaru who becomes the Sixth Hokage, and you will be demoted to an advisor’, Sakura complained.

‘Can't say I'd mind’, he spoke and shrugged. ‘I'd find better things to do.’

Both of them laughed softly. Sakura honestly could not blame Kakashi for resenting his office. The role of Hokage was neither easy nor pleasant. Of course, it guaranteed status and respect, but also many concerns and difficulties. The welfare of the entire village rested on the Hokage's shoulders. He could have as many advisors and assistants as he wanted, but any failure was ultimately his fault. Taking responsibility for that much was tiresome and taxing on one's mental state. Sakura was nevertheless glad to see Kakashi not so fixated on the Hokage label. He had enough problems of his own that the Council did not care about. She had become familiar enough with Hokage's work that she understood Tobirama increasingly better. Under such pressure, it was easy to commit mistakes. 

‘Perhaps the Second will happen to know something about the seal on your eye?’, she wondered, changing the subject. 

‘Oh, so you haven't forgotten after all’, answered Kakashi. ‘I'm not saying I thought you'd forgotten about me, but there's been so much going on lately.’

‘I checked everywhere I had access to, but I didn't find a single word about it’, she admitted. ‘I felt useless, so I didn't even mention it. I can't even look at that seal since it's at the back of your eyeball. I was thinking of asking Inoichi- _san_ for help.’

‘You can’t say that Konohagakure's jōnin is useless’, he declared and upon seeing her baffled stare, he turned pale. ‘Uh. I forgot to tell you about the promotion, didn't I? That would explain why you don't wear a uniform.’

‘Well, that's good to know’, she spoke slowly and after a pause, she hit him on the head. ‘Kakashi Hatake, you utter moron! You're the damn Hokage and you can't remember who you gave the promotion to?!’

‘Well, nobody needs to know. I sort of forgot about any formal event, so you didn't miss anything’, he smiled sheepishly. ‘You were promoted along with Shikamaru Nara, Neji Hyūga, Shino Aburame and Ino Yamanaka after Pain’s invasion. They don't know yet. Sorry to ruin your surprise.’

‘I could have figured it was surprising that two chūnins were advisors to the Hokage’, Sakura sighed. ‘You’re the epitome of chaos, Kakashi. Are you going to explain yourself somehow or do we accept the version that the decision was made after the war?’

‘The latter’, he decided predictably. ‘We can tell Shikamaru, though.’

For the next few hours, they went through the books together. Most of them Sakura was only able to get because of her position as the Hokage's right-hand woman. They marked interesting passages with bookmarks instead of highlighting, so as not to damage the valuable collection in any way. The book that caught Kakashi's attention the most was one with a simple cover. He took it in his hand and almost let it go when he saw the signature. It was Mito Uzumaki's journal, in which she recorded her sealing discoveries. Her clan was renowned for its superior fūinjutsu. When he wanted to look through further pages, an unpleasant surprise awaited him. Apart from the title page, the journal was protected by a seal. Well, that was to be expected from a master of sealing arts.

‘Hey, I think I can try to break that seal’, said Sakura. ‘That textbook I got my information from about the meaning of the symbols demonstrated how to do it. Let me give it a go.’

Hatake handed his friend the book and curiously watched her further actions. The medic opened the first sealed page and examined it carefully. This particular type required the construction of a counter-measure consisting of the exact opposite symbols. Excited to use her newly acquired knowledge, she ran for the ink and scroll. Fortunately, the characters used by Mito were quite unambiguous, so she quickly managed to come up with a workaround. The seal consisted of the signs of locking, concealment, secrecy and submission. She scrawled on paper markings symbolising opening, transparency, truth and resolve. She then pressed the paper to the page and released some chakra. 

_‘Fūinjutsu: Kai!_ ’, she spoke and anxiously lifted the scroll.

She smiled in disbelief when she saw the seal had disappeared.

‘It worked!’, she yelled and got up only to jump for joy. ‘Kakashi, it worked!’

‘I didn't doubt for a second that you would succeed’, he said, pride visible on his features. 

Abruptly, the man pulled the mask back over his face. Sakura had no time to ask what had caused such behaviour - there was no need to, anyway. One second later, the Second Hokage appeared in the middle of the room with a look of displeasure on his face. The man was not wearing his _happuri_ , so his hair was messy. His attire was simple - a turtleneck, sandals and trousers, all black. Sakura barely registered that this sudden intrusion required placing a seal in her living room. Well, technically it was not even her house, so she should not feel any outrage, but still, Nidaime violated her privacy at that moment. Seeing his look of disapproval, however, she dared not protest.

‘Haruno, you were instructed to rest yesterday, yet your chakra started fluctuating several minutes after my departure’, he said in a defiant tone. ‘Would you care to explain this?’

‘I had a nightmare about the war, _Nidaime-sama_ ’, Sakura explained dutifully. ‘The intense emotional response of my consciousness caused my chakra to become unstable. _Rokudaime-sama_ noticed something was amiss and came to support me. I was unable to sleep afterwards, so I decided to utilise this time productively.’

‘You were severely exhausted yesterday. I presume it may have some connection to the substance you regularly take to increase your chakra levels’, he continued, not commenting on her words. ‘Explain.’

‘These pills are called _Hyōrōgan._ I prepare them with herbs that are natural chakra stimulants’, she answered and handed him one of the pills. ‘Their consumption is frowned upon because three days after taking the last dose the chakra is immediately depleted. ANBU orders them from me.’

‘Any long-term side effects?’, Tobirama inquired, carefully examining the pill.

‘None that I am aware of’, she spoke and her reply seemed to satisfy Senju.

For a moment it seemed as if Tobirama had finished his questioning. The man continued to look intently at the pill handed to him. He pulled out a kunai to incise the object and brought it closer to his eye. He placed the cut off piece of the pill on his tongue and grimaced slightly. Even such a small portion of the substance boosted his chakra beyond the limit, however, it tasted terrible. Probably due to lack of proper equipment, he did not continue his examination any longer. Or it was the taste that deterred him from further experimentation. The former Hokage packed the pill into a small case and hid it in his pocket. Kakashi thought the man just wanted the nastiness out of his eyes and found himself amused by the idea.

‘ _Rokudaime_ , what is your reason for being here instead of the office?’, he questioned Hatake; now it was his time to be tormented.

‘My assistant has temporarily taken over my duties’, he replied. ‘I am aiding Sakura in her research.’

Nidaime nodded in acknowledgement and sat down on the floor, so the other two did the same. He picked up the papers and studied their contents. With a thoughtful expression, he rubbed his chin, and Haruno involuntarily turned her attention to the red markings on his face. Since they had not faded when touched, they were most likely tattoos. When he put the notes aside, Sakura was just waiting to be laughed at, but that never happened. 

‘A decent groundwork’, he finally declared and Sakura let the air out of her lungs. ‘You quickly grasped the concept of producing seals. Much more work lies ahead, but right now I am positive you have talent.’

‘Thank you, _Nidaime-sama_ ’, she said, shaking with excitement.

It was one thing to receive praise from Kakashi or Tsunade, and another to hear it from a legendary ninja without whom this village would not exist. Haruno felt a surge of confidence only to realise that the pressure was now on her to maintain this level. She was not planning to slack off, but she was not sure if she would not disappoint the Second.

‘I suggested approaching our new ally, Kabuto Yakushi, for help in developing a device to reduce chakra loss’, spoke Kakashi. ‘That way we would lower the number of marks required.’

‘A follower of that snake Orochimaru?’, he inquired and Kakashi nodded. ‘I have read the report from the Uchiha's interrogation, but I cannot trust that kind of person. However, if you consider this to be the only way, I suggest the utmost caution. Only the necessary details can be provided to him and he shall not be permitted to work with these in our absence.’

The irony was not lost on Sakura. Well, now she could no longer deny Kakashi's words. The analogy between their words was too striking and Hatake knew it too because he sent her a meaningful look.

‘I feel outvoted since Sakura's response was virtually identical’, he smirked. ‘So be it, Lord Second.’

‘It is good to know that at least one reasonably cautious person manages this village’, Tobirama remarked. ‘I find it rather intriguing that the very same person criticised my similar choices earlier, though.’

Nidaime's reaction according to Sakura was the ideal payback to Kakashi for ratting her out. Unfortunately, she also received her share of snide comments.

‘I admit that I had a change of heart’, she began and a hardly visible cocky smirk appeared on Tobirama's face. ‘However, my previous accusations were not unfounded. Furthermore, do you think that discriminating against a whole group of people is equivalent to distrusting one individual, _Hokage-sama_?’

‘According to your past beliefs, you should trust him’, Nidaime crossed his arms. ‘Unlike Uchihas, Yakushi has proven himself to be an ally.’

‘Kabuto is influenced by an unknown technique’, Sakura argued. ‘His aid may be temporary. Although Itachi Uchiha is no longer alive, we have no evidence that his jutsu has no time limit. Sasuke does not know the details of what his brother did.’

Kakashi followed the discussion with interest. Perhaps he would have joined the conversation were it not for the fact that listening to the arguments of these two was amusing. They were both trying to prove their points and insult each other at the same time. He wondered which of them would give up faster. Something was endearing about watching Sakura argue with a shinobi legend as if he were her equal. He soon noticed the Second's eyelid begin to twitch in annoyance and Sakura's fists clench menacingly. It had been entertaining so far, but when he saw Senju's eyes narrow and Haruno cracking her knuckles, he decided to intervene.

‘Lord Second, Sakura, I think that is enough’, Kakashi said loudly and firmly. 

The kunoichi immediately backed off, and it was only because of this that Tobirama relented as well. The discussion was refreshing, albeit infuriating, but there was no point in continuing it when only one side was willing to. It seemed, moreover, this was not the last such quarrel.


	15. painfully awkward

While watching Tobirama and Sakura at work was an enjoyable experience, Kakashi had to return to his duties. He was considered a genius himself and was developing his techniques, but exclusively offensive ones. What the former Hokage and the Chief Medic were working on was of a much more delicate nature. Once he was sure they would not tear each other's throats out if he left them alone, he stopped showing up at Sakura's house so frequently. When working out the seals, the two were in their element and Hatake's presence was neutral to them at best and distracting at worst. Sakura's routine was as follows: training, shift at the hospital, shift at the Hokage Tower, work on technique, sleep. Tobirama pushed for her to give up one of the activities, but she was far too persistent. She cherished each of her roles and had no intention of abandoning any of them. Nevertheless, she considered being Kakashi's friend to be the most crucial of her functions and he was delighted to hear Sakura joyfully tell him about her progress in preparing the technique. Their morning coffee ritual had returned after the war and they both placed great importance on it. Hatake also was unable to shake the feeling of pride that he was the one to become the best friend of Sakura Haruno, a talented kunoichi, a great medic and a marvellous person. 

Eventually, all three decided that Kabuto's assistance would be required when they made failed attempts to construct a chakra amplifier. The young man's peculiar face twisted into a surprisingly pleasant smile when he heard their request and he instantly got to work. He explained his every move and willingly shared his notes, which made Sakura and Tobirama's distrust diminish somewhat. However, they still gave him suspicious glances when they thought he was focusing on something for too long or making excessively detailed notes. At least one of them always sat with Kabuto when he was busy with the device. It seemed he did not feel offended. Once he even said he understood their concerns and had nothing to hide, so he was not bothered. If that was a lie, then Yakushi had missed his calling, as it would indicate excellent acting skills. For the first time in his life, the second Hokage regretted being a sensor when he examined Kabuto's chakra. It was both radiant and slimy at the same time. He was only glad that this skill required concentration, so there was no need for him to constantly endure the sickening sensation. Sakura, on the other hand, was delighted to learn intriguing facts on medical topics. Admittedly, Kabuto had most likely gained this knowledge through unethical means.... well, but why discard the knowledge?

Sakura had a surprising abundance of energy for the amount of work she had to do. She was never late for any deadline and was always immaculately prepared. Once again Senju had to appreciate her work ethic. He also really appreciated the discussions they had and the fact she seemed to always want to know more. He talked to her about the _Hiraishin_ jutsu and how he reached its final form. She in turn shared her ideas about their technique and surprised him when she said Hirashin was her source of inspiration. He was particularly amazed that she had worked out his technique so quickly. Sakura deduced that the Sharingan was unable to read his movements because he shifted to another dimension for a split second while using _Hiraishin_. She was so impressed by this that she resolved to use a similar idea when developing her technique. _Nidaime_ had grown accustomed to her bursts of enthusiasm, but he did not expect that she would decide to take it upon herself to add another responsibility. When they had finished the next stage of work on the technique after three months, Haruno stopped him as he was about to leave. He made no secret of his surprise when she expressed her request.

‘I apologize if this is too straightforward, but would you mind teaching me your _Suiton_ techniques, _Hokage-sama_?’, she asked hopefully and Tobirama somehow could not bring himself to refuse her. ‘I discovered a few years ago that the secret is in the humidity of the air, but I cannot get more than a few drops out.’

‘Believe me, you are close to the solution’, he said with a slight smile. ‘You do not look exhausted, therefore I can demonstrate it for you now.’

‘I would be honoured’, Sakura spoke respectfully and Tobirama was baffled yet again, as he realized that he had not sensed the hostility in her voice for some time now.

Tobirama instructed her to sit on the floor and then did the same thing himself. With eyes shining with excitement, she watched as the Second Hokage effortlessly formed a sphere of water. With skilful movements of his hands, he guided the liquid as he pleased. Sakura was overjoyed, but something kept her thinking. Such a large amount of water could not have come from the air. Then it hit her. She had to use chakra to replicate the small amount of water she had obtained. It was not that she was incapable of extracting more water. The crux was that even a drop was enough. She decided to test her hypothesis and acquired a handful of water from the air and then applied chakra to it. To her surprise, the pillar of liquid began to grow faster than she expected. The water for some reason reacted very potently with chakra. Tobirama sent her a proud smile, which distracted her so badly the water she was manipulating poured over them both. Though she tried to remain serious, seeing the flattened hair of the startled Hokage was too ridiculous. She covered her mouth with her hand to preserve the remnants of her dignity. What she had not expected was the Second Hokage's desire for revenge. She had no time to react - a massive ball of water fell on her head, turning her into a drenched ball of amusement.

‘Lord Second, that’s not fair! Unlike you, I didn't do it on purpose!’, she laughed loudly and squeezed the water out of her hair, forgetting to be ladylike in his presence. ‘Damn, the whole floor is wet now.’

He looked at her with astonishment. The sudden change of attitude caught him by surprise. She had been able to ignite an argument with him, yet she had never laughed in his presence until now. 

‘Oh. Oh, shit. I'm sorry. For that, too. Well, it got pretty awkward’, she blurted out, blushing with embarrassment at a rapid pace and regaining her composure only after several seconds. ‘Please forgive me, _Nidaime-sama_ , I shall no longer-’

‘Tobirama’, he interrupted. ‘It is exhausting when everyone stiffens around me. I am human too and you do not need to speak to me in such a formal manner. I have not felt ordinary for a long time. I suppose I got too used to the respect I had as Hokage.’

‘Oh’, she made a stupid sound and stared at him dumbly. 

‘Which part shocked you so much?’, he inquired with amusement. ‘Me having a name or me being a human?’

‘It's just so... sudden’, she explained and ran her hand through her wet hair with shame. ‘I swore to myself not to treat you or other Kage like living legends, and yet I do exactly that. Besides, you have reprimanded me regarding my lack of respect a few months ago. Forgive me, _Nidaime-sama_.’

‘Tobirama’, he reiterated more bluntly. 

‘Okay’, she uttered and prepared herself mentally. ‘Tobirama...- _sama_.’

‘Tobirama’, he said slowly, obviously poking fun at her.

‘Hey, that's not fair!’, she exclaimed angrily. ‘I've been addressing you with honorifics for so long, and now all of a sudden I'm supposed to switch to a first name just like that?’

‘Oh, you have not added ' _Nidaime_ ' or ' _Hokage_ ' this time’, he remarked. ‘This is a fine beginning. Go on.’

‘You're pushing it, _Nidaime_ ’, she smirked; two could play this game.

‘And I considered you to be a diligent individual’, Senju could not stop himself from dragging out this conversation. ‘Is your progress receding so rapidly?’

‘Tobirama, I'm going to kick your arrogant ass unless you stop with this bullshit!’, she yelled angrily and began to gather chakra in her hand when she realized she had been tricked. ‘Oh, you didn’t.’

‘I did’, he smirked again, a smile simultaneously fitting and strange on his face. ‘I suppose we must bid farewell. Until tomorrow, Haruno.’

He disappeared before she could answer and all that remained was her urge to hit him and the drenched floor. Sakura sighed heavily and got up to fetch a dry cloth. Bloody Senju. 

Another day of the same routine. Training with Kakashi, morning coffee and lively discussion with him, surgery at the hospital, picking up medical equipment, filling out paperwork at the Hokage's office, exchanging jokes with Hatake, making sure he ate lunch, swapping with Shikamaru. She was looking forward to meeting with the Second Hokage because she had another idea. The first testing phase of the technique was nearing and she wanted to present him her carefully planned strategy for conducting those trials. On her way home, she stopped by the grocery shop, which had recently returned to normal functioning. In addition to food for herself, she also thought about Kakashi, who had a lot on his mind lately and was again forgetting to eat for days. She decided to prepare meals for him for the whole week so that he would eat healthily and not feel like he was wasting his time cooking. The staggering amounts of groceries could barely fit into the four huge bags she was carrying with her. She was not surprised to see that the Second Hokage was already waiting for her and looking through her collection of books. 

‘Good evening, _Hokage-sama_!’, she greeted him happily, completely forgetting his request from the previous day. ‘I'll put my groceries away and come right over.’

To her surprise, the man did not reply. She decided to deal with unpacking the purchases first and only then investigate the reason for his silence.

‘ _Hokage-sa_ _ma_?’, she reiterated only for him to turn around swiftly and give her an irritated stare.

‘I was not joking when I asked you to address me by my first name’, he said with anger. ‘Time spent with you is the only thing I have from normal life. I do not need to eat, drink or sleep. I may do that but have no such necessity. The only element of humanity I have left in this form is the urge to interact with another human being, but all you see in me is a stone likeness overlooking Konoha.’

‘Forgive me, Tobirama’, she whispered with genuine concern in her voice. ‘Had I known you needed it, I would have tried not to forget your request.’

‘I should be the one asking for forgiveness’, he protested, regret evident. 

‘Why me?’, Sakura inquired, though she did not know whether she would not make him furious again.

‘You were the first and only person in years to stand up to me’, his explanation was simple. ‘As much as it irked me to no end, it was quite fascinating. I pondered that sentiment for a while and came to realize it was exactly what I required.’

She could understand that. She had not been able to fathom how frustrating it must have been to constantly be in the shoes of a politician, a warrior, and a diplomat with no place for friendship. Sakura knew times were not the same back then, but human nature had not changed. Very few people did well in complete isolation and Tobirama was not one of them. He was always portrayed in the history books as a cold, logical stoic who devoted his entire life to the village. It seemed that in reality he simply had no other choice. She felt sorry for his gruesome background. Those who are at the very top tend to sit there alone. It was also said of Tobirama he was the only Hokage who never had an advisor. Now Sakura wondered if he had deliberately refused to recruit one so that he could get away from the over-respectful people. Yes, he was sometimes unpleasant and sarcastic to the point of pain, but that was his way of being. He was capable of praising someone, he could smile, he knew how to joke. She was unsure what words to use to express her comprehension. Nor did she want to move on from the situation without elaborating on it. What she found to be the simplest and most universal way was a hug. She embraced him tightly, not caring about a potential wrong reaction.

‘Interesting’, he remarked and awkwardly reciprocated the gesture. ‘This body feels no pain, yet I feel your touch. I am grateful, Sakura.’

‘Since you’re surprised by this, you didn’t intend this jutsu to have this effect’, she said, not breaking the hug. ‘Perhaps this process inhibits cyclooxygenase production or otherwise impairs pain perception?’

‘I am not a medical professional and have no idea what you just said’, he admitted reluctantly. ‘Well, except for the perception of pain.’

‘Hey, are you able to get drunk in this body?’, Sakura suddenly inquired and stopped the embrace, leaving Tobirama’s arms painfully empty. ‘Since your chakra is inexhaustible, does using a soldier pill raise its level permanently? I wonder if your blood type matches the one you had when you were alive since it takes someone else's body to revive you. Is holding your breath uncomfortable for you? No, don't try it, you could damage your lungs and not even know it. Oh, sorry. That's what happens when I get too excited about something.’

‘It is fine with me. Continue’, he assured her and meant his words.

‘I know you have a sense of taste because you cringed after tasting my soldier pill’, she spoke reproachfully. ‘Perhaps you'd like some tea? Let's see if the temperature change affects you as well.’

Tobirama had already tried the local cuisine, thus he already knew he could indeed feel the temperature differences, however, he wanted not to spoil Sakura's enjoyment, so he agreed to tea. She held well in the role of a researcher and wanted to uncover as much as possible. This common trait made him feel a connection with her in some way. After just a moment, several mugs of tea at different temperatures stood in front of him. When he confirmed he could tell the difference between the contents of the cups, Sakura was pleased and noted the observation. She was eager to move on to the next tests and suddenly remembered they had a much more crucial assignment than testing the reanimated body.

‘I apologize for this moment of forgetting my responsibilities’, she immediately pulled the scroll out of her bag. ‘And for this sudden change of subject. Let me share my strategy for running the tests with you.’

Tobirama followed her speech but focused more on the notes. They were neat and carefully written. Her strategy included every possible obstacle he could imagine. She proposed writing down the exact time the test would begin in case it turned out that the memories of the time undone were not retained. If that happened, her suggestion was to apply a temporary seal to the mind. To test the effect of the technique on the body, she suggested drawing a line on the hand before the trial to easily see if the body was also returning to its previous state. Here the solution was to have a protective layer of chakra applied to the whole body. The first tests were bound to be conducted on clones. There was a note to ask Naruto for help because of his abundant chakra resources and ability to provide hundreds of samples. The man was positively impressed.

‘Well done, Sakura’, he smiled lightly and reached out to pat her on the shoulder.

His behaviour puzzled Sakura, but she refused to let it show. She figured his unmet need for normal physical contact had prompted the gesture. Still, he noticed a slight tension in her shoulders.

‘I apologize’, he spoke awkwardly and looked to the side. ‘Still getting used to it.’

‘No harm was done, I just didn't see it coming’, she protested and to prove to him that she was okay with it, she grabbed his hand. ‘See? Nothing odd about that.’

Except that everything was odd about it. Tobirama wanted to retreat immediately due to this bizarre sentiment. Such a thing was simply not in his character. He slowly withdrew his hand and nodded as a sign of understanding. He had no desire to offend the kunoichi, but he also wanted to avoid exploring the strange connection he felt. What he decided to do was only allow himself to smile at her. That seemed to bring her joy. However, no more physical contact. He was not cut out for it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I followed you up to where the water's clear  
> You went and left me floating in your atmosphere  
> You brought me up and now I finally see  
> Oh how I'm falling in your gravity  
> I'm falling in your gravity
> 
> ('Gravity' by Fytch)


	16. ever closer to the goal

Sakura frankly had no idea what to make of the Second Hokage's peculiar behaviour. It did not escape her eye how he withdrew his hand when she tried to prove to him there was nothing inherently wrong with physical contact. Could it be that she had offended him? No, rather not. Tobirama was the type of man who would instantly let it be known he was insulted. Perhaps he was simply embarrassed about her straightforward approach? That was far more likely. She felt like smacking herself in the face. She had barely established a working partnership with the Second, and now she was jeopardising her progress. Interacting with someone from a vastly different era was tough. What was now the norm in the present was inappropriate for a young lady to do in Tobirama's time. Had he possibly misinterpreted her actions? Damn. She figured the best course of action would be to forget the whole situation and to pretend nothing of the sort had ever happened. At that moment she felt extremely unprofessional. She resolved to immediately refrain from any physical contact. No ninja should be so casual with his companion. Kakashi's case was something else entirely - they were friends, not mere workmates. Neither of the two realised that the other had come to very similar conclusions.

The device developed by Kabuto was nearly finished. Only a few minor tweaks and details remained to be worked out. Haruno expressed her appreciation for his desire to cooperate and once again apologised to him for her lack of trust. The young man smiled at her reassuringly and stated there was no reason to be sorry. His snake-like face still made her shiver, but she did her best to hide her discomfort. With that, she said goodbye to Yakushi and set off in search of Naruto. The first place she checked was Ichiraku Ramen, but she had failed to find her teammate there. He was not at the training ground or his quarters either. She eventually managed to locate him in the least expected place - the cemetery. He was standing by Hinata's grave with a bouquet. The kunoichi tactfully decided to wait in the distance until Uzumaki finished his visit. She wondered if he merely felt guilty for her death, or if perhaps he reciprocated her weakly guarded feelings. Besides, it was none of her business, and she had no intention of asking Naruto about anything potentially painful. Several minutes later, the teenager left the graveyard area and spotted Sakura himself.

‘Long time no see, Sakura- _chan_ ’, he said quietly - too quietly for his customary manner. ‘Need me for something?’

‘Hey, Naruto. I'm truly sorry to come asking for your help at a time like this, but we require your clones to test our jutsu’, she went straight to the point. ‘I realise that this is insensitive.’

‘No problem’, he replied with a small smile. ‘After you saved my life and attempted to save my dignity in front of the Hokages, I owe you at least that much.’

‘You've matured, Naruto’, Sakura remarked. ‘You’ll make a great Hokage.’

‘Actually, I was considering stepping aside to give way to Sasuke’, he stated and his words stunned Sakura. ‘Let's not delude ourselves: out of the two of us, he's the smarter one.’

‘I was… not expecting this’, she admitted, though her words were a massive understatement. ‘Are you sure you want to give up on your dream?’

‘Dreams don't always come true’, he said and shrugged. ‘I've learned that sometimes it's better to listen to reason.’

Haruno was in awe of the path Naruto had taken. He had changed beyond recognition. His facial features had sharpened and his personality had mellowed. She was unsure whether it was necessarily a beneficial transformation: after all, the image of a hyperactive kid stuck in her mind. They were already seventeen, so they had been adults for a year by current law. The decreased age requirement for ninja made sense - many of them never lived to a ripe old age. She wondered if Naruto would regain his bubbly personality once the past changed. Though she had always scolded him for his immaturity, now she would probably prefer him to continue being naïve and childlike. She snapped out of her musings and explained to Naruto what was required of him during the tests. She ordered him to show up at the gate to the Senju district at eight o'clock. 

The shift at the hospital went by without too much hassle. Sakura had to talk sense into a cranky patient who nearly assaulted a nurse and trashed the hospital room, but that was the only issue. She wrote out the dosages of medication to be administered during the night shift and headed off to the Hokage Tower to perform her duties as an advisor and to bring Kakashi a serving of proper food. Including aubergine, obviously. Hatake gratefully took the meal she had prepared and devoured it in seconds. Together they went over asylum requests, diplomatic visit announcements and mission proposals. Sakura was pleased with the remarkably peaceful course of the day, but that contentment was spoiled by pondering whether something unpleasant awaited her further down the line. Well, she guessed it. As she walked out of the Hokage Tower, she found Sasuke Uchiha waiting for her. Despite the darkness, she instantly recognised his figure radiating with confidence.

‘I will walk you home’, he announced calmly, making Sakura almost drop her bags.

‘Perhaps I heard wrong’, she gave him a chance to explain. ‘What?’

‘I'd like to be your friend’, now a tone of annoyance could be heard in his voice.

‘Our only interaction was that you literally tried to kill me’, Haruno replied plainly, matching the straightforwardness of his words.

‘It doesn't look like Naruto has any problem with it’, he noticed; even in the pitch dark, one could see Sasuke's brow furrowing.

‘Naruto has always had a bond with you, but you don't know me’, Sakura stated. ‘What's got into your head all of a sudden?’

‘I just thought…’, all confidence evaporated from his words. ‘Well, I was convinced I was still of some importance to you.‘

‘I am touched, I truly am’, she whispered. ‘But Sasuke, you need to understand my infatuation is long gone. It's too late for me to befriend you. In a couple of months, I won’t be here anymore.’

‘Oh’, he said dumbly for the first time in his life. ‘Pardon the awkwardness.’

And just like that, he was gone. This ability to vanish in an instant was something extremely useful for ninja due to their lack of social skills, among other things. The power to instantly remove oneself from a social situation was both useful and amusing. Unfortunately, at the moment, Sasuke definitely could not see the hilarity in the entire thing. He looked neither content nor enraged. He seemed puzzled, and one could venture to say that he was upset. It pained Sakura greatly to have to refuse, but she just found it impossible to live for someone else. Someone she no longer loved. Little Sakura would probably faint upon hearing such an offer. The adult Sakura could only admire Sasuke's boldness and hope he would be able to find happiness. All the Uchiha she had the opportunity to meet were prone to dramatics, after all. Still contemplating this puzzling chat, she reached her destination. Naruto was waiting for her sooner than they had arranged, for which she was thankful. She required something to distract her from the painful interaction. The young man greeted her with a grin almost as wide as it had been in their childhood. Sakura invited him into the house and explained to him how she even ended up here in the first place. The story was endlessly amusing to Naruto. They were soon joined by Tobirama and Kabuto led by Kakashi. Well, as a matter of fact, Tobirama had been following Sakura from the moment she left the hospital, but to keep up appearances he waited a bit before entering her house. As the best medic in the village, she had to be under constant protection, according to him. It was common knowledge that eliminating a medic was the first part of a war strategy. When he saw the Uchiha, he was about to reflexively step in, but their interaction was not violent, though not friendly either. 

‘Lord Second, Lord Sixth, Kabuto’, Naruto respectfully bowed to the newcomers, once again surprising Haruno.

‘I presume everyone is acquainted with the strategy for carrying out the tests’, she shifted into her professional mode with ease. ‘I will reiterate the most important points. Tests will be carried out on clones. The clones will be given a reverse version of the seal to use on the return with detailed instructions and will be transported back in time. Naruto will create clones holding the scroll in his hand so that it disappears with them. We will start with a test on a group without markers, seals on consciousness nor a protective layer of chakra. Further elements will be added as necessary. Exact times must be recorded. If the clone does not return within ten minutes, we assume that some protective element is missing. All clear?’

Having heard the confirmation, she asked Naruto to create the first batch of clones. They left the room and locked it so as not to influence the actions of their counterparts from the past and waited for a quarter of an hour. Only after this time had elapsed the clones were to perform the technique. As she expected, the lack of protection prevented them from returning. After ten minutes Naruto called off the clones. To his surprise, their memories did not return to him promptly; it took him a moment to realise that technically he had already obtained them ten minutes earlier. 

‘They had no idea what was going on’, he reported. ‘It's a funny feeling, because I remember very well the noises coming from that room, although there's nothing about it in the notes.’

‘This jutsu is highly risky and potent’, remarked Kabuto. ‘I have faith you will play it well, yet the sheer power of this technique intimidates me. Each decision has an impact on the future and disrupting the natural course of time is dangerous.’

Using the seal proved to be a fine solution to the problem of losing memories. This time the clones were able to return on their own. The clones described the journey as chakra depleting, so Kakashi's idea of getting Kabuto's help proved invaluable. Had it not been for his suggestion, they would have faced another delay of several months. The next group of doppelgangers were given the markers and reported nothing had changed. It was then that Sakura realised: if the clones had de-aged upon travelling, they would have disappeared - after all, they had not existed those few minutes before. This oversight undermined her self-esteem a little, but she was obliged to keep going. Not having to use a protective layer of chakra brought her relief, as she was worried about the possibility of Kakashi losing control of that barrier during time travel and thus suffering a memory fade. Though overall he was far stronger than her, her chakra control was far superior. When she announced the first human trial and volunteered, all the people gathered looked at her hesitantly. It was one thing to send clones and another to experiment on yourself. However, Sakura was too determined to let go and prepared herself for the test. She opened the scroll and was about to infuse chakra into it when Kakashi grabbed her wrist.

‘I’ll do it’, he said in an unobjectionable tone. ‘You oversee the entire project and losing you would make it no longer possible to proceed.’

‘Kakashi, don't do it’, she argued and tried to make him step aside. ‘You're far too valuable to take any chances.’

‘Don’t make me pull my rank on you’, he smiled. ‘Anyway, I'm pretty sure everything will be fine. After all, you created this technique.’

‘A very convincing explanation, given that you forbade me to test it myself’, she crossed her arms. ‘Fine. If anything bad happens to you, I will find you and kick your ass, though.’

The woman applied the seal to his mind, put the mark on his hand for certainty and handed him the scroll containing the reverse technique. Sakura attached a chakra enhancement device to his hand. Then she wrote down the information about this attempt in her notes. Hatake kneaded the chakra and introduced it gently into the scroll. Indeed, this journey required a considerable amount of chakra, but the tool Kabuto had engineered greatly reduced the negative effects. Abruptly he found himself alone in the same room. He could sense his friends were behind the door and wondered how he would react to seeing the other real him. A curious thing and terribly confusing. He examined his hand - the marking was in its place. Satisfied with the results he untied the scroll and performed the return jutsu. Sakura breathed a sigh of relief to see him safe and sound. 

‘I still feel like kicking your ass’, she murmured and hugged him tightly.

Tobirama experienced a sting of some odd emotion. Was such a hug not something offered to those closest to oneself? He shifted uncomfortably from one foot to another. Then again, what did he even care? And did he truly consider himself someone close to Sakura? Foolishness. He figured the time spent in the future was detrimental to his mental stability. Where had the thoroughly rational Senju gone? The times had changed, after all. He had stupidly assumed that societal norms had not changed. The mere fact that kunoichi were so numerous on the battlefield and indeed had phenomenal skills made a big difference. Sakura was no exception, though she was the one who caught his attention. He had, after all, seen the Fifth Mizukage, Mei Terumi. He had watched Temari of the Sand - the older sister of the Fifth Kazekage - in battle. His grandniece was respected for her medical skills but above all her combat skills. Tenten excelled in the use of ninja tools, and Ino Yamanaka adeptly mastered her clan's techniques. He decided that the strange sting was a manifestation of culture shock. Clearly, he was subconsciously expressing criticism of the new norms. Yes, that had to be it. 

‘I believe our tests can be considered complete’, Sakura announced. ‘Thank you all for your cooperation. Your help has been essential in getting us to this stage.’

‘So, what are you going to do now?’, Naruto asked. 

‘We need some time to work out the exact strategy of action’, Kakashi replied and rubbed his temples. ‘This is not something we can engage in unprepared.’

‘And you, old man Second?’, Naruto's attention turned to Senju.

Again, some foreign feeling. The prospect of leaving this place did not please him as much as it might have seemed. However, it was inevitable - after all, he always knew this moment would come. He believed the reason for this reluctance to depart was his love for the village.

‘I suppose it is time for me to cancel the reanimation jutsu’, he said after a moment's hesitation. ‘I shall prepare a duplicate of my memory for Haruno first.’

‘Oh. I thought you would stay to assist us in working out the strategy’, Sakura spoke, disappointment audible in her voice. ‘However, I realise we have already overused your generosity.’

‘If that is your wish, I am willing to stay’, he tried to phrase his answer as neutrally as possible.

The opportunity to correct his mistakes was a fitting reason for him to prolong his stay in this new world. Tobirama resolved to fully commit to aiding the kunoichi and sharing all of his knowledge. Once again he caught himself completely overlooking Hatake's role in the whole process. Odd. After all, he was not one to allow himself such oversights. He figured he really should handle his new challenge as soon as possible, or else he was going to lose his mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Between the iron gates of fate,  
> The seeds of time were sown.  
> And watered by the deeds of those  
> Who know and who are known;  
> Knowledge is a deadly friend  
> If no one sets the rules.  
> The fate of all mankind I see  
> Is in the hands of fools  
> [...]  
> Confusion will be my epitaph  
> As I crawl a cracked and broken path
> 
> ('Epitaph' by King Crimson)


	17. why is there so much going on?

Kakashi's new desk shook under the weight of the books Sakura had dropped on it. The Hokage looked questioningly at the woman while she picked up the first book from the stack and opened to the title page. Culture of the Land of Fire throughout the ages. A heavy sigh betrayed what Hatake thought of the idea of reading a colossal book. He was not even convinced by the fact he would only have to study a section covering the time from the beginning to the middle of the previous century. Even such a section was more than one volume of Icha Icha Paradise. He doubted he could avoid learning the customs. The concept itself was sensible anyway; although they were to be under the protection of the Senju, ultimately only two people would know of their true background. Therefore, it made sense to know exactly how to dress and what to say. He wondered what strategy Sakura wanted to follow. Kakashi just could not imagine her pretending to be a docile woman with no clue about fighting. No, that would defeat the purpose of the whole endeavour.

‘Do you think pretending to be a man will do the trick?’, the resignation in the woman's tone was proof she did not believe her own words.

‘Nah’, he answered simply.

‘I was confident that the hardest part was over, and yet it turns out coming up with a convincing story is beyond me’, Sakura complained loudly and flopped into a chair. ‘And on top of that, I don't know how to bring up the subject of your eye seal to Nidaime.’

‘What is so problematic about this?’, Hatake asked, although he knew the answer; he just wanted to laugh and kill some time. 

‘Hey, I have a question for you. I believe you may be able to answer since I know of your unethical experimentation on corpses’, she spoke with feigned seriousness. ‘How does it sound?’

‘Delightful’, Kakashi tapped a finger on his chin as if he were deep in thought. ‘You may want to include something about a war crime for extra impact, though.’

They both chuckled inelegantly. The mild poking fun at the former Hokage may have been inappropriate, yet everyone could admit there was some truth to it. When they calmed down, Sakura began explaining to Kakashi the distribution of tasks she had planned. She handed him some notes with points that he was to work on, based on the literature she had provided. Thanks to her systematic approach, her friend was no longer so negatively inclined. The clear assignment eliminated the most challenging part of the whole task, for which he was grateful. Suddenly, loud footsteps were heard from behind the door.

‘Haruno-sama, we urgently need you in the hospital!’, a nurse barged into the office, disregarding the courtesies. ‘Severe poisoning, we can't identify the substance!’

‘On my way’, answered Sakura and sprang up from her chair. ‘Sorry, Kakashi. Duty calls.’

Haruno turned up at the hospital in record time. Never before had a member of the medical staff stormed into the Hokage's office, disregarding all procedures. One of the medics was waiting for her at the doorstep of the building and led her into the room hurriedly. Sakura tied up her hair on the run and disinfected her hands at the door. Her eyes widened slightly when she saw Sasuke on the hospital bed. The young man must have been strapped to the bed because the poison had caused him to convulse. The nurse removed his trousers, making her immediately notice his calf was virtually black and slowly but inevitably the higher parts of his leg were darkening as well. The skin was wrinkled and dry. The kunoichi ordered to administer an anaesthetic forcefully inserted a layer of chakra under his knee and immediately sealed the wounds with medical ninjutsu. By doing so, she prevented the poison from moving any further for a few precious minutes. At first glance, she saw nothing, but with a chakra-enhanced touch, she sensed a microscopic ball in his gastrocnemius muscle. Using a needle, she extracted it. It was no surprise to Sakura that the staff could not identify the poison - the substance under the skin was merely the product of a reaction that occurred deeper down. She prepared a sample from the contents of the orb. Although most of the poison that was inside had spread to the limb, a drop remained. It was enough for Sakura.

She was too preoccupied with the task to look at Tobirama watching her from the roof of the building adjacent to the hospital. The man watched intently as the kunoichi walked over to the room next door and then separated the liquid parts in concentration. He knew the Uchiha was her former teammate since as a former Hokage he had access to all the records. Well, someone as eager for knowledge as Tobirama would not be able to pass up the opportunity to gain an understanding of the current situation. That being said, he respected Sakura removing herself emotionally from the procedure and calmly analysing the composition of what Senju suspected was poison. After a moment, she put all the ingredients back together after writing down their respective names and summoned her assistant to her. It turned out Senju was right to assume Haruno had sent the man to the medicinal herb greenhouse because after only a moment the kunoichi had suspicious-looking plants in her hands. Swiftly, yet in concentration, she prepared the antidote, combining the plants and substances unknown to Tobirama. She performed a test on a sample of the poison and Nidaime nearly fell off the roof when he saw the woman inject herself with the poison. He saw Sakura wince in pain and almost drop the syringe, but she eventually managed to hold onto the tool. When a dark spot appeared on her forearm, Tobirama felt like running into the lab and screaming for her to come to her senses. Hell, he even wondered if perhaps she had failed and decided to commit suicide. Still, he continued to watch, as she reached for the antidote and administered it to herself. She smiled softly, acquired another dose and headed to her patient.

‘Hold him down’, she ordered. ‘The straps may not hold.’

Her subordinates instantly restrained Sasuke and were surprised to see that nothing was happening to him. Why then-

Oh.

The medic introduced medical chakra mixed with water chakra into his leg and lost her balance for a second when Sasuke unintentionally kicked her.

‘I told you to hold him!’, she yelled and repeated the procedure, this time reinforcing her footing with chakra.

Simultaneous boosting of cell proliferation and flushing out the damaged ones with water mixed with chakra was working. The anaesthetic was wearing off, though and Sasuke was grunting in pain, but Haruno had no intention of stopping - she had already come too far to start all over again. She just yelled for someone to administer another dose of the numbing agent while she continued the treatment. The poison had not penetrated the bones, but there were still all the muscles, tendons and veins to be regenerated.  _ Fat tissue and skin are the easiest to restore _ , she thought. One of the nurses wiped her sweaty forehead with a handkerchief, for which she was grateful. 

Tobirama was somewhat fascinated with how the same hands that saved lives could bring destruction. Sakura was fierce, she was a force of nature, a tree with mighty roots instead of a fragile blossom. A while back he had noticed that similar seals to the one adorning her forehead had begun to appear on her hands. Although this technique was created by Tsunade, Sakura seemed to have ideas for modifying it. A purple line of the seal stretched from the tip of her middle finger to her wrist, or at least that was what Tobirama saw - the woman wore a long-sleeved turtleneck almost constantly, now topped with a lab coat. It made him wonder if the seal reached the upper parts of her arm. Once he had considered covering his body with seals to have access to the most essential techniques at all times, but he had never been granted the opportunity to pursue that idea. He dropped those thoughts when he saw the Uchiha begin to stir.

‘Sakura?’, Sasuke muttered tiredly. ‘You saved my life.’

‘That's the job’, she answered and wrote something down on a piece of paper and handed it to Sasuke. ‘Here. You can leave the hospital, but you must follow these instructions. I've reconstructed most of your right leg, so you may have trouble using it for a while.’

‘May I have a personal question?’, he asked unexpectedly.

‘Uh, go ahead’, she replied, unable to hide her confusion. ‘No guarantee I'll answer, though.’

‘Something between you and Kakashi?’, his question was blunter than she expected.

‘Excuse me?’, Haruno frowned.

‘You chose him to go back in time with you. You don't want to talk to me’, he pointed out. ‘That proves something.’

‘It's ironic that of the two of us, you're the one who thinks everything revolves around love’, her voice was bitter. ‘Kakashi is my best friend. The only one, in fact.’

‘Would it convince you to stay here if I wanted to spend my life with you?’, it was the first time Sakura had heard Sasuke speak so rapidly. ‘I saw you in the war. I learned that you are the Chief Medic and advisor to the Hokage. Damn, when you split the earth in one move, I knew you were the one.’

‘Naruto made you say that to keep me here, huh?’, she crossed her arms.

‘I speak frankly’, stated Sasuke and looked into her eyes. ‘Sakura, it took a lot of effort for me to confess this to you. You are special. You can't leave. If you do, you will never start a family, you will never settle down. You will be an outcast in another world.’

‘I never said I wanted to start a family’, Haruno argued. ‘Sasuke, I am a medic and a warrior. I can kill and there's always the risk that I'll be the one killed. By starting a family, I’d be either abandoning my identity or creating the risk of orphaning a child.’

‘That’s…’, Sasuke struggled to find a word. ‘Reasonable. Thank you for sharing your perspective with me.’

‘I see Naruto is not the only one of my boys who has matured’, she joked and ruffled his hair in a playful gesture, making Sasuke think she spent far too much time with Kakashi. 

Well, Tobirama was not proud of his eavesdropping. He purposely hid a little closer to the hospital so he could get a good earful of the conversation. Another similarity between him and Sakura: they both refused to settle down for similar reasons. The only idea he could understand was of arranged marriages for political purposes. Though he never went for one himself, as he saw no tangible benefit in marrying the individuals whose clans sent the proposals. He was also always puzzled by his brother's apparent enjoyment of his relationship with Mito Uzumaki, though the politics led to it as well. Hashirama was an exception in the shinobi world, however, for he lived to a ripe old age. He gave way to Tobirama, took care of the grandchildren, and died later than his younger sibling. When Sakura left the hospital room, Senju had nothing left to listen to and felt ashamed. What had gotten into him? Why was he following this woman and expressing such interest in each of her actions? Could it be that subconsciously he continued to distrust her? Maybe loneliness has finally gotten to him? After all, while the woman was working at the hospital or performing her duties as an advisor, he had no one to talk to. Tsunade was not fond of him, to put it mildly. She was even more hostile towards him than Sakura had been when they first met. He had not built enough of a relationship with anyone else to just talk. 

‘Hey, Tobirama!’, her voice startled him slightly. ‘Did you need something?’

‘I simply wanted to ensure there was no distress on your part’, he answered. ‘Should any serious harm come to you, your plan would fail.’

‘Well, then you can keep an eye on me over tea because I was just about to take a break’, Sakura smiled. ‘Interested?’

‘If that is your wish’, his response was plain; fortunately, kunoichi did not mind in the slightest. 

In truth, Sakura had grown accustomed to the constant presence of his grumpy self. It occurred to her that while his decisions as a leader were at times controversial, he was a good individual with an intriguing personality. Once he said that to her he was just a stone likeness of the Hokage towering over the village, she realized he was right. Senju was a little lost in the modern world and Sakura resolved to aid him in adjusting to the new reality, even though he was only temporarily part of it. Tea seemed to be a pretty decent start. 

* * *

The Second Hokage was intrigued by the vessel that retained the high temperature of the drink inside. He had been mildly worried at the prospect of drinking cold tea when Sakura took him to the mountain towering above the village, but when he was handed a mug of hot drink, the worry gave way to curiosity. The gist of how the device called a thermos worked seemed to lie within the double wall. He had also found the mugs themselves to be an excellent design some time ago - a convenient handle was much better than a cup with no grip. 

'While I prefer sights of nature over buildings, I do love Konoha, so it's not so bad', Sakura said to initiate the conversation.

'Nature is unpredictable', remarked Tobirama and continued after a moment's reflection. 'The same could be said of you. Even now I remain uncertain as to whether you are not doing all this to kill me in the past.'

'Sounds like high self-esteem to me', she smirked. 'You do have a point, though. Nonetheless, I would rather leave talks about this matter for later.'

'May I ask about your seals, then?', his inquiry was unexpected to Sakura, but she nodded. 'Have they got any particular purpose?'

'I am experimenting with storing elemental chakra', she explained. 'It's a bit more demanding, but the potential results may be worth it. I try to expand them symmetrically, but the seal on my left hand fills up much faster. I suspect this may have something to do with the proximity of the Gate of Death. I think about creating new seals for Yin chakra on the left side of the body only. I already have three others located along my spine. The one at the level of the thoracic segment is filling up faster, which works in favour of my hypothesis.'

'I used to think about placing seals on my body to have access to techniques, but I never considered accumulating chakra in them', admitted Senju and sipped his tea.

'That's because you and your brother are basically powerhouses', kunoichi's honest laugh for some reason soothed Tobirama. 'I have managed to expand my basic chakra resources, but I still have to rely on seals. You guys don't have to worry about something like that.'

'Well, abundant chakra resources are hereditary in us', said Nidaime. 'I had never heard of the Haruno clan. Perhaps you would like to tell me about your family?'

'There is no Haruno clan, only a civilian family whose bloodline will end with me', a sad expression appeared on her face and she refilled their mugs with tea to be able to turn around and hide. 'When I decided I wanted to become a kunoichi, my parents figured I'd quit before even becoming a genin. Once I got on Kakashi's team, I was given an ultimatum - lose the roof over my head or give up on my dreams. Well, I chose the former. After that, we haven't spoken again. They were killed during the Pain invasion.'

'My father used to be extremely strict', Tobirama's confession was not expected, but certainly welcomed. 'He nearly killed Hashirama for daring to object to making children fight. I vowed to myself to never become like him. But, well, I suppose I have become even worse. Perhaps I copied some of my behaviour patterns from him.'

'You're a good person, Tobirama', Sakura protested and to the man's terror she grabbed his forearm. 'You cannot think otherwise.'

This time he broke the physical contact quicker than he did recently. He still had no intention of slighting the woman, but this unfamiliar sensation frightened him. There was something unsafe about it, like it was some sort of trap.

'Oh', Sakura withdrew her hand even more. 'Uh. Sorry. I didn't know it made you uncomfortable.'

'There is no reason to...', he started to assure her, but his common sense and logic kicked in. '...continue with such gestures. None of them are necessary.'

'I see', her voice seemed to have quieted down in shame. 'I hope I haven't crossed any boundaries by inviting you to tea, then. If I have, please do tell me.'

'The encounter itself and the conversation we had were enjoyable', his reply seemed to calm Sakura down, although she still was clearly embarassed. 

Well, he did not lie. Technically speaking, at least.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm just a lost soul, struggling in your world  
> I seek the answers I'm not sure that I'm allowed to know
> 
> ('Lost Soul' by Harley Poe)


	18. it's not mood swings if you mess up

After her tea break, Sakura headed back to Hokage's office. The case of the life-threatening assault on Sasuke had been passed to the ANBU investigation unit for further analysis. Of the components identified by Sakura, only one ingredient of the poison was not common but native to the Land of Fire. Well, if the kunoichi was to be honest, she was not at all surprised by this attack. She had expected it would soon be settled that the perpetrator's motive was to try and punish the traitor. Just because Sasuke was under the protection of the Hokage had not made the villagers trust him. Ninjas and civilians alike looked resentfully at the Uchiha and whispered behind his back. Haruno did not predict success for Naruto's plan to hand over the Hokage position to his friend. It seemed much more sensible to carry out Itachi's idea. In the interrogation report, Sakura had read that the elder Uchiha's words had prompted Sasuke to form a crazy plan. A true shinobi is one who protects the village from the shadows. The wrong interpretation of those words had caused the younger brother to plunge into darkness, and it was almost too late to save him.

Despite Sasuke's assurances, Sakura was certain that it was Naruto who had persuaded him to make the false confession. Uzumaki refused to lose his former teammate, let alone his sensei. His friend had already left the village and it had taken a lot of effort to get him back. While he did not have such a close relationship with Sakura, he was unwilling to see Team Seven fall apart again. There were still Yamato and Sai, whom Naruto had grown fond of overtime, but it just was not the same. Without Kakashi and Sakura, Dai-nana-han might as well not have existed. They were an integral part of the group. Although Naruto regretted his outburst in the Hokage's office, his opinion had not changed. He still thought their decision was harmful. Haruno thought he would have been able to come up with something as ridiculous as forcing Sasuke to pretend to be in love. She never understood why everything in Konoha seemed to revolve around love. Tsunade herself had told her that this feeling had devastated her ninja career. She was incapable of separating herself emotionally from the sight of her beloved and younger brother on the brink of death. Later she was paralysed by fear every time she saw blood. Senju thought this stage in her life was pathetic. How could a powerful medic chicken out and give up treatment because the war had taken those close to her? She was not the only one who had lost loved ones and had no right to place her suffering above the needs of her patients. At least, that was what Tsunade had told Sakura over the cup of sake.

Friendship? By all means, Sakura considered it the highest value in the ninja world. Love? An unnecessary burden. A shinobi could return to the village on any given day as a lifeless body. Seeking a partner among civilians reduced that risk, yet the suffering would be even greater in such a setting. At least the ninja were already at peace with death. The ordinary people? Not so much. People are supposed to be prepared for loss, but they never actually are. The kunoichi was not sure when she became so bitter, but so far she had not suffered any consequences of such an attitude. She had no desire to be a mother or wife. Sakura Haruno was a medic, a warrior, a murderer. Stroking a lover's hair with the same hands that were previously stained with the blood of dozens of people? Unthinkable.

She did not want to dwell on emotional issues any longer, so she focused on analysing complaints from residents. Sakura counted a total of eight concerning Sasuke Uchiha. While she, Kakashi and Shikamaru had doubts about the validity of the decision to drop his case, politics demanded controversial choices. Punishing Sasuke could potentially cause Naruto to turn against the village, and losing the jinchūriki was too significant a risk for the just-rebuilding village. The possibility that two of Konoha's most powerful ninja would go rogue was a frightening scenario. That lenient treatment was neither a reasonable nor fair solution. They had taken away the sense of security from the citizens and lower-ranking ninja to keep their two most crucial assets. But to maintain their reputation as the most powerful village among those of the Five Great Nations, they had to maintain military strength. Konoha's Council had surprisingly agreed with this choice, which only reinforced the trio's belief that the decision was morally questionable. Indeed, the longer Sakura held the role of advisor to the Hokage, the more she understood Tobirama. It never changed the fact she still considered the journey into the past to be the responsible path.

‘Sasuke has no respect from the village, I have to admit that’, she finally said after signing the last of the complaints. 

‘Why this crazy claim?’, muttered Kakashi sarcastically, focused on the ANBU report concerning the Raikage's suspicious activities at sea by the Land of Water.

‘I know we've made the right choice, yet I feel guilty’, Sakura continued.

‘Take comfort in the fact that we will soon change all of this’, Hatake's words did not calm the kunoichi down one bit; they were still here, after all. ‘I'm not saying we should completely cast aside our responsibilities, but I think we can loosen up a bit. We have a past to worry about.’

‘Fair point’, she remarked and dropped the topic.

Meanwhile, Tobirama sat in Sakura's living room diligently organizing the notes he had made. It was imperative that he got away from all of these bizarre feelings, and to do so, he needed to bring the planning phase to an end. The Second Hokage arranged the descriptions of the various strategies into neat piles. There were separate stacks for behaviour patterns, language, common cultural knowledge and summaries of historical events. He had also prepared maps with Senju camps marked and places where the young Tobirama could most easily be found. He had developed several strategies for cleverly transferring to him the contents of a kunai with the sealed memory. He even described the materials used to sew clothes and marked the pages in the book with drawings of typical attires of his time. There were calculations of how long the technique should last for Kakashi and Sakura to terminate it at the right moment. He drafted a whole story for the two of them. All so that he could leave as soon as possible. Admittedly, the old version of him was about to meet Haruno, but then the kunoichi would already be acting like a usual woman. Well, almost usual. Tobirama refused to strip her of her identity, so he left her role as combat medic unchanged. Hatake and Haruno were to introduce themselves as war orphans, which was not even far from the truth. This was to explain the woman's battle skills and the fact that she was travelling in the company of a non-family male. He had taken care of all the details, but the issue of the Sharingan remained, so he decided to go to the Hokage Tower while both of them were there.

‘I have already made the necessary preparations. You will find the instructions in your house, Haruno’, he announced without greeting. ‘Rokudaime, you cannot show up in the past with Sharingan. That will raise too many suspicions. Even if you cover your eye, any moderately skilled sensor will detect excessive chakra consumption in your orbital area.’

Kakashi was well aware of this. He was slightly pained by the prospect of getting rid of the last thing that connected him to Obito, yet he had no intention of backing out of the project. He could do perfectly well in combat without the Sharingan, if not better. The constantly active eye was drawing so much chakra that Kakashi was unable to use too many techniques in a row. By getting rid of it, he could increase his potential. Besides, he would get some relief from traumatic memories. The constant pulsing and pain in his skull would not allow Obito and Rin to leave his thoughts for even a day. There was his chance for freedom. Reading his opponents' movements came easily to him even with his normal eye - the result of years of battle experience. Kamui was a useful but physically exhausting and mentally taxing skill. The only real drawback would be the inability to use Chidori, but he could probably handle that as well. 

‘So let's remove that eye’, he shrugged. ‘I cover it most of the time anyway, so it shouldn't be a problem.’

‘Way to make it dramatic’, Sakura rolled her eyes. ‘I reckon it's possible to suppress the Sharingan without damaging the eye, but that damn seal stands in the way.’

‘A seal?’, echoed Senju and frowned. ‘You failed to mention this to me before, though you had plenty of opportunities to do so.’

‘Ah, yes. Let me ask you if you know anything about the seals you've probably seen on dead Uchiha eyes’, she snorted amusedly and suddenly her laughter died down. ‘I apologize. Your attitude towards the Uchiha is a sensitive subject for me and I was afraid I would do something tactless. Which I just did.’

‘I have gotten used to it’, Tobirama replied and despite his need to escape flashed her a slight half-smile. ‘I am not as callous as those historical studies describe me.’

And the same thing happened again. Tobirama, renowned for his composure, was losing his common sense whenever he heard this bold kunoichi. Every aspect of her existence surprised Tobirama. How old could she be? Eighteen? In his day, a woman of that age would usually already be married and with a child or two. She would have been a gentle and submissive wife radiating a homely, soothing warmth. Warriors returning from the battlefield would receive worried looks, a nutritious meal and a hot bath. Senju hated this vision and stubbornly refused to marry. He was unable to stop himself from thinking what it would be like to return from war with a lover by his side instead of waiting at home. As soon as he realized what he was thinking about, he immediately redirected his thoughts to another track. It was essential for Tobirama to leave because the pink-haired witch had cast some kind of spell on him. He could not fool himself any longer - it was not a matter of cultural differences. Otherwise, he would have been fascinated by Konoha's other residents as well. There were, after all, many capable kunoichi, yet only this particular one occupied his thoughts. For a moment, he had the insane thought of destroying all their developments and freeing himself from the entire predicament but refrained from doing so. Because he knew that Sakura would recreate the whole process and go back in time if only to turn him into a bloody pulp.

Well, Sakura was right. Tobirama was well aware of that seal on Kakashi's eye, as he had seen it hundreds of times before. When someone tried to learn the secrets of the Sharingan, the sealed eyeball exploded. The secret to getting rid of this protection was in the unintuitive method. After more than a dozen attempts, Senju learned that breaking this seal required not inserting chakra, but drawing it out. Even when he managed to learn this technique, the slightest twitch of his hand activated the self-destruct mechanism. Therefore, he considered Haruno the only person who could undertake something like this without much risk. He explained the procedure to the two ninja. Kakashi trusted his friend and her skills, so while Senju had not yet finished speaking, Hatake had already uncovered an eye and was making room on his desk.

Sakura, on the other hand, felt ashamed that she had not come up with that answer herself. However, joy outweighed that one of the last missing pieces of the plan would be completed in a moment. She began to form chakra. First, she took Kakashi's hand and tested her method on it. Hatake reported that he indeed felt a minimal drop in his chakra levels. Then Haruno nodded and placed her hand on his cheek so that her thumb was below the corner of his eye. With a short pulse of chakra, she temporarily immobilized his eye to avoid unconscious movement. Only then did she proceed with the actual procedure. Her superior chakra control was proving helpful. Once she removed the seal, she stimulated the duct supplying chakra to his eye.

‘It worked’, she said softly as Kakashi's iris took on a natural inky black colour. ‘You look way better without that eye.’

‘Do I?’, he smirked and rose from his desk, looking around. ‘Where did Nidaime-sama go?’

‘No idea’, Sakura shrugged. 

For some reason, watching Haruno's hand lay on the cheek of someone slightly resembling him reinforced Tobirama's desire to escape. He was not yet allowed to finish the technique, but he could run away to think about the situation. That's why he slipped away to her house (an interesting choice) while she was occupied. He pushed himself to do so when he caught his mind on a foolish thought: why was that hand not lying on  _ his _ cheek? Ah, right - he had pushed Sakura away himself, after all. Appropriately, it should be added. Senju decided it was time to plan to prepare his sealed memories and modifying them to erase any trace of these bizarre sensations. He wondered if it was possible to create a technique to erase specific memories from a living person. Leaving aside the Sharingan, of course. Tobirama had to admit that loneliness had taken its toll on him over the years. Now a simple friendly touch triggered completely foreign and new thoughts in him. Nothing was loving or tender about her touch, and yet Senju longed for it. He suspected that anyone's touch would have been sufficient. Just because he was a child of war and had not experienced tenderness did not mean that it had disappeared from his needs. He involuntarily breathed a sigh of relief when he came up with this justification. Yes, that had to be it - he was missing love in his life. His mother had passed away at the birth of his youngest sibling. Father was always strict and treated his children like soldiers. Tobirama's brothers loved him, but he rejected their brotherly affection himself to minimise the pain in case of their death. Later, everyone feared him or respected him too much to even pat him on the shoulder. He decided this was going to be the first thing he would change in the past.

He stroked his own cheek experimentally. An odd feeling.

* * *

‘There you are!’, a few hours later, he heard Sakura yell and smiled from over the mug of tea he took the liberty to prepare. ‘Your chakra is very distinctive, but it's a useless fact when you suppress it. I've looked everywhere for you, and you're sitting on my floor! Wait, is that my favourite tea? The tea I bought with my hard-earned money? Tobirama!’

‘Yes’, he replied, amused by Sakura's rage over such a trivial cause. ‘What did you mean by calling my chakra distinctive? I remove all identifying elements from it, so I fail to understand your statement.’

‘Huh. I thought everyone could recognise something like that’, she frowned. ‘Each chakra system looks similar, but its content is unique. When I sense your chakra, it feels like sitting at the bottom of a lake. It is overwhelming and chilling, but one has no desire to emerge from it.’

‘I have never heard of such a thing’, he remarked. ‘Are you sure you have no sensory ability?’

‘No, it's a matter of good chakra control. I can use it to scan a small area and analyse the chakra of people who are within its range’, she explained. ‘It's useless for tracking because I have to be very close to identify the person. Still, observing someone else's chakra is fun.’

‘Could you teach me that?’, Tobirama’s question shocked Sakura. ‘I do know the chakra signatures of those with whom I have spent a considerable amount of time, but your description is curious.’

‘This is not the same as reading a chakra signature. It is rather an understanding of its nature’, she clarified. ‘I don't know if you can do it at a distance without perfect chakra control, so put your hand on my forehead. Two of the eight inner gates are there.’

Tobirama hesitated for a moment, but curiosity outweighed his aversion to physical touch. He did as he was told.

‘Now close your eyes and when I stop talking, don't focus on anything but my chakra. You must introduce your chakra into my system and then blend it with mine’, she said. ‘Well, at least that works for me.’

He gently introduced his chakra into her head and immediately found the right spot through his sensory abilities. What he felt was beyond his expectations. Connecting his chakra with Sakura's made him grasp an inner peace. He thought he had never felt so at ease. If his chakra was like a lake, Sakura's was like a vast plain. Tobirama could have sworn he felt a warm wind sweeping across his face. He could hear the murmur of the storm in the distance. Her power was dominant in a protective way. Tobirama refused to move away and lose the opportunity to absorb this fantastically addictive chakra. He was disappointed that Sakura had ended the link on her own, but at least he came back to his senses. What the hell was that? The secrets of chakra theory were still undiscovered, it seemed. Perhaps he could test his newly acquired skill on someone else. Only then did he realise that it probably was impossible, since it was Sakura's chakra that maintained the connection all along. Another idea came to his mind. 

‘Are you by any chance a genjutsu type?’, Tobirama suddenly asked.

‘Well, yes, but this fighting style doesn't suit me’, she admitted reluctantly. ‘I prefer direct combat. Why this question?’

‘Could you demonstrate your skills to me?’, he suggested. ‘I assume that breaking out of your illusion would be a demanding task. Your chakra control is unparalleled.’

‘I would rather not’, Sakura had no intention of forcing herself to do something she had no desire to do. ‘I respect all genjutsu users, but for me, this is a dishonourable stunt and a last resort.’

‘It is a form of combat like any other’, Senju argued, feeling that the woman is not telling him everything.

‘It's a form of combat that destroyed all the progress of my friend's psychiatric treatment because he was subject to torture’, Haruno could no longer stop herself. ‘Maybe it was an illusion, but the psychological damage was real.’

‘And that is why you refuse to show me what you can do?’, his question was not tactful, which he realised too late. ‘Just because your friend was too weak to break the illusion?’

The woman's jaw began to shake and for a moment Tobirama thought she was going to start crying, but the exact opposite happened. Her chakra-charged fist went straight for Senju's chest, and if he had been alive at the moment of impact, he would probably have been dead afterwards. Sakura's hand was stuck between his ribs, but she hardly cared. His body felt no pain anyway, now he could experience at most an unusual chill inside his body.

‘I would love to see how you handle illusion of this level’, she snapped. ‘Tsukuyomi is not some ordinary genjutsu that anyone can learn. It is an ability that only Itachi Uchiha's Mangekyō Sharingan had. Even the fact that Kakashi had Sharingan did not help him resist this illusion. It's a power that even someone as strong as you can't imagine.’

He expected Haruno to come to her senses in a moment, heal his injuries and apologise, as was her custom. She yanked her hand from his body and went to wash it as if nothing had happened. Tobirama wondered fleetingly if he should pick up his crushed ribs from the floor. He was also curious about the details of that genjutsu she mentioned. For a moment he waited patiently for her apology, but it did not come.

‘Are you not intending to apologise to me for being disrespectful?’, If the last question was tactless, then this one was a damn mistake.

Sakura turned quickly and, with fury in her eyes, aimed another blow at Tobirama's chest. He managed to dodge it and her fist hit the wall, making a giant hole in it. She tried to catch him, but the Hiraishin gave him the advantage. At least until Sakura predicted his movements and grabbed him by the collar, then dragged him out of the building and threw him against the ground, creating a crater. Senju immediately picked himself up and jumped away; ranged combat was the only thing that could give him the win. He performed a shortened sequence of seals. Suiryūdan no Jutsu was a powerful, hard to neutralize technique that crushed the opponent with pressure. Sakura made the only reasonable choice and jumped away. As one might easily guess, the sounds of the battle attracted attention. Tsunade, Kakashi, Naruto, Sasuke and a dozen ANBU members arrived on the scene. The masked man tried to immobilize Sakura, but the Godaime dismissed him with a raise of her hand. 

‘What is this all about?’, Godaime's threatening voice was directed at Tobirama, not her student.

‘'Forgive me,  _ shishō _ ,' Sakura said and bowed. 'I should be able to control myself no matter the situation.’

‘I don't care if you're the Second Hokage and my family. If you hurt my apprentice, I will smear your stone likeness with your remains!’, the threat in her words was real. ‘It's enough that your damn decisions have had such an impact on the past that Sakura and Kakashi are going to sacrifice their lives for the village. Now you even want to kill her?’

‘Tsunade- _ shishō, _ it was my fault’, Haruno explained, but Tsunade had no intention of listening to that.

‘If you had not provoked her, she would not have done such a thing’, said the woman. ‘What did you say to her?’

‘This is no concern of yours, Tsunade’, Tobirama crossed his arms, despite the hole in the middle of his chest. ‘Since you request an explanation, here it is. I-’

‘Not a word, Nidaime!’, Sakura yelled and grabbed him by the collar again.

The switch back to the official title hurt him, but well - he deserved it. 

‘Tsunade-shishō, I will tell you everything, but in private. Please, not here’, Haruno begged, desperation evident in her voice.

‘So be it’, replied the older woman and sighed. ‘I do not yet know what caused such a fuss, but-’

‘Are you all right, Sakura?’, Sasuke's voice was neutral, but the very fact that he asked this question indicated his worry.

‘Safe and sound’, she replied and realised that Tobirama still had his insides visible. ‘Nidaime, let me heal you.’

Without waiting for an answer, she used medical chakra to return his body to its original state. Her power no longer had that calming effect on Tobirama. It was either that or the coldness in her emerald eyes nullified it. Senju did not know where this talent for destroying all his progress in emotional areas came from. Well, in theory, he should be pleased: after all, he wanted to get rid of those alien feelings. However, he feared that he had simply added to his problems.

‘We are sincerely grateful to you for your support and cooperation’, Sakura's professionalism only deepened his sense of guilt. ‘’You can proceed to seal your memory, Nidaime. Afterwards, you will cancel your Edo Tensei contract.’

The man closed his eyes, trying not to laugh in the face of the absurd situation. She had healed his body only to tell him to die.

'Forgive me', he said quietly enough for only her ears to catch the words. 'Appropriate behaviour is not my forte.'

'Well, neither is mine', he felt relieved to see the gentlest of smiles on her face. 'Remember, the next time we see each other, you will be mortal.'

Well, that no longer brought him relief. At all.

Disregarding the attention of the company, he pulled her closer in a farewell embrace. Sakura reciprocated the hug and laughed quietly, surprised by his sudden change in behaviour.

He handed her the prepared kunai after performing the procedure in front of the confused observers. Just a moment ago they were trying to kill each other, and now they were hugging each other goodbye? Absolutely no one understood what was going on. Tsunade looked like her jaw was about to drop and make another crater in the ground. Sasuke resembled a kettle of water close to boiling over. Naruto was as oblivious as ever and failed to understand why everyone was surprised. Kakashi scratched his head in bewilderment.

'Farewell', Tobirama said in his usual cool tone to those gathered.

Hearing their answers, he began to perform the necessary seals.

'Until next time, Sakura', before he finished the technique, he looked at Sakura with something unreadable in his crimson eyes.

'See you, Tobirama', her smile made executing the last seal a little more bearable and yet more painful. 'Sorry about the damage. Oh, you left your armour and happuri!'

'You may keep them', he snorted and shook his head. 'Feel free to give them to me next time.'

A blinding light enveloped his body and he felt his consciousness disintegrate. A strange feeling. Similar to the one he experienced every time he saw that woman with the pink hair.


	19. to regain honour and trust

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't wanna see you go  
> The sky is over
> 
> ('Sky is Over' by Serj Tankian)

Someone might consider their relatively quick move to the final phase of the plan irresponsible, but in reality, waiting would do no good. Kakashi and Sakura were in their peak physical form at that moment. Three months after Tobirama left, Hatake had managed to develop a new technique that he did not need Sharingan to use. He called it Shiden. Its principle was very similar to Chidori, so it did not require any major changes to Kakashi's fighting style. Sakura, in turn, returned to regular training with Tsunade and expanded her offensive techniques based on medical ninjutsu. With her extensive knowledge of human anatomy, she knew exactly which muscle to cut or which bone to break to end a fight in one move. Now she added to that the ability to cut off the blood supply to key organs with one well-aimed blow, and a few other interesting tricks. She managed to increase her stamina, but her speed, unfortunately, remained at an average level. She and Kakashi studied the notes Tobirama had prepared for them. They were both impressed with his attention to detail. However, they still had their responsibilities and a week before they were scheduled to perform the technique, the sad news reached them.

However, they still had their current problems and a week before they were scheduled to perform the technique, they were roused from their sleep by members of the ANBU. Rokudaime and his two advisors, as well as the Konoha Council and Godaime, were summoned to the area around the Uchiha Estate. Someone had set fire to all the buildings, most of which could not be salvaged due to the old wooden construction. Inscriptions were painted everywhere: 'traitor', 'cursed Uchiha', 'murderer', 'psycho', 'leave the village'. Every Uchiha symbol in sight was covered in red paint. The doors of the clan's temple were smashed and the bodies of dead animals were thrown inside. The Uchiha graves had been vandalised, with traces of saliva still visible on some. To make matters worse, even Neji's Byakugan could not track Sasuke. No sensor could sense him anywhere near Konoha. Simultaneously with the ANBU tracking division, Kakashi dispatched his ninken. Several minutes later, the horrifying news arrived.

Sasuke Uchiha's corpse had been found in the Valley of the End.

All circumstantial evidence pointed to suicide. A letter bearing the clan's seal only confirmed this supposition. Its contents were long, and the paper showed the places where tears had fallen before. Sakura added some of her own when she could no longer contain her emotions. In his farewell message, Sasuke addressed each member of Team Seven individually. Haruno's hands were shaking as she read the young Uchiha's sorrowful words.

_ Despite all the evil the villagers have done to me, I am no longer able to harm them. In doing so, I would lose the remnants of my dignity, my only friend, and my right to call Konoha home. Therefore, I die as a traitor who asks for forgiveness. _

_ I left the village to seek strength for my vengeance. Few know the truth about my brother. The Uchiha clan planned to take over the village by force. Itachi Uchiha took upon himself the burden of stopping that tragedy by causing another. He slaughtered nearly every Uchiha to protect the village and me, his younger sibling. I only learned of this when I murdered him. Afterwards, I learned about Danzō Shimura's part in the above situation. There was an opportunity for Shisui Uchiha to mitigate the conflict peacefully, but Danzō considered Uchiha too great a threat. He wanted to get rid of us and achieved his goal. During The Fourth Shinobi War, Itachi was revived and told me his story. His wish was to die by my hand, as a form of self-punishment. To grant me more power, he gave me his eyes.  _

_ My hatred grew, but this time I directed it at the village. After all, it was the Third Hokage and Danzō Shimura, as well as the Konoha Council, who decided that my clan deserved to be exterminated. Hundreds of lives needlessly wasted. Nevertheless, my friend, Naruto Uzumaki, was able to talk some sense into me. A village is not only its leaders but most importantly its people. The same people who destroyed the last thing I had of joyful memories. My home was demolished, the graves of my relatives desecrated, the clan temple stained with blood. I understood the resentment and mistrust, but this incident tonight opened my eyes. The only thing I can do to regain Konoha's respect and trust is to commit suicide. I hope they will understand that I had no intention of harming them. If this letter is to be published, please leave the rest of it to the intended recipients. _

_ Kakashi-sensei, Rokudaime-sama. I remember the moment you told me that everyone you loved had long since been killed. I foolishly assumed it was my suffering that mattered the most and that no one could understand it. Had I not been so stubborn, your words at that moment would have made me return to the village. Because of my defection from the village, you taught me for a short time, but you gave me a solid foundation for my development. The Chidori you passed on to me has become part of my identity. I hope that your and Sakura's plans will succeed.  _

_ Naruto Uzumaki, you are an amazing man. You were willing to give up your dream to give me more respect from the village. I know you will make a splendid Hokage. You have my gratitude for ignoring my foolish words about breaking ties. For not leaving me for a single moment. You always believed I had an element of kindness in my heart, and apparently, you were right. Thank you for everything you have done for me. Forgive me for repeatedly rejecting your help and friendship. Without you, I would have plunged into darkness forever. You gave me hope that I could become a normal, respectable shinobi. You gave me hope that I still have at least one friend in this world whom I have not failed completely. Friendship, which I had discarded, turned out to be the most essential value in my life. There is something about you that makes you able to bring even a damaged person like me back on the right track. You have become a hero, Naruto. Just as you always wanted. I am proud of how victorious you emerged from your unequal battle with fate. I do trust that you will achieve the happiness you need. I have no idea what else to say to you, as I have too little time and too much to share. My apologies for leaving without a personal farewell. I hope you will not suffer too much because of my death. You need to be strong for Konoha. _

_ Sakura Haruno. A talented kunoichi. A medic who is said to have surpassed the Fifth Hokage. Named the Iron Fist of Konoha in the Bingo Book. Powerful, wise and gorgeous. You are last in order in this list, as this is the hardest part for me. I realized too late that I cannot imagine life without you by my side. It sounds silly from an eighteen-year-old ninja, but this is the truth. My confession was too late, though maybe it was for the better? If you loved me and decided to marry me, your image would probably suffer. After all, my reputation is not exactly impeccable. I have tried to kill you several times, just as I tried to kill Naruto, but I feel particularly bad towards you. Not because I think you are weak. Quite the contrary, I admire your strength. I feel guilty because I love you, and you do not do such things to loved ones. When I saw how gracefully you moved on the battlefield and defeated your opponents with single blows, I was shocked. I saw you in the medical tent, operating on patients with precision despite the war raging outside. I learned that you are Kakashi's advisor and Chief Medic. You saved my miserable life. Three months ago I saw the results of your brief battle with Nidaime. How could I not fall in love with someone like that? Out of our team, you are the one who has achieved the most. Without any kekkei genkai, the support of a famous clan, or being a jinchūriki, you can fight on par with the Kages. I wish you to achieve what you desire. You deserve happiness, Sakura Haruno. I suspect I have spoken more words to you with this letter than I have ever spoken in your direction. I will die in peace, knowing that you will know of my feelings. Thank you for letting me experience love, however one-sided. _

_ Now, as I finish this letter, I declare that I am destroying my eyes. The cursed kekkei genkai in its natural form must disappear. It has done too much evil in this world for me to let someone take it away.  _

_ Goodbye, friends. I loved you. _

Sasuke was not dead. Sasuke could not be dead. Sakura's face took on a blank expression after she finished reading the message. She gently set it down on the desk where the ANBU member had placed the recovered letter earlier. Kakashi embraced her, and she unusually did not reciprocate it. She was supposed to be powerful, unstoppable, laughing in the face of death and defying the laws of nature. So why was her heart squeezed by grief now? Why did she allow herself to show such weakness? The tears streaming down her cheeks soaked the Hokage's clothes, but neither of them had the strength to speak of it. Naruto had already been informed of his friend's death by someone from the ANBU, as he burst into the office. He stood on the threshold and opened his mouth as if to say something, then shook his head and joined in the embrace. This was not the reunion of Team Seven that they had dreamed of. Uzumaki's quiet crying only added to the grief of the other two. Eventually, Naruto calmed down enough to read the letter left by Sasuke. A new determination appeared in his eyes. He had to be strong not for Konoha, but for the friend who had died because of it.

Many villagers did not turn up for the funeral ceremony, but those civilians and ninja who did come behaved respectfully. Tsunade and the surviving members of Team Seven spoke about Sasuke. Ino Yamanaka placed the most beautiful bouquet on his grave. Sakura tried not to think about the empty eye sockets she saw during the autopsy. She focused on preventing Kakashi from having a panic attack similar to the one at Asuma's funeral, but luckily Rokudaime held steady. A guard was ordered at the Uchiha's grave so that no one would dare to destroy it. It soon became apparent, however, that Sasuke was right - his death had restored the trust he so desired. People were gathering to rebuild and clear the destroyed clan headquarters to make amends for the Uchiha legacy. 

Naruto was already ready to take over as Hokage with the help of Tsunade. The time had come for farewells, which only served as a form of tying up loose ends for Hatake and Haruno. Ultimately, the moment they were to leave the present, the memories of them were to be replaced. As if they had never existed. Together they visited Naruto. Kakashi attended the memorial where many of the names belonged to his dead friends and family. He cleaned his father's grave one last time and placed fresh flowers on it. He said goodbye to the ninken - it was highly unlikely that the summoning would work after the journey. However, he packed the contract scroll just in case. He picked up the sewn clothing. Afterwards, he went to get the armour and weapons prepared by the blacksmith. He also learned that Sakura had already picked up her orders. Haruno drank some sake with Tsunade, she bid farewell to Kurenai and her team, she also visited Gai's Team. To her surprise, Neji offered her bandages, which his clan still produced from the same materials despite the passing years. She accepted his gift with gratitude. No one wanted to talk directly about the journey into the past, as everyone knew it would erase traces of their existence from the present. It was one thing to test going back a few minutes and erasing oneself only for such a short time, and another to go back a number of years higher than the age of the oldest shinobi.

Finally, they could tell they were ready. Along with Naruto, Tsunade, Kabuto, and the ANBU escort, they went to the place designated by Tobirama. The scroll was unfolded and the protective barrier erected. They changed into period-appropriate attire. The chakra enhancement device was set to self-destruct after the technique was completed for safety. Notes on all the details of the technique and strategy were memorized by Sakura and Kakashi and then destroyed. Final goodbyes were exchanged. Sakura activated the device designed by Kabuto, applied a protective layer to her and Kakashi's body and their belongings, then infused chakra into the scroll.

In concentration, they counted the seconds aloud to complete the technique in time. Images of changing vegetation, seasons and buildings flashed before their eyes like crazy. The same spot had changed drastically over the years.

Five...

Four...

Three...

Two...

One...

'Now!", they yelled at the same moment.

The first difference they noticed was the much cleaner air. The vegetation was lusher and some of the species were no longer found in the Land of Fire in the future. As planned, Kakashi immediately moved away to get out of range of the Senju technique and further muted his chakra. Sakura, meanwhile, conducted a quick scan of her surroundings. Seeing that no one was around, she slammed her head into the trunk with all her might. It undoubtedly looked idiotic, but she needed some real drama. As expected, no one else but Tobirama himself appeared before her a few minutes later. She had suppressed her chakra as much as possible and thanks to her perfect control over it, to Senju she looked like an ordinary lost woman.

‘Who are you?" he asked suspiciously and squinted. 'Who did this to you?

Sakura deliberately did not answer and only pointed to her head. Senju walked over to her and looked at the wound. At that moment, Haruno expressly pulled out a kunai and stuck it into his leg.

''You...,'' he growled and was already about to lift her by the collar when his memories returned. 'Sakura?’

‘The very same’, she replied; then she activated her medical ninjutsu to heal her head and his calf. ’Forgive the poor acting. Although the damsel in distress probably lulled your vigilance after all.’

‘I would never have believed it was not genjutsu were it not for all the details’, Tobirama remarked and sat down next to her. ‘That knowledge is somewhat overwhelming.’

Kakashi appeared right in front of them, his mask no longer present. He refused to get rid of it in Konoha from the future, though his fears made no sense.

‘Rokudaime’, Senju acknowledged. ‘I suppose I should not call you that any longer.’

‘So the memory retrieval was a success’, Hatake said and looked around. ‘Is your esteemed brother around?’

‘I can sense powerful chakra approaching and the volume matches this of Hashirama, so we can assume he will be here in a flash’, replied Tobirama after touching the ground and Sakura handed him the kunai.

Indeed, after only a few seconds a familiar face appeared between them. When the elder Senju saw the strangers standing calmly near Tobirama and the lack of hostility on his younger sibling's face, he immediately felt his interest increase.

‘You determined these people are not dangerous. I trust your expertise, so could you introduce me to the guests on our territory?’, Hashirama's serious side came out.

‘Sakura Haruno and Kakashi Hatake’, said Tobirama. ‘Haruno demonstrated to me her phenomenal medical skills.’

‘Oh, a medic!’, dark-haired Senju exclaimed. ‘We desperately need people of this kind! Would you be interested in-’

Well, Tobirama was uncomfortable using Hiraishingiri on his brother, but by the difference in strength, he had no chance of surprising him any other way. The kunai barely scratched Hashirama's skin, but it was enough to give him his memories back.

‘Forgive me, Anija, but I had no other choice’, Hashirama ignored his sibling's words and hugged both of them with all his might at the same time. 

The younger Senju shook his head in disapproval: Hashirama had not even considered the option that this could be a genjutsu. Tears welled up in his eyes, probably because of all the knowledge that came back to him. Sakura disappeared behind a tree to change into a better outfit. As soon as she showed back up, Tobirama felt that looking was a mistake. The kunoichi looked so fierce and powerful in her traditional armour, a dark green much like the one Kakashi was wearing. The other pieces of the outfit, including the hakama, were black. She attached a tantō to her belt and put on a pair of strengthened sandals. The younger Senju felt something odd again, but this time he was not as distressed. Now she was in his time, so she had to play by his rules. 

‘Tobirama, I lost a member of my team a week ago’, she said. ‘Don't piss me off with your staring.’

Well. It looked like getting her to conform to his rules was going to be harder than he thought. He sighed heavily and looked away. He had no desire to repeat the last encounter where he had to think about picking his ribs up from the floor. However, he decided to memorise that the topic of dead team members was off-limits. Easy enough.


	20. is it weakness to refuse to do harm?

Hashirama was an exception among the Senju. The other clansmen eyed the newcomers suspiciously, but since they were vouched for by the two most powerful members of the clan, there was nothing they could do. Hatake was initially given the task of manual labour, but Hashirama insisted that he would watch over Kakashi himself. Of course, he was still denied access to the strategic plans, but at least he had the opportunity to train with the First Hokage. Sakura was reluctantly allowed access to those in need of medical attention, and even then only on the condition that she be under constant observation. The kunoichi had to deposit her armour and weapons in the designated area, which she did without complaint. She raised an eyebrow when she learned that it was Tobirama who had been assigned to watch over her actions.

‘Senju-sama’, she acknowledged his presence.

‘Disregard my presence, medic’, he professionally switched to the cold tone he used in conversation with almost everyone. 

The sight of Sakura at work was quite relaxing. No movement she made was unnecessary. The medical arts were not among the trivial, yet Haruno made healing look easy. She handled severe cases quicker, better and more efficiently than the best of the clan medics. Tobirama compared his memories with what he saw now. Sealing them meant they would not be overwritten, so he was able to judge the changes. The first hours of the two's presence and already several lives had been saved unlike in the first course of this event. Patients came out of the tent astonished and fully recovered. Grateful wives and mothers would drop off meals for Sakura as a form of giving their thanks.

‘Tobirama, eat something’, she requested quietly when the last of the patients had left. ‘You have managed to look healthier.’

‘This is an interesting observation since you have only seen me as a reanimated corpse before’, Senju remarked amusedly. ‘I will eat later.’

‘I do not want to cause a diplomatic scandal by forcing food into the mouth of the second in line clan head’, well, Tobirama knew that Sakura was capable of fulfilling her threat. ‘Eat.’

‘So be it’, he sighed and started eating one of the dishes. ‘I doubt these women would be pleased to know that I am the one eating the meals meant for you.’

‘This amount of food is ridiculous for one person’, she argued. ‘They must have known I would not eat it all by myself and would offer you some.’

‘Doubtful’, he muttered and did not elaborate on his thought.

Suddenly someone burst into the tent and overpowered Sakura before she had time to realise what was happening. A muscular man pressed her to the ground with his knee. He would not risk something like that if he knew of her strength. Luckily for him, the kunoichi had no plans to reveal her skills anytime soon.

'Lord Tobirama, don't eat anything that has been near this wicked wench!" the clansman exclaimed and grabbed the woman by the hair. 'There were poisoned blades among your belongings! You tried to take advantage of Lord Hashirama's kindness, eh?’

‘'I am a medical kunoichi,' Sakura said with difficulty, trying not to inhale the dust from the ground. 'I assure you those blades were not meant for any Senju.’

'Lying bitch,' growled the ninja and pressed his knee harder against her spine. 'Lord Tobirama, permission to-'

'Stand up and apologise,' the coldness in his voice surprised even Sakura. 'Haruno was brought to our camp after being under surveillance for months. Are you doubting the validity of my decision?'

‘O-Of course not,' stammered the shinobi, his confidence evaporating. 'I beg your forgiveness, Tobirama-sama.’

'I am not the one you should be apologizing to,' Senju replied. 

‘My suspicions were fully justified’, the man answered quietly. ‘If Lord Tobirama wishes it, I will apologise to you, medic. But I will keep an eye on you.’

Senju walked out, anger evident on his features. Sakura sighed and massaged her sore back.

‘Thanks. Had you not intervened, I could have snapped’, she said and corrected herself immediately. ‘Well. I would have snapped. Because of you, he got out of here alive, albeit with a bruised pride.’

‘He insulted you and you are concerned about his life?’, Tobirama lifted his eyebrows and snorted. ‘Extraordinary.’

‘I do have experience in this field,' she sighed heavily. ‘After all, Sasuke used to do the same. He nearly killed me. Several times. And I was still worried about him. Just when I thought everything was going to be okay, he hurt me again with that damn letter and the fact that...'

‘So he is the team member you have lost?’, asked Tobirama and he bit the inside of his cheek, uncertain of what to say. 'Would you rather talk about it or forget about it?’

‘This is probably the most reasonable question I have heard regarding this whole situation’, admitted Sakura. ‘I wish to put it behind me.’

‘Come with me’, he said. ‘We can spar.’

‘Gladly’, her soft smile reassured Tobirama that he had handled the situation well. ‘I will just take my equipment. By the way, I have your happuri and armour sealed in one of the scrolls.’

For a moment Tobirama wondered what Sakura would look like in facial armour. 

‘I will retrieve them on a later occasion’, he immediately dismissed the previous thought. ‘I shall come with you, should another of my clansmen assault you.’

Haruno nodded in acknowledgement. Tobirama left the tent first, followed by Sakura. Her back was straight and her gaze was fixed on the ground. She tried not to give the impression of being too boisterous and confident. The future Hokage did not particularly like this transformation, although he understood its necessity. On the other hand, he had wanted her to behave like a traditional woman before. He rarely had such dilemmas, so he was not entirely sure what to do. They approached the storage room protected by two men.

‘Bring Haruno's belongings’, ordered Tobirama and the two guards exchanged glances.

‘Please forgive me, my Lord, but the general has forbidden us to give out any of her equipment before inspecting everything’, answered one of them. 

‘My authority is above that of the general’, the apparent calm in Tobirama’s voice made one of the guards involuntarily swallow audibly. ‘I guarantee that the next refusal will be your last mistake.’

The men immediately opened the door of the storage room and brought out Sakura's belongings. The kunoichi looked at them carefully and found that nothing was missing except the poisoned blades. She picked up her gear and suddenly everyone fell silent. Then she realised her mistake - she was not supposed to be able to carry it all at once with such a tiny body. They were only to know that she was a kunoichi. She refrained from cursing under her breath.

'Ignore them', whispered Senju so that only the medic heard it.

The man led her to the quarters intended for her. It was a tent much smaller than the medical one. There was absolutely nothing inside, and while Sakura was certainly used to such conditions, Tobirama made a mental note to bring her at least a blanket. He also noted that some of the fabric at the entrance was deliberately torn to take away her privacy. The clansmen's lack of trust was evident.

‘Put on your armour’, he said. ‘I will wait outside and make sure that no one tries to look at you.’

‘I appreciate your kind gesture, Lord Tobirama’, she replied politely, feeling that she was being listened to.

He nodded and left the tent. Moments before, he had already sensed the chakra of one of his clansmen and knew that Sakura had as well. With his back, he covered the entrance. The bulky man approached Tobirama with a proud step.

‘Why are you ordering my people around?’, snapped the general. ‘Never think that being Lord Hashirama's brother grants you such power. Your being second in line to be head of the clan means nought. You are young and inexperienced. I fought alongside your esteemed father and you do not resemble him one bit.’

‘Takahiro, I outrank you’, answered Tobirama and his eyes narrowed. ‘I have full authority to revoke your unreasonable decisions.’

‘‘Now, pray tell, what is unreasonable about acting for the good of the clan?’, the man crossed his arms. ‘I sent one of my men to eliminate the threat and I was confident you would act appropriately, yet you protected someone who had poisoned blades on her. The decisions you and your brother made put Senju at risk!’

Sakura listened to the conversation and her heart started beating faster. Was it a good decision to go back to the past? Maybe now they had jeopardized Tobirama and Hashirama's position? What if they were banished? She was ready but hesitated for a moment. It hardly seemed that the men would end the dispute quickly, so she decided to go out.

‘Bloody assassin’, hissed the general. ‘Spy!’

He pulled out a kunai and launched himself in her direction, but Tobirama stopped his blade with one finger and caught him by the wrist.

‘Stop’, he ordered. ‘This woman healed your people, and you dare attack her?’

‘It could have been a trick’, Takahiro argued stubbornly. ‘She could have been trying to deceive us.’

‘Get out of my sight’, Tobirama began to lose patience and squeezed the man's hand, crushing the bones of his wrist; although he lacked Sakura's demonic strength, he was still capable of seriously injuring someone. ‘Haruno is trustworthy and I vouch for her. So is Hatake.’

'Lord Tobirama, step aside, please,' Sakura said calmly, and the general was about to shout disrespect, but the soothing gaze of emerald eyes stopped him. 'Takahiro-sama, may I look at your wrist? I promise to restore it to full function.’

‘'I...', the man began to speak, enchanted by the green eyes. 'I suppose... if my people trust you, so should I.’

The glow of bright chakra, its pleasant coolness and Sakura's gentle smile made the anger completely leave the general. He watched in disbelief as his bones returned to their original shape and no longer protruded oddly under the skin. He felt some pain, but less than with the crushed bones. He suddenly felt foolish for almost causing the death of this talented healer, but refused to apologize to her. After all, it could still be a trick. Nevertheless, he submitted to the treatment without complaining. When she moved her hand away, the general flicked his wrist a few times. No pain, no discomfort. _Unbelievable,_ he thought.

‘Take charge of the camp until mine or Hashirama's return’, said Tobirama, a little annoyed that Haruno decided to heal the arrogant warrior. ‘Sakura and I leave the camp to train.’

'Understood, Lord Tobirama,' the man replied, still shocked at how instantly his hand was healed. 

* * *

The armour gave Sakura confidence. She had always admired formidable heavily armoured warriors, and now she could become one herself. As she stood against Tobirama on the training field, she felt it even more strongly. 

'Since you are a taijutsu specialist and I am better at ranged techniques, we shall not restrict ourselves to one style,' the Senju announced and assumed a battle stance. 'Attack me first.’

Sakura jumped towards him and was surprised to find him not trying to dodge her blow. A wall of water appeared in front of her when her fist was just inches from his chest. The strong pressure threw her backwards. She immediately rose and saw the smug smirk on Tobirama's face. Oh, hell no. She knew she was not supposed to give in to her emotions, but arrogant opponents always brought her out of balance. She decided to let him think for a bit that she had not improved one bit in these three months. Again she repeated her blows from several directions and none of them reached Tobirama. A few of his ranged techniques had severely hobbled her. She felt internal bleeding in the liver area but ignored it for now. When she felt that his alertness had sufficiently dropped, she decided to reveal the first of her secrets to him. Kyūshojutsu, the Touch of Death, was something similar to the Hyūga clan's show-off Delicate Fist or the techniques Naruto used in Sage Mode. Sakura's version was much slower but more precise and lethal. When the chakra that the kunoichi's fist gave momentum to broke through the wall of water and went straight for Senju's face, the woman almost laughed. His expression of pure shock was endlessly amusing as he flew across the training field and pierced several trees with his back.

She strengthened her leg muscles with chakra to outpace the man and catch him at the end of his flight. She threw him against the ground and a crater formed under his body. Fortunately, the shock wore off quickly enough for him to roll away from under the murderous chakra-charged heel. He performed a few seals and a pillar of water shot towards Sakura, slamming her against the stone wall. She was sure she cracked a rib or two before she managed to create a layer of chakra that gave her a precious second to escape from under the powerful mass of water. The pressure crushed her legs and she had to use chakra to keep moving them. She deflected the kunais thrown in her direction with a tantō and jumped back when she saw the Hiraishin seal on one of them. Tobirama surged towards her and pinned her to the ground, but she knocked him back a few metres with a flick of her wrist. She charged her fist with chakra and created a huge crater in the middle of the field. Senju was prepared for this and had focused chakra in his feet beforehand to keep his balance. What he had not anticipated, however, was a clone leaping out from under the destroyed ground with a fist aimed at his chin. He leaned back at the last moment and thrust his sword into the clone's abdomen. Instinctively, he let the blade out of his hands when the real Sakura appeared right behind the clone with a fist targeting his face. He took the blow and felt his jaw requiring setting as he fell to the ground. Blood began pouring from his broken nose. The woman obliterated his zygomatic bones.

'Why did you drop your sword, you idiot!" she exclaimed and immediately gathered healing chakra in her hands to heal his face and relieve the pain. 

'By accident,' he slurred out, his voice barely audible because of the blood running down his throat.

‘Don’t bullshit me’, Sakura snapped. ‘You are far more powerful than you were then. I could tell you did it on purpose. Why?'

‘Didn't want to kill you’, he managed to utter those words and winced in pain.

‘As if I could be killed just like that’, she laughed with no mirth. ‘Keep your eyes open.’

She hastily removed all the pieces of his armour when she noticed the way he moved. The fresh blood contrasted with his pale skin and morbidly highlighted the colour of his irises. Using chakra, she extracted bits of crushed bone from his brain through his nose and tossed them aside. She then began to reconstruct the damaged tissue and bones. Then she began to treat the spine, which barely avoided breaking. Tobirama's crimson eyes followed her movements with a curiosity that was downright incomprehensible considering she had nearly crushed his head. 

‘Idiot,' she repeated with anger in her voice, and Senju could have sworn that something akin to a tear flickered in her eyes. ‘Never do something so stupid again. Take me seriously. Stab me, break my limbs, crush a part of my body. Sōzō Saisei will allow me to survive all this and kick your ass later.’

‘Inflicting pain on you proves difficult for me’, halfway through the treatment his voice sounded clearer. ‘I cannot comprehend this.’

‘We are ninjas and must be prepared for anything’, she replied. ‘Would you send a comrade to the battlefield if he never experienced pain?’

‘No’, he admitted simply.

‘So what makes me different?’, the kunoichi asked. ‘The fact that I am a woman? Are you afraid that I am frail and weak?’

'I do not want...', he hissed in pain as his ribs were put back together. 'I do not want you to die. You are a chance for the shinobi world.'

'You too are a chance for the shinobi world, so don't you dare pull off such foolishness another time,' the woman replied and fell silent for a moment to finish the treatment, then, to Tobirama's surprise, she hugged him tightly and immediately jumped away. 'Damn. I forgot about my ribs.'

‘Did I damage them?" the man asked anxiously, but Sakura just removed her armour, rolled up her shirt and Tobirama's eyes saw the swelling. 'I apologise.’

‘Nothing happened, so no need to apologise to me,' she smiled at him. 'I would have endured without treatment, but I need to be at full strength to carry you to camp. I have healed most of your injuries, however, you still should not walk on your own.'

Indeed, he felt considerable pain in his back. As he flew through tree trunks and was thrown against the ground shortly after, even his armour could not fully absorb the impact.

Sakura put her armour back on and used his belt to tie all the pieces of his armour together. She threw Tobirama over one shoulder and his belongings over the other. He wondered what the Senju would think when they saw him in this situation. He deduced from the way the woman moved that her broken ribs were not her only injury. She did not want to admit that he had hurt her more than he thought. 

'Sakura, stop and heal all your wounds,' he demanded.

'Later,' she said carelessly, skipping through the branches of the trees.

'Now,' he argued.

'It's nothing serious,' she replied stubbornly.

'Sakura, I can sense that you need to use chakra to even walk', his sensory skills never failed. 'Stop.'

He heard the woman sigh heavily and felt a powerful mass of chakra released by her. It was most certainly her Yin seal. A minute later her power level returned to normal and Tobirama could no longer sense that she had to support herself with chakra to move. 

'See?', she asked. 'Nothing serious. All it took was a moment.'

'Do you really take me for an idiot?" the man snorted. 'After all, I remember it took you less than a few seconds to heal the hole in your chest.’

‘You want me to admit that you are stronger than me and were able to damage about thirty per cent of my body?’, she teased. ‘Now, I am sure you know that without my comment, but I declare that you are extremely powerful, Tobirama.’

'Thirty per cent?’, he repeated in disbelief. 'Are you serious? You wanted to go back to camp with that kind of damage without treatment?'

'Your grandniece who mentored me was able to return to complete health from damage of eighty per cent of the body’, replied Sakura. ‘Thirty per cent is nothing to her.’

When they returned to camp, Hashirama and Kakashi were already waiting impatiently for them. Seeing his brother battered and Sakura at full strength, the older Senju jumped to the wrong conclusion and almost laughed at his younger sibling, but Haruno immediately led him out of his error and described her injuries. Now Hatake was horrified - how could she let something like this happen? Why had she not used Sōzō Saisei earlier? What if she had been late? He felt like scolding her, but he knew that his friend was a capable kunoichi and knew what she was doing. He just shook his head in disapproval. He, by the way, was no better. Had it not been for the First Hokage's famous medical skills, he would now be a bloody pulp after his clash with Mokuton. Yamato's Wood Style did not compare to Hashirama's masterful level. Only their first day at camp had passed, and they already felt a part of it. It was as if their destiny was to travel through time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Beauty, violence  
> War is within us
> 
> ('Stardust' by IAMX)


	21. preparations and groundwork

Sakura insisted that Tobirama receive further treatment. The man sighed heavily but allowed himself to be transported by his brother to the medical tent. With Hashirama's help, the kunoichi removed the younger Senju's upper garment and scowled, seeing that he had not been healed well before. She even recognized the same torn muscle she had treated during the Fourth Shinobi War. The conditions at the camp allowed her to take a closer look at Tobirama's spine. She healed even the slightest damage. Feeling how tense his muscles were, she used a little more chakra to relax them. 

'Do not waste chakra', he grunted, though he was grateful.  
'I am not wasting it', she assured him. 'Releasing a patient who is not at full strength is a shame for a medic. Lie still.'

He hissed in pain as she began to treat his strained muscle. If he remembered correctly, the damage had occurred when he had picked up a boulder that had fallen on one of the members of his scout squad. Despite the help of several men, he was the one who put in the most effort. When the cool chakra subsided, he realized he was fully healed, but he had no desire to get up. 

'No more risk of damaging your spine, so you can go and rest in your quarters', the woman stated. 'Or here, but I sincerely doubt it will be comfortable for you.'   
'I am sorry, but Tobirama will not be able to rest any longer', Hashirama entered the tent. 'Strategic meeting. You are well aware of the reason for this. There is not much time left, so come.'

A crucial battle was about to take place that no one else knew about yet. Tobirama dressed hastily while Sakura tidied up her work area and rinsed her hands in a bowl of water. Kakashi was already waiting in the underground part of Senju brothers’ quarters.

'Is anyone eavesdropping on us?' when the younger of the two brothers shook his head negatively, Hashirama sighed. 'Good. We know the course of the battle, so let's get to the point. Kakashi knows enough water techniques to assist you in defending the clansmen, Tobirama. We need to make sure that we save as many lives as possible. We certainly cannot manage to protect everyone, but we must try.'  
'Sakura has developed a fighting style based on medical ninjutsu', hearing Kakashi's words, the kunoichi nodded. 'Properly used, it incapacitates opponents without killing them.'  
'Limb muscle paralysis is one possibility', the woman added.   
'It will be more difficult to make the other Senju not try to kill those incapacitated in this way', Tobirama noted. 'One mistake and we could make the situation worse.'   
'Perhaps genjutsu would be a good solution', Hatake suggested.  
'If the Senju detect that we are using illusions on them, we will be considered traitors', Sakura replied. 'Additionally, we could jeopardize Lord Hashiram's position if it came to light that he knew about it.’  
'We could eliminate Madara earlier', Haruno cast a warning glance at Tobirama who had made such a suggestion.  
'What if I come out with a peace proposal before the fight even happens?', like typical ninjas, none of those gathered had thought of such a solution as the clan head had proposed beforehand. 'That way, no one else will die.'  
'There is a possibility that the Uchiha will reject our proposal', argued the younger of the brothers. 'Then we will be forced to kill Madara.'  
'Tobirama!', Sakura and Hashirama shouted simultaneously to rebuke him.  
'I must admit Lord Tobirama is right', Kakashi stated to his friend's surprise. 'Lord Hashirama, I know Madara is close to you, but if he refuses to accept your proposal, we will have to get rid of him.'  
'You know nothing about Madara', the clan head sighed heavily. 'Do you not understand that he wants peace as much as we do?’  
'Then why has he not offered it?', his younger brother asked.  
‘And why did we not offer it?’, Tobirama had to admit that Hashirama was right. 'This war is as much Uchiha's fault as it is Senju's.’

Sakura admired the fact that Hashirama, raised by war, still followed his dream of peace. The Will of Fire was real, and this man was living proof of its existence. He refused to allow himself to think that his friend could reject the truce. Instead of devising a battle strategy, the four of them spent several hours planning a peace proposal.

'I have some concern about the composition of the delegation', Sakura admitted. 'I'm afraid that some Uchiha might realise that something is wrong with Kakashi's eye.'   
'Do you have any ideas to minimize that risk?', asked Tobirama. 'A seal?  
'If we could apply a seal to the chakra supply channel, it would be virtually impossible to detect any residual chakra', the woman noted. 'Kakashi, what do you think?'   
'I've seen the world through one eye for most of my life', the man sighed. 'You might as well remove and destroy it.'  
'What if I cut this duct out instead?', the kunoichi suggested. 'You would see normally with no more ability to activate the Sharingan.  
'I'm astonished by your reckless approach to health, Kakashi', Hashirama remarked, and concern was evident in his eyes. ‘Is your eye so unimportant to you?’  
‘It is not mine', he shrugged. ‘I merely happen to be the one owning it.’

In the end, it was decided that Sakura would carry out the operation. The surgical precision of her movements meant that it only took her a few seconds including stopping the bleeding. She used earth chakra to turn the cut channel into dust. Kakashi blinked a few times and raised his hand. 

'Don't rub that eye,' she scolded him, but he did it anyway and winced. 'Didn't I tell you?’  
‘Couldn’t help myself’, Hatake grinned. ‘Lord Hashirama, what time do you consider appropriate for setting off?’  
‘I would love to leave immediately, but we need to rest and inform the clansmen of our departure’, the older Senju said and Sakura agreed with both parts of his answer. ‘I suggest that we retire to sleep. It is getting quite dark.’  
‘I do not consider it appropriate for Hatake and Haruno to sleep in tents’, remarked Tobirama. ‘According to clan members, it was your decision, Anija.’  
‘Tents?’, Hashirama frowned. ‘I specifically said that they should be provided with places in our accommodation.’  
‘It is not a problem!’, assured Sakura despite Tobirama’s doubtful look. ‘We are grateful for any shelter.’  
‘Nonsense!’, exclaimed the clan head. ‘I have already introduced Kakashi to his quarters, but you still have your belongings in the tent, if I understand correctly. Tobirama, would you be so kind to help her retrieve them?’  
‘Come. I realise you could manage on your own, but I will go with you for safety’, the younger of the men said to Sakura and suddenly smirked. ‘For the safety of those who get in your way, naturally.’

Sakura found herself unable to deny that she felt appreciated and was flattered by Tobirama's words, however half-joking they were. She bowed to Hashirama and waved to Kakashi, then left the room along with Senju. They had indeed spent so much time discussing that it was already dark. She assured Tobirama that she did not need any assistance. Haruno entered her tent and began gathering her belongings. Suddenly she felt a cold blade against her throat.

‘You could wrap our leaders around your finger, but not us’, whispered the mysterious figure with a masculine voice. ‘What is your real name?’  
‘I would not do that if I were you’, she decided to warn him, but he just laughed and pressed harder, making some blood appear on her skin. ‘My apologies in advance.’

The kunoichi deftly caught the man's wrist and effortlessly snatched the kunai from his hand. She turned around, covered his mouth and bound his hands with her belt. She led him outside, where Tobirama was waiting with his arms crossed. She forcefully made the man kneel.

‘Is this how you repay her for healing your hand, Takahiro?’, Sakura felt his chakra spiking dangerously. ‘We have reason to trust her as opposed to you. You defy my orders and those of my brother.’  
‘She was just reaching for the weapon in her tent’, he muttered and spat into Haruno's hand, causing her to withdraw it.   
‘The reason she was gathering her things was that you ignored my brother's order and had your men prepare a tent for her instead of assigning her quarters’, Tobirama explained and knelt to look the general in the eye. ‘You are no match for Sakura Haruno. As such, you should be thanking her for sparing you.’  
‘Screw you’, Takahiro growled. ‘Butsuma would never allow such a thing to happen. You and your brother should have died instead of him.’  
‘How dare you insult Lord Tobirama in this way?’, snapped Sakura. ‘I understand the lack of trust in me, but this man along with his brother is acting solely for the good of your clan.’  
‘Enough!’, abruptly Hashirama appeared right next to them and looked gravely at the general. ‘Takahiro, I did not expect such a lack of loyalty and trust on your part.’  
‘Are you going to kill me because I disagree with your ideology?’, looked challengingly into the leader's eyes. ‘Go ahead.’  
‘If you had any knowledge of my ideals, you would have never asked that question’, Hashirama’s soft smile did not suit the situation. ‘Sakura, release him.’  
‘Understood’, she immediately carried out her order.  
‘If you have reservations about my leadership of the clan, come and talk to me’, announced the older Senju. ‘Go get some rest, general.’

The man rose uncertainly from the ground and cast a hateful glance at Haruno, but said nothing more. The kunoichi sighed and went back to gathering her things.

‘Since you have known my brother for a longer time, I will move your sleeping mat into his bedchamber. It is unsafe for you to sleep by yourself’ spoke Hashirama and suddenly kneeled. ‘Forgive me for allowing such a thing to happen.’  
‘This is not your fault, Lord Hashirama’, she assured awkwardly. ‘Tobirama, will that not be a problem? I would not want to impose upon you.’  
‘Your safety is a major priority’, his reply was not unambiguous, making Haruno unsure if she could accept Hashirama's offer.

In truth, Tobirama was completely unfazed by the prospect of sharing a room with Sakura and this lack of concern troubled him. Hence the hesitation in his voice. Still, he understood that the woman was uneasy, not knowing if she would bother him.

‘And your presence is always welcome’, he decided to add and Sakura’s visible relief made him feel better.

Despite her protests, he picked up some of her belongings and led her to his quarters while Hashirama went ahead and prepared a mat and a thick blanket for her. When they arrived, the room was ready. Tobirama gently set her things down on the floor, and Sakura immediately rearranged them, then placed them against the wall so that they took up as little space as possible. As she sat down on her mat, the man kneeled beside a wooden stand with an oil lamp and reached for a scroll and ink. After several minutes of writing, he turned around and, to his surprise, Sakura was continuing to sit still. Judging by her position and closed eyes, she was in the middle of a meditation. Most likely to replenish the lost Yin chakra. He had no desire to interrupt her, yet he was unable to tear his gaze away. In the warm light of the lamp, her hair seemed to burn stronger than the most powerful of Uchiha fire techniques. She resembled a sculpture of a fierce goddess. As if enchanted, he watched the markings that wrapped around her body like snakes. Quite unexpectedly, the woman opened her eyes. Only then did he realise that he had dropped his scroll and stained it with ink.

‘Beautiful, aren’t they?’, she whispered, looking at the markings. ‘I never could tire of watching my mentor as she meditated. I am glad that she passed this technique on to me.’  
‘Truly beautiful’, he confirmed, although he was not sure if he was talking about the markings.  
‘Why are you awake?’, she inquired and frowned. ‘You should be resting.’  
‘I seldom fall asleep once I lie down’, he admitted reluctantly.  
‘Perhaps you would like to join my meditation?’, her question was a pleasant surprise.  
‘I think it would not do me any harm’, he answered, having rethought his words before speaking. ‘Even though I doubt it will help me sleep.'

Another surprise was that Sakura stood up and moved her mat closer. She extended her hand towards him and he awkwardly grabbed it, having never experienced linked meditation. She instructed him to focus on something pleasant and close his eyes. He did as he was told. He thought of a wide, lush forest in the rain. He imagined the smell of wet soil and the touch of damp moss in the evening. Sakura's soothing chakra blocked out any bad thoughts. There were no enemies or traps in his forest. There were only him, the vegetation and the orange sky. He fleetingly noted that his body relaxed. He breathed deeply and slowly as if he were asleep. 

'I cannot get into your mind because you have put up too high walls’, Sakura's voice came to him as if from above the water surface.   
‘How can I destroy them?’, he asked quietly.  
‘Try to pull me into your world forcefully’, the kunoichi suggested. ‘Perhaps it will work then?’

With all his willpower he tried to open some passage for her but in vain. Something constantly held him back and prevented him from touching any of the invisible walls. At last, he gave up.

‘Hopefully next time it will work out’, her pleasant voice comforted him.

Next time. He liked that prospect. For now, Sakura withdrew her hand and interrupted the link, but she sent him a warm, reassuring smile. He returned it as well as he could and promptly passed out. The last thing he heard was Sakura's quiet laughter and the sounds of her moving her mat away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've got this funny feeling that I just can't escape
> 
> ('Stardust' by IAMX)


	22. watching over her like a bird of prey

Tobirama had not woken up so rested for a long time. Oddly enough, he found himself awake after only a few hours of sleep and fully energized. He touched the floor and sensed the steady flow of Sakura's chakra. He squinted to see if the woman was really safe. Despite the darkness, he noticed the pink cascade of her hair flowing down her face. Her breathing was peaceful and even. Senju inspected one more time to see if anyone was lurking nearby and, satisfied that there were no potential enemies, closed his eyes, but after a few minutes, he decided that there was no chance of him falling asleep. Had it not been for the presence of the sleeping Sakura, he could have taken out the scroll now and continued to work out the new technique. He vowed to himself to never use Edo Tensei again - technically, he had yet to create the technique, so he could take the time to develop something less harmful. Tobirama was not a patient man, however, so he finally sighed heavily and carefully slid off his mat. After a moment's consideration, he stood up carefully and quietly set up the byōbu to at least block out some of the light. He then moved the oil lamp stand closer and opened the scroll. The technique he had been working on since yesterday was intended to transfer information. He wanted the characters written on one scroll to appear on the other after letting chakra into it. For now, he was in the planning phase and wrote down his ideas.

‘Can't sleep?’, he turned around to see green eyes watching him curiously from behind the screen.

‘I apologise’, he said, basically disregarding her question. ‘I never meant to disturb your sleep.’

‘I woke up on my own’, she replied and leaned out further to look at the scroll. ‘Working on something of interest?’

‘A communication jutsu’, his answer apparently interested Sakura, because she tilted her head in anticipation of more details. ‘More specifically, I plan to create a technique that allows text to be transferred between two scrolls at a distance.’

‘Do you mind if I watch you work?’, she asked.

‘Not at all’, he agreed to her request, so Sakura picked up her blanket, draped it over herself, and sat down next to him.

He was usually unwilling to handle such requests, yet he could not refuse Haruno. Besides, they had worked on a technique together for a long time and her company did not bother him. The kunoichi studied his notes carefully and seemed to want to say something, but Tobirama was absorbed in his work and failed to notice it. He was concentrated on writing out all the ideas, occasionally crossing something out, and finally, he sighed heavily and rested his head on his hand. Just when Sakura had decided to ask if he was alright, his eyes suddenly lit up. The man reached for another scroll eagerly, almost knocking the lamp off the stand. Haruno already had the opportunity to watch him at work on the seal, but this was much different. The genius was most comfortable working alone and the woman decided not to interfere, lest she knock him out of his rhythm. Besides, something was soothing about just looking at Tobirama while he was preoccupied with his research. The warm light softened his facial features. He sat slightly hunched over and analysed the notes with his crimson eyes. Sakura caught herself staring at him instead of his work. Tobirama froze and for a moment the woman was afraid that he had realised he was being watched, but the uncharacteristic wide grin which appeared on his face denied that possibility. Senju grabbed another two blank scrolls and infused chakra into both, then signed his name on one of them and performed the Bird seal. The ink on one of the scrolls faded and the same writing appeared on the other.

‘It is incredible how you were able to work it out so easily’, Sakura meant her words.

‘It is not a complex technique’, he replied but felt flattered by her praise. ‘Moreover, I have yet to find out at what distance it will be effective.’

Tobirama straightened up and something crunched unpleasantly in his back. He had been sitting in one uncomfortable position for three hours, so it was no wonder. Outside the window, the sky was already beginning to brighten. He only noticed it because the pink reflections among the clouds reminded him of Sakura's hair. This was not a safe line of thought and he felt a strange shiver run down his spine. The woman sitting next to him followed his gaze and smiled softly. That sight reminded her of the beginnings of her friendship with Kakashi when their bond had begun to form during their morning training sessions. Senju made the mistake of turning to look at her and was not even aware that his lips parted slightly at the sight of her calm face adorned with a subtle smile. Her messy pink hair and dreamy green eyes contrasted with the professional mask she so frequently donned. When he had been summoned to her world, he struggled to rid himself of these strange feelings, was sure that once she was the one travelling into the past, his strange predicament would fade away. However, it only seemed to be getting stronger. 

‘Will you mind if I go to training?’, all effect was lost when he heard the reasoning behind her question. ‘Kakashi and I used to train in the early mornings. I see no need to discard this routine.’

‘I shall accompany you and remain for your safety until the end of your training’, he replied, making Sakura wonder for a second why the sudden coldness in his words.

* * *

The sight of Sakura with a wide smile catching fish in the river was not helping Tobirama one bit in being irrationally angry at her for her sudden decision to train with her friend. With her trousers rolled up to her knees and her armour on the riverbank, she efficiently captured their breakfast. Hatake had prepared a campfire to roast their catches, and Senju found no way to keep himself occupied. He was beginning to regret his decision to go with them but changed his mind when the woman served him roasted fish several minutes later. 

‘Enjoy your breakfast’, she smiled and sat down right next to him.

‘The only thing missing is coffee’, Kakashi sighed dreamily.

‘Perhaps Hashirama will share his supply with you’, Tobirama spoke up for the first time since leaving. ‘He has a coffee of superior quality to the powder you offered me.’

‘One more word, and you will never get a single fishbone from me again, Tobirama’, Sakura threatened, clearly offended by his comment. 

‘I guess we didn't do a good job of maintaining the respect typical for these times, did we?’, Hatake smirked and shook his head. ‘Thank you for the meal.’

‘A half of my elemental chakra sealing project is ready to be tested, so pray that this was not your last meal’, Sakura laughed and got up. 'That, or I must prepare to be embarrassed. I have yet to see what will come of it.’

‘You won't know until you try’, the man announced. ‘Lord Tobirama, you are not under any obligation to watch us practice. Should you have major responsibilities-’

‘There is no reason for me to leave’, Senju crossed his arms. ‘You are free to ignore my presence.’

‘Understood, Lord Tobirama’, Hatake nodded respectfully and turned to Sakura. ‘Let's get ready, shall we?’

They rinsed their hands in clean river water. Sakura put her armour back on. Tobirama did not get up from the ground. Under normal circumstances, he would have watched the clash from a tree, but he was aware of Haruno's battle habits, including destroying trees with the bodies of opponents. He had a kunai with the Hiraishin seal on hand to escape should the woman decide to throw Hatake in his direction. They began the spar with taijutsu. Kakashi was no fool and did not try to block her murderous punches. With his superior speed, he managed to grab the woman around the waist and flip her over his back. She landed on one knee and immediately jumped towards her opponent. As she did so, she decided to release the seal containing earth chakra. She concentrated all the released power in her index finger. The man avoided contact with her by a hair's width, and Tobirama precautionarily moved to the other end of the training field, seeing that Sakura was approaching his position. When her finger made contact with the ground, for a moment she felt ashamed because nothing had happened, but suddenly a massive chunk of earth crumbled and fell into the river. 

‘Well, I am glad I avoided that!’, yelled Kakashi. ‘It’s my turn now.’

A purple glow surrounded his right hand as he moved towards Sakura. The rasp of lightning gathered in his palm immediately prompted her to dodge. None of her chakra natures was effective against lightning, plus she was wearing metal armour so she was unable to launch a meaningful counterattack. She concentrated her chakra in her heel and bounced off the ground, leaving a crater behind. Unfortunately, Kakashi without the Sharingan depleting his chakra had admirable stamina, so he continued his pursuit. However much she hated genjutsu, it seemed to be the only option in this situation. Tobirama could not decipher the expression of disgust on her face, but he understood it when Kakashi froze in place. Of course, Sakura would never place him in a cruel illusion; she simply manipulated the environment so that it seemed she had created an even deeper crater in front of him. She had nailed the credibility, having added the smell of wet earth and the sensation of inhaling dust to the genjutsu. He saw through the illusion only a second after it was cast, but that was the amount of time it took Sakura to deliver an accurate kick, impossible to dodge at this distance. Hatake fell on his back and crumbled into dust, having turned out to be an earth clone. Haruno growled - why did she always fall for this? The real Kakashi put a kunai to her neck, but she used a medical ninjutsu to paralyze the muscles in his hand and make the blade fall out of his hand. With chakra, she forced the ground to immobilize his legs, but his Shiden instantly crushed that trap. The lightning chakra restored the muscles of his hand to normal with electrical impulses. 

Standing just a metre away from her, he performed a fire technique; this fireball was impossible to dodge. At the last moment, Sakura created a wall of water that neutralized the fire and created a significant amount of steam. This situation looked very familiar to Tobirama. The woman created three clones, which she ordered to go outside the cloud of steam, and then she jumped towards Kakashi to punch him in the chest with her chakra-charged fist. Apparently, he had the same idea of creating clones in the steam, because this Hatake also turned out to be one, but the next version appeared to be real. The three Sakuras leapt up from the ruined ground and immobilised both his legs and arms with an iron grip. The original cursed quietly; the clones did not recognise the obvious illusion. With her excellent chakra control, she quickly broke the genjutsu, but not quickly enough to avoid her opponent's blow. The combination of steam, lightning chakra, and highly conductive armour was, well, electrifying. She had beaten Kakashi a few times in training, but the man tended to fall for any trick no more than once. This time she only managed to grip his forearm with full force as his technique electrocuted her.

‘You could have used that sealed earth chakra more effectively’, he told her when she used medical ninjutsu to heal her lightning-induced injuries. ‘Nevertheless, I need a bath because, as usual, you managed to make me sweat. The fight was evenly matched.’

‘I like you too much to damage that pretty face of yours, Hatake’, she laughed, oblivious to Tobirama's eyes narrowing in the distance. ‘Did I at least scratch you?’

‘Ah well, you've slightly ruined my right hand’, he replied. ‘Slightly meaning that I'm about to vomit from the pain if it lasts another minute because it hurts like hell.’

Senju approached them to watch the woman's medical ninjutsu in action. He could never get away from that magical sight of all the body structures repairing themselves like it was nothing special. She turned to face him and gave him a broad smile.

‘What do you think, Tobirama?’, she inquired, genuinely curious about his opinion on the fight.

‘Had I not known your skills, I would have called you both madmen with no respect for your lives’, his reply did not seem to please her. ‘However, both of you are phenomenal ninjas, so I have to admit I found this fight highly enjoyable to watch. Sakura, should you be willing to do me the honour of having a second training session together at the next opportunity, I would be delighted.’

‘Oh. I believe Kakashi would be a better opponent for you, but it is a pleasure to hear’, her timid smile and slightly rosy cheeks made it seem as if Sakura had not just destroyed the landscape with one hand. 

‘While it is true that Hatake is more experienced and I have respect for his skills, your abilities are more unique’, Tobirama answered and meant his words. ‘I quite enjoy challenges.’

Well, Kakashi found it impossible to contain the feeling that he was being completely ignored. After all, Senju was talking about him as if he was not next to him having his treatment finished. However, he had to admit that Sakura's abilities were indeed exceptional, and he was not entirely surprised Nidaime wanted to face them again. Besides, Hatake had already trained with Hashirama, so he had no idea why he wanted to fight the other legendary shinobi as well. He felt more at ease with the older Senju, as he reminded him a bit of Naruto and Obito. There was nothing familiar about the younger one on the other hand, but he appreciated his analytical mind and knack for inventions. Suddenly he understood that he just instinctively wanted to protect his friend. A ninja as mighty as Tobirama had been able to inflict such extensive damage on her during a training fight that she had to use Sōzō Saisei to regenerate her body. And this was even though the Senju was holding back. Kakashi dreaded to even think what might have happened if Tobirama had recognized her as a truly equal and proceeded to fight her in earnest. Even such a talented kunoichi could potentially not come out of such a fight alive. After all, Creation Rebirth had its limitations. What he was unaware of was that Sakura had been working on growing stem cells to override the limit on cell divisions. Her body was like a small laboratory on which she conducted dozens of tests and experiments. She had once even thought about modifying her body like Chiyo but had abandoned the idea out of respect for the older woman's memory. Claiming her secrets as her own seemed dishonourable to her.

‘Same goes for you, Tobirama’, another smile made the recipient of these words wonder if his heart could bear it. ‘You are an incredible shinobi and I admire you more with each passing day. Still, I think you might be underestimating Kakashi.’

He had not expected that. Maybe from any average ninja, but not from someone as accomplished as Sakura. Although he knew he was objectively stronger than her, as was Hatake, she should still acknowledge her abilities and give herself proper credit. She had been working hard, and yet she acted as if there was nothing remarkable about it. He wished that would change. On the other hand, such flattery appealed to him greatly. He had always lived in the shadow of his naturally gifted brother and any praise was a booster to his pride.

‘A few months ago you despised me’, he could not refrain from a small biting remark, but smirked. ‘I like this change.’

‘I only despised your hatred for Uchiha’, she corrected him and suddenly looked deep in thought. ‘Well, maybe also your infernal jutsu. And your lack of respect for my friend. And-’

‘Message understood’, he interrupted, the faintest of blushes hidden only because of his happuri. 

‘Lord Tobirama, Sakura, I think that is enough’, Hatake was the voice of reason that stopped their pointless exchange of words. ‘We should return to camp and prepare for the journey.’

‘Right’, the woman said, having realised that she had ignored her friend to throw a snarky remark at Tobirama. ‘Sorry, Kakashi.’

To be honest, Hatake felt uncomfortable. Until now it had been just him and Sakura, and now Tobirama was watching over her like a bird of prey. His motto was to look underneath the underneath. Therefore, he began to wonder if Senju had any ill intentions. Maybe he was just pretending to agree with Haruno's views in order to quietly eliminate her and prevent any changes? On the other hand, his friend was no fool. She had spent a lot of time with Nidaime, so she would surely notice any signs of malicious intent. After all, she was more observant than him in such matters. She was not enchanted by the legendary ninja. Sakura appreciated his accomplishments and advantages, but she spoke directly to him about his mistakes. This honesty was something that could potentially get her into trouble, but the diplomatic talent cultivated by Tsunade usually got her out of it. What if someone had enough of her criticism? Well, it was generally Sakura's manslaying fist that had the final say in the discussion. Physical strength was the only argument that got through to some people.

He had plenty of time for such thoughts, as Sakura insisted she needed a bath immediately, had threatened both men with severe harm for even an accidental glance, and had been in the icy water for several minutes. When she allowed them to turn around, she looked much fresher. Her hair was still slightly damp and seemed to be an even more intense shade of pink. Her clothes were also a little wet, but she seemed not to care at all. The two men had decided to follow her example and now she was the one who had to wait with her back turned to them - she needed no threats to do so. For some reason, the sight of Kakashi's floppy hair infinitely amused Sakura and when she saw his eyes hidden behind a veil of wet fringe, she snorted loudly. Tobirama by some miracle looked dignified even in such a situation, but Hatake simply resembled a wet cat.

‘Now I am simply offended’, he said with feigned resentment.

‘Not my fault you look like something very much dead’, Sakura defended her opinion.

‘Well, at least I don't look like red algae’, Hatake replied. ‘Cast ashore and dried out.’

‘At least algae are useful from a medical point of view’, her quiet remark mildly amused Tobirama, who was generally not a fan of such childish banter.

  
  



	23. clan prone to dramatics

When they returned to the camp, there were other Senju outside beside the guards. Most bowed to Tobirama, and a few less cast suspicious glances at Sakura and Kakashi. Interestingly, it was mainly Haruno who attracted negative attention, though Hatake was her companion and appeared among them at the same time as her. Perhaps they considered the woman an easier target? That would explain why she was the only one attacked. A few individuals sent her warm smiles covertly - mostly those she had treated or their families. The boorish general's men did not even honour Tobirama with a glance to convey that they disagreed with him. However, all three had a more noble goal than pleasing the clansmen. They were heading to Hashirama to begin their diplomatic journey into Uchiha territory under his leadership. The man was already ready to depart, but he took them first to the underground part of the headquarters to speak in privacy.

‘I have informed the other Senju about our plans’, Hashirama said what they had already suspected. ‘As you can guess, they are not thrilled, but I am not going to back down.’

‘General Takahiro is our greatest concern’, remarked the younger of brothers. ‘He seems to have objections to every decision we make, but since the appearance of these two he is outdoing himself.’

‘He is an old man who remembers our father's rule well’, the clan head sighed heavily and rubbed his temples. ‘I am a firm believer in giving second and even third chances, but he may be squandering our chances of an alliance with the Uchiha.’

Were they to allow the final clash between Uchiha and Senju, General Takahiro would lose his life during that battle. However, there was no way Hashirama would decide to take such a step. Everyone was sure that he would never have suggested assassinating the clansman either, however burdensome and harmful his views were. Locking him up in prison, on the other hand, would have reflected badly on the leader's image. Tobirama would most likely have opted for the latter path had he been given the choice. A determined look appeared on the elder Senju's face.

‘If Takahiro lays even a finger on any Uchiha, I will personally fight him’, his decision was unexpected but sensible. ‘If fate wishes me to take his life, I will do so in the name of peace. As ironic and sad as that sounds.’

‘Those years of knowledge we undeservedly gained have made you a wise man, anija’, Tobirama put his hand on his elder brother's shoulder. ‘This may not be necessary, but it is indeed better to consider this possibility in advance.’

‘Believe me, I have faced challenging decisions of this nature far more often than you think’, the man bitterly admitted. ‘Which is not to say that they get easier with time. Quite the contrary.’

‘Lord Hashirama, do you intend to make Madara the First Hokage?’, a question that everyone thought about came from Kakashi's mouth.

‘I do not intend to’, Tobirama already felt that this statement would have further unsatisfactory development. ‘I will do so, with no room for pondering, dilemmas or speculation. Madara has always deserved this position.’

‘Do you think we should seal the memories of the future?’ the younger Senju glanced at Sakura; as usual, she made a good point. ‘Not saying Madara will try to read our thoughts instantly, but there are hundreds of other Uchiha who definitely will not trust us right away.’

‘Indeed, it is not knowledge that should fall into the wrong hands, but if they come across the seal, will they not suspect us of bad intentions?’, Kakashi's comment was also correct.

‘We will trust them’, the firmness in Hashirama's voice indicated that the decision was final. ‘Furthermore, I would be willing to admit to Madara what exactly happened. Maybe not today, but if he accepts the alliance, I consider it inevitable.’

‘Anija, have you lost your mind?!’, Tobirama shouted and slammed the table. ‘That is unreasonable.’

‘I have to agree with Tobirama’, although the man did not expect the kunoichi's approval, he was grateful for her voice of support. ‘He may not believe you and see it as an attempt at manipulation.’

‘So I will allow him to inspect my mind using the Sharingan’, Hashirama said it as if he was talking about giving someone a favourite book rather than access to all the memories. ‘Madara is close to my heart. We all know what a lack of trust has led to.’

‘You astonish me on a daily basis, Lord Hashirama’, the woman sighed heavily and decided to add a bit of dry humour. ‘In the worst-case scenario, Tobirama and I will try to prepare the space-time technique once again. We remember most of it, don't we?’

‘Of course, we do’, he smirked, although for the other two it was not the least bit funny. ‘Who knows, we might even be able to prevent the birth of my foolish brother.’

‘It is unbelievable that my own brother would hurt me like that’, Sakura had her first opportunity to observe Hashirama's famous mood swings and nearly died of embarrassment. 

When the man regained his composure, they decided to depart for the Uchiha lands. All four of them decided unanimously to move traditionally. Tobirama had considerable chakra resources, but they were not unlimited. Using Hiraishin to transport four people sounded exhausting. Hatake and Hashirama ran in the front, while Sakura and the younger Senju were in the back. Due to the need to conserve strength and save time, they did not talk during the journey. Despite the lack of stops along the way, they still only reached their destination after three hours of continuous movement. As soon as Hashirama set foot beyond the border between the lands, several dozen guards faced him.

‘State your business, Senju’, spoke one of them - the squad leader, judging by his distinctive uniform. ‘You have trespassed on Uchiha territory.’

‘I have come with peaceful intentions’, Hashirama raised both hands and stepped forward.’I wish to speak with the leader of your clan.’

‘The final decision to let you through rests with Lord Madara’, the man turned to one of his subordinates. ‘Ryōta, inform Madara-sama about Hashirama Senju's request to meet him.’

‘Understood’, a slender ninja nodded and vanished in a split second.

Only a few minutes later, Madara Uchiha himself stood before them. Sakura knew he was a different person than the one who had started the war, but she felt a shiver run down her spine. The man gave Hashirama a distrustful look. He crossed his arms and activated his Sharingan.

‘None of our sensors has been able to detect any people in the area other than the four of you’, he announced with his powerful voice. ‘That is not to say I can trust you. You will not enter Uchiha territory.’

‘I need not step into your land to speak with you’, the Senju leader was not the least bit offended by the lack of trust. ‘I come with a proposal for a truce. I want peace to be established and for my dear friend to return.’

Having heard these words, the Uchiha opened his mouth in astonishment and promptly deactivated the Sharingan. When he took a step, Tobirama reflexively put his hand on his weapon, but Sakura held out her hand in a restraining gesture. It was because Madara let his sword fall to the ground and moved to embrace his former friend. The woman felt a burning in her eyes as she saw the scene. The Uchiha began to sob, completely unconcerned with the presence of other people. Hashirama's eyes also became filled with tears. The reunion of the two comrades was undoubtedly an emotional event. So much time had passed and so many lives needlessly lost before they decided to take the only right step.

‘The two wonderful people are Sakura Haruno and Kakashi Hatake’, when they broke their embrace, Hashirama decided to introduce them to Madara. ‘If it were not for them, perhaps there would never have been peace between us. You need to know that Sakura is an outstanding medic.’

‘What are you trying to say?’, confusion was clear in his voice.

‘It means our clans will have superb medical care, Madara’, it was close for the Uchiha to be overwhelmed with emotions again. ‘We shall form a united village. In the very centre, there will be entrances to the two districts - Uchiha and Senju - side by side. Oh, or perhaps we will abandon the splitting? Maybe-’

‘Oh, just shut up, Senju’, Madara masked his emotion with humour, but his smile betrayed everything. ‘As usual, you have to be the better one. I should have been the first to reach out.’

‘None of this matters’, said Hashirama and put his hands on his friend's shoulders. ‘I want you to become the leader of the village.’

Tobirama still had not liked the idea one bit, but seeing the delight on Sakura's face, he began to analyse the situation and came to the conclusion that perhaps the benefits of such an arrangement actually outweighed the disadvantages.

‘If I am to be a leader, I must have advisors’, spoke Madara and looked hopefully at Hashirama. ‘Should this choice be final, would you do me the honour of becoming my advisors, Hashirama, Tobirama?’

It was the last thing the younger Senju expected. He had started to believe more and more that Sakura had been right when she had called Madara an honourable but misguided man during the Fourth Shinobi War. Somehow, he felt ashamed. He had always considered himself morally superior to all Uchiha, but now it was Madara who appeared to be the better man. He had never thought to make someone from the other clan his advisor. 

‘I admit it’, he leaned over to Sakura and whispered in her ear. ‘You were right.’

‘Elder brother, what is the matter with you?’, all of a sudden, another dark-haired male appeared on the border. ‘How come you are talking to the filthy Senju?’

‘Izuna, Lord Hashirama arrived with a proposal for a truce’, explained Madara with a smile, but the hateful look did not disappear from the face of the younger sibling.

‘After slaughtering our brothers they propose a truce?’, he snapped. ‘I refuse to accept that!’

‘In what were our brothers inferior to yours?’, Tobirama’s crimson eyes narrowed. ‘As far as I know, we all lost loved ones during that war and the number of casualties was even.’

‘One of your men murdered my ten-year-old little brother’, Izuna exclaimed and grabbed the man's collar. ‘Do you think I can forgive you?’

‘Kawarama was seven’, the empty look on Senju's face made Izuna loosen his grip and look for some indication of a lie, but in vain. 

‘This is not a competition of suffering’, Hashirama interjected. ‘We must put an end to this.’

‘You are not going to dictate terms to us, you scum!’, Izuna's eyes lit up with red and a fraction of a second later, his sword was headed towards Tobirama and the woman standing next to him reflexively jumped between the sword and his body.

Sakura prepared to release the Yin seal, but instead of feeling the piercing pain, she was pushed back and fell into Tobirama, sending him to the ground. She crawled off the man and realized with horror what had happened. Madara Uchiha had taken upon himself the blade that was meant for Tobirama. The sword had pierced his armour and stomach straight through, and his blood splashed Sakura's face. Hashirama immediately dropped to his knees beside his friend and yanked the sword from his body to Sakura's displeasure.

‘Anija…’, muttered Izuna and immediately grabbed his bleeding brother in his arms. ‘Why…’

‘Forgive me for interrupting a dramatic scene, but you have to step aside, Izuna-san’, spoke Sakura and stood up immediately. ‘I am a medic. Let me save him.’

‘It is a fatal wound’, mumbled Madara. ‘Do not waste your efforts.’

‘Stop being dramatic and let me see that injury!’, Haruno yelled, disregarding all the required courtesy.

The Uchiha was so baffled that he went silent at once and began to pull off his armour with difficulty, but Tobirama was quicker and allowed Sakura access to the wound. The kunoichi knelt next to him and pushed the man's clothing away enough to see the gaping hole in the wound. She concentrated chakra in her hands and proceeded to heal. Well, Madara hoped that in the future the kunoichi would show him her skills praised by Hashirama, but not in such a way. However, he had to admit that there was no exaggeration in his friend's commendations. He had never seen anything like this - the medical techniques used on the battlefield were only used to stop bleeding. There was no possibility of restoring any organs.

‘Anija, you could have died!’, Izuna fell to his knees, seeing that his brother was almost healed. ‘How could you jump in front of my blade?’

‘I could not allow any Uchiha to spill even a drop of Senju blood after Hashirama's words’, replied Madara and smiled. ‘Our truce will come into effect. Due to this kunoichi's actions, I will be able to oversee this. What's your name, medic?’

‘Sakura Haruno, Lord Madara’, she replied and bowed. ‘Please forgive me for my disrespectful words. I… I seem to have a problem with that.’

Tobirama bit his lip to prevent himself from laughing. He had heard apologies of this nature many times before, and he expected that more outbursts of fury from the demonic kunoichi awaited Madara. Contrary to popular belief, Tobirama was much more patient than the head of the Uchiha clan, so he was a little concerned about Haruno. On the other hand, he was sure she was capable of handling Madara's rage. 

‘Without hesitation, you saved my brother from death, which would have been my fault’, Izuna cupped both of Sakura's hands and looked into her eyes, deactivating the Sharingan beforehand. ‘My gratitude towards you is indescribable, Sakura-san.’

‘I did what any medic would do’, she said and withdrew her hands slowly, so as not to offend the man by her hasty disruption of this touch. 

‘I sincerely doubt that any medic would have been able to save him from that wound, but your modesty is admirable’, a gentle smile adorned a face that was so familiar to her. 

‘Sakura, you have Madara's blood on your face’, Tobirama's remark was unnecessary, but he was annoyed by Izuna's sweet words and deliberately decided to spoil the mood, for which Sakura was sincerely grateful.

‘Well, yes’, she replied and tried to wipe it off with the palm of her hand, but Senju's raised eyebrows told her she had failed. ‘Could you help me?’

Under normal circumstances, Tobirama would have felt too awkward to do so, but annoyance at Izuna's oversweetened gratitude clouded all discomfort. He made sure to send him a warning glance as he used chakra-based water to softly wipe the blood off Sakura's forehead, nose and chin. He tried not to think about how exceptionally smooth her skin was.

‘Don't be so gentle’, she laughed quietly and Tobirama thought his heart had stopped, having processed her words. ‘That tickles.’

Bloody hell. She should not say such things, under any circumstances, in any context. Never. No. Simply no. Tobirama felt like he had drunk his brother's entire coffee supply and got a heart palpitation. It was supposed to be easier once the technique was done, and it was getting harder. The worst part was that he no longer wanted to distance himself at all. He quickly finished washing the blood off her face and began looking at the clump of moss with unusual interest. Fate punished him for his mistakes in the cruellest way. Damn, just what was going through her mind? The expression of slight surprise on her face suggested whatever that was, it was definitely not what had just flashed through Tobirama's thoughts. Now he felt even worse. Great. A legendary ninja defeated by his own treacherous brain. He was just glad that the other shinobi in emotional matters were similarly stunted as he was and failed to notice his struggle.


	24. throwing trees is not hand-to-hand combat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW: alcohol

Using the moss merely as a distraction and actually taking an interest in it was the most Tobirama thing to do. When they returned to the Senju camp, they had with them the hope of a new future, several bottles of the Uchiha clan's renowned booze, and plant samples. At first, they were not too enthusiastic about drinking alcohol before officially allying, but Sakura assured them that if necessary she could force their bodies to metabolize alcohol in seconds. Tobirama walked around the camp to see if everything was going well in their absence. He then went to secure the obtained moss samples in his bedroom. Having taken off his armour, he went to the agreed place - by the river, where they were to celebrate their success by a bonfire. He had to admit that it made him feel quite good to see all three of them waiting for him. Well, he had somewhat expected them to at least start drinking already. He took a seat next to Hatake, meaning opposite his brother and Haruno. He complimented her in his mind as she analysed the ingredients of the liquid before Hashirama poured it into the cups. 

'No poison,' she concluded. 'Well, aside from the alcohol itself…’

'I believe it was unnecessary’, insisted Hashirama. 'We have to put our trust in them.’

‘Should we all drop dead, there would be no one left to put their trust in Uchiha’, Tobirama scoffed and eyed the liquid suspiciously. ‘There is nothing wrong with caution.’

‘Let's just get drunk’, Kakashi's suggestion seemed to appeal even to Tobirama; everyone was tired of war, Senju even doubly so. ‘Sakura has already declared this thing safe.’

Sakura drank her first serving of sake in Tsunade's office when she was fifteen. Though she was young, Godaime reasoned that the ninja never knew if they would live to see another day, so they had to make the most of life. Despite being used to the taste of alcohol, she felt tears come to her eyes. Whatever it was, it burned her throat as if she had swallowed a Katon jutsu. She glanced discreetly at the other men. Tobirama kept a stony face, though his cheeks visibly reddened. A wide grin spread across the elder Senju's face. Kakashi, on the other hand, looked as if he was about to breathe fire. All three were noticeably relaxed, which pleased Sakura. The burning sensation subsided and was replaced by a pleasant warmth and lightness of mind. A gentle breeze cooled her burning cheeks.

‘I hope we can do this again with all the Senju and Uchiha around one huge bonfire’, announced Hashirama, staring into the fire. ‘Thank you, my dear friends. Without you, all this would have developed fundamentally differently. Now I believe that Madara will not lose his faith in peace.’

‘Perhaps you would like to tell us about him, Lord Hashirama?’, Kakashi asked, having regained his composure.

‘Ah, he was an insufferable kid. Easily lost his temper’, Hashirama laughed heartily. ‘We first met at this river, a few kilometres from here. We realized very quickly that we were both ninjas, but that never stopped us from becoming friends. It started with throwing stones on the other side. Madara had a lot of strength, but he was tossing at the wrong angle. Surely he would have figured it out faster if he was able to use Sharingan, but he was not allowed to reveal his identity to me. Perhaps that was why he was so frustrated. Nevertheless, he was very observant even without those eyes. Our bond deepened when we shared the same loss, not knowing that members of our respective clans were responsible for it. We trained together. Madara inspired me to create new techniques and constantly strive to improve. I think we knew from the beginning who the other was - the Uchiha have a very distinctive, noble sort of beauty, and the Senju are forest people, you can easily tell by our behaviour. We just kept quiet about it so as not to damage the relationship. When our father, Butsuma, ordered Tobirama to follow me and thus learned of our meetings, he decided to prepare an ambush. The head of the Uchiha clan had a similar plan. Madara and I managed to stop our fathers from murdering Izuna and Tobirama, but since then we have only met as opponents on the battlefield.’

Kakashi looked charmed by the story of their friendship. He sat closer to the First Hokage, leaving Sakura and Tobirama alone in comfortable silence with no hint of awkwardness. The man watched the heat of the flames dance in her wise eyes and admired the lack of apparent discomfort as she downed the fiery booze. She appeared to be deep in thought, so rather than disturb her, he emptied his own cup and basked in strange ease. 

‘What about you, Tobirama?’, Sakura moved closer to the man and inquired in a whisper, while Kakashi was busy talking to the elder Senju. ‘I would like to know what your childhood was like. Apart from the war.’

‘My childhood? Well, the war affected every area of my life, so there was not much else’, he admitted. ‘I lost my mother and all my brothers except Hashirama. From the time I was six years old, my sensory abilities were used on the battlefield. I always thought adults were wrong, yet I found myself mirroring their behaviour.'

‘Have you always had such a penchant for inventions?’, her question surprised him, though he did not know why. 

‘It was only years later that I started to enjoy it’, he replied and poured himself another drink. ‘At first, my approach was purely pragmatic. I refused to do anything that was not to help defeat the Uchiha. As a matter of fact, why do you ask?’

‘I will only tell you if you promise not to repeat this to your brother’, she said and he nodded in acknowledgement. ‘I think it is unfair that you are being left out. You are a brilliant researcher and warrior, you have created and developed so many techniques. Hashirama is also a remarkable man, but he owes most of his achievements to talent, not hard work. Well, I am more like you in that sense. You deserve greater appreciation.’

Fortunately, it was too dark for Sakura to see the blush on his cheeks. He had rarely been appreciated in his youthful years or even as Hokage. To the point that during the Fourth Shinobi War, he found out Naruto Uzumaki was using his Shadow Clones without knowing who created them. His inventions were used, but his contribution to their existence was not remembered. Maybe he deserved to be treated worse because of the Uchiha's discrimination, but it hurt him a little all the same. Now he was hearing kind words that were not false flattery. Sakura truly meant it and her compliments made him feel warm. Or maybe it was the effect of the alcohol he had consumed?

‘That was… unexpected, but most appreciated’, he muttered at last and she smiled at him.

‘Would you like to have another drink?’

‘Tobirama, it is very rude to offer alcohol to only one participant in the event’, Hashirama yelled. ‘Come closer. I hope you did not drink without us, otherwise, I will be greatly displeased!’

‘Anija, you have obviously consumed more alcohol than I’, the younger Senju replied, but complied with his request anyway.

‘Sakura, you will be pleased to hear that Kakashi has suggested we build a research lab for you!’, announced the clan head and drunken Hatake frowned. 

‘It was meant to be a surprise, Hashirama’, he mumbled.

‘Hashirama, huh? I see you guys made friends over booze’, she smiled and took a bottle in her hand. ‘I think Tobirama is more deserving of a lab. For me, it will suffice if some more spacious rooms are built under the hospital.’

‘Not an option’, interfered the said man. ‘You will reside in the Senju district.’

‘You? Approving of someone from outside the clan enough to allow them to even enter our grounds?’, the leader laughed loudly. ‘Time has changed you, brother.’

‘Haruno has proven herself to be trustworthy’, explained Tobirama, not liking the direction this conversation was moving in. ‘So did Hatake. They both deserve a place among the Senju.’

‘Your clansmen will probably tear us apart when they learn of this particular decision’, Kakashi shook his head. ‘Dedicating an entire house to non-clan members is possibly far too much for them to understand, Lord Tobirama.’

‘Have you finished?’, Sakura asked and shook the bottle. ‘Another word and I drink it myself.’

A few seconds later the four cups were full again. The woman almost dropped the one given to Tobirama when his fingers accidentally brushed her wrist. They both instinctively withdrew their hands as if suddenly electrocuted and looked away. Sakura was not liking what had just happened one bit. She found it impossible to deny Tobirama's physical attractiveness, but she had long since sworn to herself that she was a kunoichi first, a medic second, a scientist third, and a woman last. So far, shedding any feelings of that sort had come easily to her. She figured the sudden struggle was a matter of alcohol. Haruno tightened her fingers on the cup and felt it begin to crackle dangerously. Unexpectedly she picked it up, drank its contents in one gulp and stood up.

‘Kakashi, let’s spar’, said with confidence in her voice, and three pairs of eyes sent her a puzzled look.

‘Now?’, he asked, but got up anyway. ‘I haven't trained at night for a long time, so…’

‘You were supposed to fight me’, hearing Tobirama's words, she immediately began to regret her decision to vent her strange feelings through physical violence. ‘Scared?’

‘In your dreams, Senju’, she probably should have not let herself be provoked like that, but she could not care less. 

Kakashi returned to his seat, Tobirama gave him a strange look and finished his portion of alcohol in the same fashion Sakura did. His brother watched the two with curiosity. 

‘Only taijutsu this time’, Tobirama announced. ‘Chakra is likely to fluctuate under the influence of alcohol.’

‘My chakra control is impeccable, so speak for yourself’, she smirked and launched herself at him with her elbow aimed at his face.

He easily dodged the blow, but Sakura seemed more aggressive than usual. She landed steadily on both feet and decided to use a move of one of her former masters. She leapt into the air, and Kakashi immediately recognized Konoha Gōriki Senpū despite his drunken state. Tobirama had not had the opportunity to witness this attack earlier, and now the sole of Sakura's boot hit his chest. He had not expected such speed and wondered if it was a matter of her lack of armour restricting her movements, or perhaps anger of unknown cause. The kick seemed to push all the air out of his lungs and he made a wheezing sound as he fell to the ground. The alcohol had slowed his reaction time considerably and he somewhat regretted his decision. He had been a little cocky in offering the kunoichi a clash in such a state. It took him a mere fraction of a second to roll to the side before her fist hit his stomach. Judging by the way she wobbled as she straightened up, the alcohol was affecting her as well. Being Tsunade's apprentice also had some non-obvious advantages. Hashirama nearly fainted from the shock as the young woman snatched a tree along with its roots with her bare hands and threw it at her opponent. Tobirama was unsure if that still counted as taijutsu, but he was afraid of bringing it to her attention, so he simply dodged the flying object. This spar was definitely a bad decision. Still, the Senju was not one to give up easily, so he prepared a plan of attack. All he had to do was immobilize Sakura in some way. Her monstrous strength did not make this task any easier, but it was the only option. He decided to take a risky step and moved directly at her. Tobirama expertly dodged her blow and crushed her to the ground with his entire weight. She looked at him with wide eyes, very aware of the position they were in.

‘Looks like I won’, he whispered with a smirk.

‘I admit that you are faster than me, but I am stronger than you even without using chakra’, she replied just as quietly. ‘Did you notice that?’

Well, he missed it and was impressed. After a while, recognition gave way to horror. Had she really uprooted the tree without supporting her muscles with chakra? He began to rise slowly, without breaking eye contact. He did it too slowly, as she grabbed him by the hair and pulled him towards her. Indecent thoughts ran through his head only for her forehead to smash into his nose with full force.

‘That's why I wanted to fight Kakashi and not you!’, she crawled out from under him and yelled, starting healing him. ‘You have irritated me so much that I had to unwind.’

‘Me?’, he frowned. ‘What have I done wrong? Was it something I said?’

‘Just shut up’, she snapped and sighed heavily. ‘Look, I apologise. I'm not used to…’

‘To what?’, Tobirama encouraged her when she fell silent. 

‘Let’s not talk about it’, she was so stubborn that he just rolled his eyes. ‘Don’t do that.’

Of course, he did just that. Again.

‘Do you already miss your broken nose?’, Haruno snarled and looked away. ‘Just stop.’

‘So tell me what I did wrong’, he insisted.

‘Are you two alive?’, Sakura was infinitely grateful to Hashirama, who decided to look for them at this moment. ‘We need to get back to camp. Kakashi has not kept up with the pace and is having a nap by the bonfire.’

‘We are on our way!’, she replied loudly, got up and looked at Tobirama with narrowed eyes. ‘Not a word about it.’

Sakura threw Kakashi over her shoulder like a sack of potatoes, Tobirama put out the fire, and Hashirama collected the bottles and cups. They walked back to camp in silence and about halfway there the younger Senju had an epiphany, or at least he thought so. 

‘You are upset because I wanted to force you to live in the Senju quarters again, is that right?’, he asked quietly enough so that Hashirama would not hear the question. ‘This all happened after I suggested it, or rather announced it. My apologies.’

‘Yeah’, she lied. ‘Thank you for taking this into account.’

‘I understand that you value autonomy, but you could have told me that’, Sakura was currently in awe of how oblivious Tobirama was.

What was ironic and amusing about the whole situation was that Haruno had been equally clueless about his feelings. Neither of them allowed themselves the thought that the other could have similar sentiments for quite a long time after that. For the time being, they returned peacefully without further incident. Tobirama was so tired that by the time he went to sleep, he failed to notice the woman had pushed her mat even further and turned to face the wall.


	25. impending storm

As is often the case after consuming alcohol, the first feeling accompanying Sakura upon waking up was an embarrassment. As a medic, she was well aware that the body's natural reactions were something not to be ashamed of. What she was concerned about was the emotional part of her behaviour. Over the years she had gotten pretty good at masking her fiery temper. Tobirama showed up and suddenly all efforts to build a balanced personality seemed to have been in vain. It was true that she had grown fond of him, but at the same time, he irritated her by bringing out the side of her she tried to suppress. This was the second time she had attacked him over her simmering rage. The first time because he had unknowingly insulted her friend. The second time because he had made her body react in ways she wanted to avoid. He accidentally touched her hand and she backed away as if she got burned? What was that supposed to mean? Such behaviour was, in her opinion, unbecoming of a kunoichi. The woman decided to force herself to be professional. 

She got up from her mat and took clean clothes to take a bath in the river. Before that, however, she thought it would be a good idea to check on Kakashi's state. Hashirama's regenerative abilities were legendary and he probably never had to worry about something as trivial as a hangover, but Hatake was known for being a ridiculous lightweight. Before leaving, she turned to look at Senju sleeping on the other side of the room and frowned. The man had covered himself with a blanket up to the top of his head, presumably to protect himself from the sunlight. At first, she planned to distance herself completely but figured shock therapy would be most effective. She resolved to force herself by all means available to treat him in an exclusively friendly manner just as she had treated Kakashi. That is why she knelt next to him and gently moved the blanket away to soothe his headache with medical chakra. She had done this many times before when Tsunade had overdone it with the amount of sake in her office. Seeing that his face was relaxed again and he was no longer trying to pull the blanket over himself, she stood up and left the room.

Well, Kakashi was in a miserable state. She tried to take her steps as lightly as possible, but the slightest creak made the man groan pathetically. Sakura dealt with him the same way she did with Tobirama. Hatake rose from the mat, leaning back on his hand. Even though his head no longer hurt, he still put his palm to his forehead. 

‘Alcohol is a poison’, he murmured and sighed dramatically. ‘Ah, but such lovable poison. Like the touch of a stunning woman who leaves you wanting and red-hot.’

‘I… I… what the  _ fuck _ , Kakashi?!’, her cheeks grew so red that her intense pink hair paled in comparison. ‘Did you get it from that perverted book?’

‘Yeah’, he said and flopped upon the mat again. ‘Master Jiraiya always included the most exquisite poetic analogies in Icha Icha Paradise.’

‘I'm glad this book isn't here’, she sat down beside him, albeit cautiously, bearing in mind the quote from a moment ago. ‘Feeling better now? We need to start preparing for the journey soon. Madara-sama and Hashirama-sama have chosen a meaningful place to sign the peace treaty and it will take us a while to get there.’

‘I probably need an ice-cold bath’, he admitted. ‘You got rid of my headache, but I still feel like someone has chewed me up and spit me out.’

‘Same here’, she replied. ‘We can go together if you promise not to look at me.’

‘No need to worry, it was just a joke’, he calmed her down. ‘Just let me get my things and I'll come with you.’

While waiting for Kakashi, the woman decided to check on Hashirama for peace of mind. He stood at the window and observed the inhabitants of the camp. When she stepped inside, she was greeted by his cheerful smile. Sakura noticed the furnishings of the room. Befitting a good leader, he had no luxuries in his quarters - just a sleeping mat, scrolls and writing utensils. Unlike Tobirama, he did not even have a cabinet, though he could have used his abilities to create one without much trouble.

‘Good morning, Sakura!’, Hashirama exclaimed. ‘Because of both you and Kakashi, I have been in great spirits since waking up.’

‘I am glad, Lord Hashirama’, she smiled politely. ‘I assume you have no... alcohol-related discomfort?’

‘I do not have a hangover, no’, he laughed out loud. ‘Say, Sakura, how about you finally stop calling me Lord? Enough with the formal approach. We are comrades.’

‘I would be honoured to do so’, she has not yet managed to abandon formal speech patterns, but it was good enough for Senju. ‘I would have liked to talk longer, but Kakashi is waiting for me. We will be back soon.’

‘Just be sure not to miss our departure!’, the man reminded her. ‘I cannot imagine signing the treaty without you around.’

‘It will only take a short while, no need to worry’, she answered and hesitated for a moment before speaking again. ‘See you, Hashirama!’

The wide smile on the man's face told her that she had done nothing improper, so she breathed a sigh of relief as she left. Hatake was leaning against the wall and holding his things under his arm. 

‘Sorry to keep you waiting’, she said. ‘I just wanted to check if Lord Hashirama was alright.’

‘I told you to drop the Lord part!’, a shout came from behind the door and they both smiled. 

Then suddenly Tobirama's dishevelled locks of hair emerged from behind the paper door. The grumpy man sent them a stern glance with his red eyes.

‘Keep your voices down’, he said blurrily, presumably having just been snapped out of his sleep. ‘Where are you going?’

‘To take a bath in the river’, replied Sakura, unable to hide her amusement. ‘Come along, you could use one too.’

‘What do you find so entertaining?’, he asked in a hoarse voice. 

‘You’, she admitted bluntly, to Kakashi's surprise. ‘I have always assumed that you were more of a morning person.’

In response, the man merely humphed and returned to the bedroom before Haruno had time to ask if he would accept the offer of a bath. She had no intention of going inside so as not to irritate him more, but a few seconds later he emerged from the room with a set of clean clothes and, without waiting for them, left the building. Kakashi bit his lip to keep from laughing over the situation and together with the woman followed him. 

‘Are you feeling well?’, after a few minutes of silent walking, Sakura decided to ask a question. ‘I think I managed to get rid of your headache.’

‘Only for my brother to give me another one with his yelling’, for some reason, his grumpiness amused the woman greatly. ‘I suppose I should thank you for your help despite that.’

‘No, no, I was not trying to coerce you into saying thank you!’, she started waving her hands because of the misunderstanding. ‘I wanted to know if you needed any more help. It is I who should be thanking you for not talking nonsense like Kakashi.’

‘What kind of nonsense?’, he inquired, his eyes narrowing. 

‘Oh, nothing major’, she said. ’He is just sort of dramatic. Aren't you, Kakashi?’

‘I beg your pardon, Sakura’, the offended man spoke. ‘Quoting the unparalleled master's works is not being dramatic. Not my fault you're a prude with no literary taste.’

Tobirama felt his eyelid twitch. He was unsure if it was a matter of being annoyed by the conversation itself or its subject matter. He wanted to know what Hatake had said that Sakura's disapproval had prompted him to call her a prude. It was definitely something inappropriate. Right now there were more pressing matters to discuss than improper, distasteful literature. He involuntarily quickened his step a little.

‘Great, you have pissed off Lord Tobirama’, when he heard Kakashi's whisper, he stopped immediately and turned to face him.

‘From my understanding, it was you who made Haruno uncomfortable, thus you are the subject of my disapproval’, his hoarse voice gave a menacing tone to his speech. ‘I am glad to accompany you, as I will be able to keep an eye on you, Hatake. I have no tolerance for perverts.’

Not to make matters worse, Kakashi refrained from making Tobirama aware that his own student was a known pervert. Or will be.

‘It is not like that, Tobirama!’, protested Sakura to defend her friend. ‘It is merely friendly bickering.’

‘Lord Tobirama, I assure you that if she felt any real discomfort, I would remember it for a long time’, Kakashi stated. 

Tobirama acknowledged their arguments, but still eyed Hatake suspiciously before moving on. A few moments later they were at their destination. Sakura again insisted on being the first to bathe. The man stood with his back to the river, crossed his arms and, to Kakashi's astonishment, lifted one finger to create a massive wall of water obstructing any view. Nevertheless, the jōnin averted his gaze and focused on the forest they had emerged from, so as not to tempt fate. Though he had to admit, he was a little afraid that Senju would thrust a kunai into his skull. Sakura, meanwhile, snorted as she saw Tobirama's excessive caution, but she was still thankful for his protectiveness. She never liked being defended due to the assumption she was weak, but the Senju was protecting her privacy, which was a pleasant change. And she had to acknowledge he did it in a rather impressive way. She peacefully finished washing, got dressed while concealed behind a wall of water and came out of hiding.

‘You have my thanks, Tobirama’, she said with amazement. ‘Did you really do it with a single raised finger? This is remarkable.’

Although he was well aware of his masterful skills, Sakura's admiration gave him inexplicable pleasure anyway. He nodded and dismissed the wall of water just to demonstrate to her that he indeed only required one finger. Her wide eyes were a disproportionately valuable reward for that minimal effort. After this brief display, he gestured for her to turn around. As a precaution, the woman moved a little further away and sat down on the ground with her back to the water. The two men, meanwhile, undressed and stepped into the cold water. Tobirama could not help but cast another stealthy suspicious glance at Hatake. He noted that he had not even tried to look in Sakura's direction. That might as well have been the result of his threat, so it hardly lessened his suspicion, but it did ease his anger a little. 

Haruno, meanwhile, continued to think about how Senju was able to manipulate water in such a way. After all, he supposedly had no perfect chakra control, and something so impressive required it. Maybe he unconsciously only controlled water chakra with such precision? She decided to try to do it herself but refused to let anyone see her pathetic attempts. Distracted by her thoughts, she forgot why she was actually sitting with her back to the river and turned around for a second to see if she was being watched. She realized her mistake when she saw Tobirama's muscular back and the red tattoos covering his skin. She immediately turned around and hid her face in her hands. Then she breathed deeply a few times and forced herself to make a neutral expression. Sakura was a medic and understood that physical attraction was not something dependent on will, yet she still felt like a pervert bigger than Kakashi. Latissimus dorsi muscle. A mere tissue. Highly prominent and trained to perfection, but still nothing more than a tissue. Sakura reiterated the functions of this muscle in her head and brought herself back to balance. Perfectly in time, as the two men had just finished putting on their clothes. 

‘It is essential that we make haste’, announced Tobirama, blissfully unaware of Haruno’s barely gone inner struggle. ‘In a few hours, my brother will be signing a peace treaty with the Uchiha.’

The way back passed much faster as they ran instead of walking. Leaping over branches cut the journey time by two thirds. In the camp, preparations were underway for the monumental event. Suddenly someone grabbed Sakura's forearm and Tobirama could already feel the rage building up, but he understood what was happening. The person who had stopped Haruno was one of the seamstresses.

‘What is your colour preference, Haruno-san?’, she asked. 

‘Red’, she answered with no hesitation, and Tobirama for some reason liked that response. ‘Why?’

‘Excuse my bold behaviour, Haruno-san, but you never tried on any of the formal attire’, said the older woman. ‘Fortunately, we have some red ones to choose from and they should fit. I assume you are unmarried, therefore-’

‘Oh, please forgive me’, Sakura was horrified by the sudden realisation. ‘It is not necessary for me to wear anything formal. If I need to act as a medic I will be more comfortable in armour.’

‘But that would be inappropriate!’, the seamstress protested. 

‘Haruno shall wear her armour’, Tobirama announced in an unobjectionable voice, and then added a crucial part. ‘If she so desires.’

Sakura was somewhat shocked. She would not have thought that the man would respect the fact she valued her independence and freedom of choice. A few months earlier he had been willing to direct her behaviour, and now he was allowing her to be non-traditional because she felt better that way. She appreciated Senju more and more every day. As she smiled radiantly at him, he felt as if his heart was melting. For a moment he seemed to stop hearing what was going on around him. What he did was something that sounded unimaginable. He returned the smile as best he could. He realised what he had done when Sakura almost let go of her things and regained her composure at the last second. And he thanked fate that no one else was looking at him. Everyone was busy with preparations. Hatake had already entered the building to speak to Hashirama, and the seamstress thankfully turned around, having been called out to by one of her fellow workers. 

‘You look less threatening when you smile’, she managed to say. 

‘One should not appear soft on the battlefield’, the atmosphere seemed to have returned to normal. ‘Come, we must get ready.’

They entered Tobirama's quarters. Sakura put on the armour without too much trouble. She still remembered, however, that it had taken her a month before the time travel to work out all the fastenings and fixings. By the time she was done, Tobirama was perfectly ready and looking out the window. After all, he had put on this armour so often that he would be able to do it in his sleep.

‘Do you truly think there will be a need for medical intervention or were you simply looking for an excuse not to wear formal attire?’, Senju asked half-jokingly.

‘There is nothing we can be sure of’, she replied. ‘I expect no aggression from Lord Madara, but I fear protest from his or your clansmen.’

Tobirama tilted his head slightly and crossed his arms.

‘Yes, the formal attire also was a factor in making my decision’, she admitted finally. ‘Besides, I suppose I would not stand the shame if anyone soiled your precious fabrics with blood.’

‘It would not be the first time’, he replied grimly. ‘May I ask you a question?’

‘By all means’, she looked at him curiously.

‘Do you believe it would have been preferable if I had been the one to die in the fight with Izuna?’, such a question she did not expect. ‘Should I have let myself be killed to end the war?’

‘Izuna was in no way innocent. Both of you were willing to kill and you merely proved to be the superior warrior', she hesitated. 

‘It is quite ironic how the cruellest thing I have done has transpired after my death’, he said in a calm tone, without looking away from the window. ‘I indirectly took away the life you were leading.’

‘The life I led without my own identity?’, her answer surprised him. ‘Third member of Kakashi's team. A disciple of the Hokage. A medic at the level of the Fifth. A wielder of Tsunade's strength. At last, I may be able to do something as Sakura Haruno.’

‘You have accomplished plenty as Sakura Haruno and there is still more to come’, now it was her turn to be taken aback. ‘I look forward to witnessing that.’

‘Is this your way of saying you are glad to have me here?’, she teased him in a friendly manner.

‘I take no joy in your presence when you are throwing trees at me’, he did not deny her words. ‘Technically it was no longer taijutsu.’

‘Could it be that the great Tobirama Senju is afraid of some tiny little tree?’, she cocked an eyebrow.

‘I feared the person who plucked it from the ground as if it were a mere sapling’, the man snorted. ‘You are a formidable opponent, Sakura.’

The praise from the legendary ninja was something that made Sakura instantaneously proud. Reflexively, she wanted to bow - after all, years of diplomatic training were not something to be forgotten just like that - but she merely smiled. However, she had no chance to reply.

‘How long do you think one can wait for you?’, complained Hashirama after barging to their room. ‘You are ready, that is well. We are heading out.’

Tobirama blinked. Usually, he was the one who had to drag his brother out for any scheduled training sessions. But now the head of the clan was overjoyed that peace was coming and he made sure everything was taken care of. He would not allow himself to be even a second late at this moment. It was clear he missed his friend and was excited at the prospect of mending their relationship. One person from each branch of the clan was to accompany them on their journey, which still made an impressive number of thirty people. Only the ninjas were chosen so they could move faster. Hashirama and Tobirama ran at the front, followed by Sakura and Kakashi at the end. The general reluctantly agreed to let outsiders protect the delegation.

‘It is all unbelievable, Kakashi’, she whispered but was still careful not to say too much. ‘At long last, peace between Uchiha and Senju.’

‘Who knows what could have happened if Lord Hashirama had not decided to take this step?’, he answered her in a similar manner. ‘The sky is clear, but the air is heavy. I fear there may be a thunderstorm.’

_ The general may have planned something to disrupt the signing of the peace treaty. _

‘May you be wrong’, she replied. ‘Rain could spoil all the arrangements.’

_ If Takahiro were to rebel, the Uchiha might reject the peace proposal at the last minute. _


	26. poison, blood and tea (in this order)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW: drugs?/poison

When the Senju delegation arrived, it was still before time, but the Uchiha had already begun to gather by the river. The gentle smile on Madara's face was an unforgettable sight. Without his armour, his athletic physique worthy of a legendary warrior was visible. The crowd of Uchiha behind him indicated that their criteria for selecting delegation members were less restrictive. Several people from both sides had set up racks on which fabrics with the symbols of both clans were hung. The black and red fan on a cobalt blue background and the Senju emblem on a plum cloth stood together. Members of both clans lined up in a semicircle to get a good view of their leaders. Sakura and Kakashi stood slightly back so as not to ruin a significant moment. Tobirama cast an ambiguous glance at the two but stayed among the Senju instead of approaching them. The ceremony that followed was breathtakingly beautiful and touching. Even the faces of those unsure about this alliance softened. As the two leaders shook hands, Sakura felt tears gather under her eyelids. Madara truly was a man as kind as Hashirama. Tobirama and Izuna stepped forward from the crowd to assist their brothers in signing the peace treaty. A gasp suddenly came from the Uchiha's side. The crowd immediately parted, and Sakura cursed in her mind as she saw a man with a kunai stuck in his back. Her kunai. 

‘What is the meaning of this?’, Madara asked with a frown.

Suddenly the general stepped out of line and pointed an accusing finger in Sakura's direction.

‘Murderess!’, he yelled. ‘This is why this wench talked Lord Hashirama into an alliance - so that we would lose our guard!’

‘Hashirama, is it true?’, there was uncertainty in Madara's voice. ‘Did you not do it of your own free will?’

‘It was entirely my decision. You do know nobody would be able to force my hand’, he assured and Uchiha seemed to believe him. ‘General Takahiro, do you have any evidence of her betrayal?’

‘Anija, surely you are not thinking-’, Tobirama began, but his brother's raised hand silenced him.

‘Her poisoned blade killed this man’, Takahiro said curtly. ‘That is proof enough.’

‘This is no proof at all!’, Tobirama thundered. ‘You-’

‘Takahiro, you treacherous little bastard!’, Sakura finally snapped, her voice trembling with anger. ‘Everybody back off. I will save this man. He is not dead yet, just passed out from the pain.’

The poison that her kunais were coated with worked quickly. She knew its effects perfectly well - after all, she had created the antidote herself. Even Tobirama recognized the distinctive convulsions and darkening wound he had seen when Sakura tore off the man's robes. It was the same substance that had nearly killed Sasuke. Meanwhile, on Hashirama's orders, several Senju incapacitated the general. 

‘You four’, she pointed her finger at a group of young men. ’You must hold him as firmly as you can.’

Tobirama knew he was not supposed to interfere, but he was just about to forcefully pull her away from her patient when she rolled up her sleeve, took the poisoned blade and sliced her forearm along the veins. The skin around the cut darkened, but the antidote had been circulating steadily through her body since she had inserted it there, so after only a moment the damage stopped. With surgical precision, she isolated the antidote particles with her chakra and inserted them into the man's wound. She then used her healthy hand to heal the damaged tissue. Senju was no longer able to watch this and knelt by her side to stop her bleeding. He was aware that she simply refused to put her health before her patients' life, but for some reason, the sight of her lacerated arm triggered his protective instincts. He tore off his own sleeve to stop the gushing blood. Had he been anyone else, Haruno would have already squashed him into the ground, but she found herself unable to do so and allowed him to tend to the wound. She breathed a sigh of relief when the man began to move after restoring all the destroyed tissue. Then she smiled at Tobirama and healed her wound, but tied his torn sleeve to his armour. Only when she stood up did everyone seem to recover from their shock.

‘Lord Madara’, she knelt before the man and bowed her head. ‘It is indeed true the weapon belonged to me, but I was not the one using it. Please forgive me for not guarding it properly.’

‘First, you saved me’, he said and Izuna winced. ‘And now one of my clansmen. You are deserving of gratitude, not forgiveness.’

‘Thank you, Lord Madara’, she spoke and stood up when he put his hand on her shoulder.

All attention turned to Hashirama, who approached the general lying on the ground and looked at him with disappointment evident in his eyes.

‘General Takahiro, was it one of your men who attacked a member of the Uchiha clan?’, Hashirama's voice was unusually rough. ‘Did you want to squander our efforts and blame Sakura Haruno for something she never did?’

‘I refuse to accept your naïve ideology of peace’, the general spat on the ground, still pressed against it by his clansmen. ‘Once again, you will tell me to think this through, correct?’

‘No. That very night I granted you your last chance, general’, there was sadness in Hashirama's words. ‘Your punishment will be death in a duel with me.’

Few expected such ruthlessness from him.

‘My Lord, I want to fight him’, Sakura knew she was acting inappropriately but ran up to the leader anyway. ‘It would be only fair.’

‘Fighting a woman who pretends to be a warrior?’, he snorted with disgust. ‘My honour will not allow it.’

‘Amusing. This sounds as if you ever had it, general’, all those gathered looked in shock at Tobirama, who said these words. ‘If you survive the fight with Haruno, you will be exiled, but we will spare your life.’

‘Only if Sakura vows not to hold back’, the head of the clan made his demand. 

‘What form of combat do you prefer, general?’, she asked.

‘Taijutsu’, his answer came as no surprise, but Tobirama and Kakashi felt some pity for the man. ‘No chakra. You can use weapons, but no poison.’

‘I need no chakra, general’, she grinned and Tobirama began to have second thoughts about his opinion on smiling on the battlefield.

The crowd parted. Madara took his place next to Hashirama, curiously anticipating Sakura's display of skill. From what he had observed, Tobirama was fond of her and would not have allowed the fight if he was not sure of her victory. Meanwhile, he not only agreed to the duel but also suggested it would end in the death of one of the participants. Tobirama smiled slightly as he saw Sakura remove her armour. He had learned well enough that she fared much better in hand-to-hand combat without it.

‘Are you mocking me, woman?’, the general said the last word with disgust. 

‘If I truly mocked you, I would leave my armour on’, she replied. 

‘Begin!’, exclaimed Hashirama.

The burly general moved towards her with his fist aimed at her face. She gracefully dodged the blow. Seeing the curiosity of those gathered, she felt a bit of vanity and decided to give them a longer demonstration instead of ending the fight in one move. The general was a perfect example of someone who was only concerned with the theoretical side of his job. He sent others to the battlefield without knowing anything about it himself. At the same time, his title gave him confidence. Therefore, he felt anger when the woman effortlessly dodged his punch. She was much swifter than him, but was she stronger? He sincerely doubted it. One of his men said he had seen her carrying her belongings without any assistance, but that was no indication of anything. He moved towards her once more and delivered several quick blows. She managed to evade each of them and blocked the last one. With one hand.

She had grown bored with dodging so she used the moment of surprise to grab his forearm and throw him to the ground. Though she had used no chakra, a crater formed anyway. Tobirama felt a strange excitement when he saw how the muscles of her arm tensed as she threw the towering man. Takahiro crawled out of the hole with his cheeks burning with embarrassment.

‘You use chakra, you lying bitch’, he hissed.

‘No, but I can do so if you wish’, her polite smile deepened his rage.

‘You are using some kind of trickery’, he insisted. ‘Is it a genjutsu? Why cannot I break it?’

‘I only use my muscle power’, her words did not convince him and he tried again to break the illusion to no avail.

‘You are a goddamned woman, your-’, the general began to speak, whilst an irritated Sakura ripped off her sleeve and flexed her muscles, rendering the man speechless.

Previously Tobirama had been merely excited. But now he felt his heartbeat quicken and his cheeks heat up. He was thankful for the invention of facial armour that partially hid the blush. He wondered if by any chance her muscles were more toned than his. Some would probably say Sakura was not feminine due to her physique. Tobirama disagreed. For him, she was simply not a fragile woman. All thoughts of that sort immediately fled from his mind when he noticed the expression on Izuna's face out of the corner of his eye. If he was holding something in his hand at the moment, he would probably crush it in a split second, that was how hard his fist clenched. The man's eyes were wide open and he made no attempt to even hide his admiration. Senju knew the Uchiha women had been no match for Sakura, but he still felt offended by Izuna looking at her. He bit the inside of his cheek to refrain from a comment he would regret and went back to watching the fight. Not much had changed, only the general was much more cautious. He pulled out a kunai, so Sakura released the earth seal and touched the tool with one finger, turning it to dust. Tobirama smirked, seeing that Takahiro regretted the accusation of using chakra against the arrangements. 

Haruno was not going to show all her skills. She had already demonstrated her medical abilities, strength and experimental seal. In fact, she was ready to deliver the final blow, and Takahiro apparently sensed it, because he began to mould his chakra. Sakura jumped towards him the moment he created five walls of earth. He was pleased with his timing but realized something was wrong when he heard the gasps of the audience. It turned out that the woman had pierced all five layers with one chakra-enhanced finger and was aiming for his chest. He was merely a tactician, not that familiar with the battlefield. His skills were enough to defend himself just enough to make it before his men arrived to save him. Hence, he did not manage to dodge. When the dust raised by the falling walls settled, Sakura crossed the man's arms over his chest and closed his eyes with a touch of her fingers. Not a drop of blood and the general was dead. The leaders and their brothers landed next to her.

‘Thank you for taking this burden off my shoulders. Justice dutifully administered, Sakura’, admitted Hashirama, looking down at the lifeless body. ‘Just how did you do it?’

‘Commotio cordis’, she explained. ‘Disruption of the heart rhythm at the right moment of the one-second cycle results in death. When you additionally apply chakra, the opponent is beyond saving.’

‘You brought glory to the Senju without even being part of their clan’, Madara's deep voice frightened her a little at first. ‘I hope that once a joint settlement is established, you will train with my clansmen.’

‘That was extraordinary, Sakura-san!’, Izuna was thrilled but this time he looked cautiously at visibly agitated Tobirama and did not reach out to the woman.

‘It is worth noting that Sakura is as extraordinary as her abilities’, the younger Senju could no longer stand listening to others compliment her. 

Sakura blinked a few times, not believing all those words. Particularly from Tobirama, she would not have expected him to praise her in front of people other than Hatake. Having thanked everyone politely for their kind words, she ran over to the younger Senju, who had already turned and started walking away.

‘Thank you for saying that’, he tried not to look at her once he noticed she was smiling, but he was unable to resist and glanced at her.

‘I meant it’, he said simply and felt the corners of his mouth lift slightly. ‘You could have finished it in seconds, though.’

‘Hey, at least I had an opportunity to show off my muscles’, she snorted and to Tobirama's horror, she flexed her arm again. ‘Not very girly, huh?’

_Ah, shit._

He had to look away to keep the blush off his face. His body acted ridiculously.

‘No, I…’, he felt like dying of shame when he could not find the right words. ‘Weakness is not a manifestation of femininity. Nothing wrong with your muscles putting most men to shame.’

‘Well, they certainly do not put you to shame’, she said without thinking and cursed in her mind. 

Tobirama raised one eyebrow.

‘At least, that is what I think. You wear rather form-fitting clothes’, she started babbling, trying to get out of an awkward situation. ‘It is not difficult to imagine what is underneath. Oh, that sounded wrong. Holy shit. Excuse me.’

‘You are extraordinary in more ways than one’, Tobirama tried not to lose his composure, knowing that his clansmen were nearby. ‘For the sake of a complete experience, you should have punched me at the very end.’

‘I apologize, for so long I have tried to tame my temper, but for some reason, I just cannot’, she confessed. 

‘Do not do it, then’, he stated plainly. ‘Fiery Sakura is quite likeable when she is not throwing trees as if they were blades of grass.’

He left her stunned and went to talk to his clansmen. She shook her head and began to put her armour back on. Kakashi appeared next to her and tilted his head.

‘What?’, she asked, when he did not stop looking at her with analytical eyes.

‘Oh, nothing’, he replied dismissively. ‘I just wonder where Sakura, who bowed to everyone, has gone and who is that woman who flexed her muscles in front of Tobirama Senju.’

‘And what's so strange about that?’, she inquired. 

‘Not a thing’, Kakashi patted her head. ‘You really should've borrowed my books, though. Now you're on your own because I am not risking bringing Lord Tobirama's wrath upon myself.’

This day was getting weirder and weirder. Sakura frowned and finished putting on her armour as Hatake had already left. Of course, it was not lost on Senju's attention that the expression on her face after talking to the jōnin was a bit strange. However, he saw nothing alarming, and the man had left alive, so he certainly had not acted inappropriately. He noticed that his brother was about to end the conversation with Madara, so he returned to them.

‘Tobirama, I was just about to look for you’, Hashirama spoke. ‘Could you take care of the camp for a few days? I will send a messenger to let you know when you can lead the Senju to the new settlement.’

‘Will you have enough chakra to get it done in a few days?’, the younger Senju knew the answer, as he had asked the same question the first time, but he had to keep up appearances. ‘Even your chakra reserves are not unlimited.’

‘That is why Madara will be with me and perform the chakra transfer if necessary!’, the man explained without hesitation. ‘Make sure Sakura gets some rest.’

‘Sakura can look after herself’, Tobirama replied grumpily. ‘Permission to return?’

‘Granted’, Hashirama said. 

The man nodded and went to pass on the information to his clansmen. Kakashi meanwhile finished helping Uchiha and Senju clean up the place of the newly formed alliance. The documents were handed over to Madara who was the future leader of the village. Sakura checked one more time to make sure her patient was feeling well before agreeing to leave. Kakashi for some reason insisted she should support Tobirama at the front while he would protect the back. She understood his logical explanation - the Uchiha had gone in the opposite direction and would most definitely run into potential enemies coming from there. There was a greater chance that someone would attack from the front. Senju also accepted this justification.

‘Would you care for some tea when we return?’, Tobirama asked this question before they started running. ‘My brother has quite a stockpile that he refuses to share with me.’

‘Do you expect me to rob Hashirama of his tea which he did not tell me about?’, she asked with exaggerated outrage and Tobirama almost fell for it. ‘I would be delighted.’


	27. not sure if this is friendly behaviour

Tobirama was considered a painfully logical and somewhat stoic man, but those who knew him better knew he was far from unemotional. He could fly into a rage and make sarcastic comments about reality. Upon returning to camp, Sakura learned that on top of all this, he was also insanely petty and vengeful. She could hardly believe her eyes as she watched him empty Hashirama's stash of treasured tea with a smug grin. Truth be told, she thought his suggestion was a joke until the very end. However, she was now indulging in the delicious tea; Tobirama had made sure the water temperature was just right. They sat on the floor of Senju's bedroom, and Sakura curiously glanced at the moss samples he had collected.

‘Sphagnum', she announced immediately. ‘It has antibacterial and antifungal properties, which makes it of great use in field conditions as a wound dressing’  
‘My deepest gratitude to you for spoiling my enjoyment’, Tobirama said and humphed.   
‘Forgive me’, she did not sound at all sorry. ’As a medic and poison specialist, I need to have some knowledge of plants. But I believe you will find other practical applications.’  
‘I will describe this species under a slightly different name just to spite you’, he smirked.  
‘Leave the botanical discoveries to someone else’, she scolded him. ‘You cannot simply get ahead of future researchers.’  
‘It was a joke’, Tobirama replied and sighed heavily as he saw her raised eyebrows. ‘Albeit a poor one.’

The man had to admit he felt quite at ease with her. He had become accustomed to her constant presence, and although he had not even dared to formulate such a thought explicitly, he could not imagine a day without her company. Especially now that she had decided to follow his suggestion and no longer suppress her genuine self. There was no dramatic change, but he could see her shoulders were less tense and she slouched a little when sitting.

‘How do you feel about killing the general?’, the sudden change of subject, though somewhat morbid, amused Sakura.  
‘Subtlety doesn't sit well with you, does it?’, she shook her head with a slight smile. ‘Killing is never easy, particularly when the opponent is weak. But had he stayed alive, he could have endangered the peace.’  
‘This approach sounds all too familiar’, he poured more tea both for her and himself.  
‘Well, I guess we are more alike than we would have liked’, she raised the cup to her lips. ‘Perhaps my motives were more selfish than correcting the mistakes of previous leaders.’  
‘Do you regret creating this jutsu, then?’, his question was simple, but he suspected she would find it challenging to answer.

She thought about what she had experienced so far. The training and praise of legendary shinobi. Her first accomplishments on the road to a brighter future. But also the confusing sensations. The lack of trust from the Senju clan. The deaths she prevented and the one she caused. A somehow simpler life. No Akatsuki, no dead friends, no village crushed by war. No village at all.

‘I suppose it's still too early for me to state my opinion’, she said at last, and Tobirama nodded in acknowledgement. ‘And what do you think?’  
‘So far you have not done anything harmful’, he replied. ‘This is not enough to come to a final judgement, but you are on the right track.’  
‘We are on the right track’, she corrected him. ‘Had it not been for you, I probably would not have been able to create this technique so quickly. And do not forget about Kakashi. Together with your brother, he developed an improved spatial arrangement plan. And this is just one example. You could take more interest in his contribution.’  
‘I am talking to you, not to Hatake’, he retorted with a faint air of annoyance. ‘Besides, you objectively put the highest effort into this whole plan.’  
‘You are mistaken’, the woman was stubborn and Tobirama became increasingly irritated. ‘It is true the idea was mine and I created the seal, but even for that, I needed your help. The greatest input-’  
‘Damn it, Sakura, start appreciating your work!’, he grabbed her by the shoulders, spilling her tea in the process. 

Warm hands on her forearms. Crimson eyes dangerously close to hers. This was territory she had planned not to enter. She had to be professional and level-headed. Just why did the damn Senju make it so difficult? Haruno was beginning to wonder if there was any point in being so defensive about these strange feelings. Did she even want to? All that confusion was too much. Sakura did what came easiest to her - she became angry.

‘What matters is that I have completed the work’, she snapped and pushed him away. ‘It is not your business whether I appreciate it.’  
‘Why are you only proud of what someone else has taught you?’, Tobirama refused to let this issue go. ‘As far as I know, you have not even named any of your techniques. Since you want to be remembered as Sakura Haruno, why are you doing everything to prevent that?’  
‘I never said I wanted to be remembered’, she remarked. ‘I merely want to live my life true to myself. What happens later to the memory of me I no longer care about.’  
‘But I do care about that’, he argued. ‘You cannot be known as someone who has taken it upon themselves to fix the shinobi world. Therefore, you deserve the recognition of your other achievements.’  
‘Oh, for fuck's sake, why do you care so much?’, she no longer worried about unladylike language.  
‘Because I care about you-’, Tobirama replied without thinking and felt like recreating their jutsu just to undo the moment. ‘Your reputation. Technically, you are now part of the clan. Senjus must appear powerful and every asset of ours is vital.’

Good save, he thought.

‘You have never presented it in such a way’, she frowned and for a second the man thought she had seen through his explanation. ‘Well, I suppose you have a point here. But is it not enough that I have demonstrated medical skills and parts of my fighting style?’  
‘Unless you scare men away with your power, someone will inevitably send a marriage proposal’, said, knowing that her pride would not allow an arranged union. ‘A refusal would be considered an insult. In the worst-case scenario, it would jeopardise our work. Harsh, but that is the truth.’  
‘Are men so touchy these days?’, she smirked. ‘Mere physical strength can discourage them so much?’  
‘Most of them, yes. I assume that among those interested in you would be shinobi rather than civilians’, he replied cautiously, cursing his carelessness. ‘Should you refuse them, I believe they would accept my authority since you are under our protection. And my brother's.’  
‘I am glad you are taking my thoughts on marriage into consideration. Well, maybe it's a good thing you spied on me and eavesdropped while I was talking to…’, she abruptly stopped speaking and shut her eyes.  
‘Sakura?’, he approached her with concern, seeing that tears were running from under her eyelids. ‘Sakura, please do not cry.’

His words did not have the intended effect. The woman hid her face in her hands. Tobirama frowned, not quite sure what to do. Ultimately, he hugged her. This was the second time he had done it, but still, his body was rather stiff during it. He awkwardly caressed her back. Though he wondered if the kunoichi would push him away, she pulled closer instead. Senju felt her shaking breath begin to steady itself. He figured the subject of Sasuke was hard for her, so he refrained from asking questions. When she calmed down, she stepped back and looked into his eyes, and Tobirama felt his heartbeat quicken as he saw the glossy green. Looking away, he realised that the spilt tea had already soaked into the floor.

‘Sorry about the tea’, he said dumbly.  
‘Sorry for getting your clothes wet’, she replied with a slight smile, wiping away the remains of her tears. ‘Thank you for the hug. I needed it.’  
‘Anytime you like’, his mouth again outpaced his mind. 

Sakura hugged him once more, effectively causing him to shut up. He had to admit it was rather pleasant, sitting on the bedroom floor with her and feeling the warmth of her body. This time he was a bit bolder and stroked her pink hair. He noted how soft it was. A sort of strange peace came over him. Tobirama relaxed a little, but when Sakura reached her hand up to touch his hair as well, he got a little wary.

‘Sorry, it looked too fluffy for me to resist touching it’, she said in embarrassment and withdrew her hand.  
‘I reacted reflexively’, he assured her, suddenly craving that contact. ‘Go ahead.’

When she stroked his hair, it felt as if he had entered another world. He had no idea something so simple could be so enjoyable. The corners of the woman's mouth lifted as he leaned into her touch and closed his eyes. This type of physical contact did not bother her because she controlled it. Tobirama regrettably was unable to indulge in this sensation for long, as his sleep deprivation became apparent. A moment of relaxation meant that his body would immediately recognise this as a signal to fall asleep. Sakura was not prepared for the much heavier man than her to fall asleep cuddled up to her after a few minutes. She could easily lift his weight, but it was challenging without waking him up. He seemed so peaceful that Sakura had no heart to disturb his sleep. She sighed heavily and leaned down to pull the sleeping mat to her. It was not as if she had never slept near a man. After all, she was with three of them in a team. She was also quite tired herself, so she carefully laid down on the mat, and the man clinging to her had not even noticed the change in position. She briefly thought Tobirama was a very catlike person before she fell asleep.

Kakashi took a peek into the room, troubled by the few hours of silence and promptly backed away to laugh safely. The chemistry between his friend and the legendary shinobi was evident from the very beginning of their familiarity. At times it looked as if they wanted to jump at each other's throats, but over time they grew fond of each other. It was none of his business, however, he did want Sakura to be content. He believed that she deserved better. Being a kunoichi and a medic fulfilled her, but it was clear she needed something nicer in her life. Well, Kakashi had not expected that something nicer would be the Second Hokage, but who was he to judge? Besides, he had a more important task. Hashirama had entrusted him with the duties of general and he had already managed to win the trust of the Senju much quicker than Sakura. He decided to teach them a few tricks, but he wanted to check with Tobirama first. Since he was asleep, however, he figured it would do no harm to try on his own. As it turned out, it actually could do harm to teach young, impetuous people advanced taijutsu techniques. A moment's inattention, one cocky boy and two broken limbs. Kakashi sighed heavily and quickly returned to Senju's quarters.

‘Sakura!’, he yelled but got no answer. ‘Sakura, I have an injured man!’  
‘Where?’, her dishevelled hair immediately emerged from behind the paper door. ‘Lead the way.’

Tobirama was virtually always cranky when he woke up, but this time exceptionally not. However, he found himself unable to appreciate the pleasant rest when Sakura ran out of the bedroom. He instantly followed them out and saw that Sakura was healing bone fractures perfectly despite being woken up half a minute before. At that moment he made up his mind about something.

‘What has happened here?’, Tobirama asked, trying to get a hold of the situation.  
‘I attempted to teach them the so-called Dynamic Entry and forbade them to block it with their hands, which of course this man immediately did’, Kakashi explained and shook his head. ‘Shin, was it?’  
‘I apologise, sensei’, the healed young man bowed his head in shame. ‘I just wanted to see if you were right.’  
‘Kakashi is an excellent fighter and I advise you to listen to his guidance if you do not want to end up in my care every day’, announced Sakura, finishing the damage check. ‘If another fool requires treatment because he disobeyed Hatake, I will not be gentle.’

She turned around to head back to the quarters, but Tobirama gave her a look that she correctly interpreted as a request to stay in place. He walked quickly around the camp, checking that everything was in order. After that, he returned to the woman.

‘I would like to show you something outside the camp if you have no objection to it’, he announced, and Sakura had a feeling that the faintest hint of uncertainty had appeared on his face.  
‘Gladly’, she replied, although she did not know what exactly he was talking about.  
‘I will be back in a moment, wait here’, he instructed. ‘I will use Flying Raijin outside the gate, so you will have to grab me as hard as you can.’  
‘Understood’, she said. 

Sakura disliked surprises, but she knew there was no point in extracting information from Tobirama. She figured she would find out in her own time. Minutes later the man returned from the main Senju compound with a pouch of unknown contents. They walked out of the camp together, and Haruno embraced him tightly. Senju pulled out a kunai and for safety's sake grabbed her as well. In a split second, they were in a different place, and Sakura felt like a Rasengan had just hit her lungs. She caught her breath after a moment and looked around. They were on top of a mountain. The view was stunning and she decided it was a fitting reward for the discomfort experienced during the journey. The sun was already setting, so a warm amber light shone on their faces. They sat down on one of the rocks.

‘Breathtaking’, she whispered.  
‘This place is of great significance to me’, Tobirama confessed. ‘May I... say something personal?’  
‘Of course’, Sakura said. ‘I am always willing to learn something about you.’  
‘My father was a strict man. On more than one occasion, he beat us when we did not perform at the level he considered satisfactory in training’, he started to speak and looked to the ground. ‘I had no real childhood. War, loss, suffering. On top of that, my father humiliated us. I needed some kind of escape, someplace just for me. Not even Hashirama knows that sometimes I still disappear to sit here. If my memories bear no lies, he never found out about it. You are the only person I have told about this.‘  
‘I am honoured’, amazement was clear in her voice. ‘Truly. Thank you, Tobirama.’  
‘There is one more thing’, she looked into his eyes, and her surprise intensified. ‘I want to teach you the Flying Thunder God technique.’  
‘I-I…’, Sakura stuttered. ‘Are you certain?’

Instead of answering, Tobirama simply unfastened the pouch and handed it to her. Sakura pulled one kunai from inside and examined it from all sides. It was the first time she had ever had the opportunity to see his weapon up close. The blade was clean and unchipped, and the seal paper was new. The kunoichi gasped when she realised that cherry blossoms had been carved into the blade. A cliché reference to her name, but for some reason, she was delighted by Senju's gesture. Tobirama must have prepared it specifically for her. She put the kunai back in the pouch and for a moment the man felt a stab in his heart, thinking Sakura would refuse, but she just hugged him once again that day. 

‘This is... I... I do not know what to say. I am so thrilled. Thank you’, she began to babble without interrupting the embrace. ‘This is incredible. You are incredible. Thank you once again.’  
‘The technique is not complicated, so perhaps you can transport us to the camp before nightfall’, he smirked, seeing her wide-open eyes. ‘You have superior chakra control, so if you can increase its range, you will be able to sense where the tags are. I recall you can scan your surroundings with chakra. This is not much different, just do not concentrate your chakra in one place, stretch it out instead.’

He took her hand and placed her fingers on the seal. She infused chakra into it and closed her eyes. She felt Tobirama inserting his chakra into her body to help her look for the marks. With his guidance, she managed to direct the chakra in the desired direction. From the position of the sun, she knew immediately upon arriving at the mountain that they needed to head northwest to return, so she directed her chakra there. She sensed a dozen different seals along the way. The kunoichi frowned and forced her chakra to cover a larger field. She almost lost control in her excitement as she began to sense the very slight outlines of the environment. She guessed she was close to success as Tobirama grabbed her tightly. In concentration, she selected a marker located in his quarters. Indeed the technique was not complicated, but working it out without his explanation would be difficult. She applied a layer of chakra to herself and the man, then pushed the chakra deeper into the kunai. They found themselves in the middle of the room. 

‘I had not thought that a layer of chakra could cancel out the unpleasant effects of travel’, he admitted. ‘You did well, Sakura.’  
‘Without your chakra and help I would not have made it’, she replied. ‘Damn, that took longer than I thought. We were supposed to be back before sunset, yet it is already dark. How did this happen? Did it take me too long to sense the markers?’  
‘I simply wanted to give you motivation’, a smug smile appeared on his face. ‘For a first attempt, you still did brilliantly. Now I will show you how to apply the seal.’

He handed her a kunai, instructing her to try and teach her chakra that shape. Given her skill in chakra control, Sakura had little trouble. She placed her hand on the floor and recreated the seal. Tobirama nodded as he sensed the new marking.

‘Can I put one on you?’, she asked, stunning him.   
‘Only if you allow me to do the same’, Tobirama stated after a brief moment of silence.  
‘So where can I place it?’, he did not think about the answer beforehand.  
‘Wherever you want, as long as it is not easily noticeable’, he finally said.   
‘Turn around’, she commanded. ‘The back seems a reasonable choice.’

He did as she told him, leaned over and rolled up his turtleneck. Sakura repeated to herself in her mind that it was an ordinary back. He felt her touch, a moment of pain and medical chakra.

‘It is not some great pain you have to waste chakra for’, he complained and adjusted his clothing. ‘Where do you want your seal?’  
‘I, uh’, she suddenly blushed, glad that Tobirama did not see her. ‘Well, I already have Yin seals on my back. Maybe I will put the seal on myself. As a compromise, you can choose the place.’

This time it was he who blushed.

‘Shoulder?’, he suggested the most neutral place he could think of.  
‘No symmetry’, she sighed.   
‘How about at sternum level?’, he thought that this idea did not appeal to Sakura either, since she did not answer, so he turned around. ‘Then maybe-’

But Sakura did accept his idea because she was just applying the seal to the sternum. He turned back as quickly as possible, but the sight of her physique could not leave his thoughts. Despite training her muscles to perfection, she still looked very feminine. He closed his eyes, but that image seemed to burn into his eyelids.

‘Sorry, I did not know’, he muttered, fighting the heat creeping up his cheeks.   
‘It was my fault, I could have warned you’, she replied and hastily covered herself. ‘I am done, you can turn around now.’ 

He cautiously did so and saw Sakura dressed. 

‘I must say that Flying Raijin is quite an exhausting technique when one does not have huge chakra resources’, she quickly changed the subject to divert attention from what had happened. ‘I think I need to go to sleep to restore it.’

Tobirama nodded and also went to lie down. However, he could not fall asleep - such was his affliction for years. He longed for Sakura's touch, which seemed to have a sleep-inducing effect on him. He rolled over from side to side a few times, finally started staring at the ceiling and sighed. He was already about to crawl off the mat to go back to studying the moss, but he heard Sakura's voice.

‘Stroking your hair seems to have a calming effect on you, so move closer’, she whispered. ‘There's no way I'm going to fall asleep when you're constantly making noise.’

He would like to be able to say that he reluctantly moved his mat, but it was quite the opposite. Tobirama did so immediately and felt himself smile as a gentle hand began to stroke his head. He closed his eyes and fell asleep after a few minutes, but Sakura continued playing with his hair for a while longer. In fact, she only stopped doing it because she had fallen asleep.


	28. sweet tooth

Tobirama was aware that it might take Sakura quite some time to completely master the Flying Thunder God jutsu. She only managed to use the technique because she had the support of his chakra and they both knew it. His gesture was more symbolic - he wanted to show her he considered her a significant person in his life. Gentle words and conveying emotions never came easily to him. He was more comfortable with actions. When he woke up with her hand in his hair, he felt sure his decision had been a good one. Such feelings were strange and foreign to him, but the closer he got to Sakura, the more he wanted to lose himself in them. He wondered: if he offered her a second meditation together, would his inner walls remain standing? He found himself opening up to her more and more. He told her about some of his childhood experiences, showed her the most beautiful place in this part of Senju territory and shared his technique with her. However oblivious he was, he had not missed her suggestion to place the seal on him. They were connected now and could find each other at any time. It was somehow comforting.

‘Have you slept well?’, her drowsy voice snapped him out of his musings.  
'Yes’, he replied. ‘Were I not a sensor, I would believe you put me to sleep with chakra.’  
‘Glad to hear that’, she smiled. ‘I am going to train with Kakashi. Do you want to join?’

Tobirama knew that the relationship between them was purely platonic and they had known each other longer than he knew of Haruno's existence, but he still felt some sort of envy. On the other side, it was him and not Hatake who now rested with her hand combing through his hair.

‘Yes, but I refuse to be a mere observer’, he said.  
‘So fight us both’, she suggested. ‘You are much stronger than us, but with two of us we may have a chance against you.’  
‘I find your fighting style far more engaging, but if you wish, I can face both of you’, he honestly preferred to fight only her, but he did not want to disappoint her.   
‘Are you ever going to leave this room?’, Kakashi's voice came from behind the paper door.  
‘Give us a moment to put on our armour!’, Sakura exclaimed and they both got up, getting ready to depart.

Hatake sat down on the floor as he waited for Tobirama and Sakura. After a few minutes, they emerged from the room fully armoured and with their weapons ready.

‘We decided that you and I would fight Tobirama’, she announced. ‘Do you have any objections?’  
‘I was hoping to finally have the honour of challenging Lord Tobirama’, Kakashi nodded respectfully.   
‘So everything is set’, Sakura was pleased. 

They ran to the training field. Sakura was not sure yet if she could perform Flying Raijin. Perhaps it would be the first time she could honestly beat Tobirama. This time they put off breakfast until after training. They stood on opposite sides of the field.

‘The usual?’, asked Kakashi.  
‘Yes, but I have something for the end’, kunoichi replied. ‘If I give you a sign, it means I can't make it and we'll finish in the standard way.’  
‘Understood’, he nodded.

Tobirama's eyes narrowed. He knew that they had fought by each other's side many times, so they certainly had some strategy worked out. The fact that they had spoken to each other before moving into action reinforced his belief. He created two shadow clones so he could gauge Kakashi's actual strength level. Sakura struck the ground with her chakra-enhanced fist. Tobirama correctly guessed that this was to raise the dust and allow either of them to create clones in hiding. He remembered that fact and jumped aside as Sakura's tantō almost touched his hip. His clone grabbed her by the arm and pinned her to the ground, but she turned out to be a clone as well, crumbling into dust. From under the ground, Kakashi jumped out and grabbed the blade dropped by the clone. 

‘Raiton: Shiden!’, violet lightning surrounded the tantō. 

Tobirama created a wall of water to absorb the lightning-based attack. He created another shadow clone and used Flying Raijin to hide nearby. He did not yet know that Kakashi was an excellent tracker. The Hatake clan's association with ninja dogs came with the advantage of an enhanced sense of smell. The problem was that Tobirama's scent was mixed with Sakura's. However, knowing that the woman was closer to him, he could smell his opponent. Senju had not expected to be found so quickly and was somewhat surprised to see Sakura's murderous fist and Kakashi's purple lightning bolt flying towards him from both sides. With a lift of his finger, he created two walls of water that stopped them and jumped back. A clone of Hatake was waiting for him. Tobirama already knew about his chakra element, so he opted for a ranged attack to avoid being electrocuted. The water senbon destroyed the doppelganger instantly. However, another clone appeared and immobilized the man's arms. Tobirama flexed his muscles and flipped the imitation over his head, then used water needles once more. He blocked the blow of the real version of Hatake coming from behind him and held his fist, but Kakashi began to perform the familiar seals with one hand. At the last moment, the Senju used a shortened sequence of seals to summon a water dragon that neutralized the fireball. 

Tobirama used Flying Raijin to reach Kakashi in a cloud of steam and hit him in the back of the head, causing the man to fall to the ground as if unconscious. However, Senju immediately saw through him and threw a kunai at him. Hatake drew Sakura's tantō in a flash and deflected the weapon flying towards him. He quickly stood up and blocked the sword that Tobirama had taken out. Tobirama was a master of cold weapons. Despite his perfect physical form, Kakashi was unable to dodge all the attacks and finally hissed in pain when the blade hit his thigh. Sakura, meanwhile, waited for the right moment and decided that it was right now. She closed her eyes and concentrated on the direction the sounds of the fight were coming from. Luckily for her, Tobirama had not placed any marking nearby, so she had little trouble tracking him down. She charged her fist with chakra and activated the technique. She was surprised that it worked but had no time for self-congratulation. Here she was right behind Tobirama and managed to adjust her fist enough to dent him into the ground. She had not used the full force, but the crater was impressive and for a moment she feared if she had overdone it, but the man's snort proved he was alive.

‘Once again someone uses my technique against me’, he remarked and hissed in pain, feeling that his ribs were in shambles.   
‘When did you learn the Flying Thunder God jutsu, Sakura?’, Kakashi was impressed. ‘I assume Lord Senju taught you, but you never told me anything.’  
‘Yesterday’, she shrugged. ‘At a short distance, it does not require as much chakra.’

Sakura knelt to start treating Tobirama, but he vanished in a cloud of smoke.

‘Holy shit’, she cursed but it was too late.

The real Tobirama and his clone simultaneously crushed Haruno and Hatake to the ground. They both felt the cold blades on their necks.

‘While it was clever, I expected you to do it, Sakura’, he said with a smirk. ‘You fought well, Hatake. Few can perform one-handed techniques.’  
‘Stay alert’, she advised him a second before her fingers crushed his wrist.

She kicked the clone holding Kakashi with her chakra-charged foot and it flew into the trunk of the tree before disappearing. She was close to Tobirama - here she had the advantage. Hatake's techniques were at a level worthy of the Hokage, so when he created four walls of earth, the Senju knew he had a poor chance. Despite the darkness, he could predict Sakura's strikes through his sensory abilities, but that hardly meant he could stop them. His only advantage was that he could use Flying Raijin without the slightest effort and could be right behind her in a split second. He avoided her blows that way, and she was starting to get frustrated. Finally, Tobirama grabbed her from behind and knocked her over, his entire weight pinning her to the ground. She tried to throw him off her, but he held her firmly and close. She pulled out a kunai and put it to his neck, and he simultaneously did the same. They breathed heavily and smiled at each other full of satisfaction. Kakashi withdrew the earth walls. 

He wanted to step in at this point, but Sakura pulled her knees up higher and pushed Tobirama away. She assumed a fighting stance and activated her chakra scalpels. Senju had not forgotten about the other opponent and sent a shadow clone against him. Hatake nevertheless continued to watch their fight out of the corner of his eye. He admired how they matched each other on the battlefield. Tobirama dodged her blows and delivered his own, while she smoothly evaded almost every one of them. She managed to scratch his hand but took a kick to the chest herself. She slammed her back into a tree trunk, and when Tobirama moved towards her with his sword drawn, she used his technique again to move to the kunai nearby. They could both use the same markings, so she could not overuse this jutsu. The man immediately moved behind her, but she was ready for it and as soon as he appeared behind her, she hit him with her elbow. Reinforcing the blow with chakra knocked him to the ground, but it was not enough to defeat him. He kicked her knee from the side while lying down and she lost her balance for a moment, which Tobirama took advantage of. This time he acted more sensibly and immobilised her legs and arms. He created a water senbon in his mouth and aimed it right next to her head. 

‘I believe I have won’, he said in a whisper.

Sakura cursed herself as she watched his lips twist into a smile for a split second. She forced herself to look into his eyes and regretted it even more. The half-lidded triumphant look was, well, hot. Plus he was still holding her hands. Instinctively she started to heal his wrist, which she had damaged earlier, but they were both like in a trance. 

‘Yes, do... whatever it is’, Kakashi vaguely gestured towards them, evading another water missile. ‘And I will be killed by a clone. You guys wouldn't even notice.’

Well, he had a good term for it, but he suspected that introducing it to these two would bring down upon him a fury worthy of the gods, so he preferred to let it go. They promptly moved away from each other.

‘Hey, in theory, I was killed, so I can't help you’, Sakura joked poorly. ‘You’re on your own.’  
‘Lord Tobirama's shadow clones are much stronger than those created by others’, Kakashi admitted and blocked the wave of water with a wall of earth. ‘Well, I guess I have to use chakra-consuming jutsu to take it down. Raiton: Raijū Tsuiga!’

The beast surrounded by lightning jumped towards the clone. Its movements were unpredictable as its chakra raged. Raijū immediately bit into Tobirama's copy and destroyed it. The monster immediately moved towards its second target, and Senju jumped away from Sakura so as not to expose her to electrocution. The storm hound seemed to have a consciousness of its own, as it rushed after the man. Tobirama was in no position to use water to defend himself and had to run away, hoping that the technique had limited range. In the meantime, he fired several water projectiles at Hatake, but the beast caught them in its mouth and destroyed them with its fangs. Kakashi moved quickly, keeping Raijū as if on a leash. If it were not for the Flying Thunder God jutsu, Senju would not have been able to dodge the fangs of lightning. 

‘Kuchiyose no jutsu!’, Tobirama was at a safe distance to perform the summoning technique.

In his hands appeared the famous sword of the Thunder God. The same one they had seen once before. Pure electrical chakra surrounded the blade and the man himself. With a single swipe, he blocked the beast's attack and pushed it away.

‘Hiraishingiri!’, the combination of this tool and this technique was murderous.

There was an explosion and all three had to shield their eyes to avoid being blinded. Kakashi despite being a master of the lightning element fell to his knees as his technique turned against him. Sakura ran up to him and began to heal his arm. Senju finished the summoning and walked closer.

‘Unbelievable’, Kakashi said through teeth clenched in pain. ‘I saw this blade once, but your level of mastery is incomparable, Lord Tobirama.’  
‘I must commend you for forcing me to use it’, replied Tobirama with approval. ‘I have known this before, but you are truly worthy of the title of Rokudaime.’  
‘Thank you for your acknowledgement’, Hatake bowed respectfully.  
‘Sakura, are you all right?’, Tobirama looked carefully at the woman and saw signs of stress when he asked this question. ‘Although you caused me some trouble, something seemed off. Normally your punches would at least break my ribs.’  
‘Oh, just a temporary condition’, then he noticed her strange paleness. ‘One, two days tops and I will be fine again.’

He approached her and placed his fingers on her carotid artery.

‘Your pulse is barely perceptible’, he frowned. ‘Sakura, tell us what this is about.’  
‘I had to get rid of more blood because all the antidote went to that Uchiha’, she finally admitted. ‘Cultivation of hematopoietic stem cells is only possible using cord blood, so I am unable to recreate the lost amount.’  
‘You need to rest’, he announced and took her in his arms. ‘We are going back to camp.’  
‘I can walk on my own’, Haruno complained. ‘And I have to pick up my kunais.’  
‘Hatake, will you take care of this?’, asked Senju and Kakashi nodded. ‘In that case, I shall meet you in the camp.’

Tobirama disappeared, using Flying Raijin, and Kakashi immediately understood why Sakura cared about finding her blades. They were exquisite with cherry blossoms engraved on them. The man raised an eyebrow and shook his head when he saw Thunder God's mark.

‘She’s so oblivious’, he muttered to himself and started looking for the second kunai.

Meanwhile, Tobirama had already helped Sakura remove her armour, wrapped her in a blanket despite her protests and even added his own. He also brought her a portion of steaming hot soup prepared by one of the women. The kunoichi gratefully accepted the meal, and Senju was furious with himself for not noticing the evident symptoms sooner. Paleness, lethargy, subtle fluctuations of chakra. He admired the fact that she fought at a respectable level even in such a state. She finished her food and closed her eyes. The man sat right next to her and monitored her closely. After a few minutes, he sensed someone standing outside the door and guessed it was Hatake. He stood up carefully and slid the paper door open.

‘Here are her kunais’, Hatake whispered and handed him the blades, meaningfully looking at the engravings. ‘By the way, Sakura likes sweets, especially anko dango. You may find this information useful, Lord Tobirama.’

Just like that, he was gone. Tobirama kept a stony face throughout, but he was definitely not at ease. What had just happened here? The more crucial question was: where was he going to get the ingredients for dango? He thought about it for a moment, created a clone to watch over Sakura, and left the building. As he looked around, he saw the person he was looking for sitting in front of her quarters.

‘So, little Tobi, can I help you with something?’, the older woman patted the spot next to her with a warm smile. ‘Sit down and tell me what you need.’  
‘Morina-san, I will need anko dango’, he went straight to the point. ‘As soon as possible.’  
‘Oh, have you developed a sweet tooth?’, she laughed heartily. ‘Or perhaps your lovely lady pal needs some dango?’

He knew she was the only one he could turn to, so he endured the humiliation and entered her quarters. The furnishings were modest as in the rest of the camp, but the room was very different from the others. A hearth in the middle, cooking utensils, a supply of various food items and a katana on the wall. Yes, Morina Senju had been an onna-musha in her prime. One of the few women Butsuma Senju respected. Her weapon had severed many heads and limbs, though the person wielding it looked kind of warm and innocent. No one would have thought that this lady, who was just looking for rice flour while mumbling something to herself, had such a will to fight. Tobirama watched the whole process of preparing dango carefully so that he would not have to ask for help in the future. He had not even reprimanded himself for thinking that way. He finally admitted to himself - he wanted to establish a closer relationship with Sakura. Perhaps the sweets that were just being prepared could be a good start. Fortunately, the preparation was not complicated and Tobirama was confident he could make the dango himself if needed. Surprisingly, he received a fully prepared treat in no time. Morina instructed him to bring it to Sakura as soon as possible and pushed him out the door. He made no attempt to even deny it was for her. Some clansmen looked at him curiously, but no one dared to comment on what had happened. The man returned to his room, where Sakura was already awake and trying to get information out of the clone about where the original was.

‘For you’, he dismissed the clone and handed her the dango.  
‘Kakashi told you I like those the most, didn’t he?’, she smiled and gladly brought the sweets to her mouth. ‘Oh goodness, these are great. Have you ever tried dango? You sure don't look like a fan of sweets.’

The man shook his head, not trusting his voice. He was a bit nervous.

‘Then try some’, she suggested and held out her dango towards him.

Tobirama hesitantly tasted the snack. He frowned, chewing it. Then he thought for a moment and ate the rest. Sakura smiled, though he had just devoured something that was originally for her. Besides, she still had a total of eight dumplings left.

‘Do you want more?’, he nodded shyly. 

Eventually half of the dango went to Tobirama. The man ate the second portion much more slowly, enjoying the previously unknown taste. Sakura was delighted that he had taken a liking to sweets. But when he licked the remains of the syrup off his finger, she almost dropped her dango. He had not consciously done so and was not even looking at her, but Sakura's behaviour had not escaped him. Well, perhaps dango was indeed the way to her heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> onna-musha: a female warrior in Japan
> 
> the word Kakashi thought about was 'eyefuck'


	29. tension relief

Again that almost inexplicable tension. Tobirama half-consciously moved closer to Sakura. Dango was abandoned somewhere among the moss samples and armour parts. Experimentally, he reached out to touch her hair. She blushed and parted her lips. The man took this as an invitation. However, he did not expect to receive a fist to the stomach. He cringed from the unexpected pain.

‘What the fuck are you doing?!’, she yelled in rage. ‘We are supposed to be getting ready to move to a new village, not engaging in this foolishness!’

‘My apologies, I misunderstood…’, he immediately backed off. ‘I thought that was what you wanted.’

Sakura looked away.

‘My body wanted it’, she said after a moment's silence and Tobirama frowned. ‘I suppose I cannot blame you for interpreting it that way.’

‘I am not sure I understand’, he spoke slowly.

‘I have far more significant responsibilities than to engage in this type of relationship’, well, her words hurt. ‘And so do you.’

‘You are obsessed with duty more than me’, Tobirama began to feel his hothead side come out on top. ‘Your reasoning is ridiculous.’

‘I cannot take any chances’, she replied. ‘You Senju folk are idealistic. A relationship is not some miraculous remedy for everything.’

‘I never said it was’, he stated. ‘But how can you be sure it will harm you?’

‘Intimacy is a weakness, leaves you vulnerable’, she explained. ‘My mentor lost many years due to the loss of her partner. I refuse to repeat her mistake.’

Tobirama closed his eyes and contemplated her words for a moment.

‘Were I to lose you at this moment, I would be shattered’, he said and Sakura felt her heartbeat quicken. ‘Because I would no longer have you in my life and because I would not be able to reveal that I have feelings for you. Can you sincerely say you feel otherwise?’

In truth, he expected her to stubbornly deny his words again, but he put everything on the line. He had no regrets about his confession - he felt a weight come off his heart when he said those words. Sakura remained silent, so he sighed and stood up. To his surprise, the woman grabbed his wrist and pulled him back to the floor. There were tears in her eyes.

‘You stupid Senju, why do you make me feel this way?’, she whispered and put her hands on the back of his head. ‘For so long I denied myself such sentiments. How? Why did those few words have such an effect on me?’

She placed her lips on his and kissed him so passionately that he thought he was dreaming. There was urgency in that gesture. He reciprocated the kiss instantly, placing his hands on her waist. He slid his tongue into her mouth without hesitation. The taste of dango syrup made him slightly amused, but he paid little attention to it. Her quickened breath worked on him in some primal way. He pressed her to the floor, dominating the kiss. Sakura was many things, but most of all she was a proud woman. That was why she grabbed his shoulders and effortlessly turned him over onto his back. She bit his lip to indicate that she would not give up so easily. Tobirama would never have thought to let himself be dominated in such a situation, but it was quite enjoyable. For the sake of principle, however, he tried to regain control, but the woman was stronger and would not let herself be thrown off. With a look of satisfaction on her face, she pressed his wrists to the floor and kissed him once more. Without pulling away, he tried to crawl out from under her. It turned out to be a mistake because when he moved his hips, Sakura froze and then he realized what he had just done. Her red cheeks indicated it perfectly. She let go of his hands and stepped back in embarrassment.

‘Sorry, I was not doing it on purpose’, he said sincerely and leaned back on his hands. 

‘I-I figured as much, but…’, hearing this strong woman stutter was an interesting experience for him. ‘Look, let's just slow down. I never thought my first kiss would be with you. That is already a lot to process and-’

‘That was your first kiss?’, he was slightly surprised. ‘I have to admit I had not realised. You were…’

She tilted her head when he was unable to find the right word.

‘...highly confident’, he finished, although he knew this word did not describe the experience accurately. ‘I by no means felt you were inexperienced.’

‘Well, I have to make up for my lack of practice with something’, she laughed sheepishly. ‘I was afraid I might do something wrong.’

‘I would have no basis for comparison anyway’, he stated and was amused by the shock on Sakura's face. ‘I never had time for such foolishness.’

She detected the teasing reference to her earlier statement immediately and crossed her arms in annoyance, but smiled again. All of a sudden she turned serious.

‘We absolutely cannot allow this to get in the way of our plans’, she warned him. 

‘No need to explain it to me’, replied Tobirama.

‘Glad to hear that’, she smiled. ‘I am sorry, but I need to rest. My blood has not yet regenerated, although I am constantly stimulating the bone marrow with chakra.'

‘Constantly?’, he frowned. ‘If you were doing it even during... the moment we shared, I am impressed by your composure.’

‘Unfortunately, I must admit that I was unable to even think about it’, her cheeks reddened. 

Tobirama smirked, proud that he had managed to get Sakura to lose her perfect self-control. He picked her up to place her down on her mat. He was not required to do so, but any excuse to touch her longer was a good one. For so long the two of them had denied each other physical contact that now he enjoyed even the slightest touch. All that annoying tension was finally gone, and instead, there was relaxation. A fierce warrior with a keen mind had agreed to give him happiness and he hoped she felt the same way. He kissed her neck briefly and she squealed.

‘May I have one last kiss?’, his voice was lower than usual and Sakura felt warmth creeping up her cheeks.

‘This is very unprofessional, Hokage-sama’, she whispered jokingly, but Tobirama's gaze made her realise that she had provoked a different reaction than intended. ‘Sorry, I didn't mean to-’

He only wanted a brief, subtle kiss, but after hearing those words he changed his mind. His tongue greedily invaded her mouth. This time Sakura made no attempt to fight for dominance and that further energised him. The sexual tension that had built up for so long made him a little too eager to explore the newfound territory. The kunoichi gasped when his strong hands gripped her hips. This was completely new to her, both dangerous and addictive. She was already beginning to understand why ninja chased romantic relationships, even though they went against reason. Still, she wanted to get used to it and take it slow, so she very reluctantly removed his hands from her body. Tobirama was not offended - he was even thankful that she had stopped his irrational behaviour. She kissed him gently and stroked his hair.

‘You are going to make me lose my mind’, their foreheads touched. ‘I would love to have-’

‘You are not the only one here on the verge of losing control, so please refrain from finishing this sentence’, she said pleadingly, and he felt her press her thighs together under him. ‘Damn it, Tobirama, this is improper. Should we even be kissing? I hope you are not thinking I am a-’

‘Please do not be concerned about this’, he interrupted her nervous babbling. ‘Today’s standards are indeed stricter, but among the ninja, there is a slightly greater acceptance of such concepts.’

‘Thank you for reassuring me’, she replied and slid out from under him. ‘The thing is, I feel like I am betraying Sasuke.’

‘So you do love him’, he had trouble hiding his hurt. 

‘No, but he loved me’, she corrected him and looked away, clenching her fists. ‘He committed suicide. The villagers destroyed his ancestral home. Desecrated the graves of clan members. Called him a murderer and a traitor. He left us a letter in which he confessed his love for me. I had not felt anything for him for a long time. Maybe if I had not rejected him, he would be alive.’

‘You could not have possibly known that’, declared Tobirama. ‘The kid was traumatised. Perhaps this was inevitable.’

‘Perhaps’, her voice was weak as she tried not to cry. ‘Forgive me for ruining the mood.’

‘Nonsense’, he said. ‘Rest while I seal our belongings in scrolls. My brother's messenger may arrive at any time now.’

Tobirama wrapped a blanket around her and got down to the task he had just planned. Meanwhile, Sakura reached for a cold dango and ate it, immersed in her thoughts. 

‘I had already grown accustomed to the constant sexual tension in your presence to such an extent that I now feel odd’, the man almost fell over in astonishment.

‘How is it that you blush when I touch your hair but talk about such things without shame?’, he snorted. ‘You will be the death of me one day, Sakura.’

‘I am a medic so I have become desensitised to such topics’, she explained. ‘This is not the case with… action.’

‘So I will not get a reaction out of you if I say that I would like-’

‘Another pervert in my life, but to my misfortune, I fell in love with this one’, she complained. ‘Apparently, you have zero tolerance for perverts, and here you are. No wonder Sarutobi turned out like that.’

Tobirama blinked.

‘What?’, she asked.

‘You said you fell in love with me’, he stated dumbly.

‘Have we not already established this?’, she lifted her eyebrows. ‘I would not have kissed you if I felt nothing for you.’

‘I thought it was just physical attraction on your part’, Tobirama admitted. ‘In that case, I have a significant question for you.’

‘Please continue’, Sakura encouraged him, feeling that it will be an inquiry of a personal nature. 

‘Sakura Haruno, would you do me the honour of allowing me to officially court you?’, his tone was professional, but she saw uncertainty and hope in his eyes.

‘Are you aware that I will never give up my role as a kunoichi?’, she asked cautiously, not knowing what the answer would be. ‘I will not start a family with you. Maybe you should rethink that.’

‘I care about you, not what you could become, particularly if against your will’, he approached her. ‘You are a powerful, accomplished woman and that's the kind of person I want by my side, not behind me.’

‘So I have no objections’, her response relieved him. ‘I do not get why everyone thinks you are a stoic asshole. Sometimes you are indeed an asshole, but you definitely have some emotions there, and quite a lot of them.’

The man kissed her forehead and smiled. It was the first time she had seen so much warmth in his crimson eyes and the sight took her breath away. He went back to sealing their belongings, but at the same time, he did not terminate the conversation.

‘You are not unbiased’, he replied. ‘Only you discovered a side of me that I myself was unaware of. Fury on the battlefield, passion while working on techniques - this I knew about. But with you, I discovered I could be ashamed, joyous, confused, excited. That I can enjoy a touch.’

‘I have to say that at first, you were a major pain in the ass’, Tobirama humphed, hearing those words. ‘Perpetually offended and dismissive. When we argued, I felt like punching you into the ground and burying you. Stop looking at me like that, I want to be honest! Well, luckily I was mistaken. I first felt something bizarre when you told me to call you by your first name.’

‘Two can play at this game’, he smirked. ‘Your lack of respect drove me crazy. I distrusted you and sought ulterior motives in your plans. Furthermore, I hated that you questioned my decisions. Hatake, stop eavesdropping. The first time I looked at you differently was when you were reading about the seals. Tired, with dishevelled hair, but determined. I admired your work ethic.’

‘Where is he?’, she asked in a hushed voice; she got immediately infuriated when she heard the bit about Kakashi. 

‘Right outside the door’, Haruno nodded, stood up, and opened the door with such vigour that Tobirama was a little afraid of its condition.

The woman grabbed her friend by the collar and threw him into the room. She crossed her arms and he scratched the back of his neck, smiling sheepishly.

‘The sweets worked, I guess’, he commented awkwardly.

‘How much have you heard?’, Sakura snapped. 

‘Enough to congratulate you’, Kakashi gave them his characteristic smile with eyes closed. ‘You have nothing to worry about. Everyone kind of assumed that this is how it would turn out.’

‘Excuse me?’, Tobirama frowned.

‘I shall be explicit’, Hatake warned them. ‘Lord Tobirama, you two almost - pardon the language - fucked during training. Twice. Even a blind man would have noticed it. You have no idea how excited Hashirama was.’

‘That…’, Sakura spoke slowly, deeply in thought. ‘Makes sense. And it clarifies quite a few issues.’

‘I have to agree with you, Sakura’, added Senju. 

‘Oh Kami, the two most brilliant minds in history are so oblivious’, Kakashi slapped his forehead. ‘This is why it is essential to read literary masterpieces such as Icha Icha Paradise. I shall not disturb you, so-’

‘There’s an ass-beating that needs to be delivered to you, Kakashi’, Sakura cracked her knuckles. ‘You're not going anywhere until I get your eavesdropping out of your head.’


	30. shallow wounds, deep wounds

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> New chapter written in waiting for the exam results. Let's hope I pass, because I'm not short of inspiration lately. It would be a shame to waste it for the sake of atomic orbitals.

A few bruises later, Kakashi was thrown out of the quarters with orders to take some soldiers for training. Tobirama finished preparing the sealing scrolls and sat down next to Sakura. The strange high into which his interaction with the woman had put him had gradually faded completely. Clearly the same was true for the kunoichi, as she was contemplative, and not in a dreamy way. She breathed deeply and looked at the man.

‘What is the likelihood of us being so emotionally stunted that we mistake physical attraction for love?’, her question confirmed that she had the same concerns as Tobirama.

‘I would not even be surprised’, he admitted and laughed joylessly. ‘What hormones do to the human body is beyond astonishing.’

‘Or the fact that as shinobi we are raised to be tools, not beings capable of love’, she added and shook her head. ‘Shit. I behaved like an idiot, didn't I?’

‘No. It was quite enjoyable to feel a bit of happiness’, Tobirama spoke. 

He thought of that desperate kiss and her soft lips.

‘Being a ninja corrupts emotional development’, he added. ‘You said you love me so casually and regular people usually struggle with that.'

‘I know that I feel something different for you than for anyone else', the woman said. ‘Combat and medicine are much less complicated than emotions.’

Tobirama closed his eyes and thought about his feelings. He had never done it, but such introspection could prove beneficial. He felt pride, thinking of Sakura. Desire. Something seemed to squeeze his heart when she appeared in his mind. He wanted to protect her and he wanted to spend his future with her. So perhaps he had not made a fool of himself after all. If it was not love, it was a very strong infatuation as well as friendship. The woman had very similar sentiments, but she still tried to defend herself against them. Tobirama would probably have done the same if it had not taken him so long to recognise them. 

‘However, I am not backing down from my words. I still wish to court you. Logically, this makes sense’, he said finally. ‘If only for appearances.’ 

‘I agree. This seems to have more advantages than disadvantages’, she remarked. ‘I may not know if I love you, but you are certainly dear to me.’

‘It is exhausting to think about it. The lack of logic in feelings infuriates me’, Tobirama sighed heavily. ‘How do I know if what I feel is love? I do not want to hurt you. And… I do not want to be hurt by you, either.’

‘So do I, but at the same time I do not want to back out of it’, she averted her gaze. ‘I would not be able to, anyway. This is some kind of strange connection, some kind of magnetism. I do not understand it.’

‘Rest. I will leave on patrol’, he said and after a moment's hesitation, he decided to refrain from another kiss.

The dense forests always brought him solace when there were no enemies within them. He crouched on the ground and touched it. His skill was something he had always treasured. When his fingers made contact with the soil, he felt as if he was becoming one with the forces of nature. He was the wind that moved the leaves. He was the rain that moistened them. He was the clouds that slowly but surely moved across the sky. He was abandoning his physical form. There was nobody he could sense nearby, but he maintained the technique for a few more minutes. In this state, he had no need to think about any hardships. He circled the entire camp, scanning the area within a few kilometres, and suddenly something concerned him. He planned the paths and passing times of the patrols himself. Yes, he could sense six different people, which was the standard patrol count, but judging by the position of the sun, they should already be a hundred metres away. He decided to investigate this and, using his signature technique, found himself right behind them. The men looked at him with poorly concealed fright.

‘Give me your reason for stopping’, Tobirama went straight to the point. ‘You should be a hundred metres away.’

It was not beyond his notice that one of the members of the patrol was the same man who had nearly killed Sakura when the poisoned blades were found in her belongings. His keen mind immediately put the facts together.

‘I had to relieve myself’, said one of the men with a stupid grin. ‘The Uchiha pose no threat to us after all, so I guess I can afford to do something like that. Right, Lord Tobirama?’

One of the soldiers shifted nervously from foot to foot.

‘The protocol is clear that in such a situation, two people stay behind and four move on to ensure the continuity of the patrol’, Senju was not fooled. ‘I am not aware of any changes in procedures, and I am responsible for them.’

‘A moment's inattention, Lord Tobirama’, spoke another one. ‘It will not happen again. We promise.’

Tobirama's piercing eyes surveyed all six of them.

‘Move on’, he said finally, noting the droplets of sweat on their foreheads.

‘Understood’, replied the patrol leader and gestured for the others to proceed ahead.

The man crossed his arms and waited for the soldiers to move away. He saw their hesitant attempts to turn around. When they disappeared into the bushes, he used Hiraishin again to reach the patrol point a hundred meters away. He looked around carefully. Something was amiss. He used a sensory technique and immediately detected that a mid-grade illusion had been placed on the surroundings. He dispersed it effortlessly and saw what the matter was - the ground was covered in explosive notes. Two steps and he would have been tricked, had he not detected the genjutsu. He was not about to waste half his chakra on Kage Bunshin, so instead, he summoned a water clone, moved a safe distance away and commanded his copy to take on the trap. He enclosed the clone in a water cube to suppress the sound of the explosion. When he felt the clone disappear, he cancelled the technique. Under a layer of explosive notes was a metal plate, probably taken from a blacksmith. Checking for more traps, he picked it up and found a scroll underneath. He had been fully prepared for there to be an explosive note inside, so he jumped away unscathed. He had a bad feeling about it. He immediately used Hiraishin to transport himself to the quarters he shared with Sakura. She was not there and the door had been destroyed. Tobirama closed his eyes and felt the seal on her sternum outside the settlement.

Her body was stained with blood and judging by her paleness and the fact that she had released the seal on her forehead, it was her blood. Tobirama immediately drew his sword and stood beside her. Sakura was a powerful kunoichi, but as she was weakened, the faction of loyal supporters of Senju's former policy overwhelmed her. At least, that was what the man thought. However, when he swung his sword to attack the soldier who moved towards her, Sakura blocked his blade with a kunai and let herself be hit.

‘Sakura, what the hell are you doing?’, he asked in shock.

‘Talk sense into them, but don't kill anyone’, she asked pleadingly. 

‘What is the meaning of this?’, Tobirama decided to accept her request and ask for details later. ‘Put your weapons away.’

‘She killed our general’, growled one of the senior men and charged at him. ‘With your permission!’

‘He nearly broke a barely formed alliance’, replied Tobirama angrily and tried to push Sakura away, but she leapt between him and one of the Senju’s blade. ‘Sakura, stop it or you will die!’

‘I will not die so easily, and you may be able to convince them’, she uttered, snapping with bleeding hands the sword she had caught. ‘I will defend you, and you speak.’

‘Do you not see that she is willing to let herself be killed to save you from my wrath?’, he yelled. ‘If it were up to me, you would all be dead by now.’

‘You have allowed yourself to be deceived!’, someone else shouted. ‘How could the sons of the mighty Butsuma Senju act like this? The woman has to die, but she won’t!’

Tobirama narrowed his eyes.

‘What do you mean she won’t?’, he felt his blood begin to boil. 

‘Tobirama, calm down, please’, she whispered and with her fist created a crater in the ground to push back the charging men. 

It was then that Tobirama noticed the deep wound they had inflicted on her had not yet fully healed despite the rapid regeneration. The wound on her neck. She probably activated the technique at the last minute. Had it not been for that…

‘ _What do you mean she won’t die_ ’, he repeated in a calm voice but trembling with fury.

‘We almost cut the bitch's head off, but she did some trick and the wound healed’, one of the cocky men was apparently sure that Tobirama was too soft to kill his own clansmen. ‘I wonder which time it won't work?’

‘Tobirama…’, Sakura quietly said, but she knew what was about to happen.

‘I forbid you to defend them’, his unobjectionable voice made her give in. ‘You can only step in if you want to assist me, but I believe that will not be necessary.’

The kunoichi could only step back and watch the carnage that ensued. Tobirama's fury was terrifyingly beautiful and overwhelming. His chakra spiked so much that even Haruno, with her seal released, felt its onslaught. The weaker of the men fell to their knees under the sheer pressure of the chakra, and Tobirama's merciless blade decapitated them. Sakura knew deep down that his wrath was justified, but she deluded herself a little that maybe they could have been convinced. She was a little dismayed that it delighted her to see the white-haired Senju slashing down his opponents. To be honest, she wanted to join in. She missed the battle's adrenaline rush, but she hated to be like them. However, when someone spat in Tobirama's face, she had had enough. 

‘The time for mercy is over’, she snapped and leapt into the crowd of men. 

Now it was Tobirama's time for admiration. She danced among her opponents and knocked them to the ground. Her fighting style based on medical ninjutsu and extensive knowledge of anatomy allowed her to cut off the blood supply to the brains of these giant soldiers with a single touch. From the corner of his eye, Tobirama noticed that she had switched to chakra scalpels and was slitting throats with them. He preferred the sight of someone else's blood on her face to her own. Finally, the two warriors brought their backs together and looked at each other in the middle of the fight. She smiled at him and drove her fist into the chest of someone who was trying to plunge a sword into Tobirama's heart. It horrified her to feel so content taking lives. Her companion rammed his sword into the gut of the last standing opponent. They breathed heavily, surrounded by the metallic smell of blood and lifeless bodies. 

‘This is how pacifism dies, eh?’, she said, wiping away the blood from her hands.

‘What made you change your mind?’, he asked as if he had not been engaged in disposing of the bodies with seals. 

‘One of them spat in your face’, Tobirama snorted, hearing this reply.

‘Is my face more valuable than your life?’, he inquired. ‘I could have lost you and you are worried about some saliva on my cheek?’

‘They should have respected you as their leader’, she explained and began to look to see if he had any injuries. ‘I am an outsider, so no wonder they assaulted me. But you?’

‘They were my father's fanatics’, he said. ‘Militarism, child soldiers. They claimed that my brother and I were going against tradition.’

‘A shitty tradition if you ask me’, Tobirama could not disagree with her words. ‘Watching you in battle is an extraordinary sight.’

‘You should have seen yourself’, he smirked. ‘You were thirsty for blood.’

‘For revenge’, she corrected him. ‘Well, I cannot say that trying to decapitate me in my sleep did not offend me.’

‘Those bastards’, he muttered, using a Suiton jutsu to rinse the blood from the area. ‘They left a false trail to get me out of the camp. Scroll with explosive notes. My first thought was that they left a message there for an unknown enemy.’

‘Gods, what happened here?’, suddenly Kakashi appeared next to them. ‘I smelled blood a few hundred metres away.’

‘They tried to murder Sakura’, the explanation left Hatake speechless. ‘Even our protection and living in my quarters did not defend her. They did not expect this demon in a woman's body.’

Sakura laughed, which was quite gruesome as she was covered in blood from head to toe.

‘A demon? Aren't you exaggerating?’, she shook her head. ‘We better go and wash up before returning to camp. Kakashi, where are your subordinates?’

‘I told them to wait for my sign in case I needed support’, he said. ‘I will go and let them know that everything is relatively fine. You two reek of blood, so go away.’

* * *

Tobirama rinsed his armour in the river and used Hiraishin to get clean clothes for himself and Sakura without risking the questioning stares of the clan. He felt another twinge of rage when he noticed a stain of thick blood on the mat; he had no time to look at it before. With mild annoyance, he realised that he was dripping with blood himself and had stained the floor. He immediately went back to the riverside where Sakura was washing her turtleneck in the stream. Even her bindings were soaked in blood. He managed to find clean bandages in a pouch strapped to his leg. He placed them on the bank and also removed his upper clothing to rinse off the blood. After their earlier conversation, the shyness had partially disappeared and although they still did not intend to look at each other, they wordlessly walked into the river with their backs turned to each other and cleaned themselves.

‘Are you sure you have no injuries?’, she inquired. ‘The water is rather clean, but this does not mean that there are no bacteria in it. An infection can develop.’

‘Shallow cut on the left arm’, he replied. ‘This can wait.’

‘How do you define shallow cut?’, she asked cautiously. ‘In general, men tend to downplay their wounds.’

‘I can move my hand, so is shallow’, his answer did not satisfy her.

‘I promise not to look at you, but I need to heal this because you are starting to worry me’, she said. 

‘I have nothing to be ashamed of’, he smirked; Sakura became irritated, so she turned away immediately.

Of course, she had to blush at the sight of his back. But since he said he had nothing to be ashamed of, she figured there was no reason not to look. Dozens of scars all over his back almost blended with the red tattoos that resembled those on his face. When she saw his injury, however, she immediately abandoned all such thoughts. It was no shallow cut. She immediately conjured up medical chakra and began to heal the wound.

‘What do you consider a deep wound? A severed limb?’, she scolded him. ‘Idiot.’

‘A nearly chopped off head’, Sakura rolled her eyes, hearing those words. ‘I appreciate your concern, but it would have mended without your treatment.’

‘You would be an even bigger idiot if you refused treatment with a medic right here’, she replied. ‘What if the blade happened to be poisoned? The effects of some poisons are visible once it is too late.’

She withdrew her hand, pleased with the results of her medical ninjutsu. He turned to her and she thanked fate that he only moved his head. Instinctively she covered her breasts, but he was looking into her eyes.

‘Thank you, Sakura’, he spoke and returned to scrubbing the dried blood but she continued to look at him. ‘What? I feel you stare into my back.’

‘I simply think it is amusing that in a matter of hours we went from a surge of hormones to a logical analysis of our feelings’, she said. 

‘So no hormone surges now?’, Tobirama smirked. ‘If so, I envy you.’

‘What do you-’, she gasped. ‘That was far more direct than I would have expected from you. And I remind you that we killed people a few minutes ago.’

‘You did not deny it’, he remarked and she remained silent until the return to camp.


	31. dark confessions, spoiled fun

If there were still some supporters of Butsuma's iron hand and people hostile towards the newcomers among the Senju, none dared to admit it. When Tobirama and Sakura crossed the gates of the camp, everyone bowed to them. Perhaps it was the newly acquired respect for the young lord, perhaps fear, or perhaps gratitude for getting rid of the conspirators? Whatever the reason, it seemed unlikely that anyone would attempt to defy the leaders once again. The warriors hung up their wet clothes on a string. Together they scrubbed the bloodstains from the floor. The problem was the paper door, or more specifically the lack of material to repair it. A messenger with a letter could arrive any moment, so there was no point in replacing it anyway. They relocated to Hashirama's room, from where Tobirama did not hesitate to snatch tea once again. The warm beverage was salvation after the ice-cold bath. The man began to seal his brother's belongings so that they would be ready for the journey.

‘It seems that guilt is starting to kick in’, Sakura said to break the silence. ‘Would be worrying to feel nothing after murdering all these people.’

‘In the name of peace we were obliged to do so’, Tobirama replied. 

‘I feel that my stay made more harm than good here’, she closed her eyes and breathed heavily. ‘This would not have happened had they not attacked me. My presence led to their deaths.’

‘They would indeed have survived’, hearing these words, she felt a dangerous stinging under her eyelids. ‘However, be aware that these were the people who ended up on the Council and influenced Hokages' decisions. We most likely prevented a second tragedy.’

‘What event are you referring to?’, she frowned.

‘My brother and I wanted to prevent children from being drawn into the fight. My father's supporters were the ones who pushed through the idea of keeping training kids’, he explained. ‘We would never have agreed to chūnin exams where young people risked death.’

‘Kakashi was made a chūnin at the age of six’, Sakura hid her face in her hands and after a moment she looked up at the man again. ‘Gods, I cannot imagine what he must have suffered then. I will not reveal to you what I know about him, but-’

‘I have read your records’, Tobirama interjected. ‘I am not proud of it, but I needed to know if I could allow you to go ahead with the plan.’

‘This is a violation of privacy, albeit an understandable one’, she admitted. 

‘Something was missing from your file’, he spoke after a moment’s thought. ‘In the passage about the clash with that brat Orochimaru.’

It was a painful memory for Sakura. Instinctively, she placed a hand on her shoulder where the scar she had gotten rid of used to be.

‘As you well know, Naruto was a jinchūriki. At that moment, he lost his self-control. Information about this has been classified’, she hoped Tobirama would be satisfied with the vague details.

‘There is something more to it’, he remarked, promptly crushing Sakura’s expectations. ‘Your files would not have the missing few paragraphs about jinchūriki's fury.’

‘I loathe talking about my failures, although I will not deny that they happened’, she said. ‘That day I found out why shishō would not let me look at Naruto's file. I had never heard of bijū before, we were not taught about it. When I saw my teammate grow four tails, I was petrified. Have you ever seen the second level of the tailed beast release?’

‘I witnessed something like this shortly before my death’, he replied grimly. ‘Gold and Silver Brothers were pseudo-jinchūriki, which I found out too late.’

‘In the case of true jinchūriki, this red chakra is fused with blood. The vessel suffers as the body destroys and renews itself over and over again’, Sakura's voice was monotone, calm and professional. ‘All the skin is peeled off. The pain is so great that the beast takes control of the body because the jinchūriki loses consciousness. The vocal cords are damaged as the person shrieks in agony. Hence the roar associated with the uncontrolled Second Stage. With suffering comes overwhelming power. I attempted to stop him, and then he almost chopped off my arm with a single claw. The wound took several months to heal. Despite my training, the beast surpassed me and rendered me useless until the end of the fight. Then Kabuto stopped my bleeding. I felt humiliated since my enemy had saved me. That day I vowed to myself that I would get the power.’

‘To tame a tailed beast is a feat available to few’, replied the man, having processed this information. ‘You need Sharingan or Wood Style for this.’

‘This is not true’, his eyebrows rose. ‘Are you familiar with Kongō Fūsa?’

‘I cannot say that I am’, Tobirama's interest has grown even more.

‘Naruto's mother, Kushina of the Uzumaki clan, could create chains capable of holding down the Nine-Tails’, Sakura explained, resolve clear on her face.' I believe that if I can raise my level of chakra control to the limit, I will be able to create a similar technique.’

The man looked at her in disbelief.

‘You are gifted, but this is madness’, he declared. ‘You have no Uzumaki chakra.’

‘I am tired of the fact that not having kekkei genkai or the proper genes makes me inferior’, she snapped. ‘I want power. It was not given to me, but I will gain it through effort and knowledge.’

‘You are treading a dangerous path which I once took’, Tobirama was truly concerned.

‘Do you know how many poisons circulate in my blood along with antidotes? Did you know that I can achieve true immortality if I replace all my body cells with stem cells? Do you know how many times I hurt my own body to learn how to heal?’, Sakura tilted her head and looked into his eyes. ‘My path is different from yours.’

‘How so?’, he asked quietly. 

‘The only human being on whom I experiment is me’, her explanation hurt his pride, but it was true. ‘So it scares me that I am developing feelings for you. What if I decide to follow your example?’

‘You are too kind a person to do so’, he objected but was dreading her answer, for subconsciously he felt what would follow.

‘What if that is what I want?’, her whisper was strangely quick. ‘I feel that something is pulling me in this direction. When you disposed of the bodies, I thought it was a missed opportunity. I understand you better and better, Tobirama. However, now that you have realised that it was morally wrong, we are in the reverse situation.’

Tobirama took her hand and pressed it to his lips. He kissed her fingers and she looked at him in surprise. Something wickedly warm was in his crimson eyes. 

‘I have never stopped feeling that shadowy pull’, his confession left her speechless. ‘It is not something that can be got rid of so easily. It amazes me how you managed to hide it from me for so long.’

‘I try to hide it from myself, but I knew that if I lied, you would know right away’, when the astonishment subsided, she spoke up. ‘Is it the shinobi world that has corrupted us, or are we corrupted from within?’

‘All I know now is that I most certainly cannot lose you. We must control each other or I will succumb to the darkness again with you alongside me’, the man replied and moved closer to the woman without breaking eye contact. ‘I thought some time ago that you were full of contradictions, but now I know this whole is coherent. It was the last bit that put the chaos together.’

Those numerous seals on her back, the demonic muscle power, the extensive knowledge of anatomy and that work ethic. That determination in pursuit of her goal. Everything suddenly began to make sense. Sakura wanted to prove to the laws of nature that she stood above them. She mistrusted Kabuto because he had once been the way she hoped she would be. Both she and Tobirama were as obsessed with power and knowledge as Orochimaru, but unlike him, they also retained their humanity. The man felt a strange thrill. If he had admired Sakura before, now he saw her as his destiny. He was reserved, but capable of warmth. She tried to suppress her emotions, but she could be ruthless. They were both devoted to their work, craving strength, lonely and full of regret. Tobirama was ecstatic. He kissed her passionately and she slid her fingers into his hair. She pulled away suddenly, breathing heavily. 

‘We are in your brother's room’, she reminded him with a smile.

‘We have just confessed to ourselves that we are horrible human beings’, he smirked. ‘Curious that you still worry about such things.’

‘My morality may work selectively, but I still have it’, she returned to the kiss anyway.

They were sick, they were broken, they were heroes whose downfall no one knew about but them. They independently fantasised about spending nights together in the laboratory and exchanging ideas. Unhinged seekers of knowledge who were greatly adored. Did they deserve admiration? Well, partly yes. The world was not binary. The average person asked about the most morally corrupt member of Team Seven would point to Sasuke, but all indications pointed to Sakura deserving that title. The woman had lost her reluctance to get emotionally involved with Tobirama, simply because it appeared that she was just as shady as he was. They were like madmen balancing on the edge of sanity. Everything was complicated, but it was gradually becoming simpler. They were destined for each other. The obstacle of time proved to be insignificant. It seemed that Haruno, wanting to correct his mistakes, was about to make her own. Yes, she did think that hatred towards the Uchiha was wrong. She did love Kakashi like a brother, and Tsunade like a mother. Her emotions were pure, as were some of her goals. No one said the corruption had to be thorough. 

He bit her lip to the blood and licked his lips. Sakura was curious about his new boldness, but this time he pulled away from her. He sighed heavily and pointed with his head towards the door. She nodded in understanding and carefully moved away to the appropriate distance. Tobirama had no need to adjust his dishevelled hair - it looked only slightly more chaotic than usual. Soon a kneeling figure appeared behind the paper door. 

‘Come in’, Sakura admired Tobirama's ability to regain composure in mere seconds.

‘Lord Tobirama, I come with a message from your esteemed brother’, the visitor bowed respectfully and handed the scroll to Senju.

The man knew, of course, that the message would contain an order to start moving the camp, but he read the text anyway in case anything beyond that came up. Once finished, he nodded and handed the scroll back to the messenger, who in turn burned it with a low-level fire technique. Tobirama dismissed him and sealed the remaining items in the scrolls.

‘I will go and pass on the information to the clansmen’, he said, putting on his armour. ‘Could you collect all the scrolls in the meantime?’

‘Of course’, she replied and he left. 

It did not escape her notice that Tobirama did not give her an order but merely asked. She did not intend to refuse under any circumstances, yet she welcomed the gesture. It crossed her mind that sealing all the scrolls in one would be easier, but if the man had not done so, it meant there was a reason. A limited capacity, perhaps? She decided to investigate at her leisure. Now she clipped the scrolls together with a strap and put on her armour. She went outside, where Kakashi was waiting with the shinobi prepared to leave. 

‘How do you find yourself in the role of general?’, Sakura asked him quietly and gasped: she just noticed something. ‘I refuse to believe it. Are you constantly maintaining henge?’

‘You finally noticed’, he smiled with closed eyes. ‘I have a large supply of chakra and only use it on my face when people are around.’

‘You look... worse’, she frowned. ‘Are you afraid that women will throw themselves at you?’

‘Perhaps’, Kakashi pretended to be thoughtful. 

‘Can't you just put on a mask and pretend you have some kind of scar?’, she suggested.

‘A few rows behind me stands a man with no left eye, proudly displaying his scar’, he spoke quietly. ‘I doubt they will respect me if I hide a wound, existing or not. Perhaps at some time, I will drop henge altogether.’

‘You still haven't answered my question, my fault anyway. How is the general's life?’, she left the subject, knowing that Kakashi's relationship with his face was complicated.

‘They are glad to finally have someone competent and actually seasoned in battle as a leader rather than an official in armour’, he shrugged. ‘And I am comfortable in a leadership role when the expectations of me are not excessive.’

Tobirama approached them. He tried not to show his possessiveness, as their relationship was a secret to everyone but Kakashi, but he did send a meaningful look to the man. He was well aware they were just friends, still, he thought it could not harm to be cautious. 

‘What is the plan, Lord Tobirama?’, Hatake asked formally.

‘You and the army will escort the civilian part of the camp’, he commanded. ‘I will send my clone with you. Sakura and I will seal the buildings. If you encounter any problems, we will arrive as soon as possible.’

‘Understood’, replied Kakashi and looked around. ‘I have passed your sealing scrolls to the shinobi and all of them are back, so the clansmen's preparations should be complete.’

‘Very well’, Tobirama nodded and created a clone. ‘You have my permission to go.’

Hatake gestured for the shinobi to surround the civilians to lead them safely to the compound. As they stepped outside the camp gates, Tobirama pulled out a bunch of paper seals and handed half of them to Sakura. He touched the ground to see if anyone was left in the buildings. Even civilians had minuscule amounts of chakra, so there was no risk of missing anyone.

‘All buildings empty. You will handle the ones on the left, I will take these on the right’, he announced. ‘Any objections?’

‘None’, she replied and went to attend to her part of the task.

The seal created by Tobirama was simple to use and effective. Securing the buildings did not take long and a few minutes later they met at the gate. They glanced around the empty camp and looked at each other. The man lifted Sakura's chin and kissed her far more gently than before. 

‘Don't be so gentle’, he had already heard these words from her once and a week later they worked the same way.

‘Say it again, see what happens’, Tobirama muttered and bit her lip again, this time harder than before. ‘Consider this a warning.’

On the one hand, she wanted to take it slow. On the other hand, she just found herself unable to endure anymore. She knew Tobirama would not hurt her. In case she panicked, she had enough physical strength to interrupt at any time. Less true for her strength of will. They were ninjas, and though it was extremely unlikely in their case, they might not live to see another day. They had a higher purpose, but they were also only human.

‘You have caught my interest’, she whispered. ‘Allow me to reiterate: don’t be so gentle.’

‘I know you can stop me with one hand. Do it’, he growled and his tongue traced a path along her jawline. 

He pressed her to the gate and bit the visible part of her neck. 

‘Stop me’, he repeated with a shaky breath. ‘This place is not worthy of you.’

‘I am afraid I might not be able to’, she muttered. 

Her words were not helping to ease his excitement, but by some miracle, he managed to push himself away from her. Tobirama looked away to avoid temptation and held out his arm.

‘I will transport us as close to the village as I can’, said in his usual voice, although it sounded a little lower. ‘Hold on tight.’

Sakura knew the man was right not to let the experience be ruined by choosing the wrong setting, but she was a little disappointed. The treacherous human body was mightier than reason. She nodded and followed his command, focusing hard on not touching him more than necessary. This time she was thankful that the Flying Raijin was causing physical discomfort because she needed some distraction. The strange pulling sensation in her lungs worked wonders, as now she was only focused on not throwing up. She felt warmth in her heart, seeing the familiar forest. It was similarly dense as it had been in her time, probably because after Hashirama's death, no one could make buildings without using natural wood and trees were often cut down. 

‘From here we will not be using Hiraishin’, Tobirama said, his composure already in place. 

He would have said it was because Sakura needed to get the red off her cheeks, but he suspected that saying it out loud might have the opposite effect. They ran in silence and after several minutes arrived at the gates of the new Konoha. Hashirama greeted them with Madara at his side.

‘Come on, come on! All the Uchiha are already here!’, he said and lowered his voice for the next part. ‘Madara already knows everything.’

‘My congratulations, Lord Hokage’, she bowed to Madara, and Tobirama, against logic, felt somehow jealous. 

‘And my thanks, Sakura Haruno’, replied the Uchiha with a gentle smile, which she would have never been able to imagine in the past. ‘You are a far more incredible woman than I thought until now.’

‘Anija, have you taken care of the laboratory?’, Tobirama interrupted bluntly. ‘Sakura and I would like to set up a place for research as soon as possible.’

They had not talked about it before. Well, there were some... plans, but not that sort of plans. Sakura immediately saw through his motives but said nothing, just smiled sweetly. Then the younger Senju felt that he had made a mistake. 

‘Of course, Tobi!’, Hashirama exclaimed and the man cringed. ‘I will take you there.’

Suddenly Sakura was not annoyed anymore, seeing the blush of shame on Tobirama's face. They obediently followed the clan head and took off their armour, having arrived at the laboratory. 

‘Tobi?’, she said with amusement when they were alone. ‘That I have not yet heard.’

‘Old fool’, he muttered under his breath. 

‘And what was that about setting up a place for research?’, she teased him, clearly too entertained. ‘Was someone jealous of the bow?’

‘You do not need to bow down to him if he knows who you are’, he avoided the reply. 

‘Or perhaps it was the title?’, yes, she took some revenge for his words in the river. ‘Not to worry, Hokage-sama, I-’

‘I do not want a repeat of the situation at the gate, so not another word’, he leaned against the table. 'Gods, Sakura. Why are you doing this to me?’

‘You are absolutely right’, she spoke with mock professionalism and took out a scroll with his moss samples. ‘Forgive me. By all means, please feel free to go and study this unbelievable peat moss.'

‘Why are you so petty?’, he sighed heavily. ‘Do not start this game.’

‘Why shouldn't I?’, she crossed her arms. 

‘Because I will steal that ridiculous Hokage hat from Madara and you will call me Nidaime-sama until you cannot remember another word’, she froze. ‘I win. Give me those samples.'

‘Stupid Senju’, she murmured with a face redder than the aforementioned cap but fulfiled his request. ‘Oh, by the way, sphagnum moss is excellent for retaining soil moisture and is also suitable for-’

‘Will you please shut up?’, he barked and she laughed.

Fuck. She spoiled all the fun for him in studying the plant's properties. Still, he swore to himself that he would not let it show and stared at the moss for the next hour while Sakura unsealed his lab equipment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I do love moss. My username is the name of a species of moss. I wear green clothes to feel like a patch of moss. I also have a green pillow that resembles moss. I go to the forest to take pictures of moss. I read about moss in my spare time. Apologies, but moss is likely to be a recurring theme in my stories.


	32. poison again, but without tea

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW: drugs?/poison

Tobirama was furious that he had failed to discover anything beyond the properties Sakura had already presented to him unquestioned. The fact that he kept thinking about her had a part in it. He pouted almost comically, studied the moss for another moment, and stood up with such vigour that his chair fell over. The woman looked at him inquiringly, herself busy arranging the laboratory equipment. 

'I cannot concentrate’, he complained with a scowl. 'I need to take a walk.'

'Allegedly you are the rational one, but it will be another thousand years before you catch up with me in suppressing emotions', she declared cheerfully. 'Your face shows more than it seems.’

He looked at her with a mixture of amusement and physical representation of the word 'seriously'? 

'You're the one blushing like a fool at a mere suggestion’, he said and directed his steps to the door, picking up his armour and scrolls. 'I see you have already arranged the equipment, so there is nothing left to do but to proceed to the Senju district.’

The woman raised an eyebrow.

'Have you already forgotten that I explicitly asked Hashirama for a place in the underground of the hospital?" she asked in surprise. 'The shared quarters were a temporary precautionary measure.’

'We do not need to share a room, but I will not let you live in the hospital’, Tobirama was insistent. 'Independence is one thing, but a sensible solution is another.’

'I made my decision long ago', she crossed her arms and looked at him defiantly. 'You cannot order me around or decide what is sensible and what is not. I have to be close to the patients. You already made it difficult for me once.'

'There are not enough people here for you to have to work at night too’, the man protested. 

'I need privacy, Tobirama’, Sakura strapped the pieces of her armour together to carry it. 'I do enjoy your presence, but it is overwhelming.’

'That is ridiculous', he snorted. 'For so long you have not complained about us sleeping in the same room.'

'For a week', she added to his statement. 'I have been on longer missions, but when it is not a necessity, I prefer to have peace and quiet.'

'Or would you like to invite some of the Uchiha to join you?', Tobirama began to get annoyed with her refusal. 'It did not take you long to throw yourself at me, so maybe history will repeat itself.'

'No', she felt her eyelid twitch with anger. 'Your accusations are baseless and disgusting.'

'Then why are you unwilling to accompany me?', Senju was unable to understand.

'I was merely a guest in your quarters. I never complained when you woke up at night and worked on a technique or when you were unable to fall asleep. Now I have the opportunity to get back to normal functioning and please do not attempt to take it away from me', had it not been for her developed composure, she would have destroyed something by now. 'I have a week of stagnation to catch up on.'

Tobirama realised that he had been selfish all this week. It failed to cross his mind that Sakura, after all, was also a researcher and needed the conditions to progress too. He had not even offered her a stupid blank scroll and something to write with. She was engaged in storing chakra in her spare time, but she could do it without any conscious effort. Likewise her experiments on the inside of her body. Such an accomplished medic hardly needed to be entirely focused on controlling the processes inside the organism. The only thing he offered her was the opportunity to watch him create an information transfer technique. He should be apologising.

'Have it your way', pride prevented him from admitting his mistake though. 'I will escort you to your destination.’

'I will go by myself', the woman replied, slipping past him and opening the door. 'Stop being a possessive asshole. A regular asshole is more than enough.’

He had no time to protest, and besides, he knew Sakura was right. Over these few days, he had become accustomed to the idea that she belonged to him. After talking about the similarities, he took it for granted. He was downright furious with himself for being naïve enough to think that the kunoichi would reject her autonomy for him. He looked at the scrolls, shook his head, and waited a moment to avoid running into the woman after she left. He knew it was not worth it to get in her way. Sakura, meanwhile, found the elder Senju in the company of Madara. The two seemed to be inseparable. 

‘Lord Hokage, could I steal Hashirama for a second?’, she asked with a smile.

‘By all means’, he replied, an amused expression on his face. ‘You can take his sad face out of my eyes.’

‘I repeat once again that it is not sad’, Senju muttered and turned to face Haruno. ‘How can I help you, my dear?’

‘You have remembered to make the rooms under the hospital a reasonable size, right?’, wanted to make sure that everything was going according to plan.

‘I have done something much better!’, he sounded proud and Sakura dreaded the answer, but needlessly. ‘Your new living space is connected to the office. Let me show you everything!’

Sakura followed the excited Hashirama and wondered if there was any other reason for this than creating a village with a better future. When they reached the hospital and entered her office, she was filled with delight. The desk was larger than the previous one. Senju must have noticed that in Konoha from the future, there was no room for documents on her desk. There were more shelves and cabinets. Her quarters, however, were most impressive. There was a huge bookcase. Sakura noticed it was filled with medical and natural history books - Hashirama must have imported them specifically for her. She immediately recognized the blood-red expensive fabrics she had learned about at the Academy. They came from the Land of Whirlpools, whose inhabitants specialized not only in sealing but also in sewing. The blanket on her new bed was made of this precious material. It was said to be as light as a feather, but unbelievably warm. After the destruction of the country in the future, only scraps remained, mostly in private collections. Here was also a desk for Sakura, but slightly smaller. A supply of blank scrolls, writing utensils, lab equipment, and even a tiny greenhouse for herbs.

‘A little birdie told me what your favourite colour is’, Hashirama explained, noticing her awe. ‘Hardly enough thanks, but I thought providing you with a good environment was the bare minimum. My brother can be unbearable, so I thought one set of equipment just for you would prove useful. You know, if you were no longer able to share a laboratory.’

‘All this is probably worth more than my entire shinobi salary combined’, she muttered, touching the costly fabric. ‘Thank you, Hashirama. I know that I have already received too much to have demands, but I have one more request.’

‘Anything for you, darling Sakura!’, he exclaimed, surprised that she might have thought it was too much.

‘I want to go out to get something for a personal project. Could you forbid Tobirama to seek me in the meantime?’, Hashirama was not pleased with this wish, but could not refuse.

‘I only allow it because in case of danger you will be able to handle it’, Hashirama stated. ‘I will not pry into what transpired between you, but I will do everything in my power to prevent him from looking for you.’

‘You have my gratitude, Hashirama’, Sakura bowed respectfully. ‘I will try to sort this out as soon as possible.’

Hashirama raised an eyebrow as the woman used Flying Raijin kunais to quickly leave the village. He shook his head with a smile and rejoined his companion. Madara strolled through the settlement with a thoughtful expression. His friend put his hand on his back.

‘I missed you and your sorry mug’, Uchiha snorted. ‘Processing all this knowledge is difficult.’

‘Let us celebrate peace and prevent new missteps’, replied Hashirama. ‘I missed you too, Madara. Far longer than you can imagine.’

They stood on a hill where Uchiha's face was carved into the rock. Senju looked admiringly at the pride in his long-time friend's eyes. The Uchiha gazed at the buildings and compared the new layout of the village with how it looked in Hashirama's memories. Yes, he was most definitely grateful to Sakura Haruno and Kakashi Hatake. His black eyes looked lovingly at his clansmen who were beginning to build their stalls and shops. A trading ground was also being established so that Konoha would get more funds to operate. The suggestion to develop trade had come from Hatake and Madara was surprised that no one had thought of it in the old days. Well, they were people raised by war. Shifting priorities immediately was demanding. They were unable to savour the solitude for too long, as Tobirama appeared behind their backs.

‘Permission to go outside the area of the village?’, asked Tobirama more out of habit than out of respect.

‘Denied’, replied Hashirama and both his brother and Madara raised their eyebrows. ‘Now, before you ask: I do know about Sakura's absence. Since it is for personal reasons, she must be able to concentrate, so you are forbidden to leave.’

‘Understood’, the man replied reluctantly. 

A personal project she did not tell him about and proceeded to carry out immediately after the argument. It might have been a coincidence, but it might as well not have been. Tobirama respected his brother and his orders. Since he had not lost his head completely, he only grimaced to himself and sat down on the roof of the hospital, from where he could see all the gates of Konoha well.

Sakura, meanwhile, collected the plants and put them away in a small container. What she was working on was her recipe for a potent poison. She had been working it out in her mind for the past week and needed to do something meaningful so she would not feel she had wasted her time. The plants in the mix were found practically everywhere. The key to making it work properly was in the right way to prepare it. She finished gathering the ingredients and returned to the village. Tobirama landed in front of her and she reflexively took a defensive stance.

‘Where have you been?’, asked the man, eyeing her suspiciously.

‘I had to take a break’, she answered evasively but with confidence. 

‘What are you working on?’, his eyes narrowed. ‘I detest having things hidden from me.’

‘If you prefer not to cause a scene, go away’, Sakura snapped.

Senju only grew more concerned. He crossed his arms as she entered the hospital building. It never escaped his notice that she went up instead of down. Could she be working on some kind of medicine? But why, in that case, had she not told him directly? He jumped onto the roof of the adjacent building, but all he saw were the covered windows. Meanwhile, Sakura dropped the Flying Raijin kunais in the office, entered her quarters and put a seal on the door from the inside so that it could not be opened easily. Tobirama would undoubtedly be able to break it, but she would have several seconds to hide the contents of the room. She took off her turtleneck, breathed heavily a few times, bit down on her kunai and activated her chakra scalpel. With surgical precision, she cut off a flap of skin at the level of her sternum and hissed in pain. The kunoichi immediately activated her healing technique and destroyed the sealed piece of skin. She checked further to see if she could sense the Flying Raijin mark so damaged and was satisfied to find that she could not. She crushed some of the herbs in the mortar with a pestle. Ignoring the bitter taste, she chewed the blackened leaves of another plant and spit them out into a jar. Normally she would have used an artificially created amylase, but she worked on a goddamn poison, so she hardly found it disgusting. Sakura lit a fire under the flask to heat the chewed plant, constantly swirling the container. She mixed the ingredients with a spatula. All that remained was to take a small, carefully measured dose to check the effects...

She finished her work just in time, as Tobirama stood at her door. Of course, he tried to use Hiraishin to find her, but when he failed to sense her mark, he panicked. 

‘Shit’, she muttered and recklessly took a dose of her poison, not as carefully measured as she planned.

Sakura sped up her metabolism, hearing the Senju curse outside the door at the sight of the seal. She felt the first effects of the substance the moment the man burst into her bedroom. 

‘How did you destroy my seal?’, he thundered and grabbed her by the shoulders.

‘I hold no grudge against you, but I insist that you go away’, she said.

‘But first, explain to me how and why you did it’, he did not let her go.

‘I tore off my skin and ripped it into small pieces’, the calmness in her voice frightened him. ‘Go away.’

He let go of her shoulders and touched her chin. He wanted to look into her eyes, to seek some answers there. Perhaps sadness or anger? Something squeezed his heart when he saw nothing there. Her eyes were cold. That was the first time he realized that there was always affection in her gaze. Could it be that his jealousy had so damaged their relationship in just a few hours?

‘Forgive me’, Tobirama said quietly, but her stare remained blank. ‘Or refuse, but say anything.’

‘Go. Away’, he acknowledged her request, but there was still something unsettling about her.

Being already on the threshold, he looked at her again. She was kneeling on the floor strangely upright. Her eyes were alert and intelligent, but cold. The pupils were of normal size. Still, Tobirama knew instinctively that something was wrong. He stepped back and tried to touch her again, but she tilted her head in a questioning gesture as if to wordlessly ask what else was he doing here. Was that how it felt to have a broken heart? Tobirama was becoming more and more in favour of Sakura's view of feelings being a weakness. That feeling of heaviness in the heart, that void, that vulnerability. He felt like collapsing to the floor as soon as he left her bedroom. Instead, however, he headed straight for his brother. He refused to divulge details to him. The younger Senju thought it was a personal matter between him and the woman. 

‘Anija, it has been a while since we trained together’, he spoke and nodded towards Madara despite himself. ‘Fancy a spar?’

‘Oh, well. Gladly’, Hashirama was surprised that his younger brother offered to train with him, but he was pleased. ‘Sakura will not be joining?’

‘No’, answered a little too quickly, but Hashirama tactfully pretended not to catch it.

On the battlefield, the two brothers knew each other's moves perfectly and their spar looked more like a dance than a fight. Where he lacked in power, Tobirama made up for in speed. This made them almost equal, though in a serious combat Hashirama would undoubtedly win. Now, however, the older sibling felt that Tobirama needed to tire himself out to work through some unknown problem. He was deliberately letting him get close so they could have a hand-to-hand fight. The Senju did not handle their emotions well, but they were still able to be supportive. Especially when the support required creating a few bruises. 

Half an hour later they paused when Tobirama sensed a large group of people - most likely the approaching clansmen with Kakashi in the lead. Hashirama patted his younger brother on the shoulder and sent him to fetch Madara. He directed his steps towards the gate.

‘How many did they kill?’, Hashirama asked Kakashi a question under the cover of a greeting embrace. ‘The messenger told me but without details.’

‘Sixty-three’, he reported quietly. ‘No more incidents.’

After a moment, Madara appeared, accompanied by Tobirama and Izuna. Kakashi felt a shudder at seeing this man in the robes of the Hokage, but he knew it was the right thing to do. He cast a concerned glance at Senju, seeing that Sakura was not around. With a blink, Tobirama closed his eyes for a slightly longer moment to show that he knew what was happening to her. Or at least where she was. As the people dispersed, Hatake approached the younger Senju with forced casualness. However, before he had time to ask about Sakura's whereabouts, she ran up to him. It bothered her that something had happened to her body at the sight of Tobirama.

‘Forgive me for not greeting you right away, Kakashi’, a smile not reaching her eyes graced her face. ‘Did the journey go trouble-free?’

‘No problems along the way’, he confirmed, eyeing her suspiciously.

For a split second, she stuck out the tip of her tongue, which in their vocabulary of discreet communication meant they had to talk privately. 

‘We do however need to return to the conversation we did not finish before leaving the camp’, he added smoothly. ‘If Hashirama has not made corrections, my quarters are that way. Enjoy your day, Lord Tobirama.’

Upon reaching a small structure isolated from the rest of the buildings, Kakashi looked questioningly at his friend. 

‘I'll need your help’, she went straight to the point. 'I will explain the details later. You have to keep an eye on me so I don't pass out during regeneration because I wanted to test a poison and took too much.’

‘What the fuck, Sakura?’, Kakashi frowned and hastily prepared a mat for her to lay on. ‘Nothing like this has ever happened before.’

‘I panicked, okay?’, Hatake rolled his eyes. ‘Tobirama was just outside the door.’

‘So you poisoned yourself? That’s a bit of an overkill if you ask me’, he laughed hollowly. ‘Should I prepare a barrier?’

But of course, Tobirama overheard the whole conversation. On purpose. He simply could not lose her and had to act. He barged into Kakashi's house.

‘If there is anything I can do to help, please say so’, he said, ignoring the baffled Hatake.

‘You can go away’, she snapped and winced in pain. ‘Fuck. I won't die so easily. You don't have to watch, get out.’

‘Lord Tobirama may be able to use your technique’, Kakashi's suggestion enraged the kunoichi.

‘As long as you keep me conscious, I won't need it’, she hissed and released her seal. ‘Damn, I didn't have time to renew my blood. Well, I guess there's nothing I can do about it.’

The woman jabbed a chakra scalpel into her thigh, which began to bleed. Tobirama cursed and knelt beside her, ignoring her rage.

‘Sakura, tell me what to do and I'll do it’, said in as calm a voice as he could manage. ‘Another loss of blood will not do you any good.’

‘I'll be fine witho-, fuck!’, she groaned in pain and hit the floor with her fist, making a hole. 

‘You want to destroy my house?’, Kakashi’s attempt at humour fell flat on them. ‘Just allow yourself to be helped.’

‘I understand you do not need me, but I have no wish for you to suffer’, despite all the anger, Sakura's heart squeezed at the sight of desperation in his crimson eyes.

‘You need to create a water sphere and press it into my chest. I’ll try to guide your chakra to the largest concentration of poison’, she finally gave up. ‘Don't stop even if I scream.’

Tobirama followed her instructions, took off her turtleneck and cringed when she growled in pain but held firm. Kakashi fetched a bowl from the kitchen equipment and set it beside them. He also took a towel to wipe Sakura's forehead of sweat. Despite the unimaginable suffering, Sakura managed to guide Senju's chakra to the right place. The man felt something begin to gather in the sphere and increased the pull towards its centre. The kunoichi's muscles trembled. She bit her lip to the blood but refused to allow herself any more humiliation.

‘Your control of the water chakra is excellent’, she managed to mutter. 

‘I am flattered but focus on what I have to do’, Tobirama replied. ‘When should I draw it out?’

‘I’ll hold out for a while longer’, Sakura mumbled and Tobirama realized that the longer he kept the water in her, the more she suffered, so he immediately took it out and placed it in a bowl. ‘But you've already pulled out almost all of it!’

‘Rest a while’, said and wiped his forehead from sweat. ‘Do you do this often? It is exhausting.’

‘More often than I'd like’, she breathed heavily. ‘Let's get this over with.’

Senju repeated the procedure. This time, there was considerably less poison collected in the sphere of water. Nevertheless, it was still a significant amount. Finally, Sakura raised her hand as a sign that it was over and closed the Hundred Strength Seal. She put on her turtleneck and fixed her dishevelled hair.

‘I know you could manage on your own, but I cannot watch you suffer’, Tobirama whispered when Kakashi went to pour out the tainted water. ‘I apologise for what I said earlier.’

‘Apology accepted’, Haruno sighed heavily. ‘The poison will still need testing, but-’

‘Test it on me’, his offer baffled her.

‘What?’, she frowned. 

‘It will be easier for you to take the poison out of me than for me to help you’, Senju’s reasoning made sense. 

‘How romantic’, Kakashi's sarcastic interjection interrupted their conversation. ‘Are you going to poison each other?’

‘In the name of science’, Hatake snorted hearing Sakura’s reply. 

‘Do you always test poisons in this way?’, Tobirama was curious. ‘I have seen you test an antidote on yourself once before.’

‘This is the most reliable and ethical solution’, she shrugged. ‘You don't become an expert on poisons without knowing how they work.’

‘Get out of here, I have no wish to listen to insane scientists’, actually Kakashi just wanted some privacy. ‘See you around.’

‘Rude’, Sakura scoffed but got up. ‘Sorry about your floor.’

When they came outside, the woman looked at Tobirama. He looked genuinely exhausted. 

‘Forgive me for my outburst back at the lab’, she said. 

‘Sorry for being an ass’, he replied with a slight smile. ‘I hope you do not mind my intervention.’

‘Actually, I do not’, Sakura admitted, looking away. ‘Thank you for helping me.’

‘You are quite stubborn’, Tobirama knew this word did not convey the gravity of the situation. ‘If nothing of greater importance comes up, we can meet tomorrow in the laboratory.’

‘Tomorrow?’, he raised a brow, hearing the disappointment in her voice. ‘Uh. I-’

‘I will try to interfere less with your life’, he explained, still bearing the sight of her anger in mind. ‘But I am open to any suggestions.’

'I thought you would like to put a new seal on my body. I can do it myself, but...', she stopped talking.

‘I would’, Tobirama smirked, looked around and lowered his voice. ‘I would like that very much.’ 

‘Do not speak to me in that voice when we are in a public place’, she demanded, feeling heat creeping on her cheeks; her blush endlessly amused him but now he knew better than to point it out.

‘There is no one around’, he replied.

‘I am!’, Kakashi shouted from behind his door and they suddenly realised that they were still standing outside his house. ‘I refuse to listen to you. Go away.’

Well, for ninjas they sure were remarkably indiscreet.


	33. Chapter 33

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> CW: childbirth in hospital

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the break. I had some doubts about my writing skills. On top of that, I've been busy designing characters for another story that I'll be starting in a while. The chapter is rather short, sorry for that.

As Tobirama sat on Sakura's bed and waited for her to finish her shower, he was sure his brother favoured her over him. The mattress was incredibly soft and the blanket was made of pricey material. Compared to his bed, her bedding was almost divine. He stopped to think about the furnishings of the quarters, however, as the woman removed her turtleneck and turned to face him. He wanted to keep his cool, but he was enchanted by the elemental seals stretching from the tip of her index finger to her shoulder. The water seal was nearly complete and Tobirama wondered what the effects of releasing it would be. Since condensed earth chakra could crush a large chunk of soil, water chakra should also have curious results. The man frowned, seeing the scars on her side.

‘These do not disappear during regeneration?’, he asked and she shook her head.

‘To get rid of a scar, I have to cut it and heal it properly’, the medic explained. ‘Besides, they come in handy when I want to test something on scar tissue. Could you apply the seal already?’

While he would have loved to marvel longer at her previously concealed body, he could see that she was shivering from the cold. Sure, it was still late summer, but the nights were getting chilly. He concentrated chakra in his palm and placed it on her sternum. Tobirama was aware of how painful it was to apply the seal directly to the skin, so he admired that the woman had not even flinched this time. As soon as the mark of the Flying Thunder God appeared on her skin, she nodded and pulled her clothes back on.

‘Is multilayered sealing possible?’, Sakura inquired suddenly. ‘That is, can I seal something that has already been sealed without compromising the initial technique?’

‘In theory, this would be possible. Perhaps if one used seals of the same type with some alteration linking the two formulas’, Tobirama was thinking aloud. ‘However, I have never delved into this subject. There was no dire need.’

‘This is where we differ. You usually create techniques with a goal in mind, while my inventions are more about testing different paths with only a general outline of the final result’, the woman inelegantly flopped down on the bed and put her hands on her stomach. ‘I knew the effects of the plants I used to create the poison, but I gave no thought to how they would work in combination. I simply tried them out on myself.’

Silence fell between them.

‘It was organ failure, by the way’, she added and for some reason that amused the man greatly. ‘I am delighted that my misery entertains you.’

‘I am not laughing at you, I merely found your delivery of the message entertaining’, he clarified hastily and she snorted. ‘I am beginning to suspect that you are the one making fun of me.’

‘Perhaps’, she smiled slightly but then turned serious. ‘I apologise again for the outburst earlier. I am just so frustrated with all of this. The responsibility I have brought on our shoulders. The guilt after Sasuke's death.’

Tobirama had no idea what to say, so he simply reached out and stroked her hair. She seemed to appreciate the gesture since she closed her eyes.

‘Have you ever made friends with an Uchiha?’, her question was unexpected, but it did not make the man stop caressing her hair.

‘As a matter of fact, yes’, Tobirama admitted and Sakura opened her eyes to look at him curiously. ‘Kagami Uchiha. I could trust him both on the battlefield and in personal matters. The kid came into my life uninvited, and I never had it in me to reject him.’

‘Kagami Uchiha…’, Sakura repeated, trying to remember where she heard that name. ‘Kagami of the Liquid Flame?’

‘No doubt he had to earn that title after my death’, answered the man. ‘I have no recollection of him being called that in my lifetime.’

Sakura was struck by the realisation.

‘In one of the history books it was said that he became the Kagami of Liquid Flame during the First Shinobi War, and the title was derived from his Mangekyō Sharingan's ability’, she said slowly. ‘Forgive me if this is insensitive, but is it possible that your death pushed him to awaken the Mangekyō Sharingan?’

The man withdrew his hand and appeared to be deep in thought. Was this possible? Considering how close their friendship was, it was certainly a strong possibility. Despite their age difference of several years, they got along very well. He thought fondly of the energetic young man who joked even in the direst situations. Tobirama had always appreciated his sense of humour and how much of a cheeky brat he was. Someone like that was a breath of fresh air in an otherwise grim world. Hashirama and Kagami were the people he trusted the most, and now Sakura had joined that circle. Absentmindedly, he mused that the Uchiha was sure to like the fiery woman. How old was he now? If Tobirama was now twenty-six, then Kagami must have been seventeen or eighteen. Long grown up by ninja standards.

‘Do you know anything about his future after the war?’, he did not answer directly.

‘That will be upsetting for you’, Sakura had warned him.

‘I need to know’, Senju insisted. 

‘Kagami almost single-handedly ended the First Shinobi War’, the woman paused for a moment, collecting her thoughts. ‘He was said to have been engulfed by a colossal flame. It did not scald him, but his enemies turned to dust under a single touch. Not long after this display, Kumogakure surrendered. Kagami was declared a hero, but several years later he disappeared and his body was never found.’

Tobirama was unable to answer because he suspected what had occurred. He had researched the Uchiha's bodies himself. Though he knew full well it was hypocritical, he was furious that his friend's body had most likely been stolen for research purposes. 

‘We should have discussed this long ago’, Sakura sighed heavily. ‘Your disciple had defiled the body of your brother and probably your friend's as well. He needs to be prevented from going down that path again.’

‘My brother's body?’, he frowned. ‘Elaborate.’

‘Oh, you… you did not know’, Sakura bit her lip, fully prepared for an outburst of justified wrath. ‘Danzō most probably took Hashirama's body and conducted research on Mokuton. I know from Sasuke's interrogation report that he tried to master the wood style, but it was very unstable in his body.’

‘Danzō has always been a coward and competed with Saru’, Tobirama's voice was deep and calm as ever, but the undertone of anger was perceptible. ‘I should not be at all surprised that he resorted to cowardly measures for the rest of his life.’

‘Do you have any idea where the challenge of learning the Wood Style comes from?’, she asked to change the topic slightly.

‘It is a temperamental force and requires complete dedication to nature. For this reason, Hashirama is its only user, although technically every Senju has the Mokuton genes. He has always been fond of both plants and animals, unlike the rest of the clan preoccupied with war’, Tobirama explained. ‘No wonder Danzō failed to harness Mokuton. The only thing he valued in life was his own safety.‘

‘Every Senju?’, Sakura turned over onto her stomach and rested her head on her hands curiously. ‘Have you ever tried to learn Mokuton, then?’

‘No’, he admitted. ‘My approach has always been a bit too pragmatic for such a project.’

Sakura could not comprehend this. If she could learn this divine art, she would not hesitate even for a moment. On the other hand, she truly could not deny Tobirama's mastery of water techniques. Had he concentrated on Mokuton, he might not have achieved so much. Suddenly the woman covered her face to hide a yawn.

‘It pains me to hear you find me this boring’, Tobirama joked with a sigh and stood up. ‘Rest well and never do such a stupid thing again.’

It was strangely amusing that she had already fallen asleep and certainly had not heard his request. Tobirama was nearly positive that the woman would test poisons and other substances on herself many times in the future. He gently kissed her forehead after a moment's hesitation. Then he used Hiraishin to get back to his quarters, and after only an hour, he knew he would never fall asleep without Sakura's soothing presence. After a few months of working on technique together and a week of sharing quarters, he was too deep. He reached into the hospital building with his chakra and sank into Sakura's power. Tobirama felt his new seal on her body, allowing him to pinpoint her chakra more accurately. It was calm, though somewhat weakened from the poisoning. However, it was regaining its strength quickly. Perhaps he no longer felt her warmth or her hand in his hair, but her chakra had to be enough for him. Knowing that she was both secure and at rest, he finally managed to fall asleep on his own. 

She woke prematurely because of knocking on the door and immediately got off the bed, even from the distance smelling the metallic scent of blood. Kunoichi opened the door and cursed, seeing a black-haired woman holding her sizeable belly. Some man was supporting her, but that obviously did nothing to stop the bleeding. Without asking any more questions, Sakura grabbed the woman and moved her effortlessly onto the hospital bed while infusing healing chakra into her body. She was angry with herself for not thinking of recruiting a temporary medical formation.

Tobirama began to roll from side to side in his sleep.

‘Which month?’, Sakura asked, expertly manoeuvring her chakra.

‘I am not sure... the baby grew terribly fast', the woman's husband replied with panic in his voice. ‘Shiori fell over in the dark and began to bleed. I beg you, save my wife!’

‘No! Save… our baby’, said the woman, breathing heavily. ‘He... or she... will…’

‘I swear I will save you both’, the sheer determination on Sakura's face silenced them immediately. ‘Four of you, in fact.’

‘F...four?’, muttered the Uchiha with his eyes wide open. ‘Are you saying…’

‘Let me save my congratulations for later’, emotions did not shake Sakura's voice. ‘Shiori-san, during the fall your uterus ruptured. You'll be fine, but I'll have to perform a caesarean section. Otherwise, there is a risk of death to you or your children.’

Tobirama had no desire to invade the patient's privacy, so he averted his gaze and studied Sakura's chakra instead of looking. As always, calm and controlled, precisely measured. 

She divided her chakra to create two shadow clones and Tobirama was shocked, sensing that she had managed to divide the power unevenly. One of the clones prepared a mixture of herbs to alleviate the pain and the other went for water. After giving the woman the painkiller, the medic activated her chakra blade and cut through the patient's abdomen. She was relieved to find that the peritoneum remained unaffected. As one of her doppelgangers continuously cleaned the blood and checked the woman's condition, the kunoichi extracted three children. Sakura handed the infants to the man and her clone. She immediately took to treating the ruptured uterus and surgical wounds. The medic was pleased to find that not even a trace of the incision would remain. She rinsed her hands in water and wiped them in a towel. The patient was safe and held her crying children wrapped in blankets in her arms. The shocked father of three stroked his wife's head. 

‘What is your name, medic?’, asked the woman lying in the hospital bed.

‘Sakura Haruno’, she replied.

‘Sakura Haruno, thank you’, she bowed her head respectfully. ‘For my life and that of my children. 

‘I have only done my job’, Sakura protested.

‘Few save the mothers’, sadness was evident in the man's voice. ‘In the Uchiha clan, the number three is special. I believe that the birth of the three as the village's first children indicates a good fate to it.’

‘Shiori-san, don't strain yourself too much’, Sakura knew perfectly well why this number was exceptional for Uchiha and changed the topic. ‘Certain effects of pregnancy are inevitable and simple treatment will not prevent them. In case something bad happens, do not hesitate to come in. For the time being, you are free to go.’

Before that, the woman wrote down the patient's information and reminded the pair that she would be making a follow-up appointment in a few weeks. They left the hospital, their thanks seemingly endless. Sakura sent the clones to clean up and breathed heavily. She had always felt discomfort in the delivery room during her career as a medical ninja. How could another innocent being be brought into a world full of suffering and war? Haruno had no time to dwell on it any longer, as Tobirama appeared in the hospital room and helped her clones with the cleaning.

‘You should be sleeping’, Sakura said, washing her hands. 

‘The motion of your chakra woke me up’, he explained reluctantly. ‘Perhaps you could develop some sort of sleep-inducing blend?’

‘But you are the genius and inventor’, the woman smirked and wiped her wet hands on her trousers. 

‘I have never taken an interest in herbs. It is my brother's field’, Tobirama admitted. 

Sakura frowned and dismissed the clones.

‘Do your sensory skills not require chakra moulding?’, her question was unexpected. ‘Tobirama, have you slept at all? And don't you dare lie.’

‘I was sleeping!’, he exclaimed truthfully. ‘And yes, you are correct. My ability is not a passive one.’

‘Then what’s the matter?’, she inquired impatiently, annoyed by his incoherent answers. 

‘To explain it simply, your chakra... puts me at ease and when I reached out to you, I managed to fall asleep’, Tobirama was furious with himself that he felt again the infernal heat on his cheeks. ‘I remain sufficiently aware to maintain contact.’

‘Who would have thought that the insane scholar and ninja slayer can be so cute?’, Sakura smiled broadly and, to his utter horror, poked his cheek with her finger. 

‘In the last few days you have proven that you are the insane one’, the man muttered in a feeble attempt to regain his dignity. 

‘Well, since you have so generously cleaned up, I have nothing left to do’, she shrugged. ‘If you have nothing more to tell me, I wish you a good night.’

She turned away and was about to push the door open when Tobirama inhaled heavily and shoved his pride aside. 

‘May I stay?’, he asked, expertly erasing the shame and uncertainty from his voice. 

‘Perhaps’, she declared with false consideration. 

‘...please?’, Tobirama added, barely refraining from rolling his eyes.

‘The great Tobirama Senju asks me politely for something? How could I refuse?’, the man felt more and more like enduring another sleepless night, hearing her mockery. ‘Despite your murderous intent, I reckon we can share a bed.’

All shame evaporated when he felt her hand in his hair again. Over such a brief break, he had already longed for it. And this time Sakura was so close that he could feel her warmth. He put his arm around her experimentally, and when she had not backed off, he let out a content sound unintentionally. The woman lying beside him began to shake from poorly suppressed laughter. 

‘You are purring’, she blurted out through her amusement.

He immediately fell silent. 

‘Sorry’, she said quietly, having calmed down. ‘It was quite pleasant, actually.’

‘I refuse to do it ever again’, the man grunted with annoyance.

‘Cute’, Sakura smiled happily and pressed herself closer to him.

Tobirama could not banish his former disciple from his thoughts until he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no idea about children. 
> 
> However, I passed all my exams! I was getting a bit scared that I would have to give up my academic career. Well, biomedical engineering has given me another chance.


End file.
